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guilt-induced gratitude

yesterday I got the first dose of the covid vaccine. &yes I can confirm I did not turn into a zombie monster alien creature. but also the experience wasn’t all butterflies&rainbows. I had symptoms (to be expected). &at the peak of my symptoms, feeling all yuck&blah, I caught myself saying “people wish they could have what I got, so I will suck it up & be grateful”.

yeah, guilt-induced gratitude hitting me hard.

now, more than ever, in my opinion of course, there is so much pressure to feel grateful for health. all around me is pain&suffering, death&grieving. i should be grateful for my health & the opportunity to be vaccinated, right? my discomfort is temporary & less than the suffering of the ones around me, right? maybe right. but that does not make my situation invalid. &guilting myself into gratitude is only further invalidating my feelings.

guilt grabs gratitude like weapon to use against me.

my feelings are valid. I am allowed to feel my feelings. it is okay to not feel grateful in this moment, I will try again later.

insta: letteringanddoodling

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{ #updates } || source: apeaceofwerk

Your mental health is a priority, your happiness is an essential, your self-care is a necessity 🌻 #mentalhealth #selfcare #happiness #sunflower #irishblogger #bloggerswanted #blogger #takecareofyourself #yourfeelingsarevalid https://www.instagram.com/p/BtSLlPQnxpQ/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=9vqfkaynms7q

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