You and Yoongi had been dating for several months, and so far everything had been going great. But as things continued to progress between you, you knew that you needed to have a conversation with him about the fact that your were demi, ideally sooner rather than later.

You'd been trying to find a way to bring it up casually, but no such opportunity had made itself available, so you had decided to just bite the bullet and put it out there.

"So, um, there's something I've been wanting to tell you but I didn't know how to bring it up, but I think it's important that you know about me." You took a breath to steady your nerves. "I'm demisexual."

"Oh," His blinked, brows raising slightly in surprise. "Okay."

"Do you know what that means?" You asked.

"A little? I've head the term before." He said "But what does it mean, like, for you specifically?"

"Basically, it means that I don't feel sexually attracted to people unless I have a really close emotional connection with them."

"That makes sense." He nodded along as you explained.

"Are you okay with that?" You asked.

"Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

"I just- I didn't know if it would be a problem for you." You said awkwardly.

"Why would it be a problem?"

"Because it means that we might not have sex for a long time?"

"That's fine." He shrugged

"Really?" You asked, stunned by his nonchalance about the whole thing. In the past, when you'd told other people, they'd been less than understanding about the subject.

"I'm not an animal, y/n." He scoffed. "I'm not dating you for sex, I'm dating you because I like you and I like being with you. You make me happy." He took you hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "None of that changes because of this, okay?"

"Okay." You whispered, your eyes misting over at his words. "Thank you."

"Thank you for telling me." He said, smiling.

"Can I hug you?" You asked.

- Hi. – she said looking at anywhere but his eyes. - Hi, y\n. I’m here to pick him. -Yeah.. hum.. he’s ready! – she open the door leaving space for him to enter. Dexter raises his ears at the moment he heard Yoongi’s voice. - come here boy, come! – Yoongi said, slapping his tights to call the dog. - are you sure you want to take him to your house today? He is really messy.. – she said relying on the wall, trying and failing in not look at him and how pretty he was. Yoongi was trying not to think much about all that was going on. He really loves her, and they had broken up less than one month. All the kisses, hugs, encouragements, laughs and other stuffs were over. No more of her coming to his practice’s, no more yelling and cheering when he was rapping . No more snuggling together and cuddling while watching a movie. Nothing. All because of him. He was the one who broke up. “I know she’ll end up hurt, so I’m gonna do this now, before I mess her life even more than I already did. ”- yes.. I’m sure. – he said shortly leaning over to pet the dog . – I’ll drop him here from two days, okay? - Fine by me. They both let the silence settle down in the room. Yoongi was the one to start talking again while got up. - You look really nice. Are you doing fine? –he looked right into her eyes. y\n felt the rage raising in her chest. She tried to breath and calm down before answer him, but “what kind of stupid question was that?”. She missed him like hell and cried every night remember the moments they had together. “He just woke up one day and decide that he doesn’t need me anymore. What am I? A joke? Someone so disposable that he just decided I wasn’t good for him anymore? And telling me that was because he doesn’t want to see me hurt in the future? What the hell this even mean? ” - what do you think Yoon? Do you think I'm okay? Look at me, closely. – her voice was high now. She was losing it. -I.. didn’t.. I’m.. - you know what? You told me that you didn’t want to see me hurt in the future, but guess what? IM HURT NOW! Every time I wake up I reach for you … but you’re never there.. cause you’re gone. Cause you CHOSE to leave. What we had didn’t mean anything for you, right? - of course it meant something! - it clearly don’t Yoongi! What did you break up then? I don’t understand! - You’ll never win with me, Y\n. She didn’t say anything. He continued. - is the life you want? Not being able to do nothing freely, like walking in the streets, not be able to post a selfie without receiving hate comments, not being able to walk feeling safe afraid of someone following you and taking pictures every damn time? - all I wanted was a life where you were part of. It was like a knife in his stomach. He felt the same and maybe even more. “Can’t she tell that this is killing me?” - don’t you miss me? – she said starting to cry. - i’m sick and tired of missing you, Yoon.. I can’t do this anymore. I thought that see you, even when you broke up would do me some good, but it didn’t. it just reminds me that I’m not enough for you. Not enough for you to try. You can’t just show up like this anymore. I can’t do this. She was bursting into tears now, trying to hold her own sobs. - y\n.. – Yoongi hold his fists closed, trying not running and hug her. - I'm feeling stupid crying like a baby in front of you.. “fuck it”, he thought while started to walk towards her. - Come here .. Hey, don’t cry. – he pulled her to his arms, stroking her hair – I’m so sorry. i know i messed up. you mean everything to me. I don’t have anything if I don’t have you. I’m hurting like hell.. I.. – his voice disappeared. She continued to cry. - I know. – she said hold his shirt tightly. - You don’t have to say anything. I know. He continued to hug her. He tried to feel everything he could, not knowing if this will happen again. - I’m drenching your shirt. – she said smiling. - I don’t mind. You’re crying because of me. This is the least I can do. y\n stayed holding him, listen the beat of his hair, inhaling his scent. This wasn’t right. They couldn’t keep doing that. “It’s not fair making him have to deal with me, keep seeing me. This is broken both of us”. Yoongi gave a little space to look at her, checking if she was okay. y\n looked directly to his eyes, she wasn’t crying anymore. - I forgive you, Yoon. –she gave him a little smile. - you’re my favorite person in the world and I love you. He kept listening. - But you and me know we’re wasting our times.. and this is not fair to the both of us. it’s time for things to change. Heaven knows I want to marry you and have little Min Suga’s running in our house.. - she tried to keep smiling but the tears were coming. - I can see right through you. I can see you broken too. And suffering. And I know that ‘cause there wasn’t a single time in our relationship where I was hurting that you wasn’t hurting too. You are and always were compassioned. And I admire this in you so, so much Yoon! Yoongi started to cry. He knew where she was trying to get. In his minds he knew that was the best for them, but his heart, sould.. Dammit his whole body said otherwise. He was loosing her. - i don’t want to do this anymore. I can’t. He was crying louder now, holding his sobs with his hands. She started to cry too, but none of them touch each other anymore. - I have to let you go. I love you enough to let you go. Yoongi covered his hands, crying louder. y\n was still crying but couldn’t watch this, so started to gather Dexter’s things and putting in his little bag. She offers the hand to Yoongi looking in his eyes. - you should go. Yoongi took the bag unable to say anything. He just took Dexter and walk towards the door, y\n walking right behind him. He turns to face her before leave. - I love you so, so much Y/N. I’m sorry.

later..

That was a principle that you’ve always stuck through ever since you were young. Your mind always triumphed over whatever emotion you held. That was why you were completely fine with moving away from Daegu at a young age, even if you had to leave behind everything you’ve grown comfortable to for the first fifteen years of your life. You knew that it would be too impractical to demand from your parents that you stayed in Korea, while the rest of them were overseas.

You were the practical type, the logical one, the type who never gave in to whatever emotions you felt, knowing that you were going to just ruin yourself if you did. That was why you and Yoongi became friends at a young age, because you never paid attention to the bullies, preferring to not run after them, instead you just simply stayed in the shade, rather than dirtying your white shirt and get scolded by your mother for not being careful.

Yoongi, well, he was always lethargic, even at a young age.

“You’re definitely adopted! Look at you! Your mom looks really pretty, but you look like trash!” A boy around your age shouted towards your direction, while you clenched your fists in anger. It wasn’t your fault that you looked like your father and his genes were stronger, but the five-year-old you didn’t know anything about genes.

All you knew was that you looked like your dad, so you definitely weren’t adopted.

“She can’t even fight for herself! Coward! Coward! Coward!” He called out in a sing-song voice, running away from your direction.

You wanted to run after them, but there was a high chance that you were going to trip and get your shirt dirty, and you knew better than to give your mom a hard time with washing the clothes. You pursued your lips together, thinking of words to retort back to them, but you decided to stay under the shade and just look at all the other kids, playing and running around the field.

“You’re very strong.”

Well, except for one.

You turned around and saw a pale, white kid who was also around your age. He was pale, thin, but he had a disinterested look on his face, as if he was eternally tired, even when it was just ten in the morning.

“Thank you,” you smiled back at him as he pushed his toy car towards you, a gummy grin appearing on his pale face.

“Wanna play? My name’s Yoongi.”

And that was why, at this very moment, you were not going to let your emotions get the better of you. If the five-year-old you was able to control herself in front of bullies who called her trash, you could also control yourself in front of your asshole first love, who had the guts to lie to you, even when he was your new client.

It was your third day in the Min Conglomerate as their externally-resourced consultant.

However, your first day in the company did not play out the exact way as people might think.

It wasn’t overly dramatic. In fact, you were pretty calm when you first saw him, considering that you’ve read the documents prepared for you beforehand. That was when you found out that Yoongi was the President and CEO of the big (but nearly-bankrupt) conglomerate (though, you did end up drunk in the hotel bar after you’ve gone through all the documents the first time.)

Having known him in his forming years, you’ve always known that his older brother was supposed to inherit the corporation, but, after becoming their consultant, you found out that said brother made stupid decisions by investing in overpriced properties, bankrupt corporations, and overused business ventures. That was why it was pretty obvious why he would kicked out by the other investors.

Guess having an Ivy-League degree didn’t necessarily make one a good businessman, if one didn’t have the talent and instinct for it.

On the other hand, it was under Yoongi’s leadership, that the conglomerate was able to recover, even if it was barely. They had a merger with one rival corporation when Yoongi took over his brother’s post. However, what it did was just place them on the point of break-even. Clearly, the investors still weren’t satisfied with it.

And that was why, the consulting firm you were employed in was hired by the Min Conglomerate.

But, at this moment, you were just trying to hold in to your emotions and not just scream at the necks of some incapable employees, whom you have no idea why and how they were exactly hired. You partially suspected that it was nepotism, reminding yourself that it was one of the things that you had to take note of when you were through with your one-week assessment of the corporation.

Plus, the bad keynote presentations that seemed like they were made by tenth grade students nowadays. And maybe some tenth grade students may have done a better job than them.

“Well, I was also thinking that we utilize social media nowadays since it can really help with marketing our products,” the presenter drawled in as you resisted the urge to yawn.

Everyone knew that social media was in the hype nowadays and that it was typical to use it for marketing purposes. But, you didn’t get why this corporation seemed so adamant on using old-style marketing.

That was another problem you saw with this corporation. They seemed to be so stuck on using what worked for them in the past. It’s as if they didn’t know what sort of change technology could bring in. They might even have the latest computer software and gadgets in the company, but what use was it when their very core was very traditional?

”-so, like, we have a Facebook page, right? Why don’t we use it to make, like, online raffle draws? And then, we give away big prizes like a car or something!“

Was she insane? The conglomerate was on the verge of collapsing and she has this idea of giving away expensive things that could’ve been used to invest in actual profitable investments?

You could feel an impending headache surfacing as you took a sip from your water bottle, hoping that there would be some sort of miracle that would turn your bottled water to beer. You needed a drink at this point.

"Let’s cut this meeting short. I’m not satisfied with the presentation you’re giving me. Meeting dismissed,” Yoongi’s voice echoed throughout the board room as the presenter gave a nod and slight bow before she left the room. The rest of the marketing department followed suit, leaving you, Yoongi, and his trusty secretary, Jung Hoseok.

You stayed silent, typing on your laptop the observations you’ve made during the marketing department report presentation. You silently fumed, wondering how this company was able to stay afloat, especially with the entrance of start-up companies that created products or services that were several times more innovative than whatever product/service the Min Conglomerate offered. You sighed to yourself, saving the document as you looked up from your laptop and saw the expectant face of Hoseok.

“So, how is it, Miss Consultant? Were you impressed by our Marketing Department?” Hoseok asked, a very cheerful and optimistic look on his face, though you have to say that optimistic was an understatement.

“Didn’t you see her face earlier, Hoseok? She was getting a headache and that was why I called off the presentation as soon as I sensed it,” Yoongi muttered, while Hoseok immediately lowered down his face in embarrassment.

You inwardly hated how Yoongi knew that you were coming down with a headache at that moment, though you knew you benefited from his call to end the meeting at that exact moment. You didn’t really appreciate how he would just end everything about that department when you had yet to see the other departments. Yesterday, you went to the Administrative Department and you had also cringed the whole time during their presentation.

“Once again, I’ll send in the evaluation sheet based from the presentation I was able to witness today,” you scratched your head, wondering if you were just going to see disappointment after disappointment. But, you knew this was a big job that obviously required you, at the very least, a month to work on. One and a half month, if you were lucky. Though, judging from the way thing were fairing, perhaps, two months?

“I’ve gone through the document you sent me yesterday. It was very depressing,” Yoongi frowned, taking out a printed copy of the report you sent him.

It was a document that listed down all the mistakes that the Administrative Department made during the presentation: from the systems that they listed down to the manner on how they presented.

“Ah, yes. Well, those are just some problems I saw based from the presentation they gave. I’m afraid, I’m gonna have to do a more in-depth investigation into that department,” you hinted as he clenched his forehead.

“Ugh,” he groaned, “I should’ve just went on to become some rapper if I knew that this was going to be worst.”

You pursued your lips together, unsure on what to say. You knew, however, that being the filial child he was, he wasn’t going to just let his family fall down the drain. If they were probably in a more stable state, then Yoongi must have definitely pursued his dreams, even if he had to leave his family.

“Come on, Yoongi. Don’t be like that,” Hoseok coaxed him. “We both know that you’re the only one who could’ve handle the mess your older brother did.“

Yoongi said nothing as a retort, probably to avoid talking about what exactly happened.

Yet, you didn’t even need them to inform you about the stupid investments his brother did, based from the annual reports from the past decade that you’ve actually gone through the weekend following your uncle’s birthday party. It was also the very same weekend after you met Yoongi once again, the very same weekend you found out that he was married.

Still, even if the two of you played it off as if you didn’t know each other on your first day in the corporation, his eyes could never hide the shame (or guilt?) he felt when he saw you.

And maybe, you, too. Maybe, you couldn’t hide the disgust and anger you felt towards him.

"You know, I feel like we haven’t exactly had a welcome meal for you, Miss Consultant! We should have lunch together with President Min,” Hoseok invited you, a welcoming look on his face. He must’ve said it to just break the heavy atmosphere in the room, following his comment. However, he didn’t have to know that it was heavy because of something else.

“I assure you that the restaurant we will visit is good. I have good taste in Korean food, after all. You can ask President Min for the restaurants I’ve recommended to him,” he added, pointing to Yoongi, who just nodded at what Hoseok said. “See! Speaking of which, Yoongi, did you go to the restaurant I told you in Jeju?” He turned to Yoongi, who blinked his eyes for a moment.

“Ah, yes,” Yoongi replied, but he was staring at you directly, though it didn’t seem like Hoseok noticed. “I enjoyed the kimchi soup in that restaurant and the seafood tasted great, too.”

He was obviously referring to the rundown Korean restaurant the two of you discovered, while going around Jeju. You turned away from him, deciding to look at the eager secretary who was searching for restaurants on his phone.

“There’s this good restaurant nearby! They serve really goo-”

“Maybe next time, Secretary Jung. I have to meet up with a friend. Excuse me, gentlemen,” you cut Hoseok off before you picked up your laptop and left the conference room, rushing for the elevator.

You immediately went inside the elevator as soon as soon as it opened, but you were caught by a Min Yoongi who followed you as soon as you left. You said nothing as he stepped into the elevator with you. He immediately clicked the button for the floor he was supposed to head to: his office at the top floor.

“Talk to me,” Yoongi coerced you, breaking the silence.

“You left Mr. Jung behind? I thought you were eating lunch with him,” you responded, not wanting to talk about it.

You knew what he wanted to talk about, but you were not going to mull over it. As far as you were concerned, you were over the whole thing. While there was a residue of emotions, but you’ve accepted what happened and you knew that you technically had no fault in the matter.

“Not about that,” he maintained, scratching his head. “Look, I have to explain what’s up-”

“Yoongi, stop this,” you cut him off, refusing to listen to whatever explanation he might have for you. “I’m not going to listen to whatever you have to say to me because I don’t think I can listen to you anymore after what happened,” you took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself down. “Yoongi, you lied to me! You told me that you had no girlfriend at all, you-”

“Technically, I had no girlfriend,” he interjected.

“Which is worse because you were married, for god’s sake! It was adultery,” you whispered the last part, a bit conscious of the security camera in the elevator. The last thing they needed was its top management head having an affair scandal. That kind of scandal would really bring about the conglomerate’s downfall.

You huffed out a heavy breath. ”You omitted to tell me that part and that counts as lying! Yoongi, I don’t think I can ever believe in whatever you’ll say at this point. So, please just leave me alone.“

As if on cue, the elevator reached the floor you wanted to go down on - the floor that held your makeshift office during your stay in the corporation. You walked out of the elevator as you didn’t bother to look back at Min Yoongi. You knew he was probably looking dejected right now, but he was nothing but a cheater who dragged you into this mess, even when you knew nothing about it. You became a third party, a mistress, even when you never wanted it in the first place.

What happened to Min Yoongi that he would even think about cheating in the first place? Didn’t he abhor his father who kept on cheating on his wife with several women? You briefly remembered a thirteen-year-old Yoongi who got into a fist fight with some guys in your year level back in middle school. Apparently, Yoongi punched him all of sudden at the school cafeteria. The teachers ruled it out as teenage angst and him being in his rebellious phase, but you knew Yoongi better than to believe what they said.

"I hate cheaters” was all that he told you when you tried to ask him.

The first guy he punched was a notorious playboy in your year level, who nearly tried to hit on you, if it weren’t for the fact that you were always by Yoongi’s side. Later on, you would find out in an impromptu visit to Yoongi’s house that his father brought another woman into their home, while his mother was away in Paris.

You sighed to yourself, clenching the chopsticks you were holding in the small, quaint restaurant you were in. The restaurant was a small one you found while you were out walking for a restaurant that didn’t seem like a place where posh, rich CEOs wouldn’t dine in. The food was good, but it was small that it was immediately filled with customers as soon as lunch break started.

“Can I sit here?”

You turned up and saw a man holding up a tray of food, motioning to the empty seat across you. You nodded nonchalantly, since you were alone and you were already halfway your food. The man sat across you immediately, making you get a good look on his face. Surprisingly, he actually looked familiar.

It was the guy who sat beside you in the plane.

“Ah, weren’t you the girl in the plane to Jeju?” He asked, pointing to you in surprise.

You nodded, a smile making to your features. “What a coincidence to see you here in Daegu,” you grinned as he chuckled and nodded.

After all, what were the chances that you were going to see your plane seat mate to Jeju all the way here in Daegu? Jeju Island was pretty far from Daegu, though it was directly accessible by plane for an hour or so. Still, you knew that the chances of seeing your plane seat mate to Jeju in a different city was meager.

“Well, I actually live around here. But I took the plane from Seoul to Jeju because I was in Seoul for a few weeks,” he motioned to the city before eating the piece of meat he was holding with his chopsticks. “What about you? What’s holding you up here in Daegu? Are you here to go around?” He queried.

You shook your head. “I’m here for work, but it’s just a short-term project,” you smiled back as he nodded in understanding.

“Boss Jin!” A waitress makes her way to your table, but her attention was focused to the guy opposite you. “I know it’s a busy time here in the restaurant, but my aunt told me that my mom was admitted to the emergency room a while ago. I just wanted to ask if I could leave immediately after an hour or so, since the restaurant’s not really busy anymore at that time,” she sheepishly requested as it dawned to you that the person right in front of you was the actual owner of the restaurant.

And that his name was Jin.

“Look, Nara, your mom was admitted to the emergency room, but what the fuck?” You turned to him with a surprised look on his face.

Boy, this employer was probably a slavedriver. You wondered for a moment if he was even going to make it big, especially when a good employer-employee relationship was crucial in-

“Like, seriously, what the fuck are you still doing in this restaurant?”

You paused for a moment, blinking your eyes, realizing that you were perhaps, wrong.

“Boss, I-”

Jin clicked his tongue twice, resting his arms across his chest. “I know it’s going to be busy here, but I can manage it here. Well, probably, but that’s not the point,” he paused for a greater effect, “your mom’s the only mother you’ll ever have, well, aside from your in-laws, but come on, child, we both know you’re working shifts here so that you can help your mom with the expenses at home. So, go now! Scram! Go to your mom now and don’t worry, you’re still going to have your job once you think it’s okay to come back here.”

Nara nodded before she took off her apron. “Thank you so much, boss!” she smiled, a bit teary-eyed before she made her way to the kitchen. Jin smiled and resumed to eating, turning to you as if nothing just happened.

“So, what’s your short-term project about? How long are you going to stay in Daegu?” He quipped before popping rice into his mouth with his chopsticks.

You simply looked at him, quite astonished of how he was such a nice boss, especially with how the place seemed like it was going to be busy in a little while, since lunch time wasn’t even over. “Well, it’s some sort of-”

“I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to cut you off here for now. There’s only one person in the cashier and a group of office workers just came in and I gotta go Diner Dash now,” he smiled sheepishly with an apologetic look on his face. The group was probably composed of ten people, immediately heading to a table that was just cleared. And you knew that they obviously needed help.

You shook your head, understanding his situation, “It’s okay. You don’t have to worry about me.”

He stood up from his seat as he immediately wore the apron that the waitress just left on the table, heading towards the new group of customers with a smile on his face. You observed the way he talked to the customers — patient, hospitable, and warm. He also seemed like he knew the customers, judging from the way that he even gave small jokes as he took their orders. They must be old customers, given that they didn’t even have to look at the menu to order food. It also didn’t take long for the food to get served to their tables by Jin. The food was good, the service was great, the restaurant wasn’t stuffy, the ambiance was good. So, it wasn’t a mystery to wonder why their customers kept on returning to this restaurant. In fact, you might even see yourself becoming a regular in this restaurant.

It must’ve taken an hour for Jin to get back to your table, a surprised look on his face as he took the seat across you. “You’re still here?” He asked as he resumed eating the food he had left earlier.

You nodded, but you had a question bugging you from the back of your head. “Have you ever thought of expanding this restaurant?” You asked, looking at the restaurant that was still filled with customers, though the number of those who were coming in could already be managed by just one person.

Jin paused for a moment, laughing to himself as he looked at his restaurant with an endearing look on his face, before he turned back to you with a raised eyebrow, “I don’t know. I guess, it’s because this restaurant is a mere hobby for me,” he smiled before he proceeded on eating the remaining contents of his bowl.

You simply nodded, but you were a bit bewildered. For sure, he could’ve increased his profits more, given the demand for the food this restaurant produced, but the prices were pretty affordable, despite the taste of the food being delectable, even for foodies.

“I mean, sometimes, not everything in life is about profits, you know. Sometimes, we want to do something just because we want to. And well, cooking has always been something I’ve always been passionate about, so it made sense that I would pursue a restaurant business,” he added, scratching his head at the last part.

“So, you’re a restaurant owner, who’s also passionate for books?” You surmised, remembering your first meeting in the plane.

He nodded, but he tilted his head a bit, “Well, not just books. I’m a passionate person for a lot of things. You’ll be surprised,” he grinned.

You slowly nodded at his response as you stood up from your seat, realizing that you may have overstayed. “I should be going now. Your other customers might need tables and I didn’t move up earlier because nobody would’ve watched over your food,” you joked as he laughed, knowing that you didn’t have to. He could’ve always cleared the table for other customers and placed his food in the kitchen.

“Nonsense!” He shook his head, grabbing your wrist with a smile on his face. “Well, unless, of course, you have work today?”

It was your turn to shake your head.

“Well then, since I owe you a favor for watching over my food. Why don’t I bring you to my favorite places in Daegu?” He offered.

You checked the time on your phone and realized that you probably didn’t need to go back to office anymore. While you wanted to do a great job in fixing up Yoongi’s conglomerate (because it was your job, duh), it didn’t mean that you had to be in the office the whole time. You gave a thumbs up to Jin’s offer, making him pump his fist into the air, as if it were some sort of victory for him. You laughed at his antics as he went to leave some instructions to the person left in-charge before the two of you started to walk to his car.

“Well then, this is my car. It’s a bit small and old, but I trust you that we won’t break down in the middle of a highway,” he promise you as he opened his old Elantra.

“What are you saying, Jin? It’s okay. You don’t even have to do this,” you grinned to yourself as you went inside the car and placed on the seatbelt.

“Of course, I do!” He insisted in a tone that it even seemed that he was insulted. “You protected my food from the evil flies of doom and also the germs that would’ve contaminated if it weren’t for you, oh mighty one!”

You laughed at his words before he turned on the engine of his car, driving to a familiar direction you’ve always known since you were a child. You felt a bit excited, realizing that Jin was taking you to that lake that you’ve always gone to whenever you wanted to vent out your emotions, hang out with friends, or just walk around when you feel like everything was just in slow motion.

But then, you realized that it wasn’t this big before.

“This is Suseong Lake. It’s a well-known tourist spot here, and well, I feel like you’d be the type who would enjoy it here,” Jin pointed to the big stone that was supposed to signify that you were already nearby the lake.

“What do you mean by ‘I seem to be the type who would enjoy it here’? Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” You quizzed, raising an eyebrow.

Jin chuckled, “It’s a good thing. This place is actually my favorite place here in Daegu.”

“And what does that exactly imply?” You decided to push the question.

“Don’t you like it when people like the same thing that you do?” He asked in return.

“Well, some people get possessive over the things that they like.”

He clicked his tongue twice. “I’m not one of them. Besides, see! You gained a friend in Daegu because we liked the same book! I mean, what are the chances, of course? But, shouldn’t be a good thing?” He exclaimed.

“So, we’re friends now?” You decided to tease him as he was obviously flabbergasted, judging by the look on his face. You laughed at his reaction as you saw him roll his eyes. “Okay, so, fine, yes, we’re friends,” you relented, after seeing the pout that was starting to appear on his face.

He was still pouting, however. “That sounds so forced.”

“We are friends, okay? I mean, I trusted you when I got inside that car, not knowing if I was going to end up chopped up, but I took that leap of faith,” you tried to persuade him as he still shook his head, not giving in to what you were saying. You sighed, “okay, what would make you believe me?”

“Meet me once in a while here, let’s say twice a week?”

You could only stare at him, shocked by the condition he gave you. You could see him trying to act as if he was angry, but you could only laugh at how petty he was being. You couldn’t believe that this guy was probably around your age. You were tempted to snort, but you knew better than to make him increase his condition of meeting in this lake to thrice a week.

“Do I look like I have a choice?” You couldn’t help yourself from saying that, at least.

He shook his head in response, the fake pout still present on his face. All it ever did, though, was to emphasize his lips that were already pouty by default. You tried to stifle your laughter at the thought that if he was going to pout a lot more, then he was probably going to end up making the infamous duck face.

“What can I say? I must be very convincing,” he winked as you cleared your throat, finally recovering from the silly idea of Jin making a duck face.

“More like forceful.” This time, it was your time to click your tongue twice. “I can’t believe that this is how you force friendships on people. You make them feel like they owe you and then you make them feel guilty.” His jaw literally drops as he tries to find the words to retort to you, but you continued before he could even say a thing in his defense.

“Poor me, forced to stay here in Daegu for a while, but the first friend I ever get here in Daegu is someone who conned me into a friendship. The next thing I’ll know, I’m conned into a pyramid scheme for jade mats,” you gave a sigh at the last part for an effect.

“Hey!” He tried to defend himself. “I’m not that kind of person!”

You decided to walk away from him as he tried to keep up with you, still trying to find the words to retort back to him.

“I don’t con people. I’m 100% clean, okay?” He continued, but you shook your head, seemingly unconvinced by what he was saying, though you were really just playing with him.

He had to get his own medicine, too, once in a while.

“I don’t know, Jin. I mean, I don’t even know your complete name. Such a poor girl I am. It’s my first time in Daegu and I get conned by some guy,” you gave another sigh as you didn’t even bother to stop walking. He tried to match up to your pace once again as he scratched his head.

“Look, if you want to know my complete name, well, it’s Kim-”

“Omo, is this the young girl who used to bother me for my sweet potatoes?”

You turned around and saw an elderly woman, whom you knew was one of your neighbors when your family was still staying in Daegu. You grinned in recognition as you went near her and gave her a hug.

“Mrs. Ko! It’s great to see you again!” You burst out as she returned the hug that you gave her.

“I can’t believe that you’re a grown up now! You looked exactly like your mother when she was your age, which is pretty weird because you always looked like your father when you were young!” She exclaimed as you chuckled, a blush making its way on your cheeks as you murmured a small ‘thanks’.

The two of you continued to talk, catching up, especially since you haven’t seen each other for a decade or so. She was a neighbor of your family, who used to sell sweet potatoes in the nearby park in your neighborhood. However, since you were always on a tight budgeted allowance, you would bug her to give you a discount, to which she would spoil you with free sweet potatoes. In return, you would help her close her stall at the end of the day since it was the least thing you could do for the woman who gave you your favorite snacks for free. 

It didn’t take long for the two of you to part ways, however, since she still had to meet with her son who was in town. Said son was already living in Seoul with a family of his own. You bade her good-bye as you took note that you were going to have to give her contact details to your parents, especially since you knew that your parents missed the old woman.

“So, your ‘first time in Daegu’, huh?”

You turned around and saw Jin with an amused look on his face. You blushed for a moment, caught in the act since you knew that you unintentionally withheld that information from him. “Well, it’s my first time in Daegu in a decade,” you grinned as he shook his head in disbelief. “But, hey, you were the one who was conning me to meet with you here twice a week by guilt-tripping me,” you reminded him.

He sighed. “Okay, fine, we’re fair now.”

“Nope,” you shook your head as he raised an eyebrow, “I have a job, remember? Make that once a week.”

“…”

“Jin!” You whined.

“Fine,” he relented, turning to you. “Earlier, I did that just because I didn’t want you to get cooped up with too much work and it would be such a shame if you couldn’t see the beauty of Daegu,” he explained, scratching his head as he motioned you to the view of the trees across the lake. “Even if I go here a couple of times in a week, I still get astonished by its beauty, you know,” he admitted, looking at the lake and its surrounding trees.

You smiled, joining him by his side. “Tell me about it. This place still surprises me, even when I was still in middle school,” you reminisced as you remembered how the lake wasn’t exactly formed like this back when you were younger. There were less trees, the surroundings weren’t this developed just yet, there were a fewer number of duck paddles, you chuckled.

“So, what were you like back in middle school?” He asked, a hint of curiosity in his tone.

You frowned as you remembered the person whom you’ve always wanted to ride a duck paddle with, but you just could never ride one, because there was always none available whenever you visited with him.

“There’s always a next time, you know,” Yoongi would tell you every single time.

But, it never happened.

“Are you okay?” Jin asked, interrupting you from your thoughts.

You nodded as the two of you continued to walk until you reached a familiar location in the park, a smile making its way to your face. “I can’t believe that they still have these here,” you mused as you looked at each lock hung on the safety lines. “How many locks are here, I wonder? Wouldn’t the safety lines give way if there’s too much?” You asked as he tried to rack up his brain, scrunching his eyebrows.

“I think they take off the locks once there’s too many. I think they’ve done it a couple of times already, if i’m not wrong,” he spilled.

You turned to him with a frown, “but it’s such a waste, though?”

“Well, it’s a waste, but it’s still a safety line and it has to do its job,” he seemed like he was trying to convince himself, but you also understood what he was getting at. There was a necessity for the locks to be removed. A phone rang into the air as Jin excused himself for a moment, walking away to answer the phone. You nodded back, understanding that it was urgent.

You brought yourself to look once again at the locks placed on the safety line as the memories of your youth came back running to you yet again. Maybe because you, yourself, had also placed one here with Yoongi years back.

It was during your last visit in the lake when he handed you a lock of your favorite color with the words ‘this idiot x that idiot’ labeled on them. You remembered hitting him lightly on the shoulder when you read those exact words on the lock, expecting that he might’ve written more eloquent words since he was always the more eloquent one between the two of you. But, you knew in the back of your head that he didn’t want you to cry during your last time together.

Suddenly, you wished that your first love was preserved back to the way it was more than a decade ago. But, it was useless because you’ve already met him as he was now and you’ve realized the difference between the Yoongi from the present and the Yoongi you once knew. The Yoongi at that time wouldn’t have cheated on his wife. The Yoongi at that time would’ve come clean about marrying someone else when the two of you first met. The Yoongi at that time would’ve probably introduced you to his wife, without any feeling of guilt. You sighed, wondering if there was any use to reminiscing a few things, though you seemed to remember something.

At that time when you both placed the lock on the safety line so many years ago, the two of you decided to count the number of steps you would make from a certain plank to where the two of you placed the lock. The fifteen-year-old Yoongi said that it was so that he wouldn’t forget where he placed it and that the two of you could go back and look at it when you came back for good. The fifteen-year-old you reluctantly agreed to him.

You smiled to yourself, wondering if you could still remember the sequence, even if it was something that happened so many years ago. You immediately walked to the plank that you remembered was the mark that the two of you made as you started to walk towards the safety line.

Two steps forward

Three steps to the right.

Three steps diagonally to the right.

And yet, what you saw in front of you made you weak in the knees because there was a lock of the same color with the exact same words that he wrote more than a decade ago. You swallowed the growing lump on your throat as you remembered that the locks were regularly taken out to avoid overcrowding and for the safety lines to actually do their jobs.

But, there was a lock with the words he wrote more than a decade ago. You didn’t have to think twice to realize that he would return here to place a replica of the lock that the two of you placed more than a decade ago, especially since the color of the lock was not yet that faded.

“I’ve always loved you, even if we never saw each other for more than a decade.”

You remembered Yoongi’s words on the note that he left the morning after.

What if it was true? What if he always did love you all this time?

But, it still didn’t change the fact that he was married. It still didn’t change the fact that he cheated on his wife. It didn’t change the fact that he was an adulterer, a cheater. If he did love you, why would he marry someone else then?

Those thoughts went through your mind during the entire ride going back to the restaurant. Jin had to go back because there was an emergency since a group of thirty people came in and, obviously, he had to help out his employees there, with one of the waitresses away. You simply nodded, telling him that you could just walk to your apartment from the restaurant since it was nearby.

Fortunately, there was hardly any conversation between you and Jin in the car since he was frequently flocked with different calls, that it made you wonder why he was so busy when he was just an owner of a small restaurant. You decided not to pry, though, especially since you wouldn’t know what to respond if he would ask you about the job you were doing in Daegu.

“Thank you so much, Jin,” you tried to smile as he nodded, but he suddenly decided to ruffle your hair. “Hey!” You complained as you tried to shake off his hands away from your hair, walking away from him. Pouting, you turned back to him, only to see a sad smile on his face.

“I hope you’ll feel better soon,” he said sincerely.

Was it obvious that something was bothering you the whole time?

“It’s weird because it’s still our second time meeting each other, but I guess it’s pretty natural to wish others well,” he laughed as you nodded, unsure on what to tell him. He waved good-bye to you as he went inside his restaurant. You started to walk towards your apartment, but you decided to take a small detour, going to the old park you’ve frequented when you were younger.

It was the same park where Mrs. Ko would sell her sweet potatoes, the same park where you grew up with your siblings, the same park you would pass by, at least, twice a day when you were on the way to school and when you were about to go home, and the very same park where you told Yoongi that your family was going to leave Daegu.

“We’re going to transfer cities,” you told him, while the two of you were sitting on the two swings, watching the sunset. It was already eight in the evening, but you told your parents that you had to drop the bomb to Yoongi.

“It’s reachable by train, right?” He asked in a matter of fact tone.

“Reachable by planes,” you corrected him.

“Ah, I see.”

The two of you strangely became quiet, unsure on what else to say. At the same time, you were afraid of looking at his direction, because you knew that the tears that you tried to hold in since the day your parents told you about your father’s transfer, would fall right there and then. Because even if you knew that your parents had a legitimate reason tor transferring to another country, you didn’t know how you were going to say good-bye to Yoongi.

“I’ll go home now. It’s getting late,” you told him as you immediately stood up from the swing, running to the direction of your house, not bothering to wait for his response. You were honestly scared. You didn’t want to hear what he was going to tell you.

Because you were always a coward.

You always had been one.

You paused on your tracks as you finally arrived to your apartment. But, what surprised you was the presence of a drunk Yoongi, who was sitting right outside of your door, obviously waiting for you. He probably passed out while waiting, since he didn’t get up when you went outside the elevator.

“Sweetie, Yoongi’s here,” your mother knocked on your door as you stopped on writing the report that was still due the following week, but because you wanted to divert your attention to something else, you decided to finish that report.

“Tell him that I’m asleep or something,” you replied to your mother. However, she didn’t respond. “Mom, just tell him that- oh,” you turned around, surprised to see Yoongi by your door. It was weird that your parents would let him up at such a time, but they probably figured out what was happening because you barely even touched the food on your plate during supper.

“I didn’t know what to say,” he admitted.

“You could always try some sarcastic snort or something like you always do,” you responded, looking down. He walked closer to you until he was standing right in front of you. It seemed so weird because you knew that you were always taller than him, but now, he was around your height already. You didn’t even realize this difference when you were close to him, what more when you were away from him?

You heard him swallow the growing lump on his throat. “I don’t have the words to say. I can’t say that I would follow you because we both know that my parents would throw a fit, but I also can’t ask you to stay behind because that would be too selfish of me,” he explained.

You could only nod because you knew that what he said was true. But, somehow, you wanted him to still say those words, even when the two of you knew it was impossible and unreasonable. The tears that you’ve always tried to hold back finally fell down your cheeks as you felt him pull you into a tight embrace, your cries becoming more prominent as he simply patted you on your back.

“I’ll write a letter to you everyday. I’ll make sure you’ll never feel like we’ve been separated,” he promised, hugging you tighter, since the two of you both knew that the day you were going to leave was just hanging around your shoulders, haunting the two of you every single moment.

Yoongi woke up to the sound of your door opening after you placed the right code, but you didn’t mind him, preferring to just go inside your apartment since you didn’t want to deal with him. A part of you wondered if you should call the security guards for letting him inside when he wasn’t even supposed to be here. You sighed to yourself as you quickly opened a can of beer from your fridge. You took a quick gulp, but you only choked when you heard the door to your apartment open.

How did he know the password to your door?

You placed down your beer, quickly walking towards your entrance, as you saw him, barely standing and holding on to the wall for support. He was staring at you, a somber expression on his face, “Are you going to say that you’re asleep now?” He asked, reminding you of the same thing you did before.

You frowned as you folded your arms across your chest. “What do you want, CEO Min? It’s already past five,” you sneered.

You saw his fists on a tight grip as he clenched his eyes, frustration seeping through his entire self. “I need to tell you something,” he begged.

You closed your eyes, finding the will inside of you to not burst out in anger towards him. Even after everything, you still needed to maintain a professional relationship with him. “I’m pretty sure that what you’re supposed to tell me now could be said tomorrow in your office,” you commented as you motioned for him to leave.

“Are you sure you want Jung Hoseok to hear that it was always you and there was nobody else?” He challenged you as you gripped your arms, trying to be patient. “I’ve always loved you. I never stopped, not for a single moment. If you only knew how much it hurt me on that afternoon that you told me you were leaving, if you only knew how hard it was for me to breathe when the person I could always breathe around was leaving me for an indefinite period,” he looked at you, his voice hoarse from drinking too much, but his eyes never wavering away from looking at yours directly.

“If you only knew how hard it was for me to continue living when the person who could only make my heart beat was leaving me.”

“Then, why did you stop writing me letters? Why did you stop communicating with me? Why did you stop?”

You couldn’t bear staying silent anymore as you felt your tears stream down your cheeks. Why was he always able to break down your walls and make you cry?

“Why did you have to be married? Why couldn’t you wait for me? Why do you have to keep on replacing that stupid lock in Suseong Lake? Why do you have to be this way, Yoongi? Why do you have to be a fucking paradox?”

He gave an obnoxious chuckle, “So, you’ve been there?”

You frowned, holding your left temple. “That’s not the point, Yoongi. But, the thing is that you’re married. You married someone else, while I was away. You’re bound to someone for life and I don’t plan to be the third party in such a sacred relationship,” you stood on your ground as you took a swig from the can you placed down, feeling the sudden need for more alcohol.

Yoongi, however, snorted. “If it were even a sacred relationship. It can’t be described sacred, and you can’t even call it a relationship,” he muttered, looking away from you, scratching his head. “You know what? Screw it, I’m gonna tell you this. My wife and I, she and I made a deal before we got married. We were going to divorce after two years, just so that I can grant her the freedom she always wanted from her family,” he admitted as you choked on your beer, making you cough lightly. You turned back to him, wondering if what he said was a joke.

But, the serious look he had on his face made you realize it wasn’t a joke.

“Their company was in trouble, mine was, too. And so, we had that merger to help both companies since it would eliminate a direct competitor. At the same time, her father wanted assurance that my company wouldn’t just swallow their company without their family having some hold in it, thus, the marriage,” he explained, scratching his head. “But, my wife and I made a deal that we would get divorced after two years, irreconcilable differences. We just have to appear as husband and wife outside, but we barely talk to each other at home. She’s actually always away, I don’t even know where she goes, to be honest,” he added, a hesitating look on his face as you coerced him to say what he was hesitant about.

He took a deep breath before turning to you, an unreadable expression on his face. “To be honest, I’ve never even touched her or had sex with her, if that is what you must know,” he concluded as you blinked your eyes, quite surprised with what he admitted.

To be honest, a part of you wanted to believe what he said. Everything that he said actually fit into the whole narrative. A CEO of a conglomerate suddenly marries a woman from the family who owned the corporation that was recently merged with one of the corporations under his conglomerate. They decide to divorce after two years since the woman always wanted her freedom.

“So, how long?”

“Huh?”

“How long do you have until you’ll divorce her? How long must I wait, Yoongi?” You asked him. A part of you feels crazy for even considering to wait for him, but that was what love did to you.

It made you crazy, stupid, and reckless. But, you know it was always worth it all for him.

“Less than a year to go,” he mentally calculated as he scratched his head. “That time in Jeju when we met, that was supposedly our anniversary holiday, but I never even saw her the whole time there until the last day since our parents flew in to Jeju.”

You slowly nodded, his excuse making sense for what you saw in Jeju. He was always with you the whole day for two straight days, except on the Saturday you saw him with his wife. If his wife even cared, he would’ve gotten calls from her, but strangely, there was none.

“But, you don’t have to wait, you know,” he said, walking nearer to you as you turned to him, a surprised look on your face. He caressed your face, his face inching closer to yours. “You could always have me. I’ve always been yours. I’m all yours to take.”

You didn’t know who made the first move, but the next thing you knew, your lips were moving against his, savoring the taste of each other’s kisses as if it were the first time all over again. You felt your tears stream down your cheek, a feeling of bittersweetness coming as each second passed. Maybe, it was the fact that you knew everything about his situation now and it made it all the more sweeter and bitter, at the same time.

You slowly took off his coat and his dress suit, his lips never leaving yours. It seemed as if he was afraid that if his lips left yours, you would disappear forever. You could feel the grip he had on your waist, feeling the desperation he must have always felt since you left him at the age of 15, and the feat of forever losing you when you thought that he had betrayed you.

You should’ve always known that the world was not black and white, there was always certain things that fell on the gray side, and he was one of them.

The two of you moved to your bedroom as you slipped out of your blue dress, revealing the black lingerie that you were wearing underneath. It wasn’t on purpose, but the smirk he had on his face as he stared at you made you feel that you didn’t make a mistake. “You are definitely going to be the death of me,” he murmured in between his kisses, his lips slowly making its way down your neck.

You felt him lower you down on the bed, his figure towering over yours as he continued to smother you with kisses, making you smile from the feeling that he was closer than ever to you. Your bodies continued to move against each other, him slipping off his remaining clothes and you, taking off your lingerie, while he continued looking at you as if you were divinely beautiful. You could only blush at the way he was staring at you, but he immediately lunged into you, sucking on your nipples that only seemed to heighten the euphoria you were feeling at the moment. But, you knew that you only felt this high because you were with the man you love.

If only this could happen for the rest of your days.

“I love you so much. It’s always been you. I don’t think I’ve ever stopped loving you since we were young,” he confessed to you, feeling him steady himself right outside your entrance. You gave a nod, motioning for him to thrust inside you as you mewled from the pleasure of him filling you up until he was fully-inside you. You felt the need to adjust to his side again as he waited for you patiently, just like he did the last time. You gave him a nod as a signal for him to start moving.

“Yoongi!” You panted as he started moving against you, his length stretching your insides with every thrust that he made against you, his lips finding yours again to engulf and kiss deeply, hoping that you would feel his true, unwavering feelings for you. You were the only one he wanted to be with since he was fifteen and maybe, even before he knew what love was.

That was why you were the only woman he ever made love to.

“Yoongi, I’m close!” You cried, your climax approaching you as you felt yourself feeling higher, the euphoria from the way he continued to move harder against you, his fingers finding their way to your clit, rubbing it until you saw a blinding light, your climax finally washing through your whole body. You continued to moan as he continued to thrust through your high. It did’t take a while when you felt his thrusts becoming more sloppier and faster, before he finished inside you, his cum slightly oozing down your thighs. He rested his forehead against yours, panting after what just took place.

You turned to him, an endearing look on your face as you finally made your decision.

“I love you, too, Yoongi.”

Mind over matters of the heart.