#yipiiii

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It all started with certain wedding that went wrong. The bride to be, Susan was hit by a meteor that turned her into a giant lady.

Susan woke up in an unknown place, terrified and confused she started assimilating where she was at. She was in a big room and there was a table. A tube from the ceiling dropped some kind of yellow slime and a giant spoon.

While approaching said table, she heard some strange sounds around, which only added to her fear. Finally she saw something peeping from behind the strange gelatine in the table.

It looked like a very big cockroach but with some humanoid features. The insect came out from his hide, looking curious.

He finally spoke "Hello" He was cut out by Susan's scream. The girl already overtaken by fear, proceeded attempting to smash the insect with the spoon.

The monster tried to explain himself "Madam!!" Susan started swinging her spoons as a weapon "Will you stop?!" The insect asked as he was attached to the spoon "MADAM PLEASE". Susan kept hitting the insect with the spoon while he tried to reason with her. "Will-" *smash* "you-" *smash* "stop!-".

With one final blow, Susan left him senseless in the table.

The cockroach twitched his body slightly and while trying to maintain balance he said "Whatever mad scientist made you, he really went all out" after that, he finally collapsed on the surface.

"This is not happening" Susan whispered to herself. Meanwhile, the girl stepped on a blue substance with one eye that's talked to the woman "Hi".

The blue goo was thrown to the table where the cockroach had already straightened himself.

"My back!! You broke my back!! Just kidding I don't have a back " The liquid/solid creature said jokingly.

The cockroach, looking unamused responded " forgive him, but as you can see, he has no brain"

Turns out you don't need one, completely overrated. As a matter of fact I don't even *wheezes* I forgot how to breath. I don't know how to breath" *wheezes*.

Rolling his eyes up, his companion responded "suck in BOB" the doctor looked like he was stored of reminding him this.

'BOB' did as he was told and seemed to be finally able to breath " This guy's a life safer".

Suddenly, something green and scally landed in front of Susan grabbing her by her face.

"Wow, look at you. I know what you're thinking. First day in prison and you want to take down the toughest in the yard. Well, I'd like to see you try" said a fish like monster .

He started doing some kind of martial arts movements? Well, at least until his back cracked and he fell to the floor muttering. He recovered almost immediately and said smugly "look, she's speechless".

The other two individuals went to the floor as well

"Wait, did you say she??" BOB asked, who was quickly answered by the Dr "yes BOB, we are in the rare presence of a female monster"

"And a giant one that's for sure" an unknown voice said right next to the doctor, startling him.

The doctor jumped slightly in his place as he quickly recognised the owner of that voice.

The person who just made themselves known was a human. At least it appeared to be one to Susan. They dressed formally but wearing messy hair and a pair of eye bags. Nonetheless, the sly smile on their lips showed their satisfaction for frightening momentarily the Cockroach.

"Oh! This is (Y/N). They have a habit of scaring the living daylights out of everyone here!" He said while glaring daggers at the only human in the room.

"A human!!" Susan asked alarmed "Thank god, what is happening what is this place"

"Well, first of all, welcome to your new home, or prison as my boss insist" the person started approaching them with confidence. "Darling, you are now property of the government, you were before but now it's more noticeable for you" a little laugh came after that statement.

"I'm here to help you assimilate this unfortunate situation just as your other companions here did" Said Y/N trying to explain to the new recruit their new situation. Susan looked like she wasn't listening, as if she was in trance.

The monster were as if they were debating trying to make a good impression on the new one and commenting on what kind of monster they wanted her to be. Meanwhile the only human there intervened in the debate as well.

Finally, they all turned their attention to the giant woman in the room and Dr cockroach asked her "might we ask your name, madam?" A soulsess "Susan" was the only answer he receive from her.

"No, no we mean like, your monster name. What do people scream when they see you coming" BOB explained " like: LOOK OUT, HERE COMES..." he left the sentence unfinished so she could do so. He was met with the same answer as before.

"Really?" The bug man said looking back at their human companion. Y/N nod their head "Her name is Susan but as far as I'm aware the government has renamed her as Ginormica" she said stepping closer to the insect looking at the notes he was making.

Headcannons:

You've been there long enough to know the majority of area-fifty something employees.

You got along with the monster pretty quick since you were curious about them and they were lonely enough to appreciate the company.

When the invisible men died, Dr cockroach, Link, General Monger and you made a silent pact of not telling BOB about it. Eventually once he started asking for the whereabouts of the monster, you told him that he manages to escape and the rest of the monster just went along with it.

At your first few years on the job, you also acted as a part time assistant for Monger. He basically treats you like a kid since he's much older than you but trust you enough. He knows your trustworthy.

Monger let's you go on the passenger seat of that car he moves with inside the facility.

Dr cockroach was very pleased when he found out that you wanted to know about his experiments and how invested you seemed in his explanations. That made you develope a quick but firm friendship with the doctor.

We all know that Link cheats with the help of Insectosaurus when playing cards. BOB is painfully unaware of that fact. You still play with him though.

Once you catched on how he was constantly winning (which wasn't difficult) you learned how to use your own tricks. This made Link competitive so he started developing new ways to cheat (now it's a vicious cicle)

BOB is just happy to have s new friend and just as the other two, you indulge him in whatever he wants to do. Playing catch the ball with his eye is funnier than expected.

Susan was relieved to see you in between the freak show that is area fifty-something. You became her sanity very quickly until she regained her own confidence.

Girl nights are now a must. BOB is sometimes included in them.

This is all for now!!!! I think this movie is really underrated and I've also been watching the series and it's not that bad. A lot of jokes are hilarious and the dynamics are pretty cool.

I will be making more headcannons or one shots. If someone wants an specific one, please ask. Love you guys 😘😘

Graduation night was all about going wild, sucking all the marrow out of life for one last time, unapologetically, not a care in the world about the guilt and the sin that such a relentless night would inevitably entail. They say that these are the best years of your life, but how exactly? How is a suffocating little town like this, bland and one-dimensional, even after enduring the onslaughts of the very apocalypse, the best that things would ever get? Mike didn’t want to believe that. But there’s a difference between wanting and knowing something for sure.

Want is but a flimsy thing, carefully monitored by the anxieties, the urgensies of fantasy and imagination. Want could be based on a lie, hidden from the world forever, and nobody would have to know, for want is never truly clear and never truly steady. It’s an ever-changing current, a tide, calculated, sure to change forms, and yet- and yet nothing can ever be the same again. Want, mother of yearning and desire, daughter of disappointment. She’s but a flimsy thing, and Mike’s first ever unrequited love.

Knowing, though, is tricky. Sophisticated and steady, something meant to be trusted. Something that doesn’t encourage or hide, something that prides itself in its way of squashing poor, weak humans and their silly aspirations. She’s a fearsome thing to behold, a god meant to be worshipped by everyone- everyone but lovers.

And where wanting and knowing collide, a celestial event is born. Interstellar, a war between the stars abiding the realm of knowledge, where billions of signals unite to result in a secret movement. The center of everything, that which humans rely on to call themselves able to do anything at all. But, see, in order for this universe to exist and thus assist mankind, it must first rely on the workings of another, equally strange and eclectic cosmos. Sweet home of Chaos and birth-giver of life. Of odd shapes and pools of crimson, that which the body couldn’t function without.

Knowing without wanting….what a peculiar way of understanding the universe.

Nothing really mattered, though. They still had the chance to be kids, just for one day, just this one, last day. And fuck it, cliches or not. Whomever thought of such a thing? Everyone’s just as stupid for the same few sinful desires. Purity is but an idealization of reality, but only because its meaning is a thing tainted by the beliefs of the elders. What an illogical world, this is.

Mike grabs the large bottle of champagne from the kitchen counter and finds his way towards the school that would soon be nothing more but a biter(sweet) memory. Who really cares, though? If anything is meant to last, it will. School was always meant to end but this- he can have this. And not just for one day.

He finds the familiar face of the boy he’d abandoned a whole universe for, uncaring of the upcoming unbalance. But of course- he should have seen this coming. That nothing would ever feel off, that even though he’d let go of something the world had deemed as vital, his voice never once faltered at the face of this new universe before him. It feels as if- all the missing pieces could be found in the wanting in Mike’s heart, and the knowing in Will’s head. It doesn’t really make any logical sense, but whomever spoke of logic?

Will uncorkes the bottle of champagne, a soft pop breaking the deafening midnight silence, and they take turns sipping at the funny, bubbling liquid. They are all soft touches and widening grins, lethargic, lazy movements and drunk laughter. It is a teenage dream, and no sin could ever taint that.

“Can I tell you something? ,” Mike whispers into the night, shifting his body a little closer to the boy next to him.

“Sure ,” Will’s voice echoes, a sweet melody to Mike’s ears. He smells of alchohol and something sweet and syrup-y, something fresh, something that reminds Mike of home.

“You know how sometimes you feel like you know something but don’t have the words to describe it?,” Mike asks, Will’s infinitesimal nod urging him to go on. “Well, I’m pretty sure I’ve known this thing forever, ever since I began to realise what having a concience meant, or like- began to just think for myslef. And I know that words are pretty and they confirm and seal things, but they are not enough, you know? But like- neither are actions. Actions without words- they are like when you solve an equation without ever understanding how you got there. Actions without words- i dont really like them, because yeah sure you can do things but I care about what you’re thinking and feeling, your whys are so very important, always. But also- I feel like promises, they should be something that lasts, not just something hovering in the air between two people, right? Because then you can just lie afterwards and call the other person crazy and get away with things. What I’ve been meaning to say is-” out of breath, Mike dares to look the beautiful boy next to him in the eyes, finally met with those hazel gems he’d give his own life for.

“Here.”

Mike bends his body to the side and picks up a few leaves and branches. He snaps one of them in half and gently takes Will’s palm in his.

“May I?”, he asks, ever so gentle. Will’s awe-struck, pink-tigned face, a soft and genuine answer.

Mike twirls the small branch around the boy’s ring finger, making a small but tight knot, reveling at the strange beauty of Will’s soft finger encircled by the almost thorny branch.

“Can I-”, before Will has time to finish his question, Mike’s respective palm in laid before him, a small chuckle escaping his lips, his eyes lighting up the entire night sky.

And palm to palm, is holy palmers’ kiss.

An artist’s fingers, sealing a promise with a knot, and thus bringing soft lips to the poet’s palm.

A secret, two perfectly aligned universes, the artist and the poet-

And here's the original thing!