#yearender

I was one of the lucky ones, still employed living under the roof i can say complete and healthy family up to the extended family members no one I knew personally died hopefully theres none at all. struggling to pay bills and other monetary responsibilities for quite sometime, struggled with the new normal requirements, but we get by i get by until we were caught up in this day. the way i see it theres no nothing yet no light were nowhere near at the end of this tunnel but im hopeful, i need to be hopeful somehow.

this year has bestes my mental capacity it was whack i was so angry i was so angry that i clench my teeth so hard it would fall out, bang every gate bigger than me, literally i couldnt sleep at night because the amount of anxiety and pressure is so tremendous, im drowning in it. i almost admitted myself to seek professional help but didnt managed to push thru but i wish i could i really want to know.

in solidarity, i realized i was running away with my issues, i never once got in contact with my monsters so i go out and try to avoid them until its okay again to go in. i really anchored my mindset with doing various activities that involves myself being outside so i get to live another happy day but i was stuck inside so here i am bombarded with a lot of nasty monsters i tries to kept hidden.

i also got into watching boys love series, gained new perspective on how i view and think things through, i think i got more empathetic and understanding, as much as i hate it i was resilient, will power is still intact even when i thought im losing myself.

but i was blessed with people who loves me cares for me, it was not hard but i did pull thru sometimes i track my mood record to see how i got mad and what triggers it right now i forgot when was the last time i had a major breakdown. im anticipating when will that manifest again i have this mentality that if i keep keeping feelings especially of anger bottled up it will explode on my face and just be as destructive as a volcano.

when i started seeing my friends outside, i knew that im going to be okay somehow l. extroverts like me felt like it was a prison not being to go out normally i was really deviant and not welcoming on that part of this entire quarantine it felt like a major part of my personality was kust going out, being outside socializing, errands, with friends etc.

i never wouldve made out this year alive without the love of my life. definitely the best part of this year if i must say. for this shitty ass year its not so bad after all. thank you for everything im grateful i get to spend this year with you.

i really dont want to wish for things but for this #OustDuterte

To dear readers and followers near and far, to my beloved readers on Tumblr, followers on Twitter, and new readers via my facebook fanpage, this 2017 was a year of deepening of our roots, the strengthening of our resolve against the twisting of our national memory, and renewing of our faith in our democracy against those who seek to weaken it further by fake news and propaganda from the powers that be. 

Thank you for liking and reposting my posts!

This will sort of be a beastmode post. The situation calls for it. The year 2018, as many intellectuals are foreseeing, will be a harder year. 

We are at the edge of the precipice, and the call for honor, and the call to stand for what is right has never been harder than it is today. It sounds cliche now to even say “dangal” both in government and in our daily conversations. The romanticizing of our national heroes, or speaking about love for country like an abstract pleasant feel-good feeling must end. These are cheap talk. It sounds good to the ears, but it does nothing. 

We must realize the truth more than ever... that it is in our able hands--Filipino artists, Filipino writers, Filipino dreamers, Filipino government workers, Filipino businessmen, Filipino scientists, Filipino workers, Filipino overseas workers Filipino historians and academicians--it is in OUR hands that the future of our People will be decided.

Long ago, Jose Rizal wrote this words in El Filibusterismo:

Where are the youth who will dedicate their innocence, their idealism, their enthusiasm to the good of the country? Where are they who will give generously of their blood to wash away so much shame, crime and abomination? Pure and immaculate must the victim be for the sacrifice to be acceptable. Where are you, young men and young women, who are to embody in yourselves the life-force that has been drained from our veins, the pure ideals that have grown stained in our minds, the fiery enthusiasm that has been quenched in our hearts? We await you, come for we await you!

When the call is sounded, will we be brave enough to answer it? 

Or will we stand aside, and be silent, as Rizal put them into words: 

“...we see our countrymen feel privately ashamed, hearing the growl of their rebelling and protesting conscience, while in public they keep silent and even join the oppressor in mocking the oppressed...”

Tayo ay mga Pilipino, at hindi tayo mananahimilk. 

May these posts in 2017 inspire you dear reader, to be brave for the hard year ahead. Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions!

Isang mapagpalayang bagong taon, mga kababayan, mula sa isang historyador. 

November ♥ 82: Excitement at the upcoming Gregorio del Pilar biopic!

October ♥ 41: Spain’s Last Stand: An IndioHistorian Review of the film “1898: Los últimos de Filipinas”

September ♥ 84: A look back at Jose “Pete” F. Lacaba, “Kaparis ng Kawayan, Kaparis ng Kalabaw”

August ♥ 234: Southeast Asia before ASEAN: An ASEAN 50 Commemorative Post

July ♥ 302: Applauding Kontra-Gapi

June ♥ 120: Ang Laya Mo’y Babantayan: The History of the patriotic song, Pilipinas Kong Mahal

May ♥ 97: Quijano de Manila: An IndioHistorian Centennial Tribute to Nick Joaquin

April ♥ 80: “Ang Pikon, Talo”: Satire as Impulse to Freedom

March ♥ 133: La Generala Gabriela of Ilocandia

February ♥ 50: Mabini in Steampunk: A Review of Mabining Mandirgma: A Steampunk Musical

January ♥ 1057 : “We are descended from Voyagers”: How Disney’s Moana point to Filipinos’ Distant Past

#1 of 10 Most Popular News Galleries of 2017: Hurricane Irma thrashes the Caribbean

(Originally posted on September 9, 2017)

See the countdown of our most popular galleries of the year!

See the rest of our 2017 Year End features >>>

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Strung like beads along the northeast edge of the Caribbean, the Leeward Islands are tiny, remote and beautiful, with azure waters and ocean breezes drawing tourists from around the world.

The wild isolation that made St. Barts, St. Martin, Anguilla and the Virgin Islands vacation paradises has turned them into cutoff, chaotic nightmares in the wake of Hurricane Irma, which left 22 people dead, mostly in the Leeward Islands. Looting and lawlessness were reported Saturday by both French and Dutch authorities, who were sending in extra troops to restore order.

The Category 5 storm snapped the islands’ fragile links to the outside world with a direct hit early Wednesday, pounding their small airports, decapitating cellphone towers, filling harbors with overturned, crushed boats and leaving thousands of tourists and locals desperate to escape.

The situation worsened Saturday with the passage of Category 4 Hurricane Jose, which shuttered airports and halted emergency boat traffic through the weekend. (AP)

(Photos: Desmond Boylan/AP, Jonathan Drake/Reuters, Helene Valenzuela/AFP/Getty Images)

Photos: Hurricane Irma pounds Florida » Photos: Aerial photos of Hurricane Irma destruction » Photos: Not a beach day in Miami, but the people-watching is fine »

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See the rest of the countdown and our other photo galleries on Yahoo News.

#6 of 10 Most Popular News Galleries of 2017: In memoriam: Remembering the notable figures we lost in 2016.

The countdown of photo galleries that our Yahoo readers liked the best this year! Check back in as we’ll be counting down the top 10 until New Year’s Eve.

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See the countdown and our other photo galleries on Yahoo News.

Currently Listening to: America - Only in Your Heart Location: Sydney, Australia Mood: Anxiously Melancholic Welcome to the 18th iteration of my Year Ender post. I have written most of this post on a plane on route to Sydney,Australia. As of posting, I’ll be in Sydney to celebrate the New Year near Sydney Opera.. Anyhow, let’s do the 2024 edition of my year ender report!  

1. The biggest highlight of this year is the approval of my Australian Visa and my big move from Dubai, UAE to Canberra, Australia. I was quite surprised that I was expecting my visa to be approved by March this year, but it was approved even earlier around February. Everything went quite quick then. I had a vacation in the Philippines in April, resigned at my job in Dubai in May, moved to Australia in June and finally settled in Canberra by the end of July. Two years of efforts and expeses paid off, and I was quite pleased that I got it. 

2. Travel wise, I definitely went to a lot of places! I went first to Oman in January, has a vacation in the Philippines in April, went to Georgia and Armenia in May, took a 2 week stopover in Singapore before finally flying first to Melbourne at the end of June. I stayed at my cousin’s place for a month to soak in the Australian life before finally moving on my own to Canberra by end of July. I also travelled to Sydney and visited Melbourne again a few more times. I am hoping that by next year, I can finally buy a good e-bike and start of camping around the Canberra area. I also hope to travel to more places, though it’s a bit hard with how far Australia is with everything else. Let’s see what’s in store this coming year! 3. I wouldn’t say that my move to Australia was all rainbows and sunshine. I felt that this year I’m beset by feelings of loneliness and anxiety. I think the biggest challenge for me coming to Australia would be getting used to the cost of living. I found it quite steep to my liking that sometimes at the back of my mind I wonder if relocating to Australia was actually a good idea. I’m also having some challenges with looking for friends. Australians are generally cool people, but sometimes I’m not sure how to interact with them. I am able to communicate and get along with them for the most part, but I’m wondering if I can befriend them to the point of being close to them. I guess only time will tell if I can have really close friends. I was also burned out with a lot of unexpected expenses, like dental and medical expenses which I’ll explain in a bit. I’m quite concerned that there are times where my expenses ate into my savings which I really didn’t like. I was nervous that it was taking me a while to get a job as my savings were getting depleted quite fast. Thankfully after a bit more than a month, I was able to find a job.

4. I guess I must be seen as complaining a bit too much, as while the cost of living is high in Australia, there’s a lot of good things going for it. First of all, the environment is really pristine and peaceful, especially in Canberra. It took me a bit of getting used to, since I was used to cities like Singapore and Dubai where it’s so busy and crowded, but now I got used to the quiet and spacious atmosphere of Canberra. I am also very glad that I was able to get a job as a Content Producer for YWCA Canberra. I feel the job is quite fulfilling, as my role serves a higher purpose of doing advocacy work and righteoous causes, a stark contrast to my previous jobs which is all about selling products. It also helps that the work culture is so chill and not stressful compared to my previous jobs. My colleagues seem to have a positive opinion of me as well, which makes me like my job a lot. I do need a bit of adjustment with other things, but I believe I’ll stay with this orginasation for quite a while!

5. TCG wise, it was pretty much the same deal as last year where it started great but ended quite bad. I had a good start with our team getting top 8 in Springfest in Manila. I also started playing in Australia, and I had a really good experience with a big tournament called Saltfest, where I got 4th place, probably my best record in a singles tournament format so far. Unfortunately my Melbourne BCS run ended short and my Singapore BCS run was even a disaster. I was quite envious of my friend Eman who got top 4 not once, but twice. Hopefully though, there’s one to two chances of still qualifying for Worlds this coming February, so I hope to learn from my mistakes and finally get an invite.

By the way, I also started a new TCG named Grand Archive. Enri kinda duped me into playng the game, and my FoW teammate Zhimon also got into it, so I am playing it now. I also got a good placement on the trial deck tournament which gave me a reason to play the game. I have to admit though, the game is quite expensive, and I spent a lot. Let’s see how it goes! Thankfully, the Australian TCG scene is quite active and there are small communities of Weiss Schwarz and Grand Archive in Canberra where I can at least play the card games I prefer. I do want to qualify for WS Worlds soon as I feel the game is kinda in decline and I want to be able to get to my goal before it fully declines.

5. Health wise, I definitely am not healthy. I believe a big part of this stems from my anxieties, which caused me not to do exercise and proper diet. I did try to do jogging and order a food subscription service to improve my diet, but I have not been consistent. It didn’t help that the farewell party in Dubai has now caused me to get frequent indigestion as it clashed with my diet. Then when I arrived in Australia, I was beset with a toothache that I cannot ignore that I decided to have a root canal. I was in shock with how expensive dental procedures in Australia are. I think the cost hurt me as bad as the toothache as well. I also had cubital tunnel syndrome, where I had issues moving my left ring and pinky finger. It’s better now, though I still fill a very slight numbness on my left hand. I aim that this coming year, I’ll be able to buy a bike to become active and get a cheaper food subscription service where I can order and cook healthier food.   6. My sister was finally able to get out of detention, but a lot of things happened. She can’t go back to work, and worse her fiancee died. Thankfully she was able to recover, and she’s taking care of my niece as much as she could. She hopes to be able to travel so she can work again soon. It’s quite hard since during this period I had to take my share of providing for both my mom and my dad, which doesn’t help with my anxiety. I hope things will be better for her soon enough.

7. Anime, Manga and Pop Culture stuff.

Anime and Manga wise, it’s kinda the same as last year. There were some good gems this year though, and there also some manga series that ended this year. I’m trying to clear some backlogs and I actually just finished an anime in the plane on route to Sydney.

As for sumo, I really don’t watch it as fervently as a few years ago, though I’m still updated with the tournaments every now and then. I think a big reason was that the JSA went overkill with punishing Miyagino Oyakata (Hakuho) for the Hokuseiho debacle, as I felt it reeks of politics. I believe that affected Hakuoho’s performance badly which left me disappointed. New young blood definitely have risen this year though, especially Onosato who is now an Ozeki. There’s also a good chance that this coming year Kotozakura (formerly Kotonowaka) will finally become Yokozuna. We shall see, but I already had a feeling he had a potential to become one. Kinda disappointed though that Kirishima fell down a lot.

Currently Watching:

Spice and Wolf (2024) – Just finished

Planning to Watch: 

Danmachi S5, Apothecary Diaries S2, not sure what else…

Finished This Year:

Kubo-San Won’t Let Me Be Invisible, Isekai Nonbiri Nouka, Frieren: Beyond Journey’s End, Aria the Origination, Flying Witch, Apothecary Diaries S1, Ganbare Douki Chan, Konosuba S3, Dangers in my Heart S2, My Tiny Senpai, Yuru Camp S3, Dungeon Meshi, Makeine, Oshi no Ko S2, Roshidere Rewatched This Year: 

Attack on Titan Series   Unfinished Anime:  

Finished OVA/Movies:

Gundam Seed Freedom, Spy x Family Code White, Seven Days War, Lonely Castle in the Mirror, Kaguya Sama Movie, Belle, Look Back, Overlord: The Sacred Kingdom

New Manga Read:

I barely read manga this year actually…

Finished Manga: Oshi no Ko Other Stuff Watched:

Movies: Interstellar, Sisu, Seven Samurai, In the Mood for Love, Dune Part 2, Oppenheimer

Series: Castlevania Nocturne

New Games Played: Pretty much the same with just the addition of Pokemon Pocket

8. Fulfilled (or not) Wishes a. Get the Australia Visa Grant – Highlight of the year. We got there. b. Improved Health – Not the best, with bouts of anxiety and insomnia. Not being active either. c. WS Worlds Invite – Still in process. There’s still a chance for 1 or 2 events. d. Better situation for my Sis – I believe for the most part these got settled. e. Some new goal to look forward to – I still am not able to find a new goal, I guess the goal now is to become stable in Australia and do the steps to become a PR and eventually a citizen.

New Wishes: 1. Better health – I wish to improve my activity and diet, as well as treat my anxiety and insomnia 2. WS Worlds Invite – I will still try, with two more events

3. Start camping – a big reason why I chose Canberra is that I can do outdoor activities. I hope I can do it this coming year. 4. Settle well in Australia – Hope to find close friends, as well as to get used to the Australian life