#yarntherapy

“I know there's been pain this year, but it's time to let it go Next year, you never know” - Merry Christmas by Ed Sheeran and Elton John

Mostly when we look back during new years we tend to think about this past year; what we've done, what we’ve accomplished and which people we've met (though, there will be some of that here too). In the last few years I've learned that a good fallback is thinking “where was I at the same time last year”, to get the best perspective on what this year's actually been giving you. Like when I celebrated the new year 2016, realising that nothing whatsoever that I’d imagined for 2015 had become what I thought it would when it started. I'd lost friends, community and context, but gained new friends, a job and lots of life lessons. 

When a year ago we turned our clocks into 2024 I just took a deep breath of relief. 2023 was a shit year filled with death, depression, anxiety and sickness. I couldn't wait for it to be over. But it also made me come into 2024 quite humble and not expecting that much. Maybe because of that, it actually turned into quite a good year, with some big and small milestones. I'm standing here, going into 2025 with a very different feeling than a year ago, and that in Itself is actually my greatest success of 2024. 

More than that, 2024 was filled with this:

In the winter and spring I:

Continued having gallstone-attacks, but finally got time for surgery in late april. It all went well and it was a huge weight off my shoulders to be able to eat decent food again. 

Officiated my 100th roller derby game, at the same venue I got an in-game panic attack at just six months earlier, which felt like a comeback in many ways.

Became more and more comfortable in the realisation that I’m heterosexual panromantic, so much that I did a tumblr-post about it, but not so much to be out in public. That's ok.

Got a new job and quit my old one. Even though I liked my old one and was scared about the change, I'd never been this sure about switching jobs before.

Had to experience my parents’ barn burning down to the ground at the blink of an eye. It was terrifying, but could have gone so much worse. 

Except for the usual travelling around Sweden I got to travel to Vienna and Hamburg for friends and derby which was amazing. 

Crocheted a lot, finished some smaller projects and started a big one. 

Made a lot of travel plans for the summer.

In the summer I:

Worked my very last days at my old workplace, which was filled with mixed feelings. Directly started my new one and shortly after went into vacation with a good feeling. 

Went on a two week long train vacation through Germany with my boyfriend. One of the best vacations I've ever had! Highlight was the Schwebebahn in Wuppertal.

Ended summer vacation with friends and family back in Sweden. Then back to start my new job for real in August. 

This fall and winter I:

Finished two crochet projects, thought I finished another one but realised I'd miscalculated and also started another one.

Used the then upcoming season 3 of Heartstopper as a remedy for another slump in my mental health (no, a tv-series is not supposed to be used as the only help for mental health, get help if you need it, I will too, I promise!)

Had a deep talk with two of my best friends about our relationship. I was scared as hell, but it worked out very well. 

Continued the first months of my new job and it's been a whirlwind of goods, bads and inbetweens. 

Continued weaving, finished two rugs and a cloth.

Saw season 3 of Heartstopper for the first time at a hotel room by myself crying while at a conference. It was still one of the best times of my life. 

Listened to **it gets better by Martin Luke Brown on repeat to try to convince myself that's true. 

Watched, and liked, not one but two Marvel-series (WandaVision and Agatha All Along). Sounds like nothing, but this is so far from everything else I watch, so it's really outside my comfort zone. 

Travelled to Finland for the first time, and loved it. 

Travelled to Bergen for the second time and loved it even more.

Generally travelled a lot, mainly for derby officiating, which has been educative, superfun, draining and exhausting, all at once. 

Made a plan to not travel as much in 2025, but I've already broken that promise...