有翡 | LEGEND OF FEI (2020)

Li Yan being a pampered menace for @cynical-harlequin

1. Li Yan: a gremlin. (the little sister no one wants, kind of annoying, professional fake-crier/brat, somehow part of an important martial arts family but not really that into it, thinks snakes are cute, honestly just needs something to do)

2. Yang Jin: a gremlin. (aspiring himbo, kind of annoying, obsessively good at martial arts, somehow a medicine sect leader but doesn't know anything about medicine, mildly snakephobic, sort of confused at how to do the right thing but trying?)

Because Li Yan's not very responsible sometimes and Yang Jin is not too bright when he really really really wants to fight some new cool jianghu star he's heard about, Li Yan winds up in a kind of Ransom of Red Chief situation with Yang Jin.

While supposedly being a kidnapping victim, A-Yan (right) yells at Yang Jin (left) for practicing too loudly at night, and then makes him go buy her snacks (NB: at no time was she ever actually unable to get out of this situation)

Later, Yang Jin keeps bumping into Li Yan for reasons, only half of which are because he wants to make sure she's OK, and it's becoming clear to everyone that this pair is THE TWO MOST ANNOYING PEOPLE IN THE WORLD, TOGETHER AT LAST FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME. Maybe it's meant to be?? BUT! THEN!

They bump into

3. Ying He Cong: a gremlin. (annoying poison otaku, itinerant poison doctor, confused by a world full of rude people who don't understand his sincere interest in putting in dibs on poisoned corpses, has a lot of pet snakes on his person at all times)

When we get the three together chaos ensues, from initial suspicions and snake-snatching (and snake-hiding-from) to Ying He Cong and Yang Jin debating over who's going to test the poison and antidote THIS time OH SHIT IT'S A-YAN DON'T LET HER SEE IT OR SHE'LL DEFINITELY CHUG IT LOOK NORMAL SAY SOMETHING NORMAL

(These 2 barely know each other at this point and Ying He Cong barely knows Li Yan at this point, and yet! the dynamics...!)

I'm not even going to tell you what these two dumbasses are doing in the below scene. Well, OK, they're trying to hold a sachet between their faces, which is the most ridiculous solution possible to their problem unless they just really want to squish their heads together for some reason.

But it's because Li Yan needs the braincell, you see. (The guys are in the background.) I have cropped out the spoiler (?).

Cheng Peng and Yang Jin's short program costumes at the 2021 Gran Premio d'Italia. They skated to music by Alicia Keys.