#wordsfailme

I've fallen in love with a laughter under the stars, the morning bird song and the clear blue sky.

I've fallen in love with a city on the top of the log flume and all the small towns I've called my home.

I've fallen in love with the pebble beach as I look out to tide, the old penny arcade and cool night cab drives.

I've fallen in love with the smallest of humans and they still take up most of my heart.

I've fallen in and out of love with myself my entire life but the truth is I've fallen twice,

I've fallen harder than anything I've ever felt and right now, I've never felt more sure or unsure of anything in my whole life.

All I know is that it was her, she walked in and the whole room stopped.

She walked in like she owned every inch of that place and every place before it, like she laid every inch of the floor and rose her way up through the roof but really she didn't just simply walk through the door she entered my universe, really she took every inch of me, immediately. Without hesitation, without asking because she never needed to she already owned every inch of my being and she didn't even care to get my name.

She walked in and the whole room stopped,

she walked in like she'd been there a million times before,

she walked in like she owned every inch of that place and if only for a second the music blurred,

the background faded away and it was just her.

Maybe half of the room didn't see her,

maybe half of them didn't even care but like the calm in the eye of the tornado I'd never seen anything more clear.

But then again she was the tornado, she was fierce, so powerful and a world wind of such grace and adventure. I couldn't help but heard with gusting force of admiration for such a wonderful turn of nature, how could they not notice her?

Maybe that's what made her so great, maybe she never needed to be noticed and she sure as hell never needed anyone's approval.

She laid every page open to me, she went over all the words and she didn't even need to utter a sound but of course she would anyway and between the rambled hurricane of fathomed narcotic fuelled stories I read her silent words, sometimes her loudest.

Just like every time before it was just her, everything stopped and it was just her.

Her words enchanted me, I hung onto every sentence, I never wanted the story to end just like the days spent with her. The end was always an awkward blur because of course we knew it was never really the end.

I'm sure she was blinded by every single shine she illuminated, I'm sure she was blinded by the flattery that I couldn't help but to shower her with, maybe she's still blinded, maybe she'll always be blinded by a light that I've never seen shine so bright, her soul, her smile.

It was her, she owned every inch of me and everywhere she ever wanted to be, it was her she stole the greatest parts I didn't know existed within myself, she blinded me and I hope I never see anything so breathtaking walk in and own a whole universe inside of me ever again.

But what if her universe was never you, what if she already had a universe and you was about to destroy it, what if her universe was so much more than the fantom universe you live in?

What if she just needed a break from reality, need a taste for your fantasy? What if she knew that its all pretend the universe your brain created for the eye of the public?

What if she knew that we were from two different worlds, two different universes and two different planets?

What if she actually knew what you've had to do before she met you?

That she was the one who changed you, she was the one who made waiting for the universe to have its way worthwhile, that you'd waited for her your whole life.

Cause after all I was whisky, the words sound so dark like the barrels it's pulled from after years of maturing and simply learning to be better year after year and she was vodka, distilled maybe 50 times over for the purest, clearest and strongest thing I've ever laid my lips on.

If I'd fallen in love twice before and I'd fallen apart loosing that then this time I must not destroy something so beautiful, something so perfect, someone so worthy because as we all know if you really love her then you must let her go.

Don't just let her go cause she was never yours to begin with, don't just let her go cause your destroying her universe, don't just let her go cause you've tampered with her morals, put her normality in danger or cause you'll never feel adequate compared to her. Let her go because if you truly love her you must set her free and if she feels it too she'll come back to you, for you, with you and she'll never let you not love her again.

I can't destroy someone so beautiful and maybe that's why love has never worked before, maybe this is the only time you've ever really fallen..

I've fallen in love with her happiness and that's surely the purest thing to ever have fallen in love with.

After all everything I've ever fallen in love with I've distroyed and this time I can't bring myself to do it, if that's isn't love then I don't know what is.