#womenschoice

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If your gay, cool I'm proud of you.

If your straight, cool I'm proud of you.

If you don't know what your sexuality is, it's okay you'll figure it out.

If you own a gun, cool, please be safe with it.

If you don't own a gun, cool, good for you.

If you don't know if you want a gun, that's okay you can do research it should help.

If your trans, I'm proud of you.

If your gender non-conforming, I'm proud of you.

If your neither, that's okay please don't make those people hate themselves.

If you support women getting an abortion, good for you.

If you don't support women getting abortions, okay please don't tear down women for getting one.

If you don't know where you stand, that's okay you can do research to help you.

If you want children, good for you.

If you don't want children, please don't get angry at your friends that do.

If you don't know if you want kids or not, that's okay it's your life.

If you want/have tattoos, awesome I hope they look cool.

If you don't want tattoos, that's okay please don't make fun of other people who have them.

What’s the difference why I’m out of work?”

I was having a conversation with a few of my girlfriends when the conversation turned to sabbaticals. A number of companies offer them after a certain amount of time at an organization but for one of the girls, the owner of her company didn’t believe that people should get a sabbatical in addition to existing vacation. Why should they be out of office an extra month?

As we all provided perspectives, the conversation came up around maternity leave. A woman who has a child can be out of work for three months in addition to her regular vacation. Does this punish the women who don’t have children?

As I brought this conversation up to my boss, his response was, “well, it’s different”. Of course, it is, and this isn’t to say I don’t believe in maternity leave. In fact, I think maternity leave in the US is an absolute joke and women deserve a hell of a lot better. But when I started breaking it down, the way we treat those with children is much different than the way we treat those without.

Consider those who leave early. Those who leave early to watch their kid’s little league game aren’t questioned while those who leave early without an excuse are judged.

Need to work from home because your kid is sick? No problem. Need to work from home because you are sick? Well, unless you’re really sick, you should be in the office or else take a sick day.

I just returned from a trip to Australia where nearly every person I talked to mentioned a 4-6 week holiday they had taken, were about to take, or had planned. Why? Because in other countries, vacation is looked at much differently. Here, taking time off is often frowned upon, and a result, the average American takes 16.5 days in total and 55% don’t even use all the time they have.

As a single woman, 15 years into my career and at a very flexible workplace, I take much more time than the average person. But that still only amounts to ~25 days each year. Even with that, I feel guilty. I feel guilty if I work from home or if I need to leave early. I make an effort to stay at work even when I don’t feel great or make sure I am present at key events. Only last year did I start not answering emails when I was on vacation.

Admittedly, I get frustrated when I see those with kids continuously leaving early, working from home, or shortening their work schedules. We are expected to work the same schedule so why are those without kids judged so differently?

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