#witty quotes

My first experience with digital taglines was when I joined conferences on such computer relay systems as Fidonet and Wildnet in the mid-1980s. Users would add them to the bottom of a conference post, and they were mostly well-known aphorisms and sentiments circulating in the culture as a whole. An example of one I saw repeated often, to paraphrase: "Sure I'm in shape! Round is a shape isn't it?"

With my penchant for wordplay and limerick writing, I took it as a personal challenge to compose several unique tags to cap off my own posts at various user groups. Some of you dear readers may even have come across a few of my personal tags as they bounced around the globe. Below is a partial list of my original aphorisms written between 1986-1998. Hope something below brings you a smile today!

Beware of geeks bearing .GIFs! Never surf faster than your guardian geek can type. Freudian slips are the underwear of ideas. I seized the day, but it struggled free and slapped me in the face. When finally their minds' eyes met, 'twas love at second sight. Packing MIND.QWK with PKDICK Sheesh, Bokonon, not another pain in the karass?! Stop scrapin' the scab off my healin' heart, honey --Twavis Twit So he says to the Shapeshifter waitress, "Keep the change." We bought the whole nine yards from bolts of whole cloth. If you persevere in fanning lame flame, you only make ash of yourself. A balanced perspective is the one most often attacked. Earthworm movement against grass-roots organizations is underfoot! Her bad timing was bottled and sold in Zürich as a novelty item. Like lemmings happy to Rush out on a Limbaugh...humbug! He merchandised his issue-waffling, and it sold like hotcakes. Weird how a lot of its usage becomes "wierd how alot of it's" usage. Grammar Moses adds her to sense. I want to live with a synonym ghoul. Has subjunctive, as it were, become a passé case? Had one bad rap too many, so they seized my poetic license. Alternative Music: More Offbeat But Still on the Money Wouldn't feel like a pincushion if the world weren't so full of pricks. I heard it through divine grape / Not much longer would you be ape I'd rather be a recluse than a loose wreck. Ask not for whom the drummer drums; he beats off for thee. The angels wanna wear my blue suede shoes. I'll be baksheesh! --Sheik Yerbouti I’m Friday's Child in a Wednesday World Flamenco dancer, castanet round my heart! Content in proper context is magic in the making. In a universe of games, she who refuses to play is the true winner. Computer not responding to boot? Try flattery instead. Now paying for a lifetime of integrity. Filled with angst and wondering why my ex is tense. Who me? I'm just the observer observing the observer. She was a painting in search of a frame. a) prophet b) priest c) saint d) monk e) nun of the above I could see the "loco" motives in their trains of thought. I'm hardheaded against hard hearts. "This is the best of all possible worlds -- NOT." Wayne Candide That an Uzi in your pocket or some horribly grotesque mutation? _The Story of Disk-O_: A Hot Keys Tutorial However far I lower my sights, it's never enough to keep up. Ever feel like an experiment gone awry? A joke of cosmic proportion / A punchline from the gutter Individuation on ethereal waves over the astral plane You need a checkbook for a chick, a personality for a woman. Concoction: A very big shell sale Fantasy can take you everywhere and leave you nowhere. Best Blues Chip Stock: Kimberly-Clark Corp. Even at wit's end, I still can muster appreciation of true wit.

All taglines © Kathleen A. Martin

"So does quicksand," said Cordelia.

How three words from Cordelia Carstairs make you. Just. Love. Her.