#wintersoldier

The apartment was quiet when Y/N walked out of the bedroom. The only sound came from the television still running somewhere in the living room, low enough to barely hear. They followed the flickering light and stopped in the doorway when they saw him asleep on the couch.

Bucky looked uncomfortable as hell. One arm thrown across his stomach, his head tilted awkwardly against the couch cushion like he had only meant to sit there for a few minutes before passing out accidentally. The blanket from their bed was hanging half onto the floor.

Then Y/N noticed the metal arm sitting on the coffee table, placed there carefully beside him.

Their stomach tightened a little at the sight.

“Bucky?” they said quietly.

The reaction was immediate.

Bucky woke up like someone had fired a gun next to his head. His whole body jerked forward hard, breathing sharp before his eyes even focused properly. For one bad second he looked completely ready to fight whoever was standing over him.

Then he recognized Y/N.

Everything in him dropped after that. His shoulders loosened and he dragged a hand down his face roughly before leaning back again.

“Sorry,” he muttered.

Y/N walked over slowly and sat down on the edge of the couch, glancing once more at the arm on the table before looking back at him. “Why are you sleeping out here?”

Bucky stayed quiet for a moment. His eyes stayed fixed somewhere on the floor instead of them.

“I had a nightmare.”

His voice sounded rough from exhaustion more than sleep.

Y/N waited without pushing him and eventually Bucky exhaled through his nose, rubbing his hand against his jaw.

“You moved in your sleep and I grabbed you.” His expression tightened immediately after saying it. “For a second I thought somebody was on me.”

Y/N remembered it then. Barely. The feeling of being pulled awake for half a second in the middle of the night before Bucky suddenly let go and got out of bed. They had been too tired to fully process it at the time.

“You let go,” they said quietly.

“After a moment.” His jaw clenched hard enough Y/N could see it. “I woke up and realized it was you .”

The room went silent again. Bucky leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, staring down at his remaining hand like he could not stand looking anywhere else.

“I just kept thinking about it after that,” he admitted finally. “What happens if one day I don’t stop fast enough.”

Y/N’s chest hurt hearing that because he sounded genuinely afraid of himself. Not dramatic or angry. Just looking tired and scared in a way that he looked worn down.

Bucky glanced over at the arm sitting beside them on the table.

“So I took it off.”

Like that explained everything.

But Y/N stayed where they were, looking at him quietly instead of reacting with anger like he expected.

“You should be pissed at me for that,” Bucky said quietly. He still was not looking at them. “I grabbed you hard enough to leave marks.”

“Why?” Y/N asked quietly. “You had a nightmare and scared yourself so bad you took your own arm off.” They shook their head slightly. “I’m not angry at you for that.”

Bucky stayed silent.

Y/N moved closer, kneeling in front of him so they were at the same level before speaking again.

“I know who you are, Buck. I wouldn’t still be here if I thought you were gonna hurt me, and I know you wouldn't do that on purpose.”

Y/N slowly lifted a hand to his cheek, making Bucky finally look at them again.