#winter rambles

That for the most part this website is a celebration of writing and art, poetry and painting. That you can make or do anything you want about pretty much anything you want, and there is someone out there on the other side of the screen who will cheer you on. That I can make friends in England or Ohio, Canada or the Philippines, who share the same interests and that continuously inspire and challenge me. That there is such diversity and richness in the people who are here that choose to share the unending splendor inside of themselves.

hiiii okay so !! Since the ts preview has come out on Patreon I thought I’d give my thoughts :] please be aware of spoilers below and also, these are just my opinions, so take them with a grain of salt.

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Let’s start with my main concerns so we can end on a positive note!!

1: the pacing.

Now, I’ll start with the thing most talked about: the quickness when it comes to the romances. Each character, even ones like Vere or Mhin, jumpstart the progress of the relationship faster than I had expected, which gave me a liiiittle whiplash.

But here’s the thing, I’ve played a loooot of romance games. My first one was Arcana! Where we can have a relationship break-up before you’re even officially together.

I kinda understand that the quickness of relationship progression was just apart of the romance game formula. Which makes sense especially when you’re in a visual novel format and not like— a game similar to bg3 or the interactive novels that can spread out through the span of multiple books.

So it was a lot easier for me to brush that off, especially considering that the full game has been said to be only around like ? 5 chapters ?

Now other visual novels, even confined to shorter time, can still take a slower approach. (Example being: Obscura. Ohhh don’t even get me started on that masterpiece—)

But I understand that’s not the approach every visual novel will, and has to take. Which means that I won’t be taking this criticism into the full game, and instead will keep my eyes on how they choose to continue the romance.

My bigger concern (which is probably not that serious) is that all of this will be over wayyy too quickly, without giving us any time to breathe.

Arcana, despite the quickness of the romance, still allowed the story itself to breathe and let you have fun. I hope that will be the same with Touchstarved. Especially since there won’t be any longer scenes locked behind a paywall.

2: the MC

To be completely honest with you, I’ve never liked the TS mc hshshshshs— when I first played I was like “I would NOT say that” and they have annoyed me more than once. But again, I’ve played a lot of romance games, I’m so used to just going “well this character would actually say this instead.” I’ve put my not-stick thin pale girl ocs into MYSTIC MESSENGER AND OTHERS OKAY THIS ISNT MY FIRST RODEO

But I can understand that this can still take people out of the story, and any criticisms of Mc is valid. I just don’t personally mind too much. (Not everyone can be a Vesper okay 😞)

For me, it will all depend on how the mc is written throughout the entire game. If they have development, if they have more agency, if they will be able to prove why THEY are the mc.

(Like how arcana MC was able to grow more confident, use their powers to defeat the devil. How Last Legacy MC was able to progress into a moreeee leadership type role)

One thing I’m actually worried about, and have seen become more prominent— is that the writing itself has been shaved down to what feels like, sometimes, the bare bones.

If you’ve had the previous backer updates, you’ve seen the writing process. And a lot of it!! Isn’t even re-wording to better the flow, but just simply cutting it done until it goes beyond just being concise, but restricted. Bare.

This is a visual novel, which means the descriptions should be allowed more space. I want to see the character of this writing to shine! I hate when personality and character and depth is sacrificed for the sake of what is excused to be *conciseness*

If you’re a writer, you’re familiar with the three C’s and know that being Concise is one of them. But it’s not to sand down creative expression until a colorful paragraph is one, shiny sentence, it’s there to smooth over messy wording, to trim!! To trim lengthy paragraphs that go on longer than they need to.

It was disheartening to see this process take over the demo in the update, and it was a bummer to see it continue in the previews. I feel like the team has been limited to what they can say, what they can have the writing express.

I also fear that they have let some of the fandom tooooo sweeten the horror? Like when they said in the demo update that they ‘gave vere something to eat so he wouldn’t be so bloodthirsty’ so it would be harder for him to kill you. NOOOOOOOO !!!! That’s what shocked me !! What brought vere into my attention !! I thought it gave proper consequence, it served as a preview into what choosing vere would entail. Murder. Risk. Caution while also knowing when to choose boldness.

So I do worry that they will be holding themselves back from what they originally intended for the game. I want it to be a romance, yes, but I’m also here for the horror.

My biggest concern is that the team has been held back ever since the demo first came out. I worry that they have split from the cooperate hold and restrictions just to bring with them the lingering uncertainty that mindset planted in them.

I want to see this game be its truest self, even if it unsettles people, even if it’s not what some people want it to be. I want to see what I signed up for: monster horror and messy, bloody, often disturbing romance.

I really, truly love this game. Despite the flaws and concerns, I’ve been blown away by the art and the characters and the world this team has so lovingly crafted. Im in love with the lore, the music, the promises. The relationships between the cast, (Vere and Ais, oughhh they’re such a mess…) the backstories I can’t wait to see fleshed out.

I still trust these writers, and I’m proud of them for achieving their goals and for doing what they do to bring us this passion project.

So that’s why I hope they won’t be held back and will take their time to bring us what they truly envisioned. Because even with the flaws I’ve stated before, I still had a blast playing each chapter. I thought they were fun, intense, and exciting.

It also felt pretty ethereal at times— like with the music— hello— the scene where you’re with Vere and walk by all the statues—

he makes a list, evaluates all the alphas on the grid, he takes it dead serious. max doesn't know why is kimi suddenly asking him about charles and esteban and lewis, it's strange but whatever that's just kimi being kimi. and that's when kimi discovers his mortal enemy: oscar piastri. because while max and oscar may not spend that much time together on camera, they are always around each other otherwise and it's driving kimi insane!!

whenener he tries to scheme a date together with charles for max, or a COD and FIFA match with esteban max always says no because he has something planned with oscar! he is seriously going insane, who does piastri think he is? and while kimi thinks he is the next reincarnation of james bond, he isn't subtle at all, almost everyone on the grid knows about his plan more or less, including oscar and max.

they are both omegas, have been dating since australia 2025, and only close friends know. oscar finds it very amusing to see kimi trying to curse him with his eyes or try to worm his way around max to get him away. so when monaco happened this year and he got an invite to max's home he thinks this is his chance! he will present the top 3 alpha he has carefully chosen, he will get an alpha for max. and then he arrives and damn oscar piastri is there, in max's shirt and stupid shorts and smelling like max so much kimi can't even distinguish oscar's scent from max's. this is a disaster, max will die as a bachelor and it's piastri's fault.

I don't think I ever shared that time I was asked to talk on a Podcast about fanfiction writing and hanging out in a fandom. At first, I was very nervous about sharing my real name and face and stuff, but I figured if my kiddo found it eventually, she would hopefully be old enough to write in her own fandom.

(Spoiler alert: kiddo is going to be twelve at the end of this month and is writing and reading Marvel fanfiction. I'm so proud I can't stand it. Chip off the old block and all that.)