#which is fair

And. AND. There’s so much of Bruce in Dick, so much of what he could have been without the trauma and self-imposed isolation, that when the JL talks about Nightwing being so good in contrast to Batman, they don’t always realize how much of that goodness is Bruce’s.

Not without applying leverage to some maladaptive codependencies that existed within the relationship dynamic.

The person concerned would never get help for themaelves unless it was framed as “how can you be so selfish and hurt me like this? Why won’t you take care of yourself? Isn’t my love for you enough?”

Ilya has always wanted to have kids, he loves kids! He loved his niece and he loves the like kids.

But

At the same time he doesn’t want kids, he doesn’t want them to get his sadness, he doesn’t want them to get his anger, he doesn’t want them to get his stubbornness, his violence, his darkness.

So when Shane asks about it he tells him no, because he doesn’t want to bring a child into this world when there’s the possibility that he could turn out like his father, when there’s the possibility that he turns out like his mother.

He loves kids he just doesn’t want his own in fear that he’ll fuck them up. He doesn’t want to bring them into a world that is designed to break them down.

He doesn’t tell Shane the reason or why he says no. Shane can tell there’s more to it than Ilya is willing to talk about but then his cousin dies leaving a daughter behind

She’s young and has no other family that can take her in. Her grandparents are too old and his parents are also too old for a 2 year old. So Shane sits Ilya down and explains that she has no one.

Ilya agrees almost immediately because that’s a child that’s Shane’s family, his family he can’t let her go into the system.

As time goes on they learn how to be parents and Ilya starts to that he won’t be like his father because that HIS daughter and he’d never treat her the way his father treated him. And he may still have bad days but he does not want to die he is better.

So one day he sits Shane down and asks if I’m the future when they are both ready and retired maybe they could have another kid. Shane is of course over the fucking moon.

)) You can read the first part here