#watsonian analysis

Harry fights Draco really differently than he fights everyone else.

So okay. Normally when he fights, Harry's go-to spells are:

Impedimenta (slow down)

Petrificus Totalus (paralyze)

Stupefy (knock out)

Expelliarmus (disarm)

Which means his strategy is get away from/incapacitate his opponent as quickly as possible and that's IT. Harry is not a flashy or creative fighter the way Dumbledore, Voldemort, and heck even side characters like Percy are. Which makes perfect sense. Fighting has never been a game for Harry. It's never been abstract. He'll do all these badass things but when he talks about fighting (like we see during the DA segments) he's not thinking about it like it's something interesting or cool. He's picturing going up against a more powerful opponent, probably while injured and scared. And what's the best thing to have in that situation? Four useful, all-purpose spells that you've practiced enough times that you don't have to think about them anymore.

Zachariah Smith gives Harry a hard time for relying on a spell as "basic" as expelliarmus, which tells us that in-universe, Harry's stripped-down dueling style might be considered kind of plain or boring. But Harry's a very effective duelist, probably because he is so practical. He doesn't care about showing off, looking powerful, or intimidating his opponents.

... except when he's fighting specifically Draco.

When he's fighting DRACO MALFOY, Harry brings out the fun spells:

Rictusempra (tickling)

Furnunculus (boils)

Leg-Locker jinx

Levicorpus (levitate by ankle)

Toenail-growing hex

And also Sectumsempra, which he THINKS is going to be another embarrassing/fun spell, because levicorpus and the toenail-growing hex also came out of the Half-Blood Prince's textbook, and Harry thinks this third spell is going to be another one like that.

So my conclusion is that Harry just kind of... uniquely enjoys fighting with Draco. He's not trying to end the encounter as fast as possible, there probably is some element where he wants to show off, hit Draco with something new or something clever. Harry and Draco have a dynamic where it's *fun* to one-up/get the upper hand over each other, and duels are perfect for that.

Evidence: The Fairy Godparents Job. He hasn't learned to grift yet really, so even though he's inside the con he's still himself. No character work, like could feasibly be used as a Watsonian explanation to write off Hardison's two transphobic jokes across the series. He mocks Skyler's name "Sk-Sk-Skyler? What? Is that a boy's name?" and then turns around and tells Widmark to stop embarrassing himself because "there's girls here." <- Toxic masculinity, transphobia.

Obviously he is choosing to be cruel to Skyler, an obvious bully, in an attempt to use his authority as a teacher to build up Widmark's confidence, but the method he chooses is unnecessarily geared towards attacking Skyler's masculinity and also something he has no control over (his name), rather than his behavior, which is only going to perpetuate the cycle of abuse.

When I think about how we are shown how Widmark's dad treats him, and then later it's revealed his dad is in league with Skyler's dad, I am vividly reminded of the fact that many bullies are repeating behavior they receive at home. Interestingly, Hardison, as someone who grew up with an affirming and caring Nana, is the one most viscerally affected by the horrible things Widmark's dad says to him — and it's a very interesting contrast to the episode previous, where Eliot steps in to rescue a child from physical abuse. This goes to show that Eliot probably doesn't view emotional abuse to be as seriously damaging to a child, which explains why he is comfortable emotionally attacking one child to defend another.

This reinforces the idea that Eliot's father taught him a very toxic form of midwest American masculinity, lessons which were then entrenched by the military's cult of masculinity, which would not be compatible with an open and accepting mindset.

From a historical fashion standpoint, the fashion in FMA:b (and the manga) is all over the place, but since the 1914/1915 setting of Amestris is not actually linked to the real historical time period there is no need to apply rigid fashion rules to the worldbuilding. And yet, I think it is very interesting to explain the fashion of Amestris through a Watsonian lens.

And what better place to start with than the very a-historical skin-tight, skin-showing clothing of our teenage characters?

Winry is always dressed practically and job oriented (coveralls, gloves, something to tie her hair back with) and yet she’s also dressed like a typical modern teenager. Crop tops and short skirts are the norm for when Winry is doing everyday stuff outside of her workshop or extreme territories. She is by far not the only character that dresses like this - we see both Matel and Paninya in similarly tight and form-fitting outfits.

And the world around them doesn’t react to this excess of skin with disgust or outrage - their way of clothing seems to be the general norm, or at least pretty widespread and accepted. But if we look closer, it seems that this is only a societal norm for young people.

Most of the older women we meet, are dressed rather conservatively, with dresses and long skirts being the norm. Hair is most often drawn in a bun on older female characters, and the general dress shape seems to be late 19th century inspired.

In this crowd scene for example, we can see a handful of young women wearing pants with their hair open, while the majority of the women depicted seem to be wearing skirts, dresses, and aprons as befitting a working women, while others seems to have scarves wrapped around their shoulders as if out and about on a stroll through town.

Which would make sense. This would divide the expected “proper” way of dressing along the axis of age (and/or marital status), with the cut-off being somewhere in the mid- to late twenties. Characters like Riza Hawkeye, Matel, and Sheska play into this, as they are all more conservatively dressed as Winry, but do not yet follow stricter fashion rules as they seem to be common in older demographics.

In this scene Riza is wearing a skirt that covers her knees and a jacket that covers her neck and the entirety of her arms. We later see her dressed in different civilian clothes as well, with a white blouse, a pink cardigan, and comfortable loose pants. As such she is in a transitional phase of fashion, between the more loose and short styles of the youth and the more traditional cuts of the older generation.

Shezka is much the same, her blouse and typical turtleneck much more “grown up” than the clothes Winry and her age-mates wear, and yet the rest of her clothes have not yet reached the same level of “age”. Both of these characters are also unmarried, which could be another factor in the way they dress - historically speaking, expectations on dress were different between single women and those that were married, so there is a distinct possibility of the same being the case in the world of FMA.

Which brings us to another very interesting axis of analysis: how do jobs and fashion interact in Fullmetal Alchemist?

The way I see it Amestris is a country on the verge of changing. We see a noteworthy amount of female soldiers, but only one female General - so much so, that Sloth is ordered to kill “the” female General, because Olivier Mira Armstrong is the only woman in the upper brass. The other female soldiers we meet all have ranks up to First Lieutenant, but nothing above. There are no female State Alchemists. Most of the other professionals we meet are men.

It makes sense for Olivier to be the first female general based on her family history and the fact that she was probably an outstanding soldier - but it also highlights that the military as a structure has probably only allowed female soldiers for up to 30 to 40 years by the time we meet the Elrics and their world. And I see much of Amestris through that lens - most gender-based laws have probably been repelled by now, but the society at large still remembers a much more divided structure. This is reflected in the fashion, of course.

In a country that has only recently changed its views on which professional fields should be open to all genders, the divide between the fashion rules for those that remember more rigid structures and those that grew up without certain assumptions is growing. Societal standards are slow to change, but they do reflect the opinions of the general public - or at least the rules and traditions people tend to cling to. 

Let’s take Gracia for example. While the hemline in general seems to be rising in all age demographics (except the elderly, while staying relatively conservative in older demographics and - hypothetically - married women) Gracia dresses less form-fitting than other women in her age range (Riza Hawkeye, Rebecca Catalina). She is generally dressed more “proper”, even later on when we see her wearing skirts that end above the knee. What I really find interesting though is the comparison to her younger self - roughly eight years younger, as this is a picture from the end of the Ishval War. Even though she is probably about twenty to twenty-three in this picture, she is dressed a lot more conservative than all the other female characters we have met in that age range so far. This can have multiple reasons. Maybe Gracia is from a more conservative, rich family that favors more traditional style of dress - or we can see the rabid change in society in just eight years.

Again, Amestris as a society in the middle of extreme social change.

We can even see it in the military uniforms. Female soldiers in active duty wear the same clothes as their male counterparts.

(including the butt-cape)

But what we see multiple times is other female officers employed at Central Command (or other military headquarters) wearing a different uniform - with a much shorter skirt (tho a longer skirt option seems to be available, as we also see female soldiers wearing skirts that cover the knees).

This could imply two things: a) the longer skirts were the normal uniform for female employees of the military not cleared for active duty, and only recently shorter skirts became a part of the uniform as a reaction to the changing fashion landscape or b) the shorter skirts existed for longer as some sort of sexist tool of the upper brass to demean their female employees.

For the sake of our current worldbuilding, let’s go with Option A).

Again, the general hemline seems to be rising - in a way, it wouldn’t even be historically unheard off. In the 1920s the female silhouette changed so much in young, city-dwelling circles that you might even see the occasional knee peak out from under a skirt - Amestris could be experiencing a similar change in fashionable dress.

There is one other thing I want to mention while I’m at it: the influences of other cultures on Amestrian culture and fashion.

Amestris is an imperial power, and while that means that it has a very strong national identity on the one hand, we can also see how it has adapted other cultural influences in its daily life. While the wearing of traditional Ishvalen clothing is probably demonized and a sure way to get othered, influenced from other nations Amestris is war-ing with can be found.

Xing-style clothing seems to be pretty common, and if anything it seems to be a sign of status to be able to afford clothes from Xing.

We see Mrs. Bradley were Xing-style clothing multiple times throughout the show, and it always seems to be something a lady of good standing can do without consequences. This implies a certain level of cultural trade and exchange between the two countries, especially once you consider that Xingese features seem to be common enough in Amestris that Ling always has to mention his status as a foreigner since his appearance alone would not give it away.

(And the fact that all Lan Fan and Fu had to do to go undercover was exchange their Xingese dress for classical Amestrian clothing and suddenly they could disappear in a crowd without a problem)

And this bit of decor in General Grumman’s office? This also implies some sort of cultural influences from Drachma.

There is also the fact that class probably does play a role in the way people dress, with people from Rush Valley, a certified weird town full of weird people, dressing more wild, with less need for social conventions in a place like that. And people from the countryside favoring practicality over fashion, and much of the women we see there wearing loose dresses and aprons, which makes sense. At the same time, what little we see of the Armstrong family, they seem to favor a more conservative style of dress, even at a younger age.

Which makes sense - fashion is influenced by a lot of different factors, class, age, gender, gender representation, work and cultural influences all making a difference.

And just as an aside - while this post mostly discusses women’s fashion in FMA:b, I think it applies to men’s fashion as well. At least to a certain degree. While most men are much more uniformly dressed in “old-timey” clothing, the current shift seems to be happening when it comes to wearing hats.

THIS

Never causes THIS

Shazam does not have tactile telekinesis

Clark never has to make these considerations like Billy does, even when he's not a reality warper. (great wall of china vision anybody?)

Using Watsonian logic he must have always had tactile telekinesis. And either Clark is pretty bad at it or Conner is a savant.

In Doylist reasoning the original artists didn't care much for realistic physics in their crazy comic, and we the readers didn't really notice much anyway.

Which reading do you like better? That Clark has a power he is below average with, or that Conner has unparalleled talent with what is normally a secondary power?

Watsonian logic: The character James Watson's reasoning, diegetic.

eg. he ate because he was hungry.

Doylist logic: The author Arthur Conan Doyle's reasoning, exegetic.

So not best/least evil/most doesn't-try-to-kill-students-outside-of-class person. Best *in the classrom.* Lets go -

22. Alecto Carrow

The only one on this list who teaches exclusively INCORRECT information (anti muggle propaganda). Easy way to get dead last.

21. Amycus Carrow

Successfully teaches accurate stuff, but in the wrong order. Bad gun safety, basically - teaching students to cast fiendfyre but not control it. Also forces students to torture each other as class activity, so you know. There's that.

20. Dolores Umbridge

Teaches accurate information... that is below student skill level... in a way that is both boring and condescending. She's all about "just copy the text book." So - basically a babysitter. Shuts down student engagement.

19. Rubeus Hagrid

Sorry to put Hagrid so low, but he is also *basically* a babysitter. I mean he does teach Harry about unicorns, dragons and giant spiders - outside of class. He clearly knows his stuff, but just is not great about that whole zone of proximal development thing. His classes are either WAY too easy, or way too hard. And he's lucky his experimentally-bred manticore/firecrab hybrid didn't seriously hurt anybody. He teaches ONE good class, and it's the one about thestrals.

18. Gilderoy Lockhart

Presumably does know the material in a theoretical way... but his classes are mostly trivia sessions centered around his books, and there's no way all that information is relevant, or accurate. (Like he talks about forcing werewolves to transform magically? that's not a thing.) (also puts things like 'what is gilderoy lockhart's favorite color' on tests) He does rank SLIGHTLY higher than Hagrid because the magical creatures he unleashes (and doesn't know how to control) are less dangerous. Also, I think if he put TOO much misinformation in his books, Hermione wouldn't defend him as much as she does. And he does organize student clubs and extracurriculars. The Dueling Club was a really good idea, even if the execution could use some work.

17. Firenze

He knows what he's talking about - but isn't interested in actually teaching. (He's mostly doing a favor for Dumbledore.) His class seems very chill and mellow, and his classroom is very beautiful. But it's more of a meditation class. He's someone who has just gone very off curriculum.

16. Severus Snape

I'm writing a whole thing about Snape-as-a-teacher, and he's probably the most brilliant person on this list... but look. He is ALSO just not that interested in teaching. He's a "take notes from the textbook" and "follow the instructions off the board" guy. He's much better at classroom management and classroom safety than Lockhart, and he actually is teaching what he's supposed to be teaching, unlike everyone so far. But he does also insult his students, make them cry, heavily favor the Slytherins and generally create a stressful learning environment. He's one hell of a textbook writer, and while Hermione is able to learn from him (she's able to learn from most of the the people on this list tbh) Harry and Neville both get a lot better at potions the second he is no longer in the room. Apparently his test scores look good though?

15. Cuthbert Binns

Knowledgeable, and actually does give lectures, but is boring. Does answer Hermione's questions about the Chamber of Secrets that one time. Very mellow classroom atmosphere. Harry often falls asleep. But no one has a bad experience in his class... just.... a very very boring one.

14. Quirinus Quirrell

Just as checked-out as Binns, but ranks higher because he's not as stagnant. Quirrell did take a sabbatical to learn more about his subject, and at least tries to get better. It doesn't *work* but you know. The students seem to find his classes boring and "kind of a joke." But not as comically boring as Binns.'

13. Sybil Trelawney

Knows her stuff (or at least - she is teaching the curriculum. The curriculum might be stupid, but that's not necessarily her fault.) Gives lectures, has a mellow classroom atmosphere (Harry falls asleep in this class too.) But she ranks higher than Binns or Quirrell because her presentation is better. She at least makes Divination seem dramatic and interesting. Lavender and Parvati are super engaged. Trelawney kinda picks on Harry for the bit though, and apparently "pick one student per year to be the bad-omens lighting rod" is just a very weird thing she does. Personally I think I prefer 'clueless' to 'checked out,' but that's up for debate.

12. Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank

Apart from being... weirdly sexist... seems like a great teacher. The GIRLS at least really enjoy her classes. Even Pansy, who seems like she would be really difficult to get engaged, likes her classes.

11. Rolanda Hooch

Since she only teaches that one class... not sure if she counts as a professor... but she does teach everyone the basics of how to operate a broom just fine. Leaving a lot of eleven-year-olds unsupervised is bad classroom management BUT I agree that Neville definitely needed someone to escort him up to the hospital wing. Really she needs a TA.

10. Aurora Sinistra

A professor who Harry seems to have no opinion on at at all, other than she gives a lot of homework.

9. Bathsheda Babbling

Teaches Ancient Runes. We know nothing about her, including her name, which is from JKR's notes.

8. Septima Vector

Teaches Arithmancy, and Hermione likes her.

7. Charity Burbage

Good enough at teaching Muggle Studies that Voldemort feels the need to publicly kill her. Have to assume that means she's got some decent influence over her students. I also think she gives good essay prompts ("Explain why muggles need electricity.) Doesn't rank higher because Hermione drops Muggle Studies, and we never actually see inside one of her classes.

6. Pomona Sprout

This is what I think Hagrid's classes would have looked like if he were more experienced. A little goofy, a little free-form, very practical and hands-on, a lot of laughing. The plants they're dealing with are at the right level, everything is challenging enough to be interesting, but everyone knows that no one's getting hurt. The only reason Sprout doesn't rank higher is that it's *Moody* that really identifies and nurtures Neville's interest in herbology, and it seems like that's an oversight on her part.

5. Minerva McGonagall

Strict but fair, AMAZING classroom management (transfiguration seems like such a hotbed for magical accidents, and the ones we see are incredibly minor, and dealt with in-class.) She effortlessly controls her room, her assignments are at the right level and usually sound interesting and fun. (I love that she gives extra points for how pretty your transfigured snuffbox is, that's cute.) Harry doesn't seem to do especially well in her class, but still enjoys it, which is the mark of a good teacher. Transfiguration also seems to have a reputation as one of the more "prestigious" subjects at Hogwarts, at least according to Augusta Longbottom. 'Transfiguration Professor' is kind of a feeder position for 'Headmaster.' So it's probably a fairly high-pressure subject to teach.

BUT. (but). I don't get the sense that Minerva finds being a teacher especially fun or rewarding, and I think you have to count that when you're in the top five. McGonagall should have a few higher-level classes, a handful of hand-picked NEWT apprentices, and enough time to do some academic writing. She's not an ideal teacher for the younger levels - and especially for students like Neville, who she's pretty harsh with. She's just too intimidating.

4. Horace Slughorn

Slughorn likes to run his classes competitively, way more than anyone else on this list... which is an approach that works really well for Harry and Draco, and less so for Hermione and Neville. I think they find it a little chaotic and unpredictable. But Slughorn clearly has tons of classroom presence, he's an engaging, motivating, charismatic speaker. He likes it when his students challenge him and surprise him, and he definitely likes emotionally connecting with them more than like, McGonagall does. He's the type of teacher to tell you funny anecdotes about his own life. Ex-students like him enough to keep in touch, and he clearly finds teaching incredibly fulfilling and rewarding. He gets Harry VERY interested in potions, very quickly.

The drawbacks are that Slughorn does play favorites. He likes charming, powerful students, and that isn't you... then you're probably going to find yourself overlooked (like Neville, or Ron.)

3. "Mad-Eye Moody" (Barty Crouch Junior)

One thing about McGonagall - I know this isn't exactly fair, it has more to do with the way the books are written. But - no one USES transfiguration outside of her class. The only examples of McGonagall's students using transfiguration out in the wild are:

Cedric turning a rock into a dog.

Barty Jr. turning his father into a bone

Barty Jr. turning Draco into a ferret.

Hermione making bread less moldy (unsuccessful)

Percy using transfiguration in combat to create spikes

And all four of those people are exceptional students who probably would have done fine with any teacher.

But Moody. Moody teaches Harry crucio, imperius, how to *resist* imperius, and a lot of his safety tips come in very handy when Harry has to deal with Umbridge. He gets a lot out of that class. Moody is also really good at dealing with Neville. He identifies that he's in a bad place after the Unforgivable Curses lecture, takes him aside, and very effectively encourages him and cheers him up. He had ulterior motives of course, but he still did it. Moody also gives engaging lectures, and has enough charisma and presence to impress the twins. I think he enjoys teaching for kinda twisted reasons... but he absolutely does enjoy it.

I will say though. I think Barty is probably leaning a bit on Moody's reputation and Moody's *look.* I don't think he'd be able to command that class so effortlessly if he were a 30-year-old skinny blonde guy.

2. Remus Lupin

If I'm putting the top guys through the "how do you handle Neville Longbottom" test - then Lupin passes with flying colors. He is universally beloved by everyone except Draco Malfoy (and the only criticism Draco can come up with is that his clothes are shabby.) Lupin is knowledgeable, endlessly kind and patient, has engaging lesson plans and assignments (I really like his obstacle-course final.) He gives Harry very successful extracurricular patronus lessons, and even incidental stuff like 'how to deal with grindylows' ends up being useful later.

The one thing I will say about Lupin is that he might err on the side of too lenient. I could see him being very unwilling to discipline a student, or give them a bad grade, or assign make-up work. Snape also says that he keeps bad class records, and - I think that's probably true.

1. Fillius Flitwick

Unexpected, but I think he's my winner. It does help that he's not on the page much and isn't important to the plot - that limits possible strikes against him - but still. NO one has a single word to say against Flitwick, ever. He's an ex-dueling champion, so he's very competent. His classes are fun and light-hearted, but everyone still comes away knowing how to do the spell of the day - and if you don't, he'll assign make-up work. We get absolute workhorse charms from him - wingardiam leviosa, accio, alohomora. He also seems to be the only teacher who is absolutely bulletproof during Umbridge's inspections:

"You know what Flitwick’s like, he treated her like a guest, didn’t seem to bother him at all. [Umbridge] didn’t say much. Asked Alicia a couple of questions about what the classes are normally like, Alicia told her they were really good, that was it.” “I can’t see old Flitwick getting marked down,” said George, “he usually gets everyone through their exams all right.”

I think Voldemort has got that Logan Roy dilemma: he wants someone who is both powerful enough to be a credit to him, powerful enough to count as a person... but who he also completely controls. And, I think there's evidence that Voldemort has been attempting to craft that particular relationship for a while now.

Like Lucius. I think you could make a very good case that early-twenties Lucius was one of Voldemort's favorites. He leaves him the diary. He's the only Death Eater that he calls by his first name during the Graveyard scene. He addresses his whole resurrection speech to Lucius *specifically.* But... even though Lucius might not know it, by the start of the second war he's already fallen out of favor. (He didn't go looking for Voldemort after all.) Voldemort spends a year letting Lucius fall over himself trying to win back his approval, just digging his own grave in the process. And then, Voldemort brings out the big guns. He controls Lucius by holding his son hostage and dangling forgiveness just out of reach forever... but by that point he just sees Lucius as completely pathetic.

I think it's very likely that Barty Junior was another of Voldemort's favorites. He loves, loves, loves talking him up to Peter and to the other death eaters. And absolutely that is a control tactic - praising Barty will make the other Death Eaters resentful/jealous of Barty, which means that Barty won't have any allies there and will just have to double down on his connection to Voldemort. But I also don't think Voldemort is *lying.* From his perspective, what's not to like? Barty sees his "Master" as this soulmate/father/savior, and he's off-the-charts brilliant. If he stuck around... I think he might have easily been in the running for Voldemort's favorite.

Voldemort also does have an interesting relationship with Peter. He knows that his true loyalty isn't actually on the table, for anyone. Peter can only be controlled with brute strength and/or limiting his choices so he doesn't have anywhere else to go. So... Voldemort negs him. Peter actually is a very talented, impressive wizard, and Voldemort trusts him with a lot. But his main tactic with Peter is to make sure his self-esteem stays absolutely rock-bottom. Probably why he exclusively calls him "Wormtail:" this nickname that is constantly reminding him of the worst thing he's ever done. Also, he puts that silver hand on him as a failsafe.

Bellatrix is of course Bellatrix - she's in love with him, he knows that, and absolutely uses it. (He also refers to her by a nickname, "Bella.") She's also powerful enough for him to respect, and from what we see...he's he's got her in a cycle where he needles her, lets the other Death Eaters laugh at her, which then means he gets to "protect" her by shutting them down. Pretty effective control method, honestly. There are hints that he's starting to be a little done with her hot-headedness though - one of the thoughts harry reads out of his head is "it had been a grave mistake to trust Bellatrix and [Lucius] Malfoy: Didn’t their stupidity and carelessness prove how unwise it was ever to trust?"

Snape is an interesting one. I honestly don't think Snape was like... that important during the first war. He became important to Voldemort when he gave him the prophecy, but clearly Voldemort isn't super sure about where he stands. During the Graveyard scene, he absolutely thinks that Snape has defected, and is never coming back. Of course then Snape does come back, and this is super flattering to Voldemort. Voldemort has kind of a *thing* about Dumbledore. Dumbledore is this constant figure in his life - the only one who sees through him, who doesn't respect him - and it drives him nuts. But here is Snape, picking him over Dumbledore? While being extremely intelligent, kind of a prodigy even? Voldemort's going to feel some sort of way about that, *especially* after Snape kills Dumbledore for him.

I do think that during the Unbreakable Vow scene, Snape is exaggerating the emotional closeness he has with Voldemort in order to - deflect suspicion, rattle Bellatrix, get her off his back. Snape has issues being emotionally close to - anyone, let alone Voldemort. But, I don't see any reason Voldemort would be lying to Snape right before he kills him: "You are a clever man, after all, Severus. You have been a good and faithful servant, and I regret what must happen.” Ideally he wouldn't kill him, sure. But he certainly doesn't seem too cut-up about it, and does seem slightly *done* with Snape during this scene. (He compares him to Lucius. Which is what he does when people start annoying him.)