FAV part of BELIEVE ME-my Kings♥
Kenji trails off, distracted as if on cue, by Nazeera herself. She saunters
toward the wedding arch, tall and steady in a gauzy, blush-colored gown.
She grins at Castle, who acknowledges her with a smile of his own;
Nazeera takes a position just off to the side of the arch, adjusting her skirts
as she settles in place.
It becomes terrifyingly clear to me then exactly where Ella is expected
to soon stand. Where I am expected to soon stand.
“But I haven’t finished with the tablecloths,” I say, “or the seating inside
—”
“Yeah. I noticed.” Kenji takes a sharp breath, tearing his gaze away
from Nazeera to look me in the eye. “Anyway, don’t worry. We took care of
it. You seemed really busy standing still for half an hour, staring at nothing.
We didn’t want to interrupt.”
“Okay.” Kenji claps his hands together. “First things first: do you need
to go to the bathroom or anything before we start? Personally, I think you
should go even if you don’t think you have to, because it would be really
awkward if you suddenly had t—”
“Stop.”
“Oh—right!” Kenji says, slapping his hand to his forehead. “My bad,
bro, I forgot—you never have to use the bathroom, do you?”
“No.”
“No, of course not. Because that would be human, and we both know
you’re secretly a robot.”
I sigh, resisting the urge to run my hands through my hair.
“Seriously, though—anything you need to do before you go up there?
You’ve got the ring, right?”
“No.” My heart is pounding furiously in my chest now. “And yes.”
“Okay, then.” Kenji nods toward the wedding arch. “Go ahead and get
into position under that flower thing. Castle will show you exactly where to
stand—”
AND HERE I STARTED SOBBING
I turn sharply to face him. “You’re not coming with me?”
Kenji goes stock-still at that, his mouth slightly agape. I realize, a
moment too late, exactly what I’ve just suggested— and still I can’t bring
myself to retract the question, and I can’t explain why.
Right now, it doesn’t seem to matter.
Right now, I can’t quite feel my legs.
Kenji, to his credit, does not laugh in my face. Instead, his expression
relaxes by micrometers, his dark eyes assessing me in that careful way I
detest.
“Yeah,” he says finally. “Of course I’m coming with you.”
“Hey, man,” Kenji whispers beside me. “You all right?”
I shake my head an inch.
“What’s wrong?”
I can feel Kenji studying my face.
“Oh—shit—are you having a panic attack?”
“Not yet,” I manage to say. I close my eyes, try to breathe. “It’s too loud
in here.”
“The music?”
“The people.”
“Okay. Okay. Shit. So you can, like, feel everything they’re feeling right
now? Right. Shit. Of course you can. Okay. All right, what should I do? You
want me to talk to you? How about I just talk to you? Why don’t you just
focus on me, on the sound of my voice. Fade everything else out.”
“I don’t know if that will work,” I say, taking a shaky breath. “But I can
try.”
“Cool. Okay. First of all, open your eyes. Juliette is going to walk out in
a couple of minutes, and you won’t want to miss it. Her dress is awesome.”
He whispers this, his voice altered just enough that I can tell he’s trying not
to move his lips. “I’m not supposed to tell you anything about it, because,
you know, it’s supposed to be a surprise, but whatever, we’re throwing
surprises out the window right now because this is an emergency, and I
have a feeling that once you see her your brain will do that creepy superfocus
thing it always does—you know, like when you ignore literally
everyone around you—and then you’ll start feeling better because, um,
yeah”—he laughs, nervously—“you know what? I’m beginning to realize
only right this second that, uh, when she’s around you don’t even seem to
notice other people, so, um—until then I can—yeah, I’m just going to
describe her to you, because, like I said, she’s going to look great. Her dress
is, like, really, really pretty, and I don’t even know anything about dresses,
so that should tell you something.”
The sound of his voice is a strange lifeline.
The more he speaks, filling my head with easily digestible nonsense, I
feel my heart rate start to slow, the iron fist around my lungs beginning,
slowly, to unclench.
I force my eyes open, and the scene briefly blurs in and out of focus, the
pounding of my heart still loud in my head. I glance at Kenji, who is staring
straight ahead, his face at rest as if nothing is amiss. This helps ground me,
somehow, and I manage to pull myself together long enough to look down
the petal-dusted aisle.
“So Juliette’s dress is, um, like, really glittery, but also really softlooking?
Winston and Alia had to come up with a new design on such short
notice,” Kenji explains, “but they were able to repurpose some gown you
guys got at the Supply Center yesterday. There was lots of, like, sheer fluffy
fabric, I don’t know what it’s call—”
“Tulle.”
“Yes. Tulle. Yes. Whatever. Anyway Alia spent all night, like, first of
all, making it nicer, and then sewing these little glittery beads all over it—
but, like, in a nice way. It’s really nice. And it’s got, like, these little tulle
sleeves that aren’t really sleeves—they sort of fall off the shoulder— Hey,
is this helping?”
“Yes,” I say, drawing in a full breath for the first time in minutes.
“Great, so—nice sleeves, and, and um, you know, it’s got a long fluffy
skirt— Okay, yeah, I’m sorry, bro, but I’m kind of out of descriptions for
Juliette’s dress, but— Oh, hey, here’s a fun fact: Did you know that Sonya
and Sara used to be, like, young virtuosos, way back in the day, pre-
Reestablishment?”
“No.”
“Yeah—yeah, so they started playing violin when they were fresh out of
diapers. Pretty cool, huh? Nazeera helped us confiscate the violins they’re
using today from old Reestablishment holdings. They’re playing this song
from memory. I don’t know what it’s called, but I’m pretty sure it’s
something fancy, from some old dead dude—”
“Of course you know what it’s called,” I say, still staring straight ahead.
“Everyone knows it.”
“Well I don’t know it.”
“This is the work of German composer Johann Pachelbel,” I explain,
struggling not to frown. “It’s often called Pachelbel’s Canon in D, because
it was meant to be played in the key of D major. Do you know nothing
about music?”
“Yeah, I don’t even know what the hell you just said.”
“How can y—”
“All right, shut up, no one cares—the music is changing, do you hear
that? When it goes high like that? That means she’s going to come out any
second now—”
The audience rises almost at once, a rush of breaths and bodies
clambering to their feet, craning their necks, and for a moment, I can’t see
her at all.
And then, suddenly, I do.
Relief hits me like a gust, leaving me so suddenly unsteady I worry, for
a moment, that I might not make it.
Ella looks spun from gossamer, glowing as she glitters in the soft light.
Her gown has a corseted, glimmering bodice that flows into a soft, decadent
skirt, her arms bare save delicate, off-the-shoulder scraps of tulle that graze
her skin.
She is luminous.
I’ve never seen her wear makeup, and I have no idea what they’ve done
to her face, except that she is now so beautiful as to be unreal, her hair in an
elegant arrangement atop her head, a long veil gracing her shoulders,
flowing with her as she walks.
She does not look like she belongs in this world, or in this dingy
backyard, or in this dilapidated neighborhood, or on this crumbling planet.
She is above it. Above us all. A spark of light separated from the sun.
A dangerous heat builds behind my eyes and I force myself to fight it
back, to remain calm, but when she sees me, she smiles—and I nearly lose
the fight.
“I told you it was a nice dress,” Kenji whispers.
“Kenji.”
“Yes?”
“Thank you,” I say, still staring at Ella. “For everything.”
“Anytime,” he says, his voice more subdued than before. “This is the
beginning of a new chapter for all of us, man. For the whole world. This
wedding is making history right now. You know that, right? Nothing is ever
going to be the same.”
Ella glides toward me, nearly within reach.I feel my heart pounding in
my chest, happiness threatening to destroy me. I’m smiling now, smiling
like the most ordinary of men, staring at the most extraordinary woman I’ve
ever known.
“Believe me,” I whisper. “I do.”
(I love ending the story with them both♥)
