It’s fine.  It’s fine.  It’s okay.  It’s safe.  It’s safe.  It’s safe, Lil.  (  she can hear it in hop’s voice but it doesn’t help.  )  Her hands tremble, too small around the pokéball.  With a monster in it.  With her nightmares in it.  She hates it.  She hates it.

What a cruel way to think about a Pokémon.

Trying to get braver.  To stop thinking of it as a monster.  To stop letting fear own her.  But every time she lets Eternatus out and sees it and remembers reality warping around her / remembers almost dying / remembers Leon on the ground / she can’t she CAN’T ------

She’d promised Akira they’d hang out as soon as she done with all of today’s duties, but as she trudges out of the office in Hammerlocke stadium, she regrets the offer.  It’s not that she doesn’t want to hang out with Akira!  She’s just SO TIRED.  Running on too little sleep and WAY too much caffeine (  doesn’t even LIKE tea...  ) and not sure she’ll be even halfway decent company.  But they haven’t been able to visit in AGES --- she’s always too busy.

(  that this particular meeting was about her advocacy regarding the energy and ecological crises in galar only makes it more so.  feels like she’s shouting --- well, metaphorically --- at a wall.  a wall that’s full of sponsors who don’t want her making waves.  at least raihan is on her side.  )

the SUN & HER FLOWERS  | * accepting /

❝ …..Seriously?Wouldn’t you rather focus on making your life grand? Or at least something you want for yourself. No point in wasting the time you have now, right? ❞

 What an odd guy. Though really he supposed he wasn’t any stranger, talking to what many people deemed as divine beings, who ultimately were to him friends to co-exist with, to strive for a future with, long after his death came for him. 

Geez! That sounded morbid to a boy of natural cheer and vivacity….

But oh, what do you know of your fate, gentle shepherd, you with great power may yet walk like a god, lauded as the awaited messiah who chose the path either spurned or accepted, isolated or integrated, perpetually alone if not for the presence of his Prime Lord, his Sub-Lords, his Squire and his first human friend… oh, and home, Elysia, where the undying seraphim lived; cast in wreathes of green fields and untainted air within Gramp’s domain.

Home, home home home – a beat, gentle voice careful and curious, concerned. 

❝ I uh, mean…sure, if you want that. But that should be a ways down the road, c’mon, you look my age. There’s tons of stuff out there to do and I guess I just don’t understand why you’d want a grand death or focus on it, unless you aren’t but kinda sounds like you are right there.

 It’s not the dying but what we leave behind anyway, right? I’d rather focus on how I live, and how that can continue on after I go. But…maybe I just don’t understand this stuff yet. No, maybe I can’t fathom why you’d say that when you seem pretty alive to me.

 But how you live your life…it’s all about beliefs and choices, ideals and truths we come along the way, huh … so I really can’t dictate you, even if I hope you realize that’s a bit concerning for an outsider to hear. ❞ Sorey glances behind; although really it was to gauge his companions reactions; unseen to most unbelieving eyes, and he wagered no less different with this darkly garbed boy, contrasting to his white ceremonial garb. The Shepherd quirks his brow. 

To be overtly involved in the affairs of mortals or seraphim was a distance he had to tread between; creasing the fate and weight of the world further into a groove between his shoulder blades. Creating a chasm in his white lit heart of pure loneliness that despite wishing to give to taint, malevolence and despair, clung to the hope of fruition.

 Such was the duty and necessity of the ‘Shepherd’ but not of ‘Sorey’ who had to remain neutral even when his heart cried out, for if his light went out, there would be no second chances. 

 But thinking of death seemed strange for now; he had comrades, family waiting for him when this was over….all kinds of things. That’s why he didn’t have his mortality he supposed, on the forefront.

❝ I..guess I haven’t really thought about it. My own death and all. Maybe you have a point..I mean you want to choose how you go, right? I guess all I can say is I hope you don’t forget how you’re doing right now. Even our conversation as strangers was interesting! You know? 

It took me a bit to understand but…aren’t you really saying you just want the freedom to choose how you go? 

Then…well, I think I can understand you. Death’s something I’ll have to think about at one point, or whatever kind of existence ending thing happens to me when I get older – I dunno!❞ 

You will never be any older than you are now or will you, will you, will you ever? 

❝ Either way…I guess all I can tell you is good luck. Not with uh, dying soon or anything, I can’t get behind that, I hope you live a good, long life before you leave behind stuff people could talk about!

But I’m sure if you’re passionate about dying, you’re passionate in your own way about living your own way too! I don’t really think it’s my place to judge you for that, just….be careful, yeah? There’s only one of you. ❞ 

The concern flits to a somber understanding a mirror second in verdant green before Sorey offers a cheery smile regardless. Nodding once and shifting his head to fully flash that calm but gentle smile.

 He sure hoped this guy was going to be alright…forcing him to have the same zest for life that he did…well, that wasn’t something he could do. That wasn’t reality. 

They take some marshmallows and Lillian’s smile alights.  It seems to really cheer the stranger up, too!!  (  everybody loves mini marshmallows.  )  She pops a few in her mouth herself, and then the bag’s set between the two of them in apparent offering.  In case they want any more!

She’s never seen this person around before, which wouldn’t have been so rare a month or two ago, but she spends a great deal of time in Hammerlocke these days, and feels like she’s memorized most of the familiar faces.  Trying to get their names down, too --- especially the little ones who are fans.  Leon knowing her made her feel stronger.  She wants to do the same for them!!  Either way, it’s odd that she can’t remember this distinctive person from...anywhere, and odder yet that they haven’t recognized her.  She wonders if they’re just not a fan of the Gym Challenge...maybe an out - of - towner?