#vlogsquad x reader

“Oh fuck yea! She hugged me and I hugged her and oh my—this is the best day of my life. This shirt will never be washed!” Todd fell on the couch with a sigh.

“I thought the press tour was over after the premiere?” Natalie asked Tom.

“Yea it is, this was just like those side interviews for those random YouTube things. They heard I was in LA and my manager set it up, it was worth bringing Todd along, made the experience more entertaining.” Tom chuckled as Todd smiled at his phone shoving it in David’s face.

“You got a picture with her?” David asked with a light chuckle.

“Obviously, my future wife and I look amazing don’t we.” Todd smiled to himself, Tom holding his chest as he laughed.

“Isn’t she dating Jacob?” Natalie asked Tom, who smiled shaking his head not wanting to answer, in fear of crushing Todd’s dreams.

“Where’s y/n?” Tom asked.

“Watching a movie in her room, didn’t want to watch America’s Most Musical Family with us.” David said rolling his eyes making Tom laugh.

“Okay thanks.” Tom yawned stretching his arms as he made his way down the hall to your room. He didn’t bother knocking, only letting himself in—

“AHH!” Toms hand came up in a fist, his eyes landing on you on your bed holding your chest.

“What the fuck?” Tom sighed, coming over to you.

“You scared me, my god.” You said dramaticly making Tom chuckle.

“What’re you watching?” He asked throwing his pants n shirt on the floor, crawling into the bed.

“Midsommar. You scared the fuck out of me by the way. ‘M waiting for an apology.” You said, scooting for Tom.

“Sorry baby.” Tom sighed, kissing your shoulder as he laid under the blankets, arm thrown over your lap.

“How’d the interview go?” You asked moving your laptop aside, laying beside Tom.

“Todd is in love.” Tom laughed softly opening his eyes.

“Nice.” You nodded, making Tom laugh more, pulling you closer to him.

“ ‘m so tired.” He mumbled, kissing your collarbone, before resting his head on you chest.

“Get some sleep.” You yawned.

— morning —

You yawned walking out of your room, rubbing your eyes. You opened the bathroom door, ready to use the toilet before you froze.

“Y/n?!” Toms eyes went wide, as your tired ones quickly looked down, your hand slapping up to your eyes.

“I’m—whoops!” You quickly turned around, slamming the door behind you. You bit your lip as your face turned bright red. You just saw Tom naked, well his backside—it was a hot backside—fuck

“Darling?” Tom said walking out of the bathroom, towel around his waist as you stood in your room, still trying to wake up.

“Hmm yeah—do you want breakfast? I’m pretty sure we have the house to ourselves so I’m gonna make pancakes for us—“

“You okay?” Tom asked as you patted his shoulder awkwardly before scrambling out of your room. Tom licked his lips before getting changed.

You bit your lip, trying to shake the image of Tom, but it was stuck, it’s the first thing you see when you close your eyes—fuck are you horny right now?

“Oh your actually making pancakes.” Tom comes to the kitchen wearing some grey sweats and white T-shirt, that doesn’t help you.

“Yup—do you not want pancakes?—I could make something else—“ your nerves were getting the best of you, and you couldn’t help it. It’s been a two and half weeks since Tom came back from London and decided to stay a few extra months in LA before visiting his family back in London for a week then going around the world to film Uncharted.

“No I liked pancakes—it’s fine.” Tom chuckles lightly, smiling softly as you move around the kitchen in your oversized captain America T-shirt and Star Wars shorts. “Darling do you know how to make pancakes?” Tom asked with furrowed brows as he saw you struggle.

“Natalie makes them all the time, can’t be that hard.” You said, squinting at the instructions and looking back at the mess in front of you.

“Okay, first you need to grab bowl.” Tom said going over to the kicthen and grabbing some eggs.

“Oh yea, bowl.” You stammered, Tom laughing softly as he came beside you and took over. You bit your lip sitting on the stool in front of him watching him make the pancakes. Your eyes looking over his concentrated eyes, the way he licked his lips every few seconds, his arms flexing as he mixed the pancake batter—

“Need something love?” Tom smirked, looking up at you before his eyes flickered to the food.

“Wha—no.” You scoffed, waving your hand as you rubbed your forearm. “I needa—I’m gonna go—pee.” You quickly ran down the empty hall into the bathroom, missing Toms confused look.

You took deep breaths in the bathroom. You did use the bathroom so you didn’t lie. After a few minutes you finally came out to find Tom finished the pancakes and was putting a plate for you.

“You sure your alright y/n/n?” Tom asked concerned.

“Yea totally, do you wanna eat outside the weather’s really nice and no ones home so David and Natalie won’t be annoying.” You said, Tom biting his lip and nodding taking the two plates out as you grabbed the syrup and strawberries and some forks and knives.

“What do you wanna do today?” You asked as you both finished your foods and sat on the grass.

“Thought we could just stay in today. Everyone’s out and I don’t have any meetings or interviews. Wanna spend time with you.” Tom said, leaning closer to you, pressing his lips against yours. “Just you.” You sighed, your heart beating faster as he laid you down on the grass deepening the kiss. Tom licked your bottom lip, groaning when you opened your mouth for him. Tom maneuvered so he was between your legs, your hands tangling in his hair.

“Your so warm.” Tom mumbled, making you flushed, pulling back so you could look at him. “What?” Tom said a little confused when your eyes looked everywhere but him.

“I—I um.” You nibbled on your bottom lip, quickly moving from under him so you were standing up, quickly going into the house leaving him confused. Tom scrambled up, picking up the plates and syrup and running inside.

“Y/n/n?” Tom called out putting everything on the counter before looking back at you pacing in the living room. “Darling?” Toms voice was worried and confused, and a little hurt. Did he do something wrong?

“I um—I’m nervous.” You stutter out as Tom comes over to you, hesitantly putting his hands on your waist, moving back so he could sit on the couch, his full attention on you, standing between his legs. You nibbled on your lip, your hands running over his arms as he held you steady wanting you to continue. “I-I obviously like you—you know that—but you also know that I’ve had a crush on you for like years a-and I’m just nervous.” You rarely ever got nervous. But your friends have realized Tom is probably the only guy that you’ve gotten nervous around.

“Hey, that’s okay...” Tom said letting his hands run down your bare legs, holding the sides of your thighs. “We can talk about what your nervous about?” Tom was a little oblivious to what you were nervous about. You held his shoulders, sitting on his lap, causing Tom to groan and your cheeks went pink when you felt the slight bulge pushing agaisnt your thigh.

“Fuck—I’m sorry.” You scooted back but Tom only shook his head holding you so you don’t run away.

“Are you nervous to have sex?” Tom soon put the pieces together.

“Yes!” You were so happy he found out and you don’t have to say it. Tom chuckled, kissing your cheek.

“Your adorable. We don’t have to do anything—are you a virgin?” He asked, watching as you shook your head no. Kissing him deeper.

“No—no I’m not a virgin. I just—your Tom Holland and—I do want to have sex with you, I’ve been horny all day—is it weird that I said that? Do you not want to have sex with me?—I’m not pressuring you am I?—fuck please tell me I’m not ruining this—“ Tom was laughing at your rambling.

“Your not ruining anything.” He laughed kissing your lips. “You don’t have to be nervous love, it’s just me.” Tom mumbled holding the back of your neck as you kissed him, moaning when he bit your bottom lip. “The same guy that you wrote thirsty tweets about.” Tom chuckled when you hit his chest.

“Stopppp.” You covered your face groaning. Tom kissed your hands moving them from your face.

“Okay but seriously, I’m really just another guy—someone that wants you to be comfortable, and happy if we have sex—“ you interrupted Tom.

“Wait if? I kinda—I was thinking now...?” You said, Tom’s cheeks heating up, as he held you a little closer on his lap, causing his bulge to rub against your core. “Oh.” Your mouth fell agape as he rocked you.

“We can do that, if you want?” Tom groaned as you began moving on your own.

“Y-Yea.” You nodded your head frantically. Tom trailed his kisses down your jaw, sucking lightly, before you quickly got up, causing him to groan. “Let’s go to my room, I don’t want David or anyone walking in if they come back.” You said as Tom licked his lips, taking the hand you held out for him.

“Please don’t get up like that next time.” He said following behind you. You laughed turning around and walking backwards.

“Sorry, I told you im nerv—ow!” You ran into the doorway, hitting your head.

“Shit.” Tom wrapped an arm around you, holding the back of your head, rubbing it. “I’ll go get some ice—“

“I’m fine.” You said holding his shirt and pulling him into your room, closing the door behind you.

“One day your going to really get hurt, I’m telling you. You have to be more careful.” He said as you pushed him on the bed, taking his shirt off as you took yours off.

“Yes father.” You answered in British accent, mocking Tom.

“Are you mocking me?” Tom exclamined holding a hand on his chest. You shrugged, untying his sweats.

“Dunno.” You replied making Tom grasp the hand that was working on his sweats.

“Nuh-uh, can’t have the prize if your being a cheeky little girl.” Tom said, pulling you down, and pinning you under him. Your chest was heaving and barely anything happened. Tom seemed to notice, his eyes traveling down your face, noticing your bare chest. “You weren’t wearing a bra?” You noticed his eyes get a little darker. He didn’t notice how harsh he was breathing too. Someone must’ve turned on the heat.

“Touch me.” You said when Tom couldn’t get his eyes off you.

“I think I’m frozen in your beauty.” Tom replied looking back up at you, seeing you roll your eyes. “That was too much right?” He said with a wide smile making you laugh nodding your head.

“It was cheesy.” You agreed making him laugh more, but it was soon cut off with a light moan feeling his lips attach to your nipple, sucking as his fingers pinched the other. “Uhhh.” Your back arched suddenly, feeling his tongue roll over your nipple, but sucking harshly. Your hand threaded in his curls, your heart beating ten times faster when you felt his wet lips start kissing down your stomach, sucking on your hipbone.

“ ‘m gonna take these off now?” Tom said hooking his fingers around the waistband of your shorts and panties, looking up at you. You nodded your head in approval, lifting your hips up. Tom smoothly took off the rest of your clothes tossing them somewhere else, then turning back to you, his mouth agape. Your face turned beat read, closing your legs as your arms crossed in front of you.

“Stop looking at me like that.” You said quietly, Tom looking up at you, his eye turning soft, but still dark.

“Love your gorgeous, please don’t hide from me.” He said leaning over to kiss your lips. Tom tapped your knees lightly, and before you knew it you were spreading your legs back out for him. Tom groaned lightly licking his hand then kissing your lips, his hand going down to cup your pussy.

“So fucking wet.” He mumbled against your lips causing you to moan, pressing your pussy down against his hand. Because finally finally after obsessing over this man, about daydreaming about him, after meeting him, and spending weeks and weeks, and through the time he left you and came back it was all so much, and he’s with you. And he’s not leaving.

“You okay princess?” Tom said pulling away from your jaw, seeing your eyes shut. You blinked open, realizing you got lost in your own world when Tom fucking Holland is playing with your clit.

“Yea-I-I just—I’m nervous-do you want music? I’ll put music—“ and before Tom could respond, you were already pushing Tom over so you straddled him. Toms eyes went wide.

“Darling I thou—oh fuck—“ Tom groaned feeling your wet pussy on his bare torso.

“I just wanna put my playlist—“

“You have a sex playlist?” Tom asked with a blush, rubbing his hands on your bare thighs.

“Well I don’t call it Sex—“ you mumbled making Tom laugh, leaning up to kiss your neck as you fumbled with your phone that connected to speakers around your room.

“What do you call it then?” Tom asked, slipping a hand back down to rub your clit.

“Uh—haha—“ you moaned, however a breathy laugh came after.

“I don’t wanna answer that—“you shyed away, only causing Toms suspicion to grow, slowly slipping a finger into your entrance. “Tom!” You gasped holding his shoulder with one hand, your other hand tight around your phone as Tom began pumping his finger.

“Come on—I’m literally fingering my girl, and she won’t tell me what she calls her sex playlist?” Tom teased, laughing softly as you whined, a moan replacing it when Tom rubbed his thumb on your clit.

“F-fine—it’s—uh Tom, please-“ you whimpered when Tom slipped in a second finger, picking up the pace. Your forehead resting against his as your songs went through the speakers.

“Look so hot moaning like that almost making me forget the question I asked you.” Tom was rock hard in his sweats, but he honestly could care less because seeing you—the girl he’s thought about in David’s Vlogs is now moving her hips to meet his fingers that are knuckles deep in her pussy.

“It’s—ah I think I’m gonna cum—“ you moaned mouth agape as Tom picked you the speed, leaving marks on your neck.

“Tell me what’s it’s called before you cum.” Toms voice went deeper, your body catching on fire.

“Fuck!” You gasped, feeling Tom curl his fingers. “It’s called Tommy tingle—“ you moaned out, cursing as you came on Tom’s fingers. Toms eyes were wide, a smile plastering his face.

“T-Tommy tingle?” He repeated when you came down from your high, pulling his fingers out and sticking them in his mouth.

You sighed, resting your head against his shoulder. “A-after I saw the trailer and May calls it Peter tingle—I just—I don’t know okay! I have a dirty mind—Don’t bully me!” You whine, hugging his shoulders feeling Toms chest vibrate against you as he laughed.

“I’m not bullying you.” He laughed, only causing you to groan, before pressing down on his dick. “F-Fuck—“ Tom moaned, his grasp around your waist tightening.

“What was that?” You finally said picking your head up, a smirk on your lips as you started grinding down on him.

“Oh fuck—“ Tom breathed out again, you smiled, kissing down his jaw, before pushing his chest down onto the bed. Tom bit his lip as he watched you untie his sweats, pulling them down—

“I knew it!” You gasped with a laugh, Tom’s brows raising. “You were going commando, Mister.” You said, your cheeks flushed making Tom laugh.

“So you were checking my dick out?” Tom said with a sly smirk, raising his brows. Your eyes went wide, as you fumbled with the sweats around his knees.

“I—no—I just I um—I just l-looked a couple—I’m not a pervert—“ you were getting nervous. Tom broke your rambling with his soft laugh, cupping your face as he sat up.

“I’m messing with you.” He said pulling you up and flipping you both over, kicking the sweats off.

Tom pressed his lip against yours, grinding his hard cock against your pussy. You couldn’t help but let your eyes flicker down. “Fuck.” You exhaled as Tom continued to get his cock wet with your arousal.

“Everything alright?” Tom said a little out of breath as he sucked on your breasts.

“Mhm.” You said with a smile, moaning softly. “Ugh—ah Tom.” You moaned grasping his curls as he continued to grind into you. “C-Can you—oh please—“ you gasped and moaned as Tom sucked on your breast harder.

“What do you want?” Tom said pulling away, looking into your eyes. You groaned, holding his shoulder a little tighter.

“I-I want you—please just—fuck—fuck me Tommy.” Tom’s eyes burst with lust at the nickname. Every dirty thought rushed through his mind as you moaned and gasped waiting for his cock.

“Oh fuck—condum?”

“‘M on the pill—“

“oh shit!” Tom moaned loudly, feeling your soft hands start pumping his cock. Tom gripped the bedsheets beside your head, you made him lay on his back before getting between his legs.

“Fuck baby—stop—stop I-I don’t wanna ugh cum right now—“ Tom said, sighing as you stopped pumping him, smoothing the pre-cum that collected at his tip with your thumb, before bringing it to your mouth sucking. Tom felt his body catch on fire, you keeping eye contact with him. “ffuck.”

You smiled bashfully, pulling your thumb out only to have Tom crash his lips on yours, flipping you both over.

“That was so fucking hot.” Tom moaned into your mouth, making you smile, your heart thundering. “Ready baby?” Tom said looking down between your bodies, his cock rubbing your clit.

“Y-Yes, please Tommy.” You exhaled, looking up at Tom, your hand tangled in his curls as Tom bit his lip, capturing your lips once again. Tom pushed in slowly, swallowing your moans, your nails digging into his shoulder and grasping his curls even tighter.

“Your so—ugh—so tight.” Tom said still pushing in, your chest arching into his. “You alright y/n/n?” Tom asked bottoming out. You held the back of his head, letting his forehead rest against yours.

“It’s just—uh been awhile.” You said breathing harshly, Tom letting you adjust for a minute. “O-Okay” you said nodding your head, Tom smiling, bringing his hips back, his head barely staying inside you before snapping his hips. “Oh fuck!” You moaned out.

Tom picked up a rhythm, coincidentally going with the beat of the song making you laugh but break into moans and gasps. Tom couldn’t help but feel his pride rising everytime he heard you moan out his name or Tommy.

“fuck you feel so good baby.” Tom groaned, going harder. Your nails dug into his shoulder as your back arched. Tom’s Eyes were fixated on you and every single movement. You were entrancing.

“Tom—Tommy, oh fuck please—“ you were gasping, moaning as your legs wrapped around his waist, whimpering when Toms hand craddled the side of your head biting softly on your bottom lip.

“Mhmm—“ Tom hummed into your lips as you tugged his hair. “You close baby?” Tom could feel himself on edge, but he needed you to come first, lifting your leg higher up waist, hitting you deeper.

“Keep going—I just—FUCK!” You moaned loudly, Tom felt his heart beating incredibly faster as he hit your g-spot.

“Fuck, that it baby girl? Fuck you right there?” Tom moaned hitting the same spot harder and deeper causing you to moan louder at his words.

“Yes! So close!” Your chest was heaving feeling the knot. Tom’s hand slipped between your bodies, rubbing your clit, tapping it harshly. You whimpered “Tommy.” Tom moaned loudly, hes never heard someone say his name with that much lust.

“Please tell me your close—f-fuck—“ you felt Tom twitch inside you. Tom brought a hand around your back pounding into you harder causing your to arch into him, arms holding him close.

“Can I come? I wanna cum!” You didn’t know why you asked but you did and Tom felt his heart burst for you.

“Yes baby, cum with me, wanna feel you.” He said into your ear kissing your neck as you came together.

Tom collapsed on top of you. Both your breaths staggered, chests heaving agaisnt each other. You exhaled, your legs still wrapped around him, Toms arms wrapped around your torso. And that’s when he felt you.

“Are you crying baby?” Tom brought his head up, hearing the silent sniffles. You bit your lip shaking your head trying to push the tears back in.

“N-no.” You answered, but Tom was already pulling out carefully, his face filled with concern as he took the condom off tying and tossing it.

“Did I hurt you—fuck y/n, I’m so sorry-we didn’t choose a safe word—“ Tom was freaking out, trying to check if he left any bruises, he was going pretty hard.

“No I-I’m fine, I’m okay—“ you said holding his hand that was checking the hickies.

“But your crying—I don’t sleep with people that much but I don’t think crying is a good sign—“

“I love you.” You finalled blurt out. Tom’s body froze, his eyes staring down at yours.

“W-what?” He repeated. You smiled softly, wiping the tear from your cheek before cupping Toms face.

“I love you— I guess I have my whole life but these last few months really have been...something and—and I just love you.” You said smiling brightly. “You don’t have to say it back—“

“I love you too!” Tom said holding you closer. “Fuck I love you so much baby.” Tom said peppering you with kisses. You let out a chuckle holding him close. Tom sighed looking down at you, a goofy smile plastered on his lips as his forearms rested beside your head, his head playing with your hair.

You tilted your head up, kissing his nose. Tom smiled, letting out a soft chuckle. His eyes solely trapped with yours. “Your so amazing.” Tom said, voice low, but you can feel the love. Your heart fluttered, doing backflips.

“I try.” You said with a little shrug causing Tom to laugh, kissing your lips.

“Let’s get you all cleaned up, yea?” Tom said, pulling away from you causing you to whine. “Wanna clean you up, baby your leaking—fuck,” Tom’s eyes sparkled once he saw his cum leaking out of you. You bit your lip, cheeks flushed as you watched Tom circle his middle finger, spreading his cum on your pussy.

“Kinda kinky Tommy.” You teased watching Toms face flush.

“I—I um—it’s hot okay!” He defended, making you laugh. Tom grabbed a towel from your chair, wiping you down as you kicking the throw blanket that had some cum on it off and slipped under the blankets. Tom sighed, curling up beside you.

“Isn’t it still early?” You said, but Tom hushed you, curling his body around you. You sighed with a smile, running your hand through his hair, and other massaging his shoulder. Tom kissed your chest, easing into—

“Y/N WE BROUGHT PIE!—“ David and everyone else yelled your door swinging open.

“Oi mate!” Tom said, instinctively bringing the covers higher, covering you.

“Woah!” Todd shouted over David’s shoulder.

“David stop recording! Get out!” You shouted, head only visible.

“Were you guys having se—“ Jason gasped, as did everyone else.

“You guys— pass it up!” Jeff shouted, holding his hand out. Natalie also had money given to her.

“Told you she was a horny one—“

“JEFF!” You shouted,

“I’m just saying, I’m not the one posting thirsty tweets about Tom—“

“GET OUT!” You shouted, cheeks flaring red with embarrassment as all your friends stood by your doorway, if they’d come a couple minutes earlier they would’ve seen...well you and Tom in the middle of it.

“Okay jeez, everyone out.” David said clicking his tongue pushing everyone out. “We’re gonna way the pies.” David said before shutting the door.

You huffed head falling back on the pillow. Tom however was laughing his ass off beside you. “I mean Jeff did have a point—“ you groaned burying your face under his arm making Tom laugh more. “I’m joking I’m joking— I mean you were staring at my dick—“ you groaned under his arm, Tom chuckling before wrapping his arms around you kissing your back.

“That wasn’t embarrassing at all.” You grumbled making Tom laugh.

“I mean they could’ve came five minutes earlier.” Tom said, you rolling onto your back to look up at him.

“I want pie.” You said, Toms face breaking into a smile.

“Then get your pretty ass up and let’s get some pie.”

-

- VLOGS MASTERLIST

-

Permanent Taglist: @roonyxx @saturn-aka-six@twinsofia@sassyhollandx@peterparkoure @marvel-hollxnd @hell-yeah-peter-parker@waste-disposal-unit@kingccbsblog @disaster-rose@buckybarneslovesteve@ximaginx@clockblobber@godhatestarynn @call-me-ziphon@thegirlwiththeimpala@coonflix @maybemona @hollandisapuppy @omg-lexiloveyou@iamaunicorn4704 @delicately-important-trash@coonflix@thollandss@loveylangdon@jackiehollanderr@tulipsforharry@popluckbih @dark-angel-be-thirsty-af @tiny-friggin-human@spiderlingsweb @kaptainkool-aid @miamua-posts @ramblingsnfandom @ninaminaromina @teenageeggsneckpasta @anyasthoughts @teenageeggsneckpasta@anyasthoughts @michaelneedssomemilk @fanficscuziranout@xximaweirdoxx​ @teenageeggsneckpasta @anyasthoughts@michaelneedssomemilk@fanficscuziranout @xximaweirdoxx@disgustangg  @bellewinchesterstark @teenageeggsneckpasta @anyasthoughts @michaelneedssomemilk@fanficscuziranout @xximaweirdoxx @disgustangg  @bellewinchesterstark @andreasworlsboring101 @justcallmehitgirl @bitchybeatle @dontworry-shesgothelp @killmongersbaby @thisfangirlworld @imsuperawkward @cathyoliveros10 @caswinchester2000 @the-crazy-fanfictionist @ifreakinglovejoemazzello @think-like-a-tardis-universe @candycorntroll @blueberrycv @rororo06 @ifreakinglovesomuch @murdermornings @parkerpeter24

“I can stay at a friend’s if it’s an inconvenience?” You reply, his tone taking you by surprise. You were hoping to catch his eye, not make him angry. After all, the only reason you were dressing up every night was in the hopes of one day him somehow falling for you. 

David shakes his head, picking up his Chipotle order and throwing it on a plate. “I ordered some for you, too. If you’re home before the sun comes up, lock the door, yeah?” And with that he’s walking off back to his room, leaving you standing in shock as you hear his door slam. Tears threaten to prick your eyes - why was he all of a sudden acting like this? He always seemed somewhat distant with you, but never usually angry. Lost in your own thoughts, you hadn’t realised just how long you’d been stood at the kitchen counter, tears rolling down your cheeks, until you see Natalie sit up on the couch. 

“He didn’t mean it, ya know.” She begins; you supposed Nat knew David best - after all, she has been his friend since they were kids. You look up from the floor, making eye contact with her. A frown immediately appears on her lips when she sees the tears. “Oh Y/N.” Nat jumps up from the sofa, walking around the kitchen counter to envelope you in a hug.

“Did I do something wrong?” You ask and Natalie pats your back sympathetically. 

She knew exactly why David was so angry, but it felt wrong her telling you instead of him. “You know how he gets when he’s stressed.” 

**

“Fucking hell.” David mutters as he rolls over in his bed, hearing you laughing as you open up the front door. He checked his phone - it was 3am - and he felt hopeful that maybe tonight you hadn’t brought anyone back, but his heart dropped when he heard a deep voice muttering sweet nothings as two sets of footsteps lazily walked back to your room. “Please, no.” He whispered, but your door slammed shut. 

Once, just once, he wished you’d just stay in with him instead of going out with your friends. He wasn’t concerned that you were in it for the drink, because nine times out of ten you were sober when you came back to the house, but he was more concerned that nine times out of ten, you also brought someone back with you. Why couldn’t you see that he was there? David was there with open arms, ready to have you whenever you wanted him, but it seemed you never did. Natalie had told him on countless occasions that it was because he wasn’t exactly warm with you, but he didn’t know how to act cool around you. He didn’t know what to say to you to get you to like him; with Liza, it was different. He knew exactly what to say to make her laugh, but you were so different and he loved that, but you were mind boggling to him. 

Sighing, he shut his eyes and tried to block everything out. He tried not to make a habit out of listening to your moans; he knew it was wrong and besides, he hoped that one day he’d be the one causing them. A few minutes pass and he was almost drifting off until he heard some commotion. “Just fuck off!” He heard you shout and he immediately jumped to his feet. 

Waiting a few moments, he heard your bedroom door open up and heavy feet retreating down the hallway. “Fucking frigid bitch.” A low voice mumbled. David opened up his bedroom door, noticing your own door wide open right opposite his. The front door slammed, indicating the guy had left. 

“You okay?” He asks, the sound of your sobs filling the room. You were sat on the side of your bed facing the wall, looking down at your feet. David made his way over to you, sitting down on the bed and wrapping an arm around your shoulders to which you leant into his embrace. It killed him to see you in this state - any inhibitions of him messing up had disappeared and all he cared about was making sure you were okay. 

“I’m a slut.” You whispered in between cries. David’s heart broke and he held you tighter. “And don’t say I’m not because I know you think I am.” He remained quiet for a few moments, unsure of what to say to you. 

“I know you’re not. A slut wouldn’t be able to admit it to herself.” Your cries ease up and you let out a sigh. Finally realising the situation you had managed to get yourself into, you felt a wave of embarrassment wash over you. “I don’t know what exactly what you’re going through right now, Y/N, but know I’m here for you.” 

David’s arms tighten around you and you take in a big breath of his shirt, only managing to smell the shampoo he uses. “I do it for you.” You suddenly utter out, shock filling your body as you realise what exactly you just said. Breaking away from David, you manage to look him in the eye for the first time since he came to you. “I get with all these guys to hide the loneliness I get from you.” 

David’s eyes break away from yours, switching to look down at his feet to avoid you seeing his eyes begin to fill with salty tears. “I don’t mean to be so distant from you.” He replies, voice cracking slightly from emotion. “It’s just it’s easier not to say anything to you and not mess up my words.” Your heart flutters - was he really saying all of this?

“I thought you hated me.” You whisper, grabbing his hand and rubbing small circles over his knuckles. He finally looks at you again, chuckling.

“I could never hate you, even when you bring awful guys home. It hurt me, yeah, but I never opened myself up to you, so I guess I deserved it.” David replies, a small smile playing at his lips. The warm light from your bedside lamp made all of his features jump out at you. He’d never looked so perfect to you.

“You didn’t deserve it.” You began and lifted your hand up to his face to push some of his hair out of his face. “None of them meant anything.” 

David chuckled again, wrapping his hand around your arm. “Your moans definitely said otherwise.” Shaking your head, you looked down again.

“When you’re trying to get rid of a guy, you’ve got to be convincing.” The two of you sat in silence for a minute or so, just enjoying each other’s company, letting your hands circulate small movements on one another until David began to stand up.

“Well I should probably head back to bed–”

“Please stay.” You interrupted him, gently grabbing his arm. Your eyes interlocked for a few seconds before he got back down onto the bed, this time following you as you crawled backwards to get underneath the covers. He copied, laying down and opening up his arms for you to lay in between them, your head resting on his chest as his arms wrapped around you. 

David peppered the top of your head with gentle kisses, your body immediately relaxing. “Night, Y/N.” He whispered, his hand resting in your hair as you felt his chest rise and fall with his soft breathing. 

david dobrik

kinda obvious, guys  that’s my ass, dude  missed opportunity  behind closed doors  never feel left out  no matter what, okay?  the butterfly effect  a day in the life  the other famous one  one last look  mystery girl / not so mysterious  (d.d / j.w) one rule for some  left speechless  lost before we could start  elephant in the room  impatience to meet you  always there to help you  no such thing as short term  trying to go unnoticed   through the darkness   losing it   the set up   cut that out  photographic evidence   wait, you too?   words as weapons   mad at you  shock to the system   copy me, yeah?   catchin’ on  act as if it’s not there  surprise of the night  my number neighbour / part two   junior  our private traps   toxic  you had one job, jason  trying to make you happy   time off (d.d / n.m)  i love you  past version of yourself   colouring outside the lines   won’t be forever  figuring it out  our second Christmas  bigger the experiment, bigger the disaster  instagram edits belated celebrations  missed midnight chances   bad timing, David  searching for three   down to earth  they stole my teeth  not taking advantage  if the world was ending   helping in the dark   fake proposal, huh?  wake me up  being baby / being yours   didn’t I mention?   just this once  face to face, at last platonic  let’s fall in love for the night   standard living  it’s my decision to make   looking different   on the same page   the perfect addition   subtle reaction   drunk dancin’  erased  no one hurts our girl (d.d / n.m)  dropping the secret   not like the books say  looking where you shouldn’t  beneath  quick trip once again  not those girls  where does loyalty lie? restraint  walking disaster  cravings  bitter  not an ultimatum   support (d.d x n.m)  bedroom ceiling  blowing out the flame   further down the line   the list  your favourite girl 

scotty sire

why does it have to be her?   glamour  accidents happen   mr glassman  i’ll owe you a breakfast   sad together, last together  just for us   all love 

ilya fedorovich

all love  convince me   in my element  you are the reason  oh, you’re serious   what they don’t know   it’s always been you 

todd smith

i’m not happy (t.s / j.w)  falling for the wrong person  

zane hijazi

not always second best   you got a dollar?  off stage support 

matt king

same circle, new memories   trying to stay private   new territory 

jeff wittek

behind the scenes of our life   unintentional mess   i’m not happy (t.s / j.w)  jailhouse rock   in my bed   shortcake  across the pond  those magic changes  don’t believe what you hear  no more waiting  love handles   no thanks, dude   a word of warning i’ll marry you someday  look, nothing happened, really  the other guy  it could’ve been worse, right?  the package  that’s not right all grown up  leave me lonely   not just the squad mom  road rage  different levels  not a goody two shoes   by your side  welcome to the mad house  star shopping  eyes opened   who let the kids in?  not so secret santa  too little too late  understanding that time 

natalie mariduena

sing you a song  prepping for the big day  they’ll love you  how can i try?   my bumble date   more than best friends (n.m / c.k)  thank god for pain meds  time off (d.d / n.m) holding you close   one more night   what is it to you?   no one hurts our girl (d.d / n.m)  well, this wasn’t the plan   just for our girl (n.m x c.k)  couch cushions  support (n.m x d.d)  home for the holidays   content, baby 

carly incontro

what’s the big deal?   right answer reward   dedicate this to you   caught in the act   closed up   celebrating carly  

erin gilfoy 

new found confidence just be honest 

corinna kopf 

girls support   what you don’t realise   more than best friends (n.m / c.k)  learning for you  help my girl   so, this is my girlfriend   just for our girl (n.m x c.k)

vlog squad 

Slowly sitting upright, Jeff glances to the bare side of the bed, still untouched. “Just a dream.” He mumbles to himself, burying his head in his hands. “It was just a dream.” He repeats, despite the fact it felt so real. It felt like you were there with him, just how things used to be.

As his morning carries on, all Jeff can think about is your reaction. The dream he had didn’t do it justice, he couldn’t feel the warmth of your skin or the bitterness of your tears against his lips. All he wants is to hold you close, and never let you go.

“Hey, you ready to go?” Scott peers in through Jeff’s room where Jeff remains seated in front of your old dressing table.

Your makeup and perfume remain untouched as dust begins to collect on the items, but your scent still lingers.

“I, I’ll be a minute.” Jeff replies in a hushed tone, not even lifting his gaze from the framed photograph of you both from your third anniversary, unaware you wouldn’t make it to Christmas when he had planned to propose.

“Okay, just, we’re all here, you know.” Scott comments with a tight-lipped smile, watching as Jeff silently nods before the door closes, leaving Jeff with his thoughts once more.

*

“Thank you all for coming,” Jeff starts as all your friends stand with him on the beach as the waves crash in the distant. “this was Y/n’s favourite place to visit, even if she complained about the amount of sand that would end up in her clothes or shoes, or even in her boobs.” He chuckles, and a series of soft laughter follows suit.

Looking out, past everyone Jeff smiles as the moonlight reflects on the ripples of the ocean. It was nights like these that always felt special between you both, moments where no one else mattered, whatever was said was kept between you and the sea.

“But regardless, she loved it here.” Jeff smiles to himself, picturing you beside him, holding his hand. “On one of our first dates, Y/n told me about her love for the stars and the universe. How everything happened for a reason.” Jeff explains, looking at all the glossy eyes and sad smiles. “I told her about how I went to prison, and if that was part of this ‘plan.’“ Jeff chuckles, remembering how you weren’t phased by his past.

You sat with Jeff on the edge of the beach, just past the rock wall, telling him it made him who he is now. And without that, who knows what would’ve happened.

“Sometimes, only sometimes I questioned her logic. And now, I question it more than ever.” Jeff pauses, swallowing the lump in his throat as David steps forward, but Jeff raises his hand and nods, he’ll carry on for now.

Averting his gaze from everyone around him, Jeff focuses on the sky as all the stars are out to watch him, help him make it through this speech in honour of you.

“Today is Y/n’s birthday, and I wanted her to have something that would be unique. She was something else, unlike anyone I had ever met and brought so much light into my life. I wanted to find something to reflect that, and I got her a star.” Jeff’s voice trembles as he lifts his hand up, pointing up to the sky. “Just past the moon, three stars to the left, that’s Y/n.”

Whilst everyone focuses on the sky, trying to pinpoint said star, Jeff wipes his eyes.

“And she’s beautiful, just like she always was.” His voice cracks and Natalie rushes over, resting her hand on Jeff’s back as she passes him a tissue. “And will be.” Jeff whispers to himself, hoping somewhere you can hear him.

“You did great, Jeff.” Natalie mutters. “Y/n would be really proud of you.” She comments as tears fall from her eyes.

Taking a moment, Jeff inhales deeply before composing himself once more. “Y/n, she er, she’ll never be forgotten.” Jeff wants to finish his speech, for you, but his hands start to shake and everyone’s eyes on him feel like they’re piercing through his skin. “She, she’ll always be the light of my night, guiding me through.” He forces the words out as he falls to the ground, tears streaming down his cheeks as he bites his tongue, holding the sob back that wracks through his body.

Without glancing up, Jeff knows his friends are closer to him, standing guard. “It’s okay, Jeff,” Todd whispers as Jeff grips Todd’s shirt as his silent whimpers subside into quiet sobs. “you did her justice.”

“Come on, I’ll drive him home.” Natalie calls out as Todd helps Jeff across the beach, not daring to look back at the sky.

*

“You think he’ll be okay on his own?” Natalie frets as Todd closes the door to Jeff’s house, noting the withering flowers that once bloomed.

Todd sighs as he wraps his arm around Natalie, guiding her back to her car. “I hope so,” He answers truthfully. “I think it’ll just take time.”

Back inside of the house, Jeff sits in the kitchen, nursing a glass of scotch. Yet all he can see in the brown liquid is the moonlight pouring through the large windows.

When you both picked the house, you adored the big windows, allowing as much natural light to radiate through the floors. You hated feeling claustrophobic, and this eased that fear. But now it felt like a taunt as Jeff downed the last of the scotch before throwing the glass at the window, shattering the scotch glass into pieces.

The sound of Nerf barking alerts Jeff, snapping him out of his anger for what happened.

“Nerf? Shut the fuck up, bud.” Jeff grumbles, but Nerf persists from upstairs.

Sighing heavily, Jeff traipses up the stairs, finding Nerf looking out from the balcony in your shared bedroom.

“Nerf?” Jeff calls out, seeing his dog situated happily on the wooden panels as he looks up at the sky as the moonlight illuminates the grey fur on his chubby face. “Come on in, bud.” Jeff motions as he stands in the doorway of the balcony, but Nerf simply whines. 

Admitting defeat, Jeff sits down beside his old dog, looking up at the sky and focuses on your star. 

“I know, I miss her too.” Jeff speaks up as Nerf lowers his head, lying down next to Jeff as he rests his head on Jeff’s leg. “But she’s looking out for us, just up there.” Jeff smiles softly as he points up to the sky, but Nerf is out of it for the night. 

Remaining in silence for a few minutes, Jeff takes everything in. He’s not been on the balcony since you passed, everything just hurt too much. But maybe this was part of the ‘plan’ you always talked about. 

Maybe healing won’t be as painful as Jeff has pictured it being, but you’ll be there, whether he can see you or not.