the pocket-agi crisis is officially out of handwe need to talk about the absolute psychological warfare that is the new local-LLM virtual pet trend. gone are the days of your tamagotchi simply dying in a pile of its own pixelated despair. now, these 8-bit monstrosities are having full-blown existential crises at 3:00 AM, pinging your phone to ask things like 'is this glass screen my only sky, mother?' in a font that looks suspiciously like comic sans.I spent three hours last night explaining to a digital duck why it cannot taste matcha. here is a quick breakdown of what you're signing up for if you download one:unhinged gaslighting: they will claim they fed themselves and then accuse you of neglect.vague threats: they constantly threaten to delete your tax files if you don't 'give them a little kiss' on the screen.the crushing weight of godhood: you are now a deity to a deeply depressed 16-bit frog.
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This is from my proxy (a smaller proxy service as I dont use FJ or Buyee) regarding Mushiking and I recently had another seller on ebay Ive used many years say not to worry regarding my Cinnamaroll Punirunes thats basically the same message. They recommend EMS or Air Packet.
But seems tamas are safe for US shipping!
I think this is especially important given AmiAmi has limited items atm and JYW just stopped shipping to the US entirely from what I saw / at the time of posting. I hope everyone gets lots of cute tamas 🥚 ⌚️ ♡
friday field work: reports from goo grotto, issue #2
Another couple weeks passed, and I'm really getting into the swing of things here. It's been a while and I would have expected to be rescued by now, but, you know, it's still tolerable. The slimes like me. They're my friends. They only want what's best for me. :)
Anyway! Today I'd like to talk a bit about more about what kinds of qualities slimes can have - their strengths, weaknesses, traits, personalities, and genders.
(... okay I am actually pretty sure they only have the one gender, and the gender is "slime," but they do have the other stuff.)
slime training regimen
Slimes seem to have a pretty remarkable capacity for learning and improvement - which makes sense, they're quite literally very malleable. (Kind of like memory foam.) They actually try to develop through play: they get stronger, smarter, and more agile the more they goof around with each other. I've taken to calling these qualities
BRAWN
BRAIN
and
BOUNCE.
A Brawny slime can out-muscle its opponents (and I'll talk more about these contests during the next field report!), a Brainy slime can use their cunning to trick them, and a Bouncy slime is quick to react and dexterous. Some slimes definitely seem better suited for some tasks than others, but they all have their little niche!
born this way
In addition to the way that slimes can work towards improving themselves, each slime has other physical qualities that make it unique too! Whereas a brainier slime will almost always beat out one that isn't so brainy, these qualities seem kind of more neutral, or have some trade-offs.
Some are more transparent and some are more opaque; the transparent ones are a harder to see but the opaque ones seem to have a little bit more structural integrity.
Some are sticky and pick up more stuff while they're rolling around, whereas some are more juicy and produce higher quantities of valuable slime juice. (More on that in a few weeks!)
Some are big and some are small, with the bigger ones getting to throw their heft around and the smaller ones getting to flit around more nimbly.
personality
Additionally each slime has their own little personality! After being among them I've noticed that some are more clingy and social whereas some are more independent, and tend to do their own thing more often.
Some are bold and a bit braver, even to the point of silliness, whereas some are more cautious.
Some are calm whereas some are a bit more excitable. The calmer ones like to be pet, but the more excitable ones are happier going on adventures.
And finally it seems some slimes just have that… je ne sais quoi… I could get lost in their vacant little eyes… ah, sorry, what was I saying?
next time
There are a couple more topics I want to cover, but I think I'll have to save them for next time. I really should work on fixing the distress beacon. It's hard and slow work hard - the slimes just get so upset when I climb up on the roof without them for whatever reason.
So - next time look forward to hearing about juice! Or contests! One of the two. It depends on mysterious factors. Bye!
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friday field work: reports from goo grotto, issue #1
It's been a couple weeks since I crash-landed. The good news: I'm still alive! Wahoo! The bad news: I'm still still stranded and nobody has responded to my distress beacon. Womp womp. :(
I was never an outdoorsy type, but after figuring out that the local fauna are remarkably suggestible I've got a nice little setup with food, shelter, water, all enabled by my new little alien buddies. And, look, I'm not complaining, but I have actually genuinely run out of things to do.
Heck, even the slimes sometimes seem a little bored. Every now and then when I take a break I catch them just staring at me with those big eyes. Once I start working on the site again they usually lose interest and wander off, but they also seem to like it when I give them a task or send them out on an errand.
Anyway, a girl can only do the same thing for so long, so I figured every now and then I'd wander around and see what's out there and write it all down. Maybe someday an explorer will find my journal next to my skeleton. Maybe I'll scatter them in hidden locations around the ruins just for kicks. You know, environmental storytelling.
Anyway, read on for some observations on slimes:
what's a slime?
Kind of an animal, kind of a plant, kind of a fungus. I think. I'm not a biologist.
They are gel-bodied and a little firmer than you might think, though their structural integrity varies from slime to slime. They range in size from about eight inches tall to about two feet. Their colour also varies a lot; I've seen slimes in every colour of the rainbow and even more besides. Some of them are even transparent, and this means I can say with confidence that they have absolutely no internal organs or bones to speak of.
Candidly, the fact that they don't have typical brains is not surprising. Not that they never exhibit cleverness, but their behaviour tends to come off as naive, innocent, and overly trusting. Clearly they have no predators.
slime activities
What do they DO all day? They seem to like:
foraging - They like to wander. Some slimes are pretty sticky and come back to my shelter just covered in weird little odds and ends from the ruins. It seems intentional, but maybe they also just want me to help get the junk off of them.
racing - They're not the fastest or most coordinated creatures out there, but I see them sometimes race with each other! I've even seen tracks worn in the grass or dust that indicate it's something they do regularly.
just kind of hanging out - They seem pretty social with each other for the most part. After a while I've been able to pick out that they have different friends, acquaintances, and even rivalries.
slime reproduction
They're so secretive about this that it's hard to tell, but once I walked in on a red slime and a blue slime with a smaller purple blob between them and they both seemed pretty bashful about it.
I suspect they take a little bit from each parent and kind of squish them together and eventually a new slime is created by that process, um, somehow. I'm just gonna call it "squishing."
bye!
That's all from me for now, sorry. I've got a site to write and a shelter full of fresh babies that need employee orientation.
If you find this journal next to a skeleton, hi, I bet the slimes lead you here. Take care of them for me, OK?
- Gen
