#vincent hacker

Ever since that fateful day, I haven’t spoken a word to Vinnie.

It’s not like we were best friends, chatting everyday- at least not best friends in LA. But having sex whilst he had a girlfriend proved too much for me.

I ignored every text, every call, every attempt to get in contact despite what I really wanted. However I knew that any form of interaction between us would end up the same way our last one ended.

And I was very right.

It had been 2 months, it was all going good. I was starting to forget the feeling of his lips on me. Starting to forget the way he made me laugh, held my body close whispering sweet nothings. 

I started spending more time at the gym, and spent more time with my friends. Went out clubbing, shopping, anything that would help me forget. 

But in the back of my mind, only one thing actually made me crumble in the middle of the night, only one thing I thought of when I fell asleep, the one thing I craved.

He had given me an inch and I imagined it to be a mile- the same mistake I kept on making.

So when I heard that Vinnie was throwing his birthday and I had received the coveted invitation- I imagined it to be the world.

Vinnie’s birthday was always something I looked forward to back home. Maria’s cooking, Nate on the grill, and Reggie playing silly board games with Vinnie and I.

***

“YOU FUCKING CHEATER” I yelled, jostling Poncho in my lap.

“Oh c’mon it’s not my fault you suck at Uno” Vinnie laughs moving to pet Poncho.

“Absolutely not! I had Uno, I was about to win!” I grumble, my head falling onto the coffee table table.

Reggie’s hand rubs my back, “Hey we all know Vinnie cheats don’t worry,” He teases sticking his tongue out at his big brother.

The two boys start bickering, laughing, and yelling curses as I cradle Poncho, “Shh baby ignore em their just two stinky men” I whisper

Their words quickly turn into playful rough housing until Maria breaks them up bringing out Vinnie’s cake.

His face is illuminated by the soft glow of the candles, as the cake is set in front of him. His big signature toothy grin covers his entire face as he watches us start to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to him.

One of his hands wraps around my waist and my world just stops- at least for a moment before I’m jostled by him blowing out the candles in one big huff.

“What did you wish for Vin?” Nate asks, smiling at his newly adult son

His face turns to look at me giving me a smile before turning back to his dad, “Can’t say unless I don’t want it to come true.”

My world just died right there before starting all over again.

That was a day before he left for LA.

***

I had spent the night getting ready with my friends. I was adorned in pretty jewelry complimenting my hair. I was wearing a pretty white tie-in-the-front white cropped top with long sleeves and a low-rise white mini skirt. I had matching waist chains with some strappy white heels. 

Vinnie’s favourite perfume of mine sprayed on my skin in an involuntary action as I packed up my little purse with some needed essentials and some non-essentials.

I stared in the mirror, Was I really doing this?

“Babes Tyler is here!” My friend Kylie shoots in my direction.

Tyler- the only reason my friends thought I should go to this party was if I brought a guy, so Tyler had to do.

I guess I am.

My friends and I walk out to Tyler’s car, not before a shot for pure confidence, and slip into the passenger seat driving down the same way I went two months ago.

We arrive at the house around 10:30, right around when most people are trickling in. I fix my dress as we walk through the door and all of a sudden the wave of anxiousness washes over me and I want to run.

I don’t however run away, despite how much I want to, I still hold it together.

Kylie pulls me aside to check up on me and hands me a drink, telling me to ‘get some!’ Despite the fact that we both have very different people in mind. 

Jordan, one of Vinnie’s friends walks up to me engaging in mindless conversation that's so clearly an attempt to find out who Tyler is or if “I’m seeing anyone.”

Despite that fact we have a pleasant conversation whilst I feel a pair of very familiar eyes burning into the back of my skull as I hug Jordan goodbye as people get ready for midnight.

Two blonde dudes come in holding a large sheet cake with 22 candles placed ever so gently on top.

Vinnie’s hand is wrapped around Allison who stares at him as if he’s the sun and the stars and his eyes stay on me, causing me to sweat. He grins as the cake is placed in front of him, straightening out his stupid little suit as everyone begins to sing.

As the song finishes everyone bursts into cheers as he blows out his candle as Allison grips onto him, his eyes leave the cake finding his girlfriend’s as she asks, “What did you wish for baby?”

He smiles, not saying a word as he looks back at me, “It’s a secret.”

That’s too much for me.

I maneuver around the drunk crowd, sprinting up the nearest stairs and into the first room, walking out onto the balcony and sitting down on the ground.

My world feels like it's out of orbit, everything just stopped. My head tips back on the glass balcony as I try to recollect my thoughts.

Stray tears fall onto my face, if he can do it for her, why couldn’t he have done it for me, is the only thought that swirls in my mind.

“Hey are you okay?” No no no.

I shut my eyes praying he’ll just go away, but he doesn’t, he never could. He sits down next to me, his body heat slipping on to me.

His hand rests on my shoulder, “Open your eyes” Vinnie’s voice whispers and like a marionette, I obliged.

My bloodshot teary eyes meet his as I turn my head as I move to wipe away my tears.

“Yes?” My voice breaks.

“Why are you crying?” He whispers, his gaze soft and his words even softer.

“Don’t do this, Vinnie.” I whisper, desperation evident in my voice.

“What pretty girl?”

And I cry all over again. I take in staggered breaths as his arms wrap around me. His hands soothe my skin as I crumble into his dumb suit.

I melt into his touch. I want to die like this, in his arms.

“I can’t do this, I don’t know why I came” I whisper as tears fall on my face and into his shirt.

“It’s my birthday… didn’t you want to be here?” He asks, his voice breaking a little as he pulls my face away, lifting up my chin to look at him.

His gaze drops to my lips for a moment as I snap out of it, immediately rising to my feet stepping into the room.

“No no we can’t do this” I whisper-yell at him, my hands crossed over my chest

“We’re not doing anything?” He looks bewildered, his eyebrows knit together

“We can’t be friends.. I-I can’t be here alone with you, your girlfriends downstairs!” My voice rises a little

His expression is the picturesque definition of pain, “Why not?”

“Because I spent years loving you and you threw it all away!” I yell my hand pointing at him

“I didn’t throw it away!” He raises his voice, stepping closer to me

“Oh yes you fucking did, and I was doing so good! I was forgetting about you!” I cry out, I step closer to him.

“I don’t want you to forget about me” His voice is expressionless, as he steps closer as we’re practically chest to chest

“I want to! You have a girlfriend” I slam my fist on his chest as his grabs my wrist

“Jesus were you always this fucking bossy when we were kids?” His eyes narrow, eyeing me

I roll my eyes and scoff, “Fuck. You.” 

He has the audacity to laugh, “You can try and forget me, get with that idiot you got here with- But never, tell me I threw us away, I loved you! I love you.” 

His voice softens ever so slightly, “I will never not love you, tell me to break up with Allison, I will, tell me to kick everyone out right now, I will. Whatever you want, tell me. I’m yours”

“I hate you. Leave.” I huff

He shakes his head, “Anything but that.” 

“Leave me like you left me 3 years ago and 2 months ago” I whisper

“No.” His voice is harsh and commanding

“Vinnie…”

“No.” His grasp on my hand doesn't falter and in fact his other hand grasps my other wrist.

My eyes narrow, please whatever scraps of self respect I have please kick in.

His pushes me back against the wall, my hands pinned either side of me as he places a kiss on the birthmark on my neck, “I’m never leaving you”

I shut my eyes, tipping my head back, please kick in, I beg.

“Open your eyes.” His voice rough and ragged

My eyes flutter open, meeting his blown out brown eyes.

Oh no.

His lips meet mine in a desperate kiss, his hand moves to grasp my waist as mine tangles in his hair. 

“We can’t” I whisper despite still kissing him back

“Just shut the fuck up” He groans as he bites down on my bottom lip

“You’re my worst addiction” He mumbles moving to kiss my neck

I whine, nails digging into his curly brown locks, “I hate you”

“I know my love” I murmurs against my skin, kissing every spot of my neck he can find before dipping down to my tits.

“Vinnie-”

“Yes.” His voice cuts mine off, his head tipping up, looking up at my eyes.

I shut my eyes, “Need you”

“What? Where? Tell me” He begs

“Need you to fuck me, rough” I whisper

He stops his kisses, moving to cup my face, “Whatever you want doll”.

He meets my lips in a rough kiss guiding me to the edge of the bed, pushing me down to sit.

“God you're so pretty, it makes me wanna ruin you sometimes” He whispers out, his voice rough as he moves a strand of my hair away from my face as he looks down at me.

He moves me further up the bed as he leans over me, pulling the buttons of his waist coat down but as he’s mid way he gets frustrated he just rips it off along with his shirt as he kisses me again.

His lips move in tandem with mine as he pulls the knot of my shirt, causing it to fall down.

“Mine” He whispers into the kiss, “Say it princess”

“Yours” I whine as he shuffles my skirt and panties off and unclasped my bra

“My perfect girl” He mumbles as he flips me over, smushing my face into the pillows

I can hear his belt clinking open and he shuffles out of his constricting dress pants and boxers

“S gonna hurt darling girl, just be good for me” He whispers as he kisses my spine as he slowly stretches me out

His hand pushes my head down into the pillow as his other hand rubs circles on my clit.

My toes curl up and my eyes roll back as he starts to slowly rut into me, “There she fucking is”

His grunts echo in the room as my muffled moans coat the pillow, “Cmon, you can take it won't you? You're just so good for me.”

His words tease me as he speeds up his pace, he pushes down my head to thrust deeper into me as his muscles flex around me.

“So fucking tight, s’ like you were made for me” He grits as he pulls my hair up as a ragged moan leaves my mouth

“Such a whore, so good for me aren’t ya?” He chuckles

I whine nodding my head as my mind is too cloudy to form words.

He slaps my ass illciting another pitchy moan from me, “Asked you a fucking question” 

“Mhm all for you” I mumble biting down on my lip

“God you don’t even know what you fucking do to me darling” He groans as his hand speeds up around my clit

“M close, Vin m close” I ramble like an idiot shutting my eyes

He slaps my ass again causing me to yell, “Beg for it gorgeous girl” 

“Please Vinnie” I crumble whining

He laughs at my sad attempt, “My good girl can do better than that can’t she?” 

“Please please I need it so bad, need you so bad” I mewl under him

His pace speeds up, “Yeah? Take it baby”

I cum with a loud moan as my eyes screw shut. I can feel Vinnie kiss along my spine, caressing the sides of my body.

He flips me over so I’m looking at him, his flexed biceps on either side of my face and his dumb chain dangling over my face.

He sinks in again as I whimper, “Can’t Vin” 

“Yes you can, you're so good, aren’t you?” His voice teases

I succumb to his words mindlessly nodding my head.

“That's right, you can take it and you fucking will.” He punctuates with a sharper thrust

The headboard slams against the wall against Vinnie’s impossible strength rutts into me.

One of my hands wraps around his bicep and the other holds onto his wrist as I pull it on to my neck.

His eyebrows scrunch together in confusion.

“Please?” I whisper

He chuckles as he squeezes around my neck using the grip to pound deeper into me as my eyes roll back as my cunt clenched around him.

“M’ gonna cum, can’t hold out, you just feel too fucking good” He whispers

I whine at that cumming around him without warning as I clench around him he finishes inside me.

We take a second to catch our breaths just lying there for a second.

He pulls out maneuvering us on the bed as he kisses my neck, “Not too much my love?”

“Never” I hum

He nuzzles into my neck as my back meets his chest, “Want me to break up with Allison?”

I take a second to process his question.

“Yes… but I don’t want to date you right now” I whisper

“I'll stay alone forever if it’ll make you happy princess” He hums 

“Good” I giggle

“God should've known you were heartache from the moment I met you” He chuckles as he falls asleep in the crook of my neck.

[bf!vinnie]

— no promises. (crushculture03)

— keep going. (toughguymatt)

— rosy cheeks. (takecareluv)

— new girl. (m9ow)

— a quiet kind of forever. (deansbeer)

— a night after an argument. (wildesqdreams)

— vinnie with a titty fixation. (slvthrs)

“oh, you’re here,” she’d say, like you hadn’t been coming over since sophomore year. like you weren’t the one who drove him to his first tattoo appointment, or sat through every bad haircut phase, or stayed up until sunrise with him after his anxiety got worse.

it wasn’t that you wanted him to choose. you just wanted to stop feeling like an intruder in your own friendship.

so you started answering less. taking longer to text back. the gaps in conversation stretched wider, until vinnie’s name lit up your phone and you felt… dread.

the worst part was that he noticed.

“did i do something?” “you’ve been quiet lately.” “i miss you.”

you’d stare at those messages until your vision blurred, thumbs hovering over the keyboard, typing and deleting the truth over and over.

and then one night, he called again. you didn’t answer.

but he sent you a voice note a minute later, his voice low, rough with something you couldn’t name.

“i don’t know what’s going on, but… if you’re mad at me, just tell me. please. you’re my best friend. i— i can’t lose you too.”

and god, it almost broke you.

you didn’t plan on seeing him. you’d been doing so good at avoiding the places he might be — skipping the usual hangouts, muting the groupchat whenever his girlfriend started talking.

but tonight, you were just grabbing coffee. that was it.

and then you heard his laugh.

it was muscle memory, the way your head turned toward the sound. vinnie, at a corner table. her, sitting across from him.

you froze, ready to turn around, when she looked up and locked eyes with you.

her smile didn’t reach her eyes. “oh,” she said, loudly enough for vinnie to hear. “you’re still around?”

vinnie’s head whipped toward you, face breaking into something bright. “hey! what are you—”

“i was just leaving,” you cut in, trying to make it sound casual, even as your pulse pounded in your ears.

but then she laughed. soft, fake. “babe, maybe let her go. she’s been… what’s the word… clingy lately, hasn’t she?”

you swear the room went quiet.

vinnie blinked, once, twice — like his brain was buffering. “what?”

“it’s fine,” she said, shrugging, like she hadn’t just shoved a knife between your ribs. “we all know she’s had this, like, weird thing for you since high school.”

you couldn’t even look at him. “i should go.”

but his chair scraped against the floor before you could take a step. “no, you’re not going anywhere,” vinnie’s voice was sharp now, cutting through the café noise.

he turned to her, jaw clenched. “you’ve been saying shit like that to her? that’s why you’ve been avoiding me?” he asked you, softer now.

you hated how your throat burned when you nodded.

“unbelievable,” he muttered, standing up fully. “we’re done.”

her face twisted. “seriously? over her?”

“over you being a shitty person,” he shot back, grabbing his hoodie off the chair.

and then he was next to you, hand on your shoulder, steering you toward the door like you were the only person in the world who mattered.

outside, you couldn’t even meet his eyes, but he stopped you on the sidewalk anyway.

“you should’ve told me,” he said, voice quieter now, almost breaking. “i didn’t want to make you choose,” you whispered.

“you’re my best friend,” he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “there’s no choice.”

you don’t even remember how you ended up in his car. one second you were outside the café, heart pounding from the adrenaline, and the next you were in the passenger seat, streetlights sliding across your lap.

vinnie didn’t say much at first. just drove. the windows were cracked, the cool air tangling your hair, and you realized his playlist hadn’t changed since high school — same old songs you used to scream-sing with your feet on the dashboard.

he pulled into the drive-thru without asking, ordered your drink before you could even open your mouth. you hated how your chest ached at that.

you sat in silence for a bit, straw between your lips, watching the condensation bead on the plastic cup.

“i keep thinking about all the calls you didn’t answer,” vinnie said finally, eyes on the road. “how many times you probably needed me, and you didn’t feel like you could.”

you swallowed. “it wasn’t about—”

“no, i get it now.” his fingers tapped the steering wheel, restless. “i just… it kills me that you were dealing with her alone. i should’ve noticed.”

“she made it really easy for you not to,” you muttered, then immediately regretted it.

but vinnie just let out this frustrated sigh. “yeah. and i let her.”

you turned your head, studying his profile in the dim glow from the dashboard. the way his jaw tightened, like he was holding back more words than he could say.

“you’re not gonna lose me, y’know,” you said quietly.

that got him to look at you — really look, like he was trying to memorize your face. “promise?”

you nodded, feeling his gaze linger like the sun on bare skin. “promise.”

he smiled then, soft and crooked, before reaching across the console to ruffle your hair like he used to when you were sixteen.

“good,” he said. “because i’m never letting you ghost me again.”

the rest of the night was easy — like muscle memory. you talked about dumb stuff, drove around aimlessly, ended up parked outside your house two hours later with empty cups in the cupholder.

when you got out, he leaned across the seat and called your name.

“i don’t care who i’m dating,” he said, a little too seriously for 2:37 a.m. “you’re it for me, okay? my person.”