#very lucky

Regulus: Your scrunchy?

Barty: My lucky scrunchy, it helped me pass spanish

Evan: You passed because you gave the professor a lap dance after the final

….U GOT REAL LUCKY WITH THAT “t “ BUDDY…

Chance: I made tea. Parker: I don't want tea. Chance: I didn't make you tea. This is my tea. Parker: Then why did you tell me? Chance: It's a conversation starter. Parker: It's a horrible conversation starter. Chance: Oh, is it? We're conversing. Checkmate.

Parker: I know every song to ever exist it doesn't matter if it's from the past, present or the future. Chance: Oh yeah? Then continue this. Chance: I don't cook I don't clean- Parker: So let me tell you how I got this ring. Parker & Chance: ….. Parker & Chance: GOBBLE ME, SWALLOW ME-

Chance, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume? Parker: grabs and chugs the entire bottle Parker: Parker: It's perfume.

Chance: I’m genuinely surprised you haven’t gotten arrested, let alone gotten a felony yet. Parker: Nat 20 Charisma. Chance: That is NOT how that works-

Chance: You use emoji’s like a straight person. Parker: That’s literally the worst thing anyone has ever said about me.

Lucky: Heh, Parker sneezes like a girl. Parker: How about I pound you like boy? Parker: That didn’t come out right.

Parker: What’s your body count? Lucky: Do you mean sex or murder?

Chance: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism. Lucky: And you came to me?

Chance: Parker, no. Parker: Parker, yes.

Lucky: There. How do I look? Parker: Like a cheap French harlot. Lucky: French?!

Lucky: I'm sorry. Please talk to me. Parker: Lucky: Hello? World's most amazing person?? Sweet pea? Precious cinnamon roll that's too good for this world, too pure? Parker: 'Sorry' doesn't bring back my fucking M&Ms.

Chance: look Lucky, I'm not kink-shaming you but… Chance: Actually yeah, I'm TOTALLY kink-shaming you. Chance, with the gun she had: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?? Lucky: It's fake. Parker: It's not. Chance: Lucky: Chance: I'm just going to ignore how they knew.

Parker: Hold the fuck up. Chance: Excuse me? Parker: I said hold the fuck up. Chance: Parker: I’m the fuck up, hold me.

Lucky: This bloodline ends with me. Chance: That's the fanciest way I've ever heard someone say "I'm gay".

Parker: Did you miss me while I was gone? Lucky: You were gone?

Lucky: Bonjour, Parker. Voulez–vous coucher avec moi? Parker: No, I don't want to sleep with you. Lucky: Is that what that means? Oh, man, I had a really gross tennis instructor.

Lucky: Life could be worse, Chance. Chance: Life could be a lot better too!

Chance: Lucky… Lucky: I can tell by the tone of your voice that you are disappointed. Alas, I must further disappoint you by affirming how little I give a fuck.

Chance: I’m doing what I can to jog your memory. Lucky: It’s jogging, I guess. Its tiddies are jiggling a little. Chance: Nice.

Parker: What have I done wrong?! Chance: Everything. For your entire life.

Parker: People tell me I have a unique way of lighting up a room. Chance: It’s called arson and those people are called witnesses.

Parker: Fellas, I gotta know for science. Is the opposite of red green or blue? Chance: Technically a mix of green and blue? Parker: So blurple. Chance: That's implying you're mixing blue and purple. Parker: Would you rather have fucking bleen? MOTHERFUCKING GRUE? Chance: You were confusing before but now I'm scared.

Chance, turning to Parker: Stop calling yourself hot, the only thing you can turn on is the microwave.

Parker: Chance? I mixed redbull with coffee and now I can see sounds, should I worry? Chance: Parker, I swear to god—

Parker, playing a video game: This game is so frustrating! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! Lucky: Ok, I think it’s time to turn off the game for a little while. Parker: But I’m having fun!

Parker: If it’s any consolation, they got me here on a very misleading text message. Lucky: Technically, you are about to be screwed in the biology room.

Parker: They don’t make them like me no more. I’m the last of my kind. Chance+Lucky: Thank god.

Lucky: I’m doing my best. Chance: You’re not doing anything. Lucky: Yes, that’s what I’m best at.

Chance: I’m serious! They’re watching me! They’ve even got an agent following me! Don’t you believe me? Lucky: Look, it’s not that I don’t believe you… It’s that I don’t believe you and I don’t care.

Lucky: We're gonna play bingo, boys/gals/enbys! Chance: Bingo? Isn't that a game for the elderly? Lucky: Not the way I do it. Lucky: checks her phone Parker: Oh fuck. She's on Twitter.

Chance, talking about Lucky: WHAT THE FUCK I WAS ARGUING WITH THEM AND I SAID “OOH YOU WANNA KISS ME SO BAD” AND GUESS WHAT? THEY DID. THEY KISSED ME. WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO I DO.