#vandermarston

Why did I only JUST learn that “Everyone thinks you’re Dutch’s pet” IS ACTUALLY CANON???? And up until this point I thought it was just a fucking fan trope because of course John is Dutch’s favorite dog; the way Bill literally says this to him in camp got me ashdkfklskalajsksb

vandermarston petplay but its dutch sticking his fingers in johns mouth and feeling all his teeth and gums and tongue while john drools and whines. just to make sure his attack dog is in working order ^_^

Thinking … abt the ludic element of Dutch denying John his kill. RDR gives you every other chance to enact violence that you want. Even if it is a fail state you can still pull the trigger. With Dutch it enters a cutscene. The player as John completely loses their agency when it comes to Dutch in a way that they don’t with Javier and Bill. He’s controlling the ludic aspect of the narrative in an almost fourth-wall breaking sort of way. The structure and form of the game itself, a sandbox, will not allow you to step outside and exert agency over Dutch. He is the one line that cannot be crossed. It’s a sort of tease almost. The best thing I can compare it to is a ruined orgasm. You have come for me at the edge of this world, climbed the highest peak and I will deny you your release. Like specifically because it’s a gameplay element it takes on this more embodied quality. It’s not just a narrative element of disappointment in a film or novel, the fact that you can pull the trigger on your controller and nothing will happen to Dutch makes John almost … impotent . He has what he wants but not in the way he wanted it, the orgasm without the pleasure. And then there’s the feeling of watching Dutch fall down the cliff side, his body inelegant and almost comical. Like I laughed watching him die, because of how awkward his body looked. He denies John a beautiful death, too, the consolation of Baudelaire in his memento mori in Fleurs du Mal. Death is an ugly broken man who won’t let you kill him, not the beautiful red-necked woman of a murder ballad. This lack of control also contrasts with John’s death, where the control you’re given is completely laughable. It allows you to shoot but it feels like mockery, with John also left mangled. You cannot choose to die beautifully, either.