#vampire apo

Summary: The truffle alliance-Apokuna, Abolish, Pyro, and Legs-come back from their journey with a new friend, the extraordinary pig, Truffle! Currently they're trying to make Truffle a home and spoil them rotten!! They might love this pig too much...

Takes place during episode one, before Pyro turns.

[Update: Should be in parts now]

Pyro: I thought why not invite the dumbest but most devilish person I know to make it a bit more fun…

*Apokuna*

~~~~~

Apo: Pyro, I have a lil confession I need to make

Pyro: Ok let’s hear it

Apo: I might’ve killed truffle

Pyro: What? You might’ve, so there’s possibility that wasn’t Truffle

Apo: No, that was Truffle.

Apo: Satan was like, now you got to go to hell because you killed a pig, and you can chose 1 person to go to hell with you and well I thought it’ll be funny *[Pyro: yay!]* to work on our marital issues 

Pyro: I don’t know where the marital issues came from

~~~~~

Apo: Wow, that’s a dead dude

Pyro: Are they going to be okay

Apo: They’ll be fine, *probably

Pyro: eww, it’s all gushy

apo: This is the blood of our enemies

Pyro: all my blood’s in there?

apo: You’re not my enemy 

Apo: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

Both: HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! (Apo’s is a bit delayed)

~~~~~

Apo: oh my god it’s like the maze all over again

~~~~~

Pyro: I found a heartbreak shard, that’s sad

Them punching eachother beneath the floorboards

Pyro: we don’t need divorce court, we have *wheeze* this adventure map

Apo: You can have the brush,and you can have the key. Also take this bone

Pyro: Oh thanks

Apo: Just incase you find a dog so we can have a new pet together 

Pyro: …Just to replace the old one

Pyro: maybe I should be in charge of the pet next time

Apo: Uh, I don’t know man

Apo: a lil guy with horns

Apo: I could be down for a flesh room, depends on the kind of day

Apo: Not the flesh hole, just the regular hole

Pyro:…Cereal and Captain Crunch and we need to find 2 other people to help us eat it

Apo: Pyro Imma get some cereal

…

Apo: Pyro, we’re out of cereal

Pyro: oh, WHAT!

***they could’ve been called AppleJack Cereal duo/Cereal Duo

Apo: well you got to, Pyro, or else we’re stuck in here forever, Pyro, and then we can’t get back to the Vampires SMP ep7 recording. 

Pyro: Noo

~~~~~

Apo: oh my god Pyro *punches him*

Pyro: Maybe we ask this dude for directions 

Apo: Hey dude, what’s up

Pyro: How’s it hanging 

Apo punches it and the dude dies

*Distress noises*

Your very brave, by the way, for walking onto this glass

Apo: I know what a fog build looks like. I build, man.

Apo: oh it’s like a maze, I know this 

Pyro: Luckily I have you illuminated like a glowstick 

Apo: Yeah, I’m pretty blue 

Apo: I love shattering cursed flesh

Pyro: I like instructions 

Paraphrased

Apo: What if I stand in the ritual? *Nothing happens.

Pyro: You give off those vibe, like you know, the dog getting vaccines and the 5g

Apo: What?

Pyro: We just found the sh-BATHROOM

Apo: Welp *jumps to the hole* 

Pyro: Oh flesh

Apo: It’s not the good flesh, we’ll find the- I mean, I have the flesh, it’s right here

Is it reusable 

Apo: Don’t know but I plan on eating it

~~~

Pyro: Get him, take his lunch money

Apo: Im the next one in line

Apo: The flesh tube

~~~

Apo: Ok so it gambling 

Pyro: Let’s go gambling (gambling core anyone?)

Pyro: well what’s the point of anything 

Apo: don’t get so philosophical on me

Pyro: WE’RE IN HELL

Apo: ok and there’s a point to hell

Apo: it wasn’t cursed, Pyroscythe

~~~

Both: *Car noises*

~~~

Pyro: Our flame[Hope] has a name

Apo: oh, I see. I don’t need Hope to survive, I just need myself.

~~~~~

Pyro: oh that was the toilet of despair 

~~~~~

Pyro: Ok suck in

Apo: suck in, but what about my gut

Pyro: The walls don’t care

Apo: The walls don’t care about your gut

Pyro: You pushed me into the cobwebs 

Apo: I didn’t push you, you pushed yourself into the cobwebs. Weak. Weak mindset. 

~~~~~

Screaming in the background*

Pyro: Did you just scream

Apo: No *is making the noises from the shrieker 

Apo: Pyroscythe, why did you sent us to hell

Pyro: I’m sorry

Apo: no pushback what so ever?

Pyro: look, I’m just a guy who likes to travel. And I hear it was a cheap way to travel to get somewhere with interesting sights and the foreign delicacies 

Pyro: you remember it?

Apo: ok here we go

Pyro: WHAT YOUR CRAZY 

Apo: it was just 5 sounds

Pyro: I can’t remember all that 

Apo: *laughs* 

~~~~~

Apo: I love warm air

Pyro: Lovely breeze

~~~~~

Apo: dude, this whole map have been full of flesh- there’s more downstairs. Oh god.

Apo: You think it’s the only way we can go , but this whole map is, we find new ways to go

Pyro: hey, your not going to believe this

 *opens door*

Apo: Another door

Pyro: the flesh isn’t removable 

Apo: but it flesh?

Pyro: idk, this looks more like a wagyu steak

Apo: Wagyu. They don’t have wagyu steak in hell. Pyro!

Apo: My mouse is broken, btw, so this is really hard to control [laughter] I try to break the flesh and it’s not breaking 

Pyro: need a bit of help

Apo: yeah I’ll like some help

Them just being bullies to the flesh skeletons

Pyro: Nothing burger

Apo: Pyroscythe [w/ an accent]

Apo: Crimson key(x2) just like Vampires SMP

Pyro: Slap it in

Apo: Drops in the water

Apo: I slapped myself with some water

~~~~~

Apo: Alrighty Pyro do you trust me *steps off the block*

Pyro still falls anyways even if he had the block

Pyro: Go ahead

*Apo Jumps to the first platform

Pyro: Yeah go on

Apo: You can get it out your system 

Pyro: Nonononononono go ahead.

Apo jumps and Pyro moves making Apo fall

*[Laughter]*

Pyro: Where, oh you’re in the drink

Apo: Don’t call it that

~them meeting Linda for the first time~

Pyro: The door behind us just closed 

Apo: That’s fine, weren’t planning going back into hell

Apo: give it a sec. It’s cooking 

Apo: *Chanting Drink*

Pyro: *Chanting Chug*

Apo: What a freak *refering to Linda

Apo: Pyroscythe!

Pyro: This is the last time we’re going to do this so say bye-bye

Apo: yeah, third time, bye-bye

Apo: Oh it’s fire

Pyro: yeah the fire’s kind of(x2) crispy

Apo: What an astute observation 

Pyro: Lightly grilled Apo

Apo: Lightly grilled Apo!? I don’t want to be lightly grilled

Pyro: We have to remember our training 

Apo: our training, our training 

—-

Both: L bozo [Apo: step on his blood]

~~~~

Them just terribly hiding the fact the only one can leave

Pyro: Oh Thats reassuring, they say that the ascend is only for the willing

Both: Im willing

~~~On the elevator~~~

Pyro: Oh, would you look at that, we didn’t have to do something terrible 

Apo: I think they were just messing with us, to prove our loyalty

Pyro: I’m done with loyalty test. I can’t do anything more with those.

Apo: You don’t like loyalty test Pyro?

Pyro: Nah…

Pyro: Your kinda in the floor for me, but as long as you’re climbing up that’s fine 

***I don’t wanna write their decision making as to make it remain sort of lighthearted however I find the next section funny

~~~One ascends and One sacrifice Ending~~~

Apo: And your life is greed

Pyro: Well I have a life

Apo: Ur evil!

Pyro: Well what do you have, what do you have, Apo?

Apo: Im just watching you.

~The end title shows~

Pyro: Veinbound!

Apo: Don’t talk to me for the rest of the day. Don’t you dare talk to me for the rest of the day, Pyroscythe.

Pyro: My bad

Apo: You got to be kidding me. You evil, evil man

Pyro: I-

Apo: *Evil!*

Pyro: I needed to leave (x3)

Apo: Im killing you in Vampires SMP. I’m glad I killed Truffle.

Pyro: I really like this adventure map. I think we learned a lot about each other and ourselves. 

Apo: I learned I should never ever trust you

Pyro: I think that’s a good lesson 

Apo: What the heck!?

Vampire SMP AU but Apo is just a gothic magical girl whose tasked with defeating the vampires, but because she's goth people think she's also a vampire, say what?