#urbain

The girl groans again as she slumps her body against Urbain’s side. He can see her eyes skirting over his open notebook, the one where he’s handwritten an essay draft instead of doing it on a laptop, but she doesn’t seem all that interested in taking anything in from the words in front of her; despite Harmony’s lack of commitment when it comes to schoolwork, she’s honest enough to not steal Urbain’s hard work. She’ll ask him for help, more often than not having him do half the work for her, but she does at least somewhat do the work. And anyway, he’s more than happy to offer his help; he knows that, were he to say no to her, she would accept defeat. She’d whine, but she wouldn’t snoop around his work, trying to take what isn’t hers. She’d just call it quits; thankfully, Urbain has never said no to her, always providing Harmony with a detailed summary of what needs to be analyzed or studied, as well as a few pointers and starter ideas to help her complete her assignments.

“Yeah, ‘kay, but,” Harmony’s head collides with Urbain’s lap as he flips the page of the novel he’s working with, “who in their right minds would want to pay money to go back to school? Like, you could literally go to any party and have a way better time than going to get babysat by some ass teachers!”

“Some people aren’t invited to parties, Harms.”

“Only ‘cause they’re losers.”

Urbain finally sets everything down for real before turning his attention to the girl laying on his floor. Pale gray eyes are staring up at him, challenging him. He knows that she’s waiting for him to push back, to argue with her, to tell her that, maybe, he’d actually like to go to said school event since he’s not as popular as her. She wants to pull a reaction out of him, but Urbain isn’t going to give it to her. He doesn’t bother trying to convince her that she’s wrong; he just pokes her cheek before picking up his book once more. The sooner he finishes this essay, the sooner the summer will be here.

“How about,” he pokes her cheek again as Harmony swats at him, “you brainstorm about your essay instead of worrying about what other people do with their time and money?”

“No way!” Harmony practically jumps up from the hardwood floor, now sitting up straight right next to Urbain. “That’s even stupider!”

She says “stupider” like the very thought of putting in the work it takes to not fail will kill her; then again, perhaps it actually will. Harmony is effortlessly social, effortlessly pretty, effortlessly amazing, but she is most definitely not effortlessly academically inclined. Anything that might score her a grade is just one big inconvenience to the easy flow of her life; Urbain sometimes wonder what she would do if he weren’t there to bug her about getting her work done on time. She would probably be spending night after night partying and failing her classes instead of being sprawled on a bedroom floor right next to Urbain. Or perhaps she’d constantly be grounded. Regardless, that hypothetical is far from important; here, now, next to Urbain, Harmony eventually gets around to finishing her schoolwork.

“You,” Harmony recoils as Urbain flicks her nose and grins, “need to pass your classes.”

“I,” she shoves his shoulder in retaliation, drawing his full attention to her, “can do whatever I want.”

“Even pass you classes?”

Harmony scoffs, now pushing Urbain away, the tips of her fingers hard against his cheekbone. She’s playing it cool, acting like she’s too good for anything Urbain suggests, but they both know he’s right. They both know that she will, sooner or later, need to study and finish her work. They’ll both get around to finishing up this school year; for the time being, though, they might as well take a break and have little bit of distracting fun.

A yelp breaks out of the girl as Urbain pokes her side. She squirms as he repeats over and over again that she needs to get back to work. She’s shoving and kicking like a child, trying her absolute best to get away from Urbain, but it’s not working; thankfully, she’s holding back every so slightly and therefore not harming anyone. They’re both acting like children; the only things missing is the smell of freshly mowed grass and scraps on their knees. They’re rolling around just as they did when they were 10, collapsing pillow forts and trying to overpower one another. They’re still acting like ridiculous children, and no one can stop them.

Harmony’s giggles echo through the room as tries dodging Urbain’s attacks, ordering him to cut it out but showing no sign of being serious. Urbain has gotten good at knowing when he’s gone too far; he knows when Harmony is being dead serious, and now is not one of those times. So he keeps at it, pestering her until she’s physically grabbing his wrists. And even once caught, he also does not give in. It’s a struggle, trying to break free and get an upper hand in this fight; Harmony is, unfortunately, ridiculously strong for a girl her size.

“You,” her fingers tighten around Urbain’s wrists, her nails digging into his skin, “will not convince me to do an ass project literally no one cares about!”

“And you,” he’s still struggling to break free from her iron grip, still pushing and pulling away, “will have to eventually do it!”

With one swift movement, Urbain is yanking his arm back. Harmony has to let go; she’s far more stubborn than he expected her to be. And frankly, that’s entirely on him; Urbain should have known better than to underestimate Harmony’s commitment and strength. He should have known that he could not win; he never would have anticipated them both to go tumbling back onto the hardwood floor, Harmony now pinning his wrist to the ground.

There’s a beat of silence. They’re both too stunned to speak; neither one dares makes a move. Pale gray eyes stare at Urbain; his heart flips in his chest. They’re friends. They’ve always been friends. They’re just friends.

They’ve played rough time and time again over the years; Urbain knows that Harmony is stronger than him, as embarrassing as it is to admit out loud. They’ve rolled in sand parks and tumbled down grassy hills together. They’ve climbed trees together and built countless forts with one another. They’ve always done absolutely everything together. They’ve lived their entire lives together because where one finds a Harmony, there will be an Urbain right around the corner. One cannot be found without the other. And nothing will ever change that. Nothing can change that. Nothing can change. Nothing.

 Freckles like stars fill Urbain’s view. His hand twitches at his side. He shouldn’t touch, he knows he absolutely should not, but how he yearns to trace those constellations adorning Harmony’s face. He wants to figure out the patterns that decorate her skin; he wants to be the only one to know them. He wants to be the only one to uncover her secrets, be the one who knows her best in the world. Is that selfish of him? Urbain doesn’t want to be selfish. That’s the very last thing he wants to do, but he can’t help wanting to do this one thing. He can’t help but follow the path of stars before him. Would Harmony mind if he touches her face? Ran his thumb over her skin? Drew the figures he was seeing? Probably. She would probably hate it if he were to reach out to her right now. She—

He’s a terrible friend. Urbain is most probably the worst friend in the whole wide world. He can’t possibly have done anything worse in his life; blue eyes flicker down to her mouth, to her lips that are still slightly parted, like she had expected to make a sound but nothing came out. His eyes flicker down, catching on the shine of her lip gloss, the one he knows smells and tastes like pomegranate from the number of times he’s been sent to fetch it from her bag for her. He’s all to familiar with the tube, how its contents shimmer from whatever sparkles the makeup manufacturer puts in there and how it’s making Harmony’s lips glisten now. Urbain is way too familiar with the shine; he is possibly the worst friend in the world, completely transfixed, absolutely unable to look away, even for a moment.

“Close your eyes.”

Urbain squeezes his eyes shut; following orders is one thing he is exceptionally good at. And this way, he’ll stop staring at Harmony’s perfectly glistening lips and, by extension, stop being such a terrible friend. Because friends don’t let their minds wander into wastelands of wants and desires. Friends don’t stare at each other, wondering things that had previously never crossed anybody’s mind. Best friends don’t create new constellations against each other’s skin or dare think about what a first kiss could feel like. Best friends don’t do any of that; Urbain needs to make up for his mistakes.

Maybe he can apologize by getting her a slice of cake from the new bakery that recently opened. Maybe he can accompany her the next time she goes to the mall, get her another tub of her favorite gloss. Maybe he can help her with her homework, get it done faster for her so she doesn’t have to worry about it. Maybe then, she won’t hate him. If he does all of that, then maybe there won’t be any venom in her voice; there is no venom in her whispers. Maybe she won’t be as cold towards him; Harmony has never been warmer. Or maybe, just maybe, Urbain doesn’t need to do any of those things. Maybe, just this once, he should just turn his brain off.

Maybe, he should relax his hand, stop digging his nails into his palm. Maybe he should take a deep breath and calm the pounding against his ribs. Maybe he should stop wondering if his cheeks are going to burst into flames from how hot his face feels. Maybe he should stop praying for the ground to swallow him whole. Or maybe, just maybe, he should concentrate on the kiss being place on his lips.

It’s clumsy. It’s awkward. Neither one knows exactly what they’re doing; Urbain’s never kissed anyone before, and from what Harmony’s told him, she never particularly cared for the people she’s kissed. She’s never made a big deal about the few kisses she’s handed out; this is, in fact, a very big deal to Urbain. He has no idea what he’s doing, but he does know that his fingers have somehow found the cuff of Harmony’s sleeve and that he’s gripping onto her for dear life. He’s not sure where he can touch her, but he knows that he has to hold on before he floats away. He needs this ore than he needs the air he breathes.

Urbain is gasping as Harmony pulls away. His eyes are wider than they’ve ever been; does he look bewildered? Like a complete maniac? Does he look insane? Hopefully not. Hopefully, he looks somewhat normal; if he didn’t, would she still be reaching out to him as he scrambles to push himself off the ground, desperate to close the little distance that has grown between them? She wouldn’t be touching his face so gently, would she? And she most definitely wouldn’t be letting him crash their mouths together once more, still so desperate to not put an end to this. Because this cannot end quite yet; if this is going to happen only once, then Urbain has to get the most out of it. If this is a one-time deal, then he needs to get it all out of his system.

His breath catches as Harmony’s tongue touches the seam of his parting lips. It’s completely instinctual, letting her in. He will always let her in, let her venture wherever she pleases. What Harmony wants, Urbain is more than willing to give; as long as he gets to be by her side, then he’s ready to jump into the deep end for her. For Harmony, he’s ready for anything. Because if it’s Harmony, he’s ready to chase her to across the world; he’ll chase her in this very room, chase her as she pulls away.

“Was that o—”

Urbain can barely breathe as he presses kiss after kiss to Harmony’s curved lips. She’s smiling; so this is what her smile feels like. This is what Harmony feels like; her weight is pressed down into his thighs, her arms tight around his neck. This is what Harmony tastes like; she’s tilted her head ever so slightly, just enough to make sure they fit perfectly. Because they really do fit perfectly together.

How had Urbain never realized how perfect Harmony is until now? Or maybe he’s known all this time but had refused to admit it to himself or act upon it. Because if he were to acknowledge that Harmony is truly everything to him, then what would have stopped him from having his hands on her waist, pulling her closer and tasting her giggles on his lips? What would have stopped him from spilling all his secrets into the little distance between the two? It really isn’t that he’s suddenly seeing Harmony in a new light; he’s just been terrified of what this light will shine on. After this, what are they? Can they still be friends if they’ve kissed?

“Wait—” He doesn’t want to pull away, but he has to. Urbain needs answers before he can keep doing this. “Harms—” Or maybe he should just shut up and enjoy what he has before he ruins things. “I thought you—” It wouldn’t be right to take something as precious as Harmony’s kisses if he isn’t certain of the outcome. “Harms, what about the guy—”

“You!” Gray eyes sparkle despite the narrowing of her gaze. “You’re an absolute fucking idiot that can’t take the hint that I’ve been flirting with you for weeks!” She jabs her finger against his chest; hopefully, it won’t bruise. “There’s literally no one else! It’s just you, Urbain!”

Urbain blinks at the girl. This whole time, it’s been him. This whole time, he has been desperately trying to convince himself that he is insane for having a crush on his best friend, just to have her tell him point blank that she likes him too. Because that’s what this means, right? She also likes him, right? He’s not misunderstanding things or making things up, right?

“I like you, you stupid dumbass! And I’m sick of waiting for you to—”

Urbain has long accepted that he is a complete fool, especially when it comes to Harmony. He’s stupid and he’s pressing his face to hers because he can. He can finally kiss her. He can press every one his kisses to her lips. He can pour the years of adoration, the years of love, the affection that has grown from respect for a little girl who lent him a pencil to admiration for a girl who never backs down from a challenge. He can pour out all of this love that he’s been bottling up and that has been threatening to explode for weeks now. Finally, finally, he can smile into a kiss he’s been dreaming of for way too long.

How many kisses have they shared now? Too many; not enough. More than Urbain cares to count. Truly, it doesn’t even matter. It also doesn’t matter that they’re sprawled on the floor, a tangled mess clinging to one another. All that matters is that Harmony is there, returning every kiss with just as much fervor. All that matters is Harmony.  

“I like you so much, Harms. I like you so, so much. Like—”

“A stupid amount of much?”

Urbain scrunches his nose as Harmony giggles. “I was not going to say that.” He absolutely was going to say that. “I was gonna say that I… just really, really like you, but also that I don’t want to lose what we have. You’re still my best friend, and—” Something courses through Urbain at the sight of Harmony’s smile slowly turning to a frown. “No! I don’t—Harms, please, I—How do I—I just—”

“If you don’t want to change anything, we don’t…”

“No! No, it’s just… You’re my best friend, but I… Harmony, I don’t… I like you too much to just be your best friend.”

“Then you’ll be my best friend and my boyfriend.”

A fire starts in Urbain’s face. Words fail him as Harmony stares at him, completely unfazed. She’s looking at him as if what she just said was the most normal thing in the world and not a completely life-altering statement. She, unlike Urbain, doesn’t seem to shocked by this sudden development. But then again, what did he expect from Harmony? Harmony who is always way too cool, Harmony who is never bothered by anything, Harmony who does whatever she wants? And if this is what she wants, then Urbain is the last person to object. He is the last person to deny her this as he pushes a strand of hair out of her face and steals one last kiss.