#updating

I'm so stressed today. Before we get started on the stress, I would like to share the good news first! Yesterday, I got surprised by two packages from Amazon. I couldn't believe it! Someone had sent the guinea pigs and myself supplies. The guinea pigs now have two months supplies of timonthy hay, which is very huge for us. The guinea pigs love and live off this hay. As for me, they sent me deodorant. I know it may not seem like much, but that is money I don't have to take from my brother.

Now before you all start wondering, I'm actively looking for jobs. Though I must be honest, a lot of people get scared off by the courts. Thanks to my abuser, I'm facing charges that are just ridiculous. Okay, I'm derailing myself there. Anyway, between my own court date and my abusers court dates, it seems like everyone is just getting scared off. I've already interviewed for three jobs, all denied me. I've entered 25 applications, and got denied by several before interviews were even set up. So, yeah this isn't looking well.

To make it worse the one source of income I was supposed to have, unemployment, is now begin fought for. Thanks to my former employee, they don't believe I deserve unemployment. So now, I have to write a hand written letter to get that back. And even then I might not be able to get my unemployment. I'm really stressed about all of this.

Not just because my pets rely on my income, but because I can't pay any of my bills. NOT A SINGLE BILL. My phone is due tomorrow, and I can't do anything about but ask my brother for help. I hate relying on him for everything. I wish some income would just start coming in. Someone please hire me. Someone please just help me.

I did the most stupid thing I could today and opened my bank account. With all of the bills trying to come out, from my car payment to my phone payment, it is now sitting at -640 plus dollars. I'm so angry, because I'm doing everything in my power to get back on track.

I'm applying to jobs. I'm going to interviews. I even reached out to two influencers. Yes, only two? Figured I would start with the two best influencers that are known for their kindness. Honestly it hurts a little when people are just leaving me on read. On one hand I understand where they are coming from. They are probably worried I'm a scammer. Though I'm not. They might not want their channels involved in this.

Yet at the same time, I feel even more stuck. It's like everywhere I turn, some help does come but not enough. I'm extremely thankful for those who have helped. I can not thank these people enough. I've been thanking them non-stop. And honestly I can't keep expecting the same people to keep donating over and over again.

I have taken the advice to reach out to campaign managers, though that itself is a problem. I have NO MONEY. Managers want money, even if it is a mere 10 or 15 dollars. I honestly wish I could just pay someone to run this fundraiser for me, but honestly I can't. I don't have the money. Plus the moment I get money, it has to go into the most important things. My bills, my pets. So managers are the bottom of that list.

If you haven't figured it out, I'm here to basically rant. I'm stressed, and freaking out. Anyway, if you want to enjoy the happiness I got to experience yesterday, I posted a video to TikTok under https://www.tiktok.com/@lillian.ann.white?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc

I hope that this little rant didn't scare anyone off, I'm just trying to process another stressful day in another stressful time. Anyway, thank you everyone for just begin here and helping in the best ways you are able to! Goodbye for now my social bees and butterflies!

And just be keep things going, I've also linked my Amazon and GoFundMe below!

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/3DUZZKNKUVN4B?ref_=wl_share

Well, life is getting interesting once again. Not all bad news this time around. I've had several more donations, once again Erin has donated, along with Jimmie. I also give thanks to all of the people who have been sending me ideas and links to people and platforms that would help gain further attention in this fundraiser. Since my situation has left me completely tapped of finances, I am not able to follow up on the campaign project managers, but will look further into them once money begins to reappear.

I've also been going out into the job market again. Though sadly, I'm not having much luck with it. Which is a bit odd considering that a lot of places say they are looking actively for employees. Yet somehow I do not fit their requirements. Anyway, I'm off to do another round of applications, this time focusing on night shift, since the day shifts seems to be failing.

Though I did not come here with all bad news. I have reached out to two of my favorite influencers that I follow due to how kind of a person they are. I left them messages, and I honestly hope they will consider offering... well, anything. I'm taking chances by doing so, but as many have suggested, it is necessary and risk that should be taken.

I'm also happy to include the process of cleaning out my guinea pig's new cages. I've also opened up an Amazon Wishlist filled with things that myself and my pets need. We're asking for any and all help! Even you sharing the GoFundMe or Amazon Wishlist will help! Now enjoy the new round of guinea pig cleaning, and some adorable random photos of my two kitty cats, Hathor and Khonsu.

CLEANING OF THE NEW GUINEA PIG CAGE:

These are the photos after I changed the bedding, cleaned out the bottom, wiped down the dishes, and refilled everything. Thanks to the cages before the boys were able to enjoy their grey hideouts this time around. Though we didn't have enough hay bags to switch them around, and I wish I had gotten more when I had the chance. I always make sure that the treat foraging bowls, feeding foraging bowls, and hay bags are filled before putting them back in. Though I took the treat bowls back out because I wanted to fill them with treats for the guinea pigs.

THE PREP OF THE TREAT BOWLS:

I enjoy giving all of my rodents fresh fruits and veggies. Guinea pigs and hamsters can have some of the same fruits and veggies, but the boys get a majority of the mix. The mix includes broccoli, strawberries, carrots, grapes, and cucumbers.

CUTE PHOTOS!!!

Here are a collection of cute photos, including Hathor asleep on the couch with her toe beans exposed. There is also photos of the cats exploring the guinea pigs while they are running around in their play pen. I put up the pen to keep them safe while I clean their cage. I really love the photo of Khonsu sniffing the guinea pigs, he usually a big scaredy cat.

Amazon Wishlist: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/3DUZZKNKUVN4B?ref_=wl_share

GoFundMe:

well, life just got worse. So much worse. The one income I thought I would have was just cut off. How is everything in my life right now a fight? I don't want to fight anymore. I'm tired. I want to be happy again. I want to be stable and comfortable. When I need the income the most, it just disappears. I'm honestly crying right now. I have never been so desperate before. I'm going to sound like a beggar, but I can't anything else, because I truly need help. How will it be before my car gets taken away or when will my phone get cut off? I truly hate my life right now. I truly do. How is there such little support when I need it the most?