#updating

I'm going to update this post later to make the new pinpost. Right now all I can say before getting back to work is their names and titles:

Lya the Blossom

Lyah the Emancipated

Kariya the Alter Ego

Eburnean the Seeker

He was kind, and tall and handsome as they are, brown eyes that move with every brush of your hair, he was always one to be focused on what people were saying, that meant something to you. You did not feel threatened or intimidated by his presence, actually, it was nice that he was there, you weren’t completely alone and he was a nice chat, he knew so much about so many things, it was like he spent his entire life absorbing different information, not even just small bits, he knew the infrastructure of all of the topics you both covered. The floor was still sticky and you were still getting that hooded-eye feeling that happens when you get too drunk, ready to crawl into your bed and sleep it off. A pang in your stomach from the thought of having to depart from your friend of a friend. “Weird” you thought. 

You fumbled with your phone for a second too long because the tall, handsome, brown eyed man stepped closer to you, his bare arm peppered with freckles barely touching yours, pulled out his phone “here, I can call us an Uber if you are comfortable with that, I can add a stop to yours and then I can head to mine, of course if you are alright with that.” He continues “Or I could text Ben and see if he is free to take you home” you could tell, even in your almost stupor, that his intentions were to make you feel comfortable, not crowded, and not forced. He had observed that you felt safe around your best friend Ben.  You obliged in your head before speaking, maybe it was the way he spoke with hesitated confidence, and air of certainty, or the way his hands clasped a glass, his silver bracelet dangling slightly, or it could have even been the way his hair slightly fell when he was nodding and leaning in when a point of conversation got really good. “Thank you, Joe” was all that came out though. 

The uber ride was slightly suffocating, you were still coming down from the giggle-phase of drinking and the Uber smelled exactly like a red rubber shoe your Polly Pocket had when you were young, you could not stop giggling to yourself and trying to explain it to Joe made you entirely hysterical.

“Ohno” you thought “we are only eight minutes from my home” another pang in your stomach left you feeling strange once more, you did not want the night to end. Alas as all good things do, it did. Joe was very sweet in bringing you inside the double doors leading up to your apartment, well, it was sort of a blur really, “please don’t make me go inside” you murmured, he heard, “I don’t think I am quite ready for the night to end” you said a little louder, almost pouting. The boots you were wearing dug into your heels and you could barely keep your eyes open. “I think we should actually find waffles to eat instead” but Joe ushered you inside still, making sure you got in safely before fleeing into the sedan and not really saying much. Getting inside was the easy part, forcing yourself to drink water and take a tylenol was where will power kicked in. Once you were out of your bar clothes you snuggled into bed by yourself in your apartment, alone, you realized. Completely alone, as your roommate had other plans for her Friday night. “Joe didn’t even attempt to come in” you thought, another flutter in your stomach, and then you were out. 

You found yourself searching for him when your friends got together, sometimes he was not there, but mostly he was. Showing up to dinners with a bouquet for the host of their favorite flowers, an appetizer that was specialized for your friends with allergies or food restrictions, hand-made desserts that felt like home. It was becoming too much for you to ignore, you liked Joe, always opting in to sit near him when possible, even bringing him up when he was not there. It happened slowly. 

One evening, when it was your turn to host a dinner and game night, you decided to personally invite Joe, sending him a separate text from your group messages, “how romantic” you thought. It read “Hi, Joe! I hope to see you tonight, bring your game face because Claire and I always win!”. He responded promptly “I will be there, you obviously have not played against Jake and I”. You giggled, like actually, and then, panic set in. You looked around your apartment, he had never been inside and there was only 6 hours to make everything so… perfect. You had mentioned to Claire you had a little crush about a month ago and she has not let you forget since, as if he was not already always on your mind, but she was a true friend and knew how much this meant to you, even though you got crushes on everyone including the garbage man, the guy bagging your groceries, and the man walking his dog behind you late at night. But this felt entirely different. Claire helped you clean and reorganize your entire apartment, head to toe, which was not that wild since it wasn’t huge, she even helped you cook when you needed to shower to make sure you were ready long before anyone arrived in the fear that he may arrive early. Something he was notorious for as he thought he would be there to be able to help set up. He was so nice. 

Seven O’clock rolled around and Joe, on time as always, showed up with flowers and a dish, as always. He walked in as if he had known the place well but turned flush for a brief second when he saw you. He handed the flowers to you before digging his hands into his pockets and saying “ya know, haha, I don’t really think I knew your favorite flower so I uhhh- I got one of each that they had” he lifts one hand to scratch the back of his neck, “I am not realizing that was excessive I am sorry” he looked down briefly, fidgeting with his shoes. “Oh! Joe! How wonderful is this? Everything is in here! All of them! My mother used to own a floral shop and every month a new one would bloom, I could never pick a favorite!” you lifted the colorful bouquet up to your nose “this is so amazing- Thank you.” you said with much sincerity. All joe could do was smile his showy smile “what can I do to help” he suggested, looking to Claire so that he would not have to look at you holding a bouquet so big it almost hid your entire upper half. “Make yourself at home” you threw out while placing the beautiful vase as the centerpiece of your apartment, “really we are basically done!” you respond again, which wasn’t even true. Claire had helped you in the kitchen so long while also trying to get ready she ended up with half her hair up and curly and the other half frizzy and down, she really was such a good friend, you thought. Claire dismissed herself to finish getting ready and for a second it was just the two of you standing in your kitchen staring at one another.  

You guys always dressed up for these get-togethers and tonight you were donned in a navy blue chiffon maxi dress that you had worn once to a wedding, ironically you realize that Joe's navy suit pants went impeccable with his brown tie. You blushed a little. 

Your navy kitten heels clacked along the hardwood as you begin to set the table, Joe followed suit, placing great detail on the intentions of where you put stuff. If you fixed a knife he copied until it looked the same. You thought for a second- how has he never brought a girl to any of these events, surely there was someone in his life worth his weekends and unkempt hair. He never so much as mentioned dating casually. Maybe it was so obvious that a man like him would be in a relationship it didn’t even need to be said, but again, it has never been mentioned. Right as you began to freak out the oven dinged and there was a knock at the door. Your friends began filing in, filling the empty spaces on the table and counters with food and drinks of all kinds. Laughter ensued around the candle lit table, the oven and the wine made everyone warm, turning cheeks crimson, making some take their jackets off, loosen their ties, let their guards down a bit. As talk moved to the living-room you notice Joe make a face at Ben and Sophie who were trying to sit next to you, Sophie stood moving one space over and Joe plopped on the couch next to you “it was nothing” you thought “i’m overthinking things” you reassured yourself in your head. You tried to steal a glance from him a couple of times, the first chance the person to your left, Claire, made a recall to a joke that was said an hour prior, you turned to laugh and look at Joe, but when you turned you met his eye. “Was he already looking at me?” you thought. The second came once the six of you established teams for codenames, his opposing yours, you noticed that maybe he actually was looking at you. The third time felt intentional, your cheeks red, the strap to your dress kept falling off your shoulder, your hand was tucked under your chin you sitting on the floor leaning on the coffee table, Joe taking the couch leaning over the coffee table, the crowd gathered in conversation, you said something funny and quippy and turned your head to see if Joe laughed, you met eyes and stared a second longer than you meant to. When your brain caught up you realized he was mouthing “Hi” to you, for some reason you looked away before you could really acknowledge what just happened. “It was just hi” you thought. Some boldness inside you compelled you to move closer to him once your heart stopped racing, you abruptly stood, walked to the kitchen to grab wine and a cookie for two, and when you returned you sat closer, hanging out by his legs instead. You quickly realized that the feeling in your stomach you have been feeling has been butterflies, you were actually nervous when he bent down to talk to you, his hands around the cold glass again, his silver watch peaking out from his white button down, his hair messier than when he arrived, his tie looser, it all overwhelmed you how wonderful he was to be around and look at and talk to. His hand at one point brushed your elbow that was resting on the couch, the small touch sending sparks throughout your entire body. Electric and alive.

You could audibly hear your friends' conversations die down around you, yawns ensued, situationships were texted and see-ya-laters were said until it was -all of a sudden- just you and Joe in your apartment with dishes to clean and counters to wipe. Cleaning after parties was one of your favorite tasks, and a small- and I mean very small- part of you hoped he would not offer to help clean up and instead go home so you could turn on Alanis Morissette and have this done in 30 minutes. At this point in the night heels should have been off, ties undone and draped over shoulders, but instead you both were dressed to the nines, walking around awkwardness and saying anything to fill the silence. It meant a lot right now to you the way you both presented to each other, still trying to ‘swoon’ him. 

 You stood with your glass mid conversation and headed towards the kitchen and without prompting, Joe gathered dishes and headed in behind you, music you had on from earlier in the day played softly on a small speaker tucked on top of your fridge, you could hear the outline of what sounded like downtown lights, the kitchen was painted in gold lighting from the low lamps and candles littering the countertop, the big light felt harsh in any measure but the light airyness you felt right now the big light could probably blind you. “You do not have to help me clean up, Joe. Honestly, there is not much to clean up, I don’t even really need to do this right now. It is just nice when I can go to bed and the house is clean”. Joe, holding the white ceramic dish that was your grandmothers, took a step towards you “well- you said to make myself at home” he uttered, he took one step past you so that he was even closer and leaned into the sink to put the dish in the running water, when he pulled away he lingered slightly. Heat glowed on your cheeks. It was embarrassing, all he did was stand close to you and your breath hitched. Joe seemed to notice this, and then he got the sense that it was not a bad hitch of your breath or tense of your shoulders. You both continued to clear off the tables, put cards away, and wash, dry, put away dishes. It was the most intimate thing you have ever experienced in your entire life. Joes sleeves were rolled up so as to not get them wet, his hair flopping down as he ran the dry dishtowel around the inside and rim of a bowl, his laugh when he was about to say something he thought you would laugh at. The conversation hit a lull. Not an awkward one at all, a silence that came with an understanding of one another. It was late for you, about eleven pm, for some reason tonight you felt like you could stay up the entire night talking to him and would not get tired.