#undomesticated

stainless steel pot

the undomesticated human stands in front of the stove

a stainless steel pot stands on the induction cooker, its body heating up surely and silently and invisibly

the water droplets from its pre-rinse have long evaporated, olive oil sitting quietly in the shininess

the unknowing human proceeds to pour the pre-packaged, free-of-charge microwaveable spaghetti bolognese into the pot

the first drop of dubious sauce free falls

contact with the hot pot resulted in

A WHEEZE AND A POP AND A SPLITTER SPLATTER SHRILL

the oil and whatever-substance combo of the microwaveable vapourises in seconds upon greeting the angry heat of the pan

the word “vapourises” cannot be more apt as the oil is carried in a steam and rose so quickly into the ceiling, the minuscule particles made visible in its own shadow cast by the ceiling lights

the shocked human says “oh what the fug” out loud - which was (politely) reacted to by the neighbour gently sliding their door shut

with a strange calmness and a bare minimum sense of danger, the human relocates the scalding pot using dishcloths from the cooker into the sink. blessed by a scant knowledge of kitchen safety, the human knew better than to flood the pot with water

20 minutes and a safe dinner alternative later (water-boiled dumplings), the human scrubs hard at the blackened pot - ironically burning more calories than what the food has provided

Undomesticated – Cécile Simonis Asks Us to Embrace Our Inner Wilderness in Her HCZF Debut Comic

HCZF MONTH! One of the most pleasurable things about being involved in the UK comics festival circuit is the opportunities it provides to meet new creators on a more one-to-one basis and chat about their work. I have been involved for several years now with ELCAF’s Springboard Meetings (essentially portfolio reviews) and they’ve introduced me to a number of artists who I have gone on to feature…

by Andy Oliver

HCZF MONTH! One of the most pleasurable things about being involved in the UK comics festival circuit is the opportunities it provides to meet new creators on a more one-to-one…

You know what I always wonder? Why do people always zero in on the most negative things? By people I mean Nigerians. My people. And by negative things I mean your least attributes. (Is that correct grammar? Lol)

You see you put so much into certain aspects of your life and people only choose to focus on the things you don’t. You try daily to do your best and the one day you take a step back, they break out the pitch forks and put you on trial. Suddenly you are the worst of the worst.

You see, like I said I did not have a rough childhood at all. I had a great one. Much like the life of a princess or noble born young woman in the English Middle Ages, I grew up in a big house surrounded by people in much smaller homes and less fortunate situations. Unlike those English princess I was raised to appreciate everyone and treat everyone with respect. I have manners, I am polite and I try to see the best in people and be helpful any which way I can. Those are my greatest virtues but nobody gives a damn because in Nigeria, a woman’s greatest virtue is to be domesticated. Feminism be damned in fact I’m pretty sure it’s categorized as a sin because after all the Bible says women only need concern themselves with making a home, food and babies. Manners be damned.

I’m not a domesticated person and I’m tired of apologizing for it. I know how to cook, clean and etc but I hate it all. I keep things clean because I hate cleaning up messes. I make sure my fridge is stocked with simple foods like fruits and sandwiches so there’s always something to eat. If I crave more I make more, if someone makes a request for more, I make more hence if I don’t have do it if I don’t. Does that make me a bad person?

Let me elaborate: let’s say I’m binging Netflix on my laptop and someone needs me to make lunch. I’ll happily do it because I’m a polite person that’s happy to do favors for others. I put my liking of the person above my dislike of the task they would have me do. Now, no one’s hungry and there’s no fancy food in the fridge? Do I stress myself making lunch. Nope. Does that make me a bad personality?

You decide. ’m done giving a damn. I’m Tsema Awani and I’m an undomesticated Nigerian feminist who will continue Icontinue to do her best.