Jacob and Bella would be divorced by their thirties and you shanât convince me otherwise.

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Jacob and Bella would be divorced by their thirties and you shanât convince me otherwise.

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Twilight Thoughts: JJK Ino Takuma (NSFW) â¨
Warnings: (18+/NSFW/MDNI): very brief mention of intruder fantasies A/N: Because Ino needs more love...
This man is the human embodiment of earnestness
All he wants to do is please you, and he will go to great lengths to do it
Any position, any type of toy, anything you want to use, anytime, anywhere: over a railing, pressed to the glass, on the counter, against the wall, under a table, in the hall, bathroom stall, at the mall, in the club heâll show you love, in the shower - fuck you for hours, he canât stop, youâre just too hot (you get the picture)
Ino is a big fan of education and youâre his teacher. He wants to learn EVERYTHING about you, especially the things that get your pussy to swimming pool-levels of wetness
High-key has a thing for older women - big MILF energy
His praise kink is real. So smug when he makes you cum so hard youâre shaking from head to toe and tears of ecstasy are running down your cheeks in mascara-streaked tracts. The messier you look, the prouder he is (like he aced a test heâd been secretly studying for since he first laid eyes on you). A well-placed compliment during sex and the man revs up 200000%: hips and glutes jackhammering you into the mattress or wherever else you happen to be fucking
Dry humping is one of his favourite things (especially if youâve got his black sweater on with nothing else underneath)
Loves to casually slip a hand under the loose collar of the sweater you're wearing (read: his) and caress your breasts as you're cuddled next to each other on the couch, "watching" something on TV
Heâd be reduced to soft, whimpered moans as you grind into him on the couch, hips drawing circles on the tops of his muscular thighs, core applying pressure to his rapidly stiffening cock with each go-round
And when he canât take any more, heâll fold you in half and settle his weight between your legs, pushing up against you just so until youâre panting into his mouth in between kisses when your tongues arenât sliding past one another because you just canât get enough of each other's taste
Ino Takuma LIVES to eat pussy, especially when itâs through your panties: will lick and suck and tease his way through cotton/silk/satin/lace until that item of clothing is completely drenched with his spit and your juices (feels like that man is trying to quench his thirst with your body)
If you want him to indulge your intruder fantasies, he would totally comply and fuck you with that black mask over his face
Aftercare? Inoâs got you covered. Tell him what you need ONCE and heâll literally take notes on his phone so that youâve got that warm washcloth, glass of water, etc. every single time.
A massive cuddler, especially after sex. Expect to fall asleep to him spooning you, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist and him breathing softly into your hair (he will literally be dreaming about making love to you again and again)
â˰ The beautiful Esme -4hr 43min
I 100% believe that Carlisle took this photo himself and keeps it in his office at work (he loves to show her off) áŚ
a thought: you know that post about Bella just driving to the Cullens house in the middle of the night to ask them questions about vampires?
Sister Swan does something very similar.
But, of course, her lover lives in Italy (with monthly visits to Forks to see her) so instead it's a group chat/email chain/whatever where the Volturi members chime in about thier historical experiences/lives as vampires.
And eventually, Sister Swan brings something up that one of them told her...which is very different from what one of the Cullens told Bella, which leads to them realizing that a vampire that drinks human blood vs a vampire that drinks animal blood are two VERY different experiences. So it ends with the Swan sisters sitting on Bella's bedroom floor and making a compare/contrast list of EVERYTHING they know and Edward + the Volturi lover just walk in on them like
My Roman Empire is that most of the Volturi memberâs names in twilight wouldnât be their actual given names.
â˝ď¸Aro: Akrodamos, Aristandros or Arandros.
After some googling, Aristandros seems the most plausible? Meaning âBest manâ or âExcellent Manâ.
Aroâs era was Mycenaean Greece. Their script was Linear B, this offered the first written records of the Greek language and from what Iâve read Aro would be a shorten version of Aristandros.
â˝ď¸Caius: Kassondros, Gaius
So Caius is actually a Latin name (Gaius), it wouldnât have existed in 1300 BC and certainly not in Mycenaean Greece. Caius probably would have changed his name. After some more googling, the authentic Mycenaean Greek name that could have at least evolved or be changed into Caius would be Kassandros.
â˝ď¸Marcus: Areimenes, Makhawon.
Again Marcus is from Latin origin đ If we take the Roman god of war, Mars, the equivalent in 1300bc Greece would be Ares. Following that, it could have been Areimenes. However if you want the same âMaâ sound then Makhawon is more fitting, derived from the word makhe meaning âbattleâ.
â˝ď¸Jane: Iohanna, Jehanne.
The name Jane didnât exist until centuries after 800AD (when she was born). She was born to an Anglo-Saxon woman and Frankish soilder father. Iohanna would be rare in Anglo-Saxon England, but her father being Frankish could bring in some Latin names. This name would have evolved into Jane. Jehanne is the older French form of Iohannes. The name would have still been uncommon but with Frankish influence could be plausible? Only issue is most Jehannes are documented way later than 800 AD.
â˝ď¸Alec: Alexander/Alric.
OK HEAR ME OUT!! Alexander would have been rare for English commoners but with his father being a Frankish soilder, a more Roman sounding name like Alexander would have fit. Frankish empire obsessed with Roman heritage so it could have fit? But a more Saxon name would have been Alric, more acceptable for locality. Personally I like both, I suppose Alric would fit better historically.
DisclaimerâI am in no way, shape or form a history expert, I just enjoy learning about history as a pastime, therefore created my following thoughts and analysis on the Volturi coven from twilightâ
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Sometimes I think about how Edward Cullen could hear everything going on in Bellaâs body, especially her stomach digesting. Her gastrointestinal activity. He knew when she had to fart. He knew when she was trying not to fart. He knew the fart was coming before she did.
animals being terrified of vampires makes perfect sense lore-wise but it's so sad and unfair because Alistair should have gotten to keep his horse and his falcons and im still so sad about it
Donât know if this has made it to tumblr yet, but people have started making the brilliantly accurate comparison in that Dispatch is just Twilight for men and goddamn it could not be more right