#tw scissors

Scissor me timbers.... that's a lovely username idea thank you

Hello, looks like we met again

I'm still alive, do not worry. I'm very tired and mentally, i don't know, really unstable right now. I will tell the things that happened.

Last night I played a game about obsession, a game about a man self isolating himself from his girlfriend then killing her when she tries to leave him, and feeling very guilty.

Your guilt will not purify you.

I would not kill someone, but the game gave me shivers, you know? I felt very threatened. I kept shaking and couldn't breathe, I left my lights open that night.

I went to the balcony, which is in my room. I had a big scissor with me. I sat at the cold ground to the morning. To 6 a.m. I was left with my thoughts. I cried, sobbed, left a little scar on my hand with the scissor, picked up the scab or smth on my knee and it bleeded so bad, looked down, imagined myself jumping down. I was really tempted to do something. But guilt.

My guilt wouldn't purify me

I thinked about my dad and how it would affect him. What if this religion is true? Then I would go to hell. I didn't wanted that.

But since I hurt my knee badly, I struggled to walk today. And these monkeys at school said "ohh what did you do last night????????? U r struggling to walk hahahaha!!!!" It made me feel disgusting. I had an episode at school too.

Also the star's new crush came to the class, didn't helped, I felt worse. This girl fucking looks amd acts like me.

Anyways, today was good expect these, I guess? I have only 3 exams left. Goodnight, lovely people. I have to sleep now.