#tva!loki

 “Tell me.” Loki spoke between kisses, each one slower and more deliberate than the last. “Has every person you fucked loved you as much as I?”

You shook your head. “Good.” His lips were on your pantyline, pressing his tongue flat against the crease your undergarments made. “And tell me, my purest, have they waited as long as I have?”

It doesn't take very long for Loki to realize that this place is familiar, too familiar. After walking around town for a few moments, he knows it's not just his imagination. This is where he met you, in another timeline of course. All those years ago.

When Loki was younger, before Thor's attempted coronation and all that, he used to sneak through these portals that even Heimdall couldn't see. One of them would lead to Midgard, to this very town. At first, it had been fun, mostly something he did out of curiosity. Exploring the realm without being watched. Loki had been intrigued by people and their customs.

Then he had met you.

To this day, the Trickster's heart swells at the shared memories. To think the god of mischief had fallen for a mortal. If Thor or his friends had found out, Loki would've never heard the end of it. Looking back now, something like that would've been the least of his worries.

The few years you had spent together were brief yet some of the best years of his existence. You had fallen for him, not knowing he was a god, a prince or any of that. No, you fell for Loki for who he was. Saw the sides of him he kept hidden from everyone. And in return, Loki had seen just how wonderful humanity could be. How you, as an individual, made him believe in love. Selfless, real, passionate love.

Then Loki had trusted you with the truth. For a while, everything had been beautiful. No one on Asgard knew the prince was sneaking off to Midgard to see this mortal, and no one on Earth knew or tried to come between you. It had been just the two of you and nothing else mattered.

It's why Loki feels a mixture of overwhelming emotions swirling within him as he walks the familiar streets. It may be in another timeline and things could very well be different here, but many things look exactly the same. Everywhere he looks is a memory that unveils from the depths of his mind. He swears he tried ice cream from that shop once after you insisted he'd like it. You had been right of course.

"Weird…" Mobius mutters, his eyes glued to the device. "We're getting closer to it. It ain't moving at all," He explains and points at the red dot on the screen.

"Perhaps the anomaly is asleep?" Loki suggests, trying to figure out why it isn't moving. Something doesn't feel quite right though.

"Well they won't see us coming, that's for sure."

Loki just nods, too occupied with other things to even respond properly. Is it a coincidence that the anomaly has led them here? To a place so important to Loki?

Soon enough, Loki and Mobius are looking out to a field behind some houses. The sun is beginning to set, painting everything it touches with a golden hue. It's beautiful, just as Loki remembers it. That field out there is perhaps too familiar. By now, he's concerned about the coincidences. If the anomaly has anything to do with you, Loki isn't sure how he'd handle himself.

Do you even exist in this timeline?

A lump forms in his throat as Loki thinks about it. He had to say goodbye to you once already, over a decade ago. It might not be a long time for a being such as him, but a decade without you has already felt like a lifetime. Time is cruel, especially to mortals. What is even crueler is fate who had decided that the brief time you were promised in the first place would be cut so much shorter.

Loki had come to see you one last time without knowing it was the last. You hadn't been well. It was both a blessing and a curse that there had been enough time to say goodbye yet it had been the hardest thing Loki had done. Holding you, telling you how much you meant to him and promising you that he would find a way to cure you. That he would bring you to Asgard and make everything better, knowing damn well there was nothing that could be done. Now all these years later he can only hope that he had told you what you wanted and needed to hear before your time was up. Was it the right or wrong thing to do to create false hope? Did you know?

"What's going on?" Mobius asks with worry, noticing that Loki froze up. He knows Loki well enough by now to know when something's not quite right.

"This place," Loki shakes his head and decides to slip out a hint of truth without revealing too much, "I've been here before."

The wind plays with the flowers growing out on the fields, carrying the sweet late summer scent with it. There's a few people out there, some on a picnic as others read in the shade that the trees offer nearby. Everything about the scene seems serene. Once upon a time, Loki had been out there with you watching the stars. You loved his stories about all the places he had been. Loki recalls how deeply curious you were about the universe and all the beings living here.

"Do you think that's a coincidence?" Mobius asks with growing concern. Sure, Loki has been to a lot of places, he's a century old being but this still seems fishy. For all the places an anomaly could be hiding in.

Before Loki can answer, he sees someone.

There you are.

Healthy, living and breathing. You're in that shirt he remembers you loving so much because it had been a gift from a friend. You're walking down a path, on your way home presumably. That smile, so sweet and happy, is powerful enough to hit Loki's soul like a punch to the gut.

According to the TVA device, it's 2011. In Loki's timeline, you never saw 2011 yet in this timeline you're smiling and safe. Walking home as if nothing bad has ever happened at all.

Loki holds his breath, unable to peel his eyes off of you. There's only a few dozen feet between you and him but it feels like an ocean. After a decade of mourning you, to see your face like this is surreal. Even for him. Only now does the multiverse and multiple timelines feel like a reality. He's being hit in the face with the cold, hard truth that in other timelines everything can be so familiar yet so different all at once.

Mobius follows Loki's gaze, quickly noticing what has taken his friend's breath away. He has read Loki's file a million times so of course he recognizes you. Or rather this version of you. You're the one that got away, the last piece of happiness in Loki's life before the 'downfall' as some call it.

"Um... if you're wondering, they're not the anomaly," Mobius is the first one to speak, just trying to be reassuring. The device shows that the anomaly isn't moving so it can't possibly be you as you stroll down a path.

Loki nods, unsure if he should be relieved or disappointed.

"Of course," he clears his throat and takes a deep breath. It's surprisingly difficult to find his words in this moment. Then Loki looks back at you as the path brings you closer. With each step, his heart begins to race like crazy. What is he supposed to do? Should he say something? Would you recognize him?

You notice the two men just standing there, in strange brown suits. One of them in particular seems struck by the sight of you. Strangely, he doesn't scare you. He's cute.

"Hi," You smile at him as you walk past the man. Perhaps you look like someone he knows? That is the only sensible explanation that comes to mind. Not that you think of it too much, as they are just strangers.

Loki is frozen. You walk right past him. For better of for worse, you have no idea who he is. That kills that tiny piece of hope Loki felt in that moment, that hope that he can't deny no matter how hard he tries. After all this time, he still misses you. He's still trying to fix everything.

"Hey," he manages after a while, unsure if you even hear it as you don't stop to talk. Of course, you don't have any reason to. It's not really you. In this timeline, this universe, this other you has places to be and see. As bittersweet as it is, Loki tries to find comfort in the fact that in another life, you get to live even if it's without him.

Mobius looks at the screen again. Suddenly the red dot vanishes. The temporal anomaly just jumped timelines.

"Darn it," He curses and puts the device down.

Loki doesn't question it. He wants to see you make your way home safely. A part of him wants to run after you, talk to you, get to know you all over again. But he can't. Loki is stuck to the ground like a statue and he knows deep down that another you can't replace what he knew existed in the past. Nor would it be right.

As you vanish into a building, Loki finally tears his eyes away. His eyes sting with the threat of tears. Somehow, in this moment, it feels like he's gone back to his own time when he had just said his final goodbye. Loki can't forget, no matter how much he wants to, when he came to visit you but you had already passed. He could bury you but not these emotions.

"Hey, I'm sorry," Mobius puts his hand on Loki's shoulder, trying to offer him support.

Loki just nods and tries so hard to toughen up. As if seeing another you didn't just shake him up from the core.

"It's alright," Loki insists, "where were we?"

Mobius doesn't buy it but he won't pry either. Loki will talk if he wants to talk.

"The anomaly jumped," Mobius reveals while tapping the device, "kinda weird timing if you ask me. Didn't move the entire time and-" Mobius hesitates, unsure how Loki would react if he spoke your name. He decides not to.

"It's like we were led here on purpose. For you to see..."

"I know," Loki quickly spits out, sensing that Mobius is being wary. He isn't stupid. He can't help but suspect something strange is going on as well. It can't be a coincidence that they were led to this timeline, chasing some anomaly who vanishes as soon as Loki saw you. Loki is the god of mischief after all and he can tell when he's being set up for something.

Then the question is, who is the anomaly and why would they bring them here?

A/N: Writing this made me feel like it was 2017 again when all I could do was write weird angsty Loki fics with no real plot, just yapping.

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“are you alright?”

oh, you were pissed off, and not in a healthy amount. you were unhealthily pissed off. him asking you that question while you both stood in the middle of the wilderness clearly was not a great way to have a brand new conversation that opened with him doubting your mental state in some way. a loose nightdress was the only thing keeping you warm and as much as it looked so good on you, you were now beginning to hate it with all of your soul. 

that and the god who dragged you out of your home to fulfill a mission, loki.

“it’s almost twelve o'clock and you’re expecting me to be okay out here, in the cold, outside of my damn apartment, dressed in this sleeveless, thin cotton dress– are you that dense!?” anger was just inching closer with each second that passed as the god looked you from top to bottom, keeping his lower lip under his front teeth as he tilted his head.

‘right, he was a front giant. i forgot,’ you thought, huffing as you crossed your arms in both the burning annoyance and in the cold. to your surprise, that ticking bomb inside your head wasn’t really going to do much to keep you warm. 

“why didn’t you bring a jacket, then?” he questioned again. “you showed up at my doorstep panicking! i didn’t have time to get one!” you complained.

and then, there was silence, a moment of clarity which was later interrupted by the god once again. this time, he laughed, shaking his head at the supposed funny moment that took place earlier. “... oh, my friend, i do apologize–”

“you should,” you quickly snapped back, walking next to him as you followed his directions as if you weren’t familiar with the location. “now, i’m freezing like shit here– what are you doing?”

without thinking twice, the thick, dark blazer he wore was slipping off of his shoulders and arms as he gave you a state, later offering it to you by nudging your arm with his knuckles. “come on, wear it. the cold never bothered me anyway,” he said, both of his eyebrows raised as his eyes glimmered, hoping that you’d just take the blazer from him.

“... thanks a lot, elsa.” you still spoke in that grumbling tone you always had when it came to him but deep down, it was all for the humor… and the never-ending stage of denial. 

yes.

it’s been a while since those feelings for him bloomed like a flower on a spring’s day.

and now, you’re stuck with him like a pine tree on a winter’s night. “what are you even doing here? didn’t you tell me that we’re just supposed to see each other throughout time like… periodical visits?” you questioned, still wondering why he was now standing next to you. 

although he and mobius did need the help of a licensed historian, it was clear that you weren’t like the two of them. you had an entirely different role and just like what they both would say, you should play your role in the timeline. 

“why? isn’t this just like one of those periodical visits as well?” his shoulders slowly rose throughout the question as you sighed. 

3 days ago. it’s been 3 days since loki and mobius left…  and now, one of them is back again and it didn’t seem like he’s in trouble as you assumed.

“yeah, but like, i thought you’d come see me a few months after the last visit,” you muttered, taking steps with him slower this time, clearly diving deep into the talk. “you know? like the last time… for you, only a week passed but for me, it took six and a half months. is there another problem we have to fix or is this gonna be your thing?”

in return, he chuckled and asked back, “can’t i just pay my favourite historian a visit?”

“... but i’m the only historian you know–” “shut up.”

though it sounded bitter, both of you still smiled over the friendly banter and somehow, it was nice to know that loki traveled through time again just to meet up with you.

as a busy historian constantly checking if the two tva employees or sylvie herself made any of those rewrites in the many pages of history, you never really had a chance to go out with friends… you weren’t even sure if you still had contact with those old friends of yours.

in some way, you were lonely. 

you’d never admit it to yourself or to anyone around you but it was undeniable that you still were. “so, what you’re telling me is that you probably got bored and thought to yourself that you should seek me out just so you could take me here in the middle of the night? for fun? is this your brilliant idea of fun?” you questioned, syncing your pace with him as leaves and snow rustled beneath your boots. 

again, he chuckled. “well… it’s not exactly boredom,” the god answered, taking a deep breath right after. “... i did have plans to see you tonight.”

‘... what?’ that one word danced around your mind in circles because not once did you think of that possibility.

he just said he wanted to see you exactly tonight, how could that happen?

“and it’s getting late, i know. i’m sorry for dragging you out here but this one…” he trailed off, taking another deep breath as he suddenly stopped walking… and of course you did the same, choosing to face the trees instead of him. 

“this one’s important.”

then, he raised his hand mid-air, just above his own shoulder as his fingers fluttered, emitting vibrant sparks in every color you could think of. he had a genuine smile on his face, his emerald eyes staring back at you while you focused on how the sparks flew and twirled around his palm. once you looked at him, you held in your breath, absolutely overwhelmed by the situation. “... loki.”

“i’m in love with you,” he said softly, his eyes turning glossy, admitting to it all wholeheartedly. no more secrets now. “and it’s killing me to keep these words to myself for longer so nothing’s stopping me from saying them now. i am so in love with you, y/n… i can’t imagine not seeing you every single minute.”

with the sparks from his own palm flying into the air, syncing with the fireworks that blasted into the dawn skies, he pulled you close, the lips you’ve dreamed of every night brushing against yours soothingly as you started forgetting about how cold it was… the kiss he was giving you was enough to keep you warm.

even too warm, perhaps…

“whoa– hey, wait a second.” you pulled away from him, your palms touching his chest, grazing a little bit against the fabric of his ironed as if it was to restrict you from letting the kiss get deeper than expected. “... we just kissed? is this for real? or are you enchanting me? loki, i swear–,” you were then cut-off by quick peck on your cheek, his hands touching the back of yours so delicately as he looked at you with relief, shaking his head.

“this is for real, trust me.” he smirked, smothering his lips against yours once again as your eyelids closed shut, indulging everything he’s been giving you right at that moment.