#turning 20

31/03/2026

Been a while... so much has happened in the past 2 months, in my life, in the world. Its like one second I feel like I have everything under control, making progress towards my goals and getting better at handling life then the next second everything is falling apart. I tried to be prepared for every lecture by doing the pre-class activities but it didnt take me long to fall behind on that too.

I don't know should I write again? I fr doubt my writing skills. If anyone sees this can yall give me feedback 🙏. Please and thank you ‼️

I'll be turning twenty next month! I'm excited because its going to be Beatles themed!!!! Yayayaya I've been making decorations and printing funny pictures of em. I'll put them on the front door so its the first thing my friends see when they knock. I still need to figure out what other decorations to make. If yall have any ideas or recommendations let me know!

Monday | 05/12 | 11:00 p.m.

Just one hour before I turn 20.

It doesn’t feel different, exactly—but somehow, it does. Like I’m on the edge of something new, even if everything around me looks the same.

Last year, around this time, I was excited. But turning 19 turned out to be my worst birthday. Chaotic, traumatic, and heavy in ways I still don’t fully know how to explain. Honestly, the year that followed was mostly the same—tragic, draining, exhausting. Physically, mentally, emotionally.

But the last few months of being 19 were different. They were quiet. Introspective. Transformative in ways I never expected. I started reflecting more, feeling more, understanding myself better. It wasn’t always easy, but it was fulfilling. And for the first time in a long time, I started dreaming about the future again.

lol my 20th birthday

How the hell do you dress for a winter birthday and not be cold, I was freeezingggg omg 😭😭