Your words have bled into the ink, And now it’s all spilling, Slowly.

You left your music in my playlists- Sent a cutter a song about addiction, asshole, But my nightmares weren’t having nightmares anymore, They were just sad, the poor things, The monsters and the teeth that I curated under my bed, They were all covered in tears, they wouldn’t stop crying.

No, the floodwater wasn’t clear, but it also wasn’t mud, It was the inky red of spilled blood, Do you know how many bloodstains I’ve had to clean up off my bedroom floor? Do you even care?

I’m setting fire to my head now, Or maybe it was my pillows I set fire to, I just didn’t want them to smell like you. And now I’ve spent more money on condoms and alcohol, And concealer to hide hickeys, Than any sixteen year old should have the right to- No, I don’t have the best coping mechanisms, but that’s something you already knew. At least you kissed your knuckles before splitting my heart in two, At least you got that right.

Is this second-person point of view accusatory enough for you? You, you, you, it’s all you. Am I getting under your skin yet? Am I still there? Did I ever leave? Or do you still read our conversations from time to time, Look for me in the hallway and canteen lines, Or break a little when you see me smile? Catch my eye, and see our history play out in double time?

I can’t wait to get drunk this weekend and have an excuse to message you again, See, I don’t deserve you in sunlight, Daytime sheds too much light on my sins, And I think you have a girlfriend now, not that it matters- No, I already loved you in guilt, In that secret space between Alcohol and 2AM, And old habits are hard to break.

But no, I don’t quite love you, No, I don’t quite miss you, Now you’re just a bad habit- You’re just a scratch I can’t quite itch, An ache, burrowed in some bone the doctors can’t reach, A piece of fat dissolving in the bloodstream.  There, I’ve said it now. There’s nothing left in these pens now, I can throw them away now, I’ve sucked them all dry, the ink’s out.

i’ve read some GREAT standalones these past few months that i want to share with you all, but now i’m in a bit of a book slump so send me your favourite series and I’ll rec you a standalone!

rules:

mbf moi

reblog/ like this post (both work)

send me your favourite book SERIES !!

(blograte format under the cut)

The Shadowhunters Chronicles Social Media AU~ Snapchat Edition~ Tessa Gray & Jessamine Lovelace (Tessamine)

ii. The therapist diagnosed me with monosyllabic Sad: Your life is too short for you to want to be dead. I said, you’re supposed to be helping my brother. She nodded, then sighed, then said, His life is long enough for him to want to be dead.

So I nodded, shook my head, and again she sighed: Write a bucket list. Let it give you hope for the future, Nurture something positive in your mind, Keep a journal with every shade the colour of the sky.

iii. And I thought that sounded beautifully poetic, So I did. And it was filled with ballerinas and books, and smoke the colour of dreams. It was filled with London and Paris, And St. Mark's Square in Venice.

It was filled with a lover whose touch reminded me of the ocean, who captured fireflies and my imagination. It had rekindled friendships and kisses that taste like fresh rain.

It was ink and paper and pen, with something Akin to magic captured in such trivialities- It lifted me up. It taught me to write again.

iv. So based on a conversation with an old romance- a rekindled friendship, you could say or perhaps, most would call it a mistake- I took to ink and paper and pen and let words flow Of the summer I went insane.

Welcome back! We hope your summer/winter has been good. Ours has definitely improved as we’ve finally voted on our new members! We loved all your applications, and if you aren’t, know that you will always have the chance to join us in the future. Without further ado, our newest accomplices:

@annalightwood @ariadnebridgestock @belcvrt @immortaltsc @lesbian-annalightwood @lexmallalexnullla @lxcieherondale @mxgnusbxne @sophielightwocd @thewarlocksquad

If you were tagged, you will be messaged shortly by one of our members with an invite to the discord, the link to join the network, and some other things like the tagging system, etc!

Thank you all for supporting this network & both our canon and non-canon sapphics in the Shadowhunter Chronicles <3

@tscsapphicnet event #1: favourite sapphic pairing → helen + aline

Welcome back!! I want to mention first that we loved all the creations for our first event & have been really pleased about the reaction to this network. To celebrate both that and the three month mark since our first member search, we’re once again opening member applications.

to enter

reblog this post

fill out this typeform

follow the network

follow our members (optional)

extra information

as promised before, participating in our most recent event will give you more of a chance becoming a new member but it’s definitely not mandate

applications will be open until july 31st

we will announce the new members on august 2nd

If you’ve been accepted as a new member, one of our members will send you a direct message on tumblr, with the link to join both the network and the discord

We’ll be hosting more member searches in the future, but for now, good luck!