#tsamsmoon

i had a thought on the MidnightJester ship and I couldn’t stop thinking about this ship. The Jester Trio.

"Will it stop? If I go with you?" The celestial animatronic asked, his voice low and tired as he looked up at the taller, Lunar animatronic, his black and orange eyes meeting purple and red. Well maybe "lunar" wasn't the right word anymore. He looked more like a mad scientist, complete with goggles hanging around his neck, the same pair Solar owned before he died. Nexus shrugged then nodded a little.

"Sort of? The voices and hallucinations won't ever really stop but there's enough to distract from those things, for a while anyway."

For the last few months Solar had been hearing and seeing things, but any time anyone asked himhe'd say he was fine. He couldn't even bring himself to tell Earth everything. But this...while he didn't doubt her ability to handle heavy stuff, he didn't want to worry Earth with ALL of his problems.

A light chuckle left his lips as he realized how Ironic this was. From what he'd heard of Nexus doing Solar was doing the same things he did- hiding or lying about how he felt, bottling up emotions or even forcing himself to work on projects until he was well under 50% charge, and Jack or Earth would drag him to bed to rest. All of this certainly wasn't helped by the part of his own code that was made and intertwined with Eclipses', a familiar yet strange itch to constantly prove himself itching under his skin, insecurity and inferiority buzzing through his circuits.

He glanced up, and for a moment he stared behind Nexus, seeing Sun. But not this dimensions Sun, no.

Sunny. His own original Sun.

Sunny stood behind Nexus, silently shaking his head as if he knew what Solar was thinking. Maybe he did, even in death Sunny always seemed to know no matter what.

Then he heard a voice, raspy and familiar near his ear.

His Moon, Moonbeam.

Moonbeam was whispering to him over his shoulder.

'You should do it.'

'Go with him, Eclipse.'

'You've already lied to your family, hidden things. The same things he experienced and they think he's crazy. What will they think of you?'

'Why not say fuck it, be an Eclipse. Sooner or later you all fall to madness no matter what. And you'd be with your best friend again, too. You know I'm right.'

Again, he saw Sunny shaking his head and even mouthed 'please, don't do it Eclipse...'

Solar shook his head and covered his ears, fingers moving up to grab and lightly pull his rays, only for a moment before he felt hands gently grab his wrists and pull his hands away from his head. His eyes rose to meet purple and red, something like concern etched on his face.

"Solar? You with me?"

Solar took a few deep breaths, closed his eyes, and nodded.

"Yeah, I...I'm solid, Moon."

Nexus smiled a bit. Solar was the only one he'd ever allow to call him 'Moon' again. No one else had that privilege.

"Good. So, Solar? Do you have an answer?"

The Eclipse looked at him, then away, then closed his eyes and took a breath.

"Yes."

Moon looked at him, a wider grin forming on his face and a hint of eagerness and excitement in his voice. "Really? Even though you'd be leaving Earth? Jack?"

A twinge of guilt settled in his core at that thought, feeling a bit bad since they went through so much to have him back, but if Moon couldn't be here, neither could he.

"I'm sure."

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sunny shake and lower his head and vanish, Moonbeam taking his place with a sharp grin, but he said nothing.

"I'll meet you outside then, if you need to take anything." Nexus said as he stood and handed him a small box before he teleported away.

Solar took the box and teleported to Moon's lab. At a counter he felt for a switch underneath, pressing when he found it, which opened an adjacent panel. Inside were five purple crystals crackling with energy. Putting them in the box he went home to get ready.

Solar sighed as he returned home, tucking the box and his blueprints and notebooks into a bag. He left his toolbox and clothes behind. He'd get new ones in his new home later. He left a note on the bed.

'Sun.

I'm sorry but I left. I don't think I can stay here without Moon. I'm alive but I just can't stay without him. Please tell Earth, Jack, the others that I'm sorry. Sorry for leaving, sorry for lying and hiding everything, sorry I didn't say goodbye this time. Please, don't look for me this time. I love you guys, all of you.

-Solar'

With that, he shut off the lights, closed the door, and made his way outside, joining Nexus at a portal. With one look back, he entered through with him.

Yeah, it hurt to leave his family again. But he'd rather have just Moon and no one else than everyone but Moon. After all, Moon was something extra special to him. Moon was safety, warmth. His own little safe space.

Moon followed after Monty, Solar close behind them, though Moon's mind was somewhere else further away than here.

He didn't know how to tell any of them. Hell he's barely accepted it himself.

They stepped inside. Why did they have to be here already, at least give him some time to prepare himself...

Monty went over and took Earths’ hands, pulling her from her baking. "Turn it all off, hon, and come sit down. I gotta tell you somethin'."

Earth seemed a bit puzzled and a little worried, seeing the looks on Solar and Moon's faces, and noticing a lack of Sun.

She didn't question it though, turning everything off as Solar collected Lunar, joining the rest of them in the living room.

"So what's going on?" Earth looked at Monty.

He sighed. "Think you can handle some really bad news?"

Earth looked at Lunar, both giving each other a very concerned look. "I don't think I like the sound of that, Monty."

"You won't. I mean I got good news too but it's attached to the bad news."

"Then start with the good news, please? Maybe it'll make the bad news less bad?"

She was as hopeful as Sun sometimes...Moon lightly shook his head at that.

Monty sighed again, taking a moment to steel himself before speaking.

"Dark Sun is dealt with. He won't be an issue anymore. Nexus is being held somewhere he can't escape from."

'Now came the harder part' Moon thought, his mind wandering as he stared at the floor, thoughts running a million miles a second.

How would they react? Besides the obvious, of course. Earth was sensitive, one of the two closest to Sun- shed been there when Moon died, when everything was going wrong. Would she have another breakdown like when Solar died?

Lunar was pretty detached from his emotions. Maybe due to his trauma, his training, both. But he was also close with Sun. Sun had been there for him when he was getting away from Eclipse, built his gift, Lunar went to him when he couldn't go to Moon or Earth.

And Dazzle...Gods Dazzle won't understand where Sun is, what happened to him, why he isn't here or coming back...

He was pulled back to reality as a sudden sob tore through the air. Coming back to his senses he saw Monty holding Earth close as she sobbed against him.

Lunar was staring off past them, hands gripping at the fabric of his pants. Finally he forced himself to look at Moon, a smile on his face and a disbelieving laugh on his lips.

"This...this has to be a joke, right? A terrible, horrible, no good, very bad joke...p-payback for the computer thing, right? Right, Moon, tell us it's an awful joke...!"

The silence from Moon, Solar and Monty told him it wasn't a joke.

His smile and laughter fell into quiet crying.

"What's wrong down here?"

And just like that, the moment Moon dreaded had come.

He looked up to the stairs seeing Jack, Dazzle and Molten all peering down at them, worry across their face.

Moon sighed and gathered his nerves, excusing himself briefly before heading up, ushering the three back into Jack and Dazzle's room.

"What' wrong? Why is everyone so sad?" Dazzle looked up at him as he shut the door and sat by the bunk beds.

It took a moment before he finally spoke.

"Sun died."

As expected Dazzle seemed more confused than upset. Jack and Molten however...

"What...do you mean...died?"

"Who." Jack placed a hand on Dazzle's shoulder like she was the one they could hear sobbing and screaming from downstairs.

"Dont...don't worry about it right now you two. Please, this...isn't the time, Solar or I will fill you in later...can you two go downstairs, please? Dazzle, you stay for a bit."

She looked at her two friends, both nodding slightly before they left and closed the door behind them.

Dazzle approached Moon, sitting with him, hugging her Sun plushie a little tighter.

"What's going on...? Why's everyone so sad? What happened to Sun?"

"The best way I can explain it, Dazzle...what happened to you, you know what happened to you, right?"

She nodded. "Mhm! Some meanie hurt me and then I was a ghost and you guys found and fixed me up....is Sun a ghost?"

Moon nodded. "Basically, yeah..."

Instead of sad, however, she still seemed hopeful. "Then you can just fix him like you fixed me, right?"

She moved closer and hugged him. He hugged back, closing his eyes.

"I'm certainly gonna try but...there's no certainty it'll work. Sun might never come home again, Dazzle."

She seemed to understand that a little better.

"Oh..."

She then held up her Sun plushie. "Do you want him, Moonie?"

"Are you sure, Dazzle? Isn't this your favorite toy?"

"It is. But it always makes me feel better when I'm sad, and you're sad too now, so it'll help you feel better too!" She gave him a big smile.

He couldn't help the small half smile of his own as he took and hugged the plushie close. "Thanks, Dazzle." He ruffled her hair a bit before she hugged him again, and he held her.

A few hours (minutes, maybe, he wasn't sure- all he knew is that all the commotion quieted down downstairs by then).

Dazzle had fallen asleep.

Moon carefully tucked her in with another of her toys and stepped out of the room.

Peering over the banister he found Monty, Earth, Solar, Lunar and Jack all huddled up together sleeping, with Molten silently standing over them, watching.

Suddenly he looked up at Moon.

"Are you...ok...Moon?"

"...No, I'm not." He said before disappearing into Sun's room.

Molten followed.

Moon was sitting on the bed, staring at the plushie.

He hadn't registered he was crying until he began to notice dark, wet spots on the doll.

Molten changed his form, carefully coiling around Moon and resting his upper body and head across his lap, wrapped around him like one big hug to comfort him.

"I am...sorry I was not...there to...help you."

Moon sniffled and shook his head.

"I don't think there's anything you could have done, Molten. I barely managed to make it out of there alive myself...only reason Sun didn't is he stayed back to make sure I got out...damn idiot..."

His body began to shake, tears starting to fall down his face as he started to sob, clinging to Molten a bit.

"It's not fair, damn it! Why did he have to go and do something stupid like that for...? He's gone...my twin's gone..."

Moon woke up in the middle of the night one day. He'd been a little restless ever since the incident with Nexus.

But that wasn't what woke him up this time.

He took a minute, upping his audio receptors to make sure he heard what he heard.

He picked up the sound of soft, muffled crying.

He got up and carefully stepped out of his room.

No one in the living room or kitchen or garage. Lunar's basement seemed quiet save for something left playing on the TV.

It was coming from upstairs.

His old daycare attendant code began to kick in as he wondered if it were Dazzle or even Jack having a nightmare.

He slowly, quietly crept up the stairs, tilting his head slightly as he came to the top of the stairs.

Dazzle and Jack's room seemed silent, save for Jack muttering "kill...Ruin...for father..." in his sleep.

That left only one other person.

He made his way to Sun's room, a bit concerned to hear him crying but with everything he's been through since...hell since they came online he isn't surprised.

And with the past few days he's sure he has an idea why.

He stopped at the entrance of his room, turning his receptors back down and peeked in and spoke softly.

"Sun?"

Sun jumped slightly on the bed, reaching up and wiping at his eyes.

"M-Moon? Its late wh-what are you doing up, i-it's like midnight..."

"I couldn't really sleep, and I heard something up here, came to check it out." He half lied.

He didn't want Sun to feel bad for waking him up, even by accident.

Moon came and eased onto the bed next to Sun, watching as he tucked into himself a bit more, his hands tight around his knees, and noticed some faint smudges on his rays.

He reached up to wipe the smudges off.

"You've been pulling on them again...you wanna talk about it?"

Sun tensed slightly at his touch and turned his eyes away. Of course he wouldn't be so open.

He wasn't good at talking about his issues.

Luckily, with some help by hanging out lots with Earth, he didn't need to tell him directly.

Moon scooted a bit closer, placing a hand over Sun's to ease his grip on himself.

"You've been thinking about Nexus still, haven't you?"

The sudden, slight shift, trying to retreat further into himself, and following sniffle told him he was right.

Then Sun began to speak.

"It's just...I tried so hard, y'know? I tried to help him, I did everything I could for him and still he just...it's like no matter what I did for him he just ended up hating me. And yeah everything was fine at first but..."

"I can't help but feel like there was more I could have done for him...like I should have done more."

"And then...for it all to end this way...I killed him, Moon. I didn't want to. I still wanted to try and help him...and instead I killed him."

Sun had moved to sitting next to him, his hands apart and one laced with Moon's, leaned into him with his head on his shoulder.

"It's like no matter what I can't stop killing my family...I killed you, Lunar, and now Nexus..."

Moon looked at him.

"Lunar?"

"If I hadn't yelled at him or been angry or upset I wouldn't have snapped at him and he wouldn't have been alone and-" He stopped and tried to take a deep breath.

"I indirectly killed him. I indirectly killed you too...I didn't want to lose another brother..." Sun turned his face into Moon's shoulder, his body shaking as he started to cry again.

"Every brother I've had has died in some way because of me, Moon...I'm tired of it. I'm tired of everyone around me dying. And I'm tired of it being my fault..."

Moon brought his arms up around him, hugging him close.

"Sun..." He wasn't sure what to say to him, so he opted for holding him, and letting him cry.

"I'm so tired, Moon...everything this happens I hear everything, I see everything...I keep hearing Nexus screaming, I keep seeing him burn...hell I've started hearing Eclipse and Bloodmoon again too..."

Moon glanced at him. He'd known about Bloodmoon, but not Eclipse.

"I...I've been hearing everything from everyone I've killed. Everyone...everyone this body has murdered... even Evelyn...I'm tired, Moon...I'm so tired of it all..."

As Sun spoke between cries his voice got lower, slower, until he was quiet all together.

Moon looked at him, and noticed he had fallen asleep.

Moon sighed softly and cleaned his face, plugged him up to charge and tucked him in, moving into the chair near the door and curled up in it, the music box in his chest slowly coming to life with a soft lullaby.

He wasn't good with emotions or talking about them, but he can still what he can for his brother when he's hurting.