☀️through the years🍃

happy birthday to my favourite garbage man :") 💖

I didn't realize back then. I thought I had all the time in the world to tell you. Every waking moment I spent agonizing over how I would do it. I carved our initials into the bridge assuming that one day I'd get to show you. I spent so many sleepless nights trying to convince myself to tell you, to convince myself that it was a good idea.

When we met again as adults, you reminded me of how much I loved you. Your smile, the annoyed look on your face when I'd make annoying ass jokes, your voice, but most importantly, your laugh. I could listen to that laugh for hours at a time. It made me feel like, despite all of the absolute hell we were dealing with, it made me feel like I was safe.

I lost you that night. I lost you that night, and I will never forgive myself. I could have done something. I don't know what, but I know I could have. If I had just believed a bit harder. If I had attacked a bit better. If I had been a bit stronger. You would still be here with me. I was going to tell you how I felt as soon as we left. But I never got the chance.

I know it's beyond late. I know I've missed my chance. It hurts every time I think about it, and I promise you, it's almost all I think about these days. But I'm going to say what I should have said so many fucking years ago. What I should have said the very first day.

-"How can we go back to being friends...?"-❤️‍🩹 (back to friends - sombr)

Dear Eddie,

I think of you every day, and i want that the time come back, i want stay with you Eddie...

I have to tell you something, anyway you aren't with me today, I loved you from the first to the last moment together.

I live in New York now, yeah this is fantastic, but my life isn't the same without you...

I love you so much Eddie Spaghetti. I will always love you forever.

Thank you Eds. Goodbye.

From your dear Trashmouth.

A letter from Richie written by me:) I'm crying TwT

002/365

✨️The Trashmouth Tour '25✨️