The way I "grew up" it was normal that trans people were not obsessed with each others' AGAB and could relate with each others' trans experiences regardless of what gender we are.
Trans men, trans women, transmasc/fem, all kinds of nonbinary and transneutral people etc. + a good handful of gnc and queer cis people, - we all shared this experience diverging from contemporary gendered expectations.
Trans men/mascs relating to trans women/fems + vice versa was understood as solidarity and an eye-opening moment of seeing how cishetpatriarchy impacts different kinds of trans people.
Nowadays on this hellsite and sadly even in real life (not for me, personally, - but others have faced this) you see people act like it's "disgusting and appropriative" and "making women's issues about disgusting men who have nothing to do with it" when tmascs/men relate with transfem/women.
So tmascs/men are this group that you don't even view as other trans people. Whose existence and presence are an insult to you, whose lived experiences are apparently take something away from you, - because "it centers men". Men this men that, but it's OK if that's a cis man who might've been an egg...
If patriarchy wanted trans men to exist, why does conservative propaganda imagery show cishet couples instead of gay guys with their gay trans husbands?
Why do you think you are being called "male" when transmascs/men talk about the violence and death we face for defying imposed "femaleness" by cishetpatriarchy?
Not a single part of this denies the way transfems+women are oppressed for trans femininity + womanhood. (transmisogyny)
The pericishetpatriarchy does not want intersex, trans, GNC or queer people to exist at all, what do you think this implies?
Historically, "transgender" means anyone who varies from cishet gender norms and who willingly identified with the term.
Transmasc just meant someone who was transgender and whose gender aligned with masculinity, transfem was that but with femininity.
Idk who is the TERF in the room when it's these "trans men relating with trans women are disgusting men who need to shut up" folks are so obsessed with other trans people's AGAB that you don't perceive as anything other than inconvenient pests you can verbally abuse and imagine we share 0 human experiences with you. Let alone trans experiences.
TERF cis lesbian separatists are exactly like you but reverse. They think everyone who was AFAB inherently is more "relatable and trustworthy" + "actually oppressed" than themselves. They think transfems just existing somehow "erase" cis women, which is a pure nonsense claim.
Why do you need this reverse-TERF rhetoric that just harms tmascs/men, to validate your stakes in feminism? You can have the latter without erasing other trans people from our lived experiences.
We don't need our oppressors' tools to explain or validate our experiences as trans people.
Also cis people's gender dynamics are not an identical blueprint to how trans people navigate gender.
"Obsessed with their AGAB" according to transradfems = Trans people describing how transphones weaponize our AGABs against us, to, you know, be able to talk about oppression.
"Obsessed with others' AGAB" the way I use it in this post = People, particularly TERFs and transradfems, acting like they must always know other people's AGAB to determine how "safe / relatable" other people are.
Which is inherently transphobic and reduces people's experiences and humanity to "what genitals I assume people were born with", but yeah sure keep calling me the TERF here.