#tog4

"When I was in Wendlyn. I lied when I said I didn't. From the moment you left, I missed you so much I went out of my mind. I was glad for the excuse to track Lorcan here, just to see you again. And tonight, when he had that knife at your throat . . .

"You make me want to live, Rowan. Not survive; not exist. Live."

Unfortunately, I caught wind of some spoilers- so I had a feeling about some characters living on, etc. But I still feared. I was genuinely shaking and screaming, freaking out.

I thought Aedion was dead for sure. Lysandra showing up made me cry. When the ring got put on Dorian's hand, I cried. Aelin standing up on the steps to lecture Rifthold and announce Dorian as king. Cried.

Chaol in a wheelchair, cried.

"To a new world," the Queen of Terrasen said.

The King of Adarlan lifted his glass, such endless shadows dancing in his eyes, but—there. A glimmer of life. "To freedom."

CRIED. STILL CRYING. AHHHHH.

Aelin coming back for Dorian. Oh my wyrd. Manon giving them hope that he was still in there.. The KING? BEING A VALG DEMON??

ELIDE BEING TASKED BY KALTAIN TO FIND CELAENA??? KALTAIN NEVER KNOWING THAT CELAENA IS AELIN QUEEN OF TERRASEN??? AELIN NEVER GETTING TO SAVE KALTAIN??? UUGHHHHH.

I cannot WAIT for Elide to fucking show up at some awful, tragic moment in time. Where Aelin and her court are in peril, and crippled Elide just shows up like please Queen Aelin! Do you know a Celaena! And just fucking saving the day with this wyrdkey that she has no clue she had the whole time.

And I need Manon and Dorian to be a thing. I am seeing it, sensing it. It is there. Something is there. And Asterin's story has allowed such a thing to happen in Manon's heart. SHE HAS HEART.

Oh my, and I am so thankful that Aelin and Chaol got another chance at a heart to heart. It really hurt how they left off with each other at the start. And I am glad they were able to trust each other again in their own way. And really talk about what happened. I needed that.

Edit: I literally can't stop thinking about it, I had to come back after posting. I went through all my highlights on Goodreads. Like- the found family. The friendship. It is all so beautiful. The relationships between all of them. It actually makes me want to cry. Even when they originally planned to kill Dorian, they weren't giving up on him. They wanted to give him that mercy, and were still coming back for him in a way.

I am sad that they are all splitting up already but whatever. Chaol for sure meets the healer from AB. That fated thread shit that Aelin has been feeling. We needed all these pieces. It is just so refreshing to actually have things feel planned out. I know not a lot of authors get that privilege, to plan so far in advance when they don't even know they will get one book published. But I feel safe. I feel like everything I am reading has purpose, and that even if it hurts along the way- the end will be worth it. And it'll be beautiful.