#tkow

“No.” The sound of her name alone sent flashbacks flickering through this memory. Glimpses of Mexico, the inside of a prison cell, his mother screaming, Bianca crying on the witness stand in a courtroom. There was no way he was letting that woman any chance to get near him or his family ever again.

“She insists she’ll only speak if she can talk to you.” This exactly why he’d left the Bureau in the first place.

“Emily, I’m retired, I’m not an agent anymore and–”

“And there are lives on the line, Spencer. I wouldn’t ask if we had any other choice.” And so he ended class early, hurried out of the lecture hall, and climbed into the waiting SUV. Luke tried to catch him up – that morning Garcia had received a video from a woman with dark hair, showing two huddled, hooded figures tied up on the floor of a warehouse. A woman and a small child. They seemed to be crying and while Garcia couldn’t make out their identity, the woman filming wasn’t trying to hide her face at all. The demand attached said they would be killed if Catherine Adams wasn’t released from prison, and Cat only wanted to talk to him. The only man she’d ever lost to.

“This doesn’t follow her typical M.O.,” Reid said. “She usually goes after men, fathers specifically. Why go after what’s likely a mother and child?” Cat was a creature of habit. Her impulsive nature was her downfall. This didn’t seem like her at all.

Luke shrugged. “You know her better than I do. I’ll have Garcia show you the footage when we get there, maybe you’ll see something we didn’t.” But as soon they arrived at the BAU, Emily ushered him off to an interrogation room. There she sat in an orange jumpsuit, staring at the one-way glass, waiting for him with a Cheshire cat grin. It made his blood boil. Reid inhaled deeply before stepping inside. He stood there staring at her in silence. He didn’t trust himself not to scream.

Cat laughed. “Classic negotiating technique. First one to speak loses, right?” The sound of her voice took him right back to that awful night – leaving Milburn, nearly losing his mother, Bianca crying in the roundtable room. Scratch and the crash and Stephen’s death and everything that had come after.

He wasn’t in the mood for her games. He wasn’t supposed to be here. He should have been finishing his class and going home to pick Eliza up from pre-school. “You arranged the kidnapping of two people and you did it the same way you did it before,” he sighed. Cat immediately launched into her usual banter. She had given up fighting her case, she insisted. Now she just wanted to stave off the boredom by playing with her favorite toy. The only thing she hadn’t done, she claimed, was him.

“You sexually violated me in Mexico,” he reminded her.

“I did? Are you sure?” she asked. He gritted his teeth. “Stop being the boy who cried rape, Spencie, it’s not a good look.”

The room was too small, too warm. He couldn’t bear to be in here with her but he had to be. “I want to go a date,” she declared. “With you.”

“A date?” This was absurd. This was ridiculous. This couldn’t be happening.

“Yes. I want to look pretty. And I want to have fun. And I won’t even get physical, ok?” Cat rolled her eyes. “Unless you want me to.”

There was no way he was going to take Cat Adams on a date. There were only two people he’d ever been on a date with in his life (the ill-fated Redskins game and the Lila Archer incident didn’t count, he’d decided), and he had no desire to add a third to that list. Going out on a date was what he did with Bianca, because he loved her. He took her to bookstores and symphonies and New York City. He bought her flowers and watched her favorite movies and made a list of all her favorite restaurants. That was something special. Something sacred.

“The only date I’ll be there for,” he whispered to Cat, “is the one where they stick a needle in your vein.”

“You’re gonna let a mother and daughter die?” Cat asked. So whoever was in that video Luke mentioned, it was a mother and her child.

“I never said a mother and daughter. You’re already slipping. We’ll find them, we always do.” The team would find them and he could go home and be with the only two people he wanted to sit across a table from.

“Not tonight,” Cat laughed. “Tonight, I win.”

This was a waste of his time. “The score between me and you is two to zero. By tomorrow morning, it’ll be a clean sweep.” He turned to glare at her. “Enjoy eternal nothingness. It’s a metaphor for your life.” It was petty, he knew that, but he couldn’t resist letting the bitterness he felt rising in his throat out in some small way.

Cat snorted. “You don’t even realize you’re already losing.” Before he could ask her what she meant, the interrogation room door opened. Prentiss stood there staring at Cat with an expression of utter horror. That Cheshire cat smirk returned. Reid’s glanced between the two women whose gaze held an unspoken secret he couldn’t make sense of.

“What is it, Emily?” he asked.

“Outside,” the unit chief said.

“I did something bad, Spencie,” Cat sing-songed. His stomach dropped. He was missing something. Cat knew it. Emily knew it. And whatever it was, it was big. Emily grabbed his arm, pulling him out of the room. Cat’s laughter echoed. The blood rushed in his ears. Something was wrong.

“Spencer,” Emily began. She shut the door behind her and placed herself in front of it, blocking his way. “The unsub sent another video to Garcia. The woman removed the hoods from their faces and we’ve been able to identify the two victims in the video.” Two people. A mother and daughter. A mother and daughter. I did something bad, Spencie. You don’t even realize you’re already losing. No. No, he couldn’t go there.

“I’m sorry,” Emily said. She turned over a tablet. The video showed a dusty warehouse with big windows. And even if the two people had been wearing hoods, he would’ve recognized them immediately. If Luke had been able to show him the video in the car, if they’d taken him to the roundtable room first, he would’ve known. That was her favorite cardigan and the dress he’d zipped up for her in their bedroom. And those were the tiny shoes he’d carefully tied while she sat patiently in the carseat. And now, those were the faces of the two people he loved more than anything in this life, staring back at him.

“No.” His voice cracked.

“We don’t know how she got to them, but I promise you we won’t rest until Bianca and Eliza are safe.”

“No.” In her wisdom Prentiss had blocked him from running back into that room and doing something he might regret later. Reid bit down, forcing back every curse he wanted to shout. He turned and stormed down the hall, pushing his way through the glass doors until he came upon Morgan’s empty office. He stepped inside, slamming the door behind him. It was too hot, his clothes were too tight, everything was too overwhelming and he couldn’t think straight. Fingers fumbled with the knot of his tie, only able to loosen it enough to yank it over his head. He undid the first few buttons of his shirt and shook out his arms. Stimming always helped to center him. He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed a hand to his stomach. Breathed in and out. In and out.

She had them. Cat had them.

Reid screamed, a guttural sound that came from his throat of its own accord. He spun around and set eyes on a desk piled high with books and papers and he pushed them all off to the floor. A lamp went with them, which crashed into a water cooler that tumbled over on its side. It wasn’t enough. He screamed again, flipping a table in the center of the room and throwing a book at the wall. “FUCK!” he shouted. “GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!”

It was like his body didn’t know how to handle the rage. He fell to his knees and curled into himself on the floor, sobbing. This was his fault, all his fault. His only job was to keep them safe, and they were in danger now because of him.

....

Their captor lowered the video camera, smirking. “I think that’ll be a nice video to send your husband, won’t it?” Bianca grit her teeth, inhaling through her nose and willing herself to keep it together. She had to stay calm, for Eliza’s sake. Her ribs and shoulder ached, the blows the woman had landed to her jaw stung sharply. She thought distantly of the night she’d punched Spencer on accident on their anniversary, thinking him an intruder. There would be a trail of bruises left behind for days at least.

“Mama are you okay?” Eliza asked.

Her daughter’s voice brought her back to the present. Bianca nodded carefully, the movement painful. She needed to keep Elizabeth calm and keep them both alive. “I’m okay, sweetheart. Everything’s going to be okay.”

“Where’s Daddy?”

“He’ll be here soon, okay? He’s gonna come find us and then we’ll go home.” He would find them. He always would. No matter how far apart they were or how lost they felt, they always found each other. They saved each other, that was what they did. He made sure she ate and protected her from her family and came to find her in the woods. She helped him through grief and stayed with him through withdrawal and guarded his heart from the monsters. He would find her.

The dark-haired woman squatted down on the ground beside them. “It’s cute,” she laughed, a sharp and cold sound. “That you have so much faith in a man. Men are nothing but disappointing.”

Bianca had been let down by men in her life plenty of times. Her father, who she was never good enough for. Her brother, who held the knife against her throat. They were the reason she jumped when doors slammed and flinched when someone yelled and ran far away from her problems. But Hotch and Rossi had welcomed her like a daughter, Morgan had loved her with the playful protectiveness of an older brother, Lorenzo had been a friend when she needed one, and Spencer – Spencer was the opposite of everyone who had ever hurt her.

“What do you want from him?” Bianca asked. “Did he arrest you? Put away someone you love?” The woman – the unsub, Bianca was beginning to think of her as – just glared back. “If this is a trap, he’s not going to walk into it,” she said. “He’s too smart for that. No matter what you have planned, he’ll outsmart you. He always does.”

Her husband, the genius. He’d win. He find them.

“I don’t think he’ll outsmart us,” the unsub said. So there were two of them.

“Really? Because if he finds us, you’ll be outnumbered. Is your partner smart? Or just too cowardly to take him on?” Despite her fear she tried to maintain her best lawyer voice, imagining she was cross-examining a difficult witness on the stand rather than a kidnapper with a gun.

“Cat’s not a coward,” the woman snapped. She froze, realizing her slip.

“Cat? You’re working for Cat Adams?” She should’ve known. Who else hated Spencer more than her? The woman who’d nearly taken his wedding ring, his mother, his life. Cat was the reason he’d been gone during her pregnancy, the reason he’d been traumatized in Milburn, and drugged against his will. And Cat was the reason that her little girl was tied up in this warehouse. Feeling fury burn in her chest, Bianca forced herself to smile through the pain. “Then you’re definitely going to lose. Cat never wins. You’ll see.”

There was a smack, and Bianca could feel the slap across her face before she processed it. She winced, biting her lip to hold back a groan. “Shut up!” the unsub shouted. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.” She turned and stalked off, slamming the door behind her, leaving the two of them alone. Bianca could hear her speaking to someone on the phone.

She leaned down close to Eliza. “Eliza Lou, listen close to me, okay?”

“Okay, mama.”

“Remember how I told you we’re playing a game?” She’d begun this elaborate lie when the unsub grabbed them from the preschool parking lot at gunpoint. It was all a game, and they had to follow all the rules to win. “Well this part of the game is a race. We’re racing to get home. I’m gonna try to untie you, alright? And if I do that, I need you to stay really still and pretend you’re still tied up. But if that woman leaves again, or she’s not paying attention and you can get up without her noticing, I need you to run okay? You get up and you run as fast as you can. You run and run and run until you get outside. And when you do, you go to the first grown up you see, and you tell them my name is Eliza and I’m lost. My dad is Doctor Spencer Reid with the FBI and I need to call him. Do you remember daddy’s phone number?”

Elizabeth recited it perfectly. “Good girl,” Bianca said. “Exactly right. You get them to call daddy, and he’ll come and find you. Okay?”

“What about you, mama?”

“That’s the fun part. We’ll be racing each other home. You and daddy are gonna race me and we’ll see who wins. That’s why you have to be super super fast, okay?”

“Okay!” Eliza smiled up at her, and her heart twisted. She was so young. If they were lucky, she would really think it was all a game – and then she’d forget any of this ever happened. And if they were really lucky, she’d get to see that.

Please, she thought. Please find us, Spencer.

...

He wasn’t sure how long he sat there before the door opened and Tara appeared. She sat down next to him, knowing better than to touch him. “I know this is hard,” she said. “But they need you right now.”

The people he loved harder than he’d ever imagined he could love were in danger. And it was all his fault. Cat did this because he loved them. She was hurting them because he loved them. And unless he played her game, it wasn’t going to stop.

“I. Can’t. Lose them.”

“And you’re not going to,” she said. “We won’t let that happen. We all love them, too, Reid. But we can find them a lot faster if you’re helping us. Okay?”

He tried to focus on the sound of Tara’s voice. Tara, who Bianca had taken a liking to immediately, who had gone with the two of them and Penelope to a Doctor Who convention, who had never been one to throw the word love around lightly. “Okay.” He forced himself to stand and follow her to the roundtable room. “Catch me up,” he insisted.

“I just finished talking with Cat,” Emily said. “She wants to go ice skating so she can, and I quote, skate circles around you. When I told her that wasn’t going to happen, she instructed me to tell Garcia to check her email.”

“Which I am doing now…” Garcia said, typing furiously. “Okay, this just came in.” A video popped up on the screen. A dark haired woman was in the center of the image. “Juliette Weaver, she’s Cat’s old cellmate and she just made parole,” she explained. Even before the video started, Bianca and Elizabeth’s faces were visible. Garcia glanced it him, her kind face pained. “Reid, I’m sorry.” She pressed play.

“Here we go,” Juliette said.

“Mama, what’s happening?”

“It’s okay, sweetheart. It’s just a game. Everything’s okay.” Bianca was trying so hard to keep her voice even.

“It’s not a good idea for parents to lie to their children.” Juliette walked over to Bianca, whose hands and feet were bound. The woman aimed a swift kick to her ribs. Bianca’s yelp physically hurt him to hear.

“Eliza, close your eyes. Close your eyes, sweetie!” The little girl did as she was told just in time to avoid seeing her mother take a punch that knocked her over. They all heard the sound of flesh hitting flesh several times, and Bianca’s muffled cries. And then there was a gun in Juliette’s hand.

“No, no, no,” whispered Garcia, turning away from the screen.

“Don’t do this,” Bianca said.

But the gun went off anyways.

“NO!” he screamed. Reid felt his knees give way at the sound of the gun and Bianca’s screams as every face in the room froze in horror.

But then Bianca kept screaming. And then the scream turned to a gasp.

“Mama!”

“It’s okay, I’m okay, everything’s okay.” The video abruptly cut off.

“Blanks,” Luke said, putting his hand on Reid’s shoulder. “She fired blanks.” He could feel the air returns to his lungs. Bianca was still alive – for now. But that video was a clear warning. If he wanted to keep them both alive, he had to do what Cat wanted.

“You realize what we have to do, don’t you?” Rossi asked. Reid looked away, the fury building inside of him once more.“It’s the only way to get her to slip up. We have to give her what she wants.”

It was hard to breathe this close to her, with his thoughts moving too fast and the memories of Mexico, of Milburn coming too quickly. He had to stay calm. He had to play this game. It was the only way to keep Bianca and Elizabeth safe. He was doing this for them. He just had to think of them.

Cat pushed him away suddenly, and the next thing he knew she’d slapped him hard enough to knock him off balance. She skated away and he scrambled off the floor. “Cat, wait! Cat. Cat, wait. Cat!”

“I have spent my entire adult life reading men. I know when they’re thinking about someone else,” she spat. And of course he was. Of course his mind was on his daughter, on his wife, on the two people he would have gone to the ends of the earth for. The only two people who could have compelled him to go on this stupid sham of a date in this godforsaken roller rink. “Do you know what this was for me? I didn’t ask for one last family visit or final meal. I wanted this. And you can’t even give me the courtesy of your undivided attention. So thanks, but this date is over. You can turn off the stupid lights, boys!” she shouted.

“She’s not you,” he blurted out. Cat turned to glare at him. “Ever since you came into my life, it’s like I can’t get you out of my head. There’s some part of my brain, some part that you inhabit and no matter how good or – or kind or attractive my wife is… she’s not you.” And the words weren’t necessarily lies. There had been a time when he couldn’t get Cat out of his head, but because he was haunted by her – not attracted to her. And Bianca wasn’t her, wasn’t anything like the woman who had tried to tear him apart.

“Do you think about me when you fuck her?” Cat asked.

Lie. Lie and make it good. For the first time in a long time he thought of Maeve. Thought of Diane and the warehouse and how he hadn’t been convincing enough to save someone he loved that night. He wasn’t going to lose this time. He looked to the side, hoping the heat rising to his face would look like an embarrassed blush.

Cat laughed, and to his relief it was a laugh of delight. “Oh come on, Spencie. I’m gonna need you to elaborate on that for me.”

He closed his eyes so his microexpressions wouldn’t betray him. “I try not to. But it’s like I can’t help it. She just… doesn’t do it for me anymore. Not like you. And I know she wouldn’t be able to handle the things I – the things I want to do with you.” God, he was going to be sick.

But Cat was threading her arm around his. “If I’m a homewrecker, I want to make it official. Take me home, loverboy.”

Against all his better judgment, he agreed. Cat already knew their address he presumed, given that she’d had Lindsey bring his mother by the day they’d abducted her. They stood on the front porch of the little blue house as Spencer fumbled with the key in the lock.

“Wait,” Cat said, putting her hand on his. “Did you really mean what you said back there?”

“Yes,” he answered immediately. He could feel the questioning stares of Luke and every SWAT agent.

“Prove it,” Cat said. “And make it good. Because I’m this close to letting them die.”

Reid stared at those cold, dark eyes. He had to make her believe it. He had to betray Bianca in order to save her and their daughter. Just pretend it’s her. He cupped Cat’s the face the way he had done to Bianca a million times, closed his eyes and pressed his mouth to hers. It’s Bianca, he told himself. It’s Bianca. He kissed her furiously, the way he did sometimes after they’d spent too much time apart, or she was blushing in that adorable way, or she was begging him for a distraction. The illusion was a fragile one. Anger could be mistaken for passion though, and he was so angry in that moment. He grabbed at her hair tighter, he pressed the weight of his body against her, he sucked harder at her lip. He tried to believe it, but the hand on his cheek was too warm and the hair between his fingers was too long and the tongue forcing its way into his mouth wasn’t hers.

Just when he thought he couldn’t do it any longer, Cat pulled away. He wanted to vomit, but he forced himself to swallow back the bile rising in his throat. He had to make her believe it.

It was only then that he opened his eyes and realized she wasn’t looking at him anymore. She’d opened the door, and he followed her gaze to where Bianca stood in the living room, her mouth hanging open as she stared at them.

His heart plummeted.

He yanked his hand away from Cat as Bianca wrapped her arms around herself, a look of unmistakable hurt plain on her face.

“B, what are you doing here?” he gasped, crossing the room towards her. She clutched her phone in her hand. There was a pattern of bruises, dirt, scratches across her face. A burn visible on her collarbone that he presumed was from the blank that had been fired. He ached to hold her, but she took a step back when he approached.

“Where is she, Spencer? Where’s Elizabeth?” Bianca demanded.

“Get Cat out of here,” Luke shouted at the SWAT team.

“No, no! She’s the only one who knows where my daughter is!” Bianca cried. “Cat doesn’t go anywhere until I know where she is!”

Cat sauntered into the living room, a triumphant smirk on her face. “Well look at that. You’re not as boring as I thought. You’re plucky. Did it make you mad that I was kissing your husband?”

“No.”

Cat pouted. “Why not?”

“Because there are other things on my mind. Where is she?” Bianca demanded. “Where’s Eliza, where’s my daughter?”

“You’re always so serious,” Cat groaned. “Tonight’s supposed to be fun. Like all the games Spencie and I play together.”

“You think this is a game?” Bianca said. “You kidnapped my daughter!”

“The daughter you didn’t even want.”

“What?” Bianca’s eyebrows, knit together in anger, raised slightly as her rage gave way to confusion.

“Oh please.” Cat rolled her eyes, taking a seat in the armchair. “I got the transcript of the arraignment. You’d be surprised how easy it is to bribe prison guards. You didn’t want to be a mother. But boy genius here got you knocked up. I mean, you really think he’d know to wrap it before you tap it.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t I? He wanted to be a dad, and now here you are. Really I’m doing you a favor. You see, he’s got everyone fooled. Everyone things Dr. Spencer Reid is this nice, innocent, bookish genius who always saves the day – and has zero mommy issues, right? But he’s not. You know he said he thinks about me when he’s fucking you,” she laughed. Bianca recoiled at the words. “Does he ever get rough with you in the bedroom?”

Her face went red. “He’s never hurt me.”

“But that’s not entirely true is it? You said it yourself. He almost died in front of you. He chose drugs over you. He’s hurt you before. Maybe it didn’t leave a mark, but he’s hurt you. Maybe you know the real Spencer Reid. Just like I do.”

He bristled as she sat there in their chair, in their home, talking as if she owned the place. She didn’t belong here. She didn’t know anything about them. “Who’s the real me, Cat?” he asked.

Cat shifted her gaze to him. “The real Spencer Reid throws women against walls and hisses that he’s going to kill them. Even though you knew I was pregnant. You still hurt me.” She turned back to Bianca. “That’s right – while you painting a nursery and picking out baby names, he was throwing me against a wall and choking me. And the next day I miscarried.”

Bianca turned to look at him. The anger in his chest turned to lead, the weight of her words slamming down on him. “No. No that can’t be right. That’s not true.”

“It’s the truth,” she hissed. “Check my medical records. He might pretend to be a doting father, but he fawned over your little bundle of joy after killing my baby. He’s a murderer. Really no different from me. Or from that brother of yours.” Cat laughed sharply. “Oh, yeah. I did my research. Now that had to be fun to unpack in therapy. But it turns out all men are the same, aren’t they?”

“Bianca, I-”

“You were supposed to be different,” she said, cutting him off. She stared down at the floor of their living room. He was hurting her. He was hurting her right now. He fell back onto the couch in the living room, too tired to stay upright. “But you’re just like them. Like my father. Like Rick. Like Franklin.”

Franklin? The third name didn’t make sense. But Reid was too overwhelmed by her words to pay it much attention. She said it with such disgust and he couldn’t deny the guilt that was threatening to crush him. He wanted to sink into the floor. Had he really done that? JJ had tried to stop him but he hadn’t listened. Oh god what had he done?

“Let’s make a deal,” Cat said, grabbing the phone from Bianca’s hands. “I’ll tell you where your kid is. If you tell him exactly what you really think about him.”

Bianca closed her eyes. He could see her hands shaking. “I hate you. You’re just as bad as the others. But you hurt me. You hurt me so many times and you don’t even see it. And it doesn’t matter what I say or how much I yell at you, you’ll never see it.” He couldn’t breathe. What was happening? Where was any of this coming from? She’d only ever once spoken to him like that before. “My truth I will keep, I will not lie. You should have stayed at Milburn. It’s where you belong. Because you’re no different from any of the people you put away. You don’t deserve to be here.” She turned to stare at him. There were tears in her eyes.

And if he hadn’t known better, he would’ve assumed they meant hatred. But she’d given him a clue. My truth I will keep, I will not lie. That’s where Franklin came from. It was a line from “The Franklin’s Tale,” her favorite part of The Canterbury Tales. She’d told his mother that the day she first met Diana. It was a story she saw the two of them reflected in. Arveragus and Dorigen had a pure love based on equality and mutual respect, and when Aurelius tried to split them up, the strength of their love and their willingness to sacrifice for each other kept them together.

Bianca was trying to tell him that it was all an act. That whatever Cat was trying to do to split them up, it wasn’t going to work. Reid had to bite down on his lip to keep himself from smiling. That was his girl. His brilliant, incredible wife. He was so proud of her.

But he had to play along. “Bianca, please.”

“No. No more. I’m glad you found Cat. You two deserve each other.” She turned to Cat. “Now tell me where my daughter is, please. So I can get far away from him.” Cat typed something into the phone and handed it back. “There you go. Baby girl is alive and well. You’re welcome.”

Bianca turned on her heel and ran out to the team, leaving him stranded as he sat on the couch, staring straight ahead. Playing the part he needed play. “I win,” Cat declared. There was chaos around him as the SWAT team handcuffed Cat and Luke took off in a car with Bianca. He was loaded into the truck to sit beside Cat for the long ride back to the prison. The silence gave Cat’s words plenty of time to sink in. Regardless of Bianca’s reaction, there was a truth to what Cat had said. He’d hurt the woman he loved, and he’d done it more than once. He’d hurt so many people. And he’d caused Cat to miscarry.

He disgusted himself. It was all he could do to keep it together as Cat explained she’d just wanted to see him one last time – to make sure he wouldn’t forget about her.

She was hurting too. And maybe even scared. Her voice shook as she said, “Bye, Spencie. I really enjoyed our date.”

And then the guards were taking her away. And then Garcia and Simmons were there. “We heard you might need a ride,” Matt said. “We got Eliza. They’re both safe. We can take you to them if you want.”

“Yes. Yes, please.”

.....

He couldn’t get into that SUV fast enough. He clambered into the passenger seat, heaving a sigh.

“Rough night, huh?” Matt said, as they pulled onto the highway. Reid just shook his head.

“I thought that might be the case,” Garcia said. “Hey, boy genius. I know that you had to say some super yucky things tonight, but we briefed Bianca on it all before you went inside.”

“What? How?”

“Well, Cat had Juliette drop Bianca in the street. Cat wanted us to find her so you three could battle it out at home. The whole showdown was orchestrated – I’ll explain all the details later but to make a long story short, we figured out her endgame pretty fast. So we picked up my favorite petite poet the moment we got her location, hooked her up with a wire, took her back to your place, and told her to follow Cat’s lead and just lie as much as she had to. She would’ve made Meryl Streep proud with that performance! And then the moment Cat sent that text, we were able to swoop in and rescue little Eliza Lou from the clutches of the big bad wolf.”

“Thank you for doing all of that,” he said. “But I’m still feeling pretty horrible at the moment.”

“Is this about the miscarriage?” Garcia asked. “Because I can help you with that, too. “Cat said check the medical record and I did. She had a miscarriage, but it was months later. It had nothing to do with you. It was just a lie to throw you off. The whole team knows that, and so does Bianca.” She reached out from the backseat to put a hand on his shoulder. “You’re not a monster, no matter how badly she wants you to believe that.”

With that information, Reid’s heart lifted ever so slightly. It wasn’t true. And while it would take a while to shake this terrible feeling after everything he’d heard and said, that much was a relief. And most importantly, Bianca and Elizabeth were safe. That was all that really mattered. The day had ended with the two people he loved most alive and well. Everybody lived this time.

They arrived at the hospital and the three of them walked through the maze of corridors together trying to follow the instructions of the front-desk person. He’d left his phone back at the house so Garcia was frantically trying to text Bianca for her location. Just when he was about to declare that they were hopelessly lost, a door opened and he spotted a familiar face.

“Maybe we should go back?” Simmons asked.

“Oh wait! This should be the right hallway,” Garcia said. “Just one door on the left and Bianca should be there, and we can put this whole day behind us. No more lies or games!”

But he didn’t hear them. Because Bianca was walking towards him with the most perfect smile on her face. Her cardigan hanging loosely from her shoulders, bandages and sutures on her skin and a hospital bracelet on her wrist.

“I don’t know,” Simmons said. “I mean, that kiss – that kind of thing seems hard to fake.”

“Oh Matt,” Garcia sighed. “You haven’t seen them together enough. Watch and learn.”

Reid ran to Bianca and wrapped her in a gentle hug. “Thank god you’re okay. Where’s Eliza?”

“The doctors are talking with her to make sure she feels safe at home before we can see her. But she’s okay. We both are,” Bianca said, “thanks to you.

“You were only in danger because of me. I’m so sorry.”

Bianca held him tight. “This was Cat’s fault. Nobody else’s. And it’s over now. We’re safe.” And so they were. She gazed up at him and those brown eyes were so warm. So inviting. He raised a hand to tilt her chin towards him and then shifted to caress her cheek. A smile spread across her face and she closed her eyes as he leaned in to kiss her. Slow at first, as he tested the boundaries, worried about the bruises she bore. But she pulled grabbed his suit jacket and pulled him closer, so he deepened the kiss, savoring the taste of her lips and the sensation of her fingernails at the nape of his neck. She was still too far away, so he shifted his hands to her waist, carefully avoiding the places he knew she’d been kicked, and lifted her up, holding her against him as he spun her around, never once moving his lips from hers.

He kissed her with a passion typically reserved only for their bed or the sofa or up against the wall of the study late at night, kissed her like he couldn’t get enough of her. He didn’t care who saw them. She was safe. She was alive. He loved her, and he wanted the whole world to know that.

When they finally needed to breathe and she pulled away, he set her back on the ground only to pull her back into a hug, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I love you so much,” he murmured.

“I love you, too.”

At the end of the corridor, a dumbfounded Matt raised his eyebrows. “I see what you mean now.”

“Mr. and Mrs. Reid?” a nurse asked, poking his head into the hall. They both turned around. “You can come in now, we’ve finished talking with her. You’re all clear.” The relief on their faces were twin expressions as they dashed into the room together.

Elizabeth looked so small in the big ER bed and a hospital gown far too big for her, but she wore a huge smile. “Daddy, you’re here!” she said.

Reid hurried to her bedside, enveloping her in a hug. “I’m here. I’m right here.” He needed tangible proof that she was alright and to hold her in his arms seemed the simplest thing. His child was safe and sound, back with them where she belonged.

Bianca sat down on the bed and the little girl curled into her mother’s side while holding tight to her father’s hand. “You were so brave today, dear heart,” she said, stroking Eliza’s hair. “I’m so proud of you.”

Eliza looked up at her with wide brown eyes that mirrored her own. “I didn’t like the game,” she said. “Not fun.”

“We won’t play it ever again,” Reid promised her. There were no more games to win, no more villains to best. The doctor came in to assure them that they’d run a full exam on Elizabeth and had found nothing wrong. Juliette hadn’t hurt her. Bianca was given instructions to follow up if had any prolonged pain and then the three of them were on their way home. Garcia and Simmons gave them a ride back to their house, where Luke had driven Bianca’s car back to. By the time they arrived, Elizabeth was fast asleep.

They carried her into the blue house and up the stairs, tucking her carefully into bed and turning on her nightlight. Reid and Bianca hovered in the doorway just a moment longer, needing that extra space to remind themselves that their daughter was okay. They tiptoed downstairs where Bianca put a hot kettle on the stove for two cups of tea.

“You know,” Reid said, “I think Cat Adams was right about one thing.”

“What’s that?” Bianca asked.

“In twenty years, I won’t remember her name.” He stepped closer to her, lacing his fingers through her own. “But it won’t be because of Alzheimer’s. It’ll be because she won’t be worth remembering. I’ll have too many other memories – memories of vacations we took together and Eliza Lou’s birthdays and all of our anniversaries. Our life together. Our little girl. Cat won’t be anything but a blip on the radar. Hardly even a footnote in our story.”

“It’s finally over?”

“It’s over,” he assured her. “We don’t ever have to worry about her again.”

She smiled. “I’m sorry for everything I had to say tonight. I didn’t mean a word of it.”

“I know,” he said. “I picked up on that clue about the Franklin’s Tale. You were brilliant in there. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”

The tea kettle began to whistle as she wrapped her arms around him. “It’s okay. We’re safe. We’re home. And we’re together.”

As they drive to Garcia’s apartment, all his doubts that this might be a mistake are erased because she’s laughing with him and it all does feel so easy. They arrive at the party where she is almost instantly accosted first by Garcia and then by Morgan who have a million questions to ask her.

“So that’s Bianca, right?” Alex asks. Her sudden presence startles him briefly, but he quickly settles. Blake has always soothed him for reasons he can’t quite put a name to.

“Yes,” Reid says, smiling as he watches her talking to Garcia. The evening light shines in her eyes and the faintest blush colors her cheeks and she’s so lovely. When he turns to Blake, the smirk playing at the corner of her mouth makes it clear that he wears that thought plainly on his features. He’s been falling for her all this time, and he can’t deny it any longer, though he can’t bear to admit it to her yet. Still, when she returns to his side, he feels more at ease even surrounded by the people he knows best in this world.

She stands a little too close to him as they look up at the quickly darkening twilight, the earliest stars blinking into view. “It’s a shame everything changes at night, when most of the world is asleep,” she says. “The calendar turns over and the days start getting shorter and we won’t even be awake to witness it.” She sighs and takes a sip of the cocktail in her hand and he lets his elbow brush against hers for just a moment. “Everything changes so fast. You wake up, and the world is different.”

There is a strange longing in her voice. It pulls on his heartstrings because he feels it too, this yearning from something slipping past his fingers. He’s so afraid that it’s all changing so suddenly and he can’t seem to hold on tight enough. He can’t hold everything, after all. Reaching out to her means letting to of Maeve, but holding fast to Maeve means losing Bianca. He can’t have it all. But she looks at him and that red dress and those freckles across her nose pull him in and he knows that if he lets her slip away he’ll regret it for the rest of his life.

“I think about it too sometimes,” he admits. “Maybe everything does change. A lot has changed this year. But there are some things that stay the same. Garcia is always going to throw the best parties. Gravity will always remain constant. The Bureau is never going to give us enough time off. Night changes into day so fast. But it doesn’t scare me so much anymore. I’m still going to be me. And you’re still going to be you. And if there’s anything I’ve learned through all these changes it’s that I’m always going to be grateful that you’re in my life.” Reid tries to take a steady breath in, to make the words sound casual without glossing over them. “I’m always going to care about you. And I’m always going to want you around. That’s never going to change.”

Bianca stares at him and he doesn’t dare move under her gaze lest a single microexpression give him away. Then she smiles. “I’m glad you’re in my life, too,” she tells him. “You’re one of my favorite people on the planet. And that’s never going to change. We’re never going to change.” It’s a declaration if he’s ever heard one. A promise that allows him to cling to just the tiniest bit of hope, however irrational he knows it to be, that maybe she understands just what he means when he says he cares about her. And maybe she feels the same way.

He lifted Elizabeth up into his arms. “Why do you have hair Uncle Derek?” she asked, pointing to Morgan’s head.

“Because zombie Michael Jackson has hair in the “Thriller” music video,” he replied, as though that context meant anything to a five year old. “And that’s who I’m dressed as for Halloween.”

“You look funny with hair,” the little girl replied.

Morgan put his free hand over his chest, and feigned melodramatic offense. “Oh, ouch! You wound me, Eliza Lou!” Eliza giggled as her godfather set her back on the ground. “Now what exactly are you two supposed to be?” he asked, gesturing between Spencer and Bianca.

Spencer wore a red zippered sweater with a tie and blue Converse, while Bianca had on a floral pink 70’s style prairie dress. “It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood,” Spencer replied.

When Morgan just raised an eyebrow, Bianca said, “Mr. Rogers and Lady Aberlin, from Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood!”

“You see,” Reid explained, “Elizabeth had her heart set on being a tiger, so we tried to come up with costumes that could go along with it. And Fred Rogers used a number of puppets on Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood to help act out situations of learning and vulnerability in healthy ways, one of which was Daniel Striped Tiger who was the most recognizable from the show. It’s actually funny, the tiger puppet was a gift to Mr. Rogers the night before the very first episode was s-”

“I get it,” Morgan said, holding up a hand. “I’ll read the Wikipedia article later, I promise.”

“Oh come on now, babe, I think it’s cute.” Savannah appeared beside her husband, linking her arm with his. “It’s good to see you two.” She still wore nurse’s scrubs and had a stethoscope around her neck.

“Did you just come from work?” Bianca asked. Savannah and Morgan’s daughter, Ainslie, had just turned one and Savannah had gone back to full-time shifts at the hospital.

Savannah laughed, shaking her head. “Thank god, no. Hank wanted to be a zombie, so Derek came up with the idea of going as “Thriller” MJ to match. I figured if it’s the zombie apocalypse in our household, I might as well be the nurse on the frontlines trying to fight them off.”

“Uh oh,” Morgan said. “I don’t know how long you’ll last out there. The zombies are pretty handsome, I hear.” He kissed her cheek as she rolled her eyes. Turning back to the Reids, he asked, “So are we ready to take on trick or treating?”

Bianca winked. “Well Spencer here was born ready, and I think that after seven Halloweens together I’ve learned a thing or two.” The four of them had been chosen as the designated chaperones for the kid’s festivities while the rest of the adults finished up a Halloween feast at the house. Once all the kids were accounted for and everyone had a pillowcase in hand, they set out into the DC streets in search of spooks and sweets.

Spencer’s boundless enthusiasm was contagious, spreading even to Jack who seemed torn between being excited about Halloween and trying to look cool in front of Mabel. But once it became clear Mabel was into the scary stories Spencer told while they walked, Hotch’s son visibly relaxed. It was a good group of kids – at every house Henry, Jack, and Mabel made sure that Michael, Hank, and Eliza got candy first, and a chorus of thank you!s followed them from doorstep to doorstep.

Spencer’s delight for the present was carrying over to the future. “When she’s a little older,” he was saying, “we can go to a haunted house or two. Maybe even a haunted corn maze. And we can watch a midnight scary movie screening and she’ll be able to carve her own pumpkins!” Bianca laughed and he glanced her way, bashful. “What?”

“I just love seeing you excited about this,” she said. His eyes always lit up in a way that made her heart skip a beat after all this time. “And thinking about all the holidays we’re going to have together and how we’ll get to make all these new traditions as she grows up.”

Spencer stopped suddenly on the sidewalk and before she could react he was hugging her close. The fabric of his sweater was soft against her cheek. “What was that for?” she asked him, looking up, her arms still wrapped around his waist.

“I wouldn’t be doing any of this without you,” he said. “I would probably still be at the BAU. I wouldn’t have anything worth leaving for. I wouldn’t have someone I get excited about growing old with. But I have a home because I have you. I have a home and someone who will plan obscure Halloween costumes with me and I have a daughter and it’s all because I fell in love with you. Because you loved me.”

“And because you loved me,” she echoed. She wouldn’t have wanted it with anyone else. He was the only person who made her feel safe enough to trust him with every part of her. He made her feel brave enough to take on the world and to start a family. When nothing else made sense, he was there to anchor her with a warm embrace and all the words she needed to hear and promises to stay. He knew her better than she knew herself. Bianca stood on her toes to kiss him sweetly, not caring that there were people all around them.

“When you two are done being all lovey-dovey,” Morgan called, “we’ve still got one more block to hit.”

“Lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey!” Eliza sang, skipping beside them. Spencer smiled and kissed Bianca’s forehead as he interlaced his fingers through hers with one hand and reached down to hold their daughter’s hand with the other. When the final houses had been visited, they descended upon the LaMontagne-Jareau household once more, with pillowcases full of candy.

During their absence, more familiar faces had appeared at the house. Prentiss and Mendoza were drinking wine with Rossi in the living room and Luke, dressed as Mario, had his arm around Penelope while they talked with three of the newer BAU members.

“Aunt Alex!” Eliza’s bag of candy was temporarily forgotten as she ran to hug Alex Blake who was at the kitchen table with JJ, Will, and her husband James.

“Why Elizabeth,” she said, “aren’t you the most ferocious tiger I’ve ever seen?”

“I’ve been practicing!” Eliza replied. She furrowed her eyebrows and held her hands up by her face like claws. “Rarr!” Her godmother gave her around of applause for her performance, happily doting on her while everyone gathered around the table for dinner.

It was warm and inviting in the living room, feeling every bit like a cheerful Thanksgiving dinner except for the costumes and the spooky decorations. There was plenty to be discussed, whether it was Emily’s new position as Director of the Bureau or the book Rossi and Matt had just published. The Simmons clan were the only ones absent, their children having made plans already to spend Halloween with their friends in their own neighborhood. Bianca felt right at home among the people who had come to feel as much her family as they were Spencer’s. She swapped stories of international travels with Alex and James and was delighted to talk to Tara and her girlfriend, Elena. The two women were dressed as Cinderella and Prince Charming, and she had to admit that Tara could certainly pull off a suit. When Penelope begged Morgan for a chance to babysit Hank and Ainslie soon and Rossi said, “You know you could just have some of your own,” she and Luke both turned red.

“Hey now,” Luke said. “We’re just trying to get through the wedding first, okay?”

“Yeah, you never know, I could still change my mind,” Garcia teased, elbowing her fiancé.

“You say that at least once a month,” Luke laughed. “But I don’t think we can get our deposit back on the venue at this point, so it looks like you’re stuck with me.”

There was enough food and to go around, and a generous amount of libations courtesy of David Rossi. Bianca’s contribution was an array of desserts – pumpkin cheesecake, salted caramel brownies, and chocolate cupcakes with vampire fangs and raspberry filling – that were immediate hits, and Spencer’s contribution was agreeing not to consume them before the party. After dinner the kids went down to the basement to watch Hocus Pocus, Jack and Henry promising they’d look after everyone, while the adults settled into the living room.

“Eliza,” Bianca called. “How about you pick out a few pieces of candy for now, and we’ll keep the rest up here so you can have some later, okay?” The little girl was about to follow her cousins downstairs with her whole bag of sugary treasures. “If you eat too much candy at once you’ll get a bellyache.”

Eliza considered this, then nodded. “Okay, mama.” She dug through the pillowcase, choosing a few treats, then handed the bag back to her mother asking, “But how come daddy gets to?” She pointed to Spencer who sat on the floor of the living room, gorging himself on a plate of sweets. He looked up sheepishly, caught red-handed about to take a bite of oversized brownie.

“It’s because I’m old enough to anticipate the consequences of my actions,” he said. “I know when to stop before I feel sick.”

“You go have fun with your cousins, okay?” Bianca said, giving her daughter a quick hug before watching the tail of the tiger costume vanish the stairs. She sat down next to Spencer, shaking her head. “You’re such a bad liar,” she laughed. “You’ll be complaining all night that you feel awful.”

He shrugged. “What can I say? I just can’t help myself around something sweet.” Spencer put his arms around her waist and pulled her into his lap, leaning in to kiss her. “See?”

She smiled. “You’re lucky, Mr. Rogers, that I like you just the way you are. Insatiable sweet tooth and all.”

Spencer grinned. “It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood.” Mimicking the song from the old children’s show, he sang, “Would you be mine? Could you be mine?”

“I bet if I hugged one it would be so fluffy,” Eliza says, and as she turns to show her father just how she would hug a cloud, her eyes go wide at the sight of the woman. “Mama!” she shouts, scrambling to her feet and running across the grass. Reid sits up, a grin spreading across his face at the sight of Bianca. She kneels down to meet Eliza, catching her in a hug and lifting her up into her arms.

“Eliza Lou, I missed you,” she says, kissing the girl on the forehead.

“No, I missed you,” Eliza counters, throwing her arms around her mother’s neck. Then she gasps, having remembered the important lesson she’s been learning. “Daddy’s teaching me about the sky,” she says, the word heavy with reverence.

“The sky? Wow. That sounds exciting!” Bianca carries her back over to the spot where Reid is, and she sits down beside them. Eliza quickly stands once more to chase a grasshopper, and he takes the opportunity to lean in and kiss his wife.

“I thought you wouldn’t be home until later,” he murmurs. Not that he’s complaining. Since retiring from the BAU, he’s had to adjust to being the one who waits at home when long cases or the occasional international trip steals her away. Reid is happy of course to see her doing the thing she loves, but he’s just as happy to have her by his side.

“Court finished early. The defense agreed to the settlement, so I thought I’d come home.”

“Congratulations,” he says. Then, doing the math he asks, “How long were standing there?”

“Just a few minutes,” she assures him. “I came outback to find you and you just looked so peaceful, the two of you lying there together looking at clouds. I didn’t want that moment to end.” She kisses him once more, and he can feel her smile against his lips. He reaches up with one hand to caress her cheek, the other hand at her waist to pull her closer to him, but before he can lose himself in the feeling –

“Mama!” They pull away from each other in time for Eliza to come running back into Bianca’s lap. “I couldn’t catch the grasshopper,” she pants. “It was too faster than me.”

“Is that right?” Bianca asks. “Well, maybe Mr. Grasshopper had to go home to his mama and daddy for dinner. After all, it’s almost time for you to eat dinner, isn’t it?” Reid finds it hard to think back to a time when Bianca was so afraid of becoming a parent. Mothering seems to come easy to her. She always has the right thing to say to their daughter when she needs it most, and even when she’s away for work makes a point of finding ways to keep Eliza smiling.

Eliza shakes her head. “No, I’m not hungry. I’m tired,” she adds dramatically, falling against Bianca’s chest. Bianca laughs, and wraps her arms around her to keep her from falling. She lies back in the grass, and Reid does the same. He wraps an arm around Bianca’s shoulders and she inches closer to rest her head on his chest, Eliza nestled between them. It’s so soothing to listen to the pattern of their breathing as they rest together. Eliza Lou has worn herself out from running around all day, and Bianca has just closed a major court case which she’s been burnt out on for weeks. For so long, she was his safe harbor to return to after hard cases, and it feels like such a gift to be that for her now. He doesn’t have to worry about fighting monsters or being a hero. He can come home from the classes he teaches and just be a dad. He can just be a husband.

There are moments he thinks he misses the excitement – the thrill of the chase, the high of solving the puzzle, the electric atmosphere that working in a team provides. But then there are moments like these, with both of his girls in his arms and the golden evening light illuminating the grass. Moments where it is so easy to turn his head and place a kiss on his wife’s bare shoulder as he does now. Where he looks at the little girl between them who has his unruly hair and her mother’s warm brown eyes. And Reid knows without a doubt that he doesn’t miss a thing. His whole world is right there.

Putting an unsub away doesn’t make him feel as safe as when Bianca hugs him tight. Finding an essential aspect of the profile doesn’t make him feel as proud as when Eliza calls, “Daddy!” with a grin on her face. He used to think that the only thing he was meant to do with his life was solve mysteries. And now, there are times he can’t help but wonder if this is what he was meant to do, and everything else was just a means to this end, in this place. With his family.

He would live it all again if he had to. The grief and the ghosts and the relapses and the loneliness. He would take it all for this joy, this immense love. Reid doesn’t even think he has words for it. He doesn’t know how to communicate how happy he is, how thankful he is to have this life with these two people in it. So he just squeezes Bianca’s shoulder a little tighter.

She looks up at him and whatever he feels must be written plainly on his face because she stares at him for a heartbeat and then smiles so softly before nuzzling her head against his chest. Eliza shifts between them, her tiny hand grabbing at his shirt.

Their guests begin to arrive and the house is full of deep laughter and bursting with conversation and the smell of warm food. Rossi is thrilled to have another Italiano at the table when he meets Lorenzo and naturally he and Eva hit it off immediatey. Jess and Ivy read a recognition of the native tribes whose land the house sits on before they eat, and they’re both immediately bombarded with compliments and questions from Garcia who is in awe of Ivy’s technicolor hair. It’s so cozy, and Bianca feels so grateful for these people and this home. She always dreaded the holidays growing up – feeling trapped in a place that wasn’t safe or passing the days alone when her friends fled home to be with their own families. Spencer changed that for her. His love for the holidays was infectious and he’s given her a million reasons to love the festivities – most of all, he’s given her a home. A family. People to celebrate with, people who make all the days feel special and worthy of a grand celebration.

The conversation falters only when the meal begins. “You made this?” Luke gasps, after a bite of risotto.

“I did,” Bianca confirms. There are chuckles from around the table – almost everyone else has had the opportunity to be on the receiving end of her culinary skills before, and Luke’s shock is a common reaction.

“Oh my god. It’s incredible. You know, if things don’t work out with you and Reid,” he teases, “I would marry you in a heartbeat if it meant eating like this every day.”

“You’ll have to get in line newbie,” Garcia says. “But I don’t think Reid’s going to give her up that easily.” None of them have forgotten the Thanksgiving at Rossi’s – she’d spent hours cooking an impressive feast with Dave, and Spencer had stuffed himself silly attempting to try one of every dessert she’d made, only to spend the rest of the evening curled up on the couch complaining of a stomachache. “

Spencer sets down the spoon he’s been using to feed Eliza and leans in to wrap his arms around Bianca, pulling her close to his chest and rests his chin on the top of her head. He looks at Luke and his smile melts into a poker-straight face. “You know contrary to what people might say, I’ve had a perfect score on every firearms qualifications since 2013.”

“I was kidding!” Luke says, throwing his hands up in surrender, resulting in more laughter. Elizabeth begins to fuss and Spencer gently lifts her out of her highchair to let Bianca hold her. She gently bounces their daughter in her arms and her cries fade to quiet babbling. Pressing a kiss to her head, Bianca knows that this is what she’s most thankful for. For their daughter, this little life with so many years to live. She has a chance to this right. Eliza Lou will never have to be afraid of coming home or wonder if the people she calls family care for her unconditionally. Their daughter will only know holidays full of joy and rooms full of love and days made to be celebrated. And for that, she is thankful.