#tinderdating

How do you send a message on tinder without matching? You stumbled across the profile of an attractive woman while swiping and you may have even given her a Like. Now you’re scared that she might never like you back and you won’t be able to contact her!

You would even (almost) sell your left egg to get a date with this lady 😉

Hence the question burning in the pit of your stomach:

“Can I message on tinder without matching?”

On the internet, many people read the answers that say it’s not possible.

Can you message someone on Tinder if you haven’t matched?

Since the very worthwhile (paid) platinum subscription, there is finally a practical function in Tinder with which you can text someone without a match.

The platinum version of Tinder allows you to attach a message directly to your Super Like that you give the woman.

This extra feature is similar to functions in other dating apps such as Lovoo, where you can send Icebreakers to other users at any time.

You don’t want to get a comfortable platinum subscription?

Then there are still other ways to write to women without the need to match, via some tricks outside of Tinder.

So I don’t want to be a spoilsport where I will tell you below some tricks and how they work.

How to send a message to someone on Tinder without matching

Before you do anything rash that you will regret later, I must first warn you:

STOP!

Immediately take your fingers off your smartphone and don’t give this dream woman a like if her profile is open.

Reason: If you now “swipe away” the lady by giving her a like, her profile will disappear forever if she hasn’t also given you a like.

But you have to keep her profile open because you will need the information from it if you can’t get a like from her.

1. Contact on Instagram

You can message many women on Instagram, especially the attractive ones with well-toned tight bottoms.

Because either they have linked their Instagram account directly to Tinder or have entered their username in the description text.

If that’s the case with your girl, this is very easy; you can now text her with no match, just by opening her Instagram profile and sending her the message you want.

In your message, however, you should refrain from submissive compliments about how pretty she is. And don’t tell her you first saw her on Tinder!

Don’t complicate it, pretend you accidentally saw one of his photos while you were looking for something on Instagram.

Read also: No Matches on Tinder? 10 Tips for More Likes!

2. Use other social networks

She’s not on Instagram, or at least she didn’t mention her account.

Look in her profile description to see if you can find any indication that she is active on other social networks.

By that, I mean platforms such as Snapchat or Facebook.

If you discover a corresponding nickname in her profile text, you can also write to her there without having a match with her on Tinder.

If she hasn’t posted anything from other networks on her Tinder profile, you can also do a Facebook search like this.

Simply enter her name and place of residence in the search function.

But there’s only a chance of finding her if her first name is quite rare and she comes from a small town.

3. More dating sites

In my experience, women don’t sign up for one dating app.

Especially when she feels lonely and longs for a partner; therefore, she is likely to be active on many dating sites and flirting apps to write with men.

For example, there was a woman from Tinder that I accidentally discovered on Parship a few weeks later and another on Lovoo.

So follow these three steps if you want to search for her on other dating sites:

Check her Tinder profile for useful information, such as distance, location, age, nickname, occupation, etc.

Go to other major dating sites and make the appropriate search settings that match her details to search for her specifically.

Write to her there, for example in Lovoo with an Icebreaker.

Maybe you’re lucky and she’s also on the other platform to find her prince charming.

Read also: Tinder Boost: When Is the Best Time to Use It?

4. Use Google Image Search

There is also a pretty clever trick circulating on the internet that you can also use if you want to message women from Tinder without a match:

Google’s reverse image search should make it possible to find the person on other platforms as long as they use the same photo on Tinder.

To do this, proceed as follows:

Take a screenshot of the woman’s profile picture, or preferably all of her profile pictures.

Crop the screenshots so that only the pure photo is visible.

Transfer pictures to a desktop computer (or go to the desktop version of Google search on mobile).

Go to Google image search, click on the small camera symbol to the right of the search bar and upload an image.

Now Google should show in its search results on which pages the uploaded image is used (Facebook, Instagram, etc.), then you can send a message to the woman there.

Whether the trick works or not, however, is a good question.

First of all, the woman has to use the same picture from Tinder on other social networks.

And secondly, Google must correctly recognize and find this image in the search.

Is sending a message to someone on Tinder without matching a good idea?

You find that girl attractive and you want to get to know her, but messaging someone on Tinder without matching wouldn’t be a good idea because:

Firstly, it takes quite a hassle to search for the woman and contact her on other platforms.

Second, she never liked you before, so the chances of her liking you elsewhere are slim.

Instead, you should ask yourself why you don’t get any matches from the ladies you like.

And if you have more matches, you also will have enough choices from hot girls.

And then you can write to all these women directly on Tinder and meet them in real life to save yourself from the stalking maze.

Read also:

How to Send Pictures on Tinder? All You Need to Know

Is Tinder Platinum Worth It? All Your Questions Answered

How to Get Unlimited Likes on Tinder: 3 Best Tricks

Best Tinder Bios for Guys: 20 Good and Funny Ideas

Tinder Shadowban: What Is It and How Can You Fix It

23 Tinder Hacks You Probably Didn’t Know About

How to See Who Liked You on Tinder for Free? 4 Best Tips

How Many Likes Do You Get on Tinder Per Day for Free?

Apparently these extra sexual encounters appear in a series of three. Meet Darrell.

He was cute, tall, and British. He jumped right into a friendly text convo.

Only problem was he was traveling for work and didn’t live in Seattle. He was heading back to the UK, and I hadn’t noticed at first in his profile. He asked if I was around that evening, but when I think of a travelling man, I think of a one night stand. I hadn’t responded because I wasn’t sure if I was up for it - I had a pre-wedding party to attend. 

I went to the Garage on Capitol Hill, a bar that had bowling and pool. My friend was hosting a party the night before her wedding. I didn’t know very many people, and was surrounded by couples and love. I felt compelled to talk to Darrell.

Darrell was with a coworker at the Unicorn, a loud and colorful bar not too far from where I was. It was convenient enough for me to swing by and say “hello” and get some attention from a cute boy, then head home. I had a video project to work on before the next morning, so I should have given myself a curfew. Should have.

He introduced me to his coworker and immediately got me a drink. We chatted for a bit about his work, and his visit. He was about to head to Vegas for a work conference as well. His friend disappeared - we weren’t sure where he went, given alcohol consumption was already high. It didn’t take long before Darrell and I were two teenagers sliding into first base by the pinball machine. 

We decided we needed a venue change.

Given my project deadline, I felt it was easier for me to exit a guy’s hotel room than to kick him out of my house, so we went to his hotel; Pineapple Hotel. It’s a hotel covered in Pineapples in downtown.

So this is what it feels like to go back to a guy’s hotel room who was just visiting for work? Clean sheets, sterile environment - and in this case, covered in bright black and yellow (black and yellow) pineapples. 

Darrell was great - the minimal conversation we had was nice, and if he lived in Seattle, I probably would have wanted to see him again. Given he was leaving in two days back to the UK, we had to make the one night count, with all the pineapples. It was roughly 2am before I headed home.

The next day we texted a bit - it helps to not have it feel like a complete one night stand, only that it was.

 At least we continued to exchange pleasantries.

-May 26, 2018

My friend gave him that name, and it was perfectly fitting. It wasn’t apparent at first - his messages came off as happy-go-lucky, a positive tone. 

His name was Adam, and I was meeting him right after Dragon-Breath, I mean Gavin. We had played some text tag and pushed our date out due to his inability to “show up” on time.

He was at his sister’s house, and she offered to give him a ride to the bar to meet up with me. He then sounded frustrated she hadn’t left the house yet, so he was waiting on her. Which begged the question: why didn’t he just take a Lyft or drive? I’d soon find out he have just been your average bum.

Adam showed up, in a hoodie with a jean jacket over - just like his photos - wearing a baseball cap. He would be attractive if he wasn’t so cagey and shifty - resembling a cracked out homeless man. He even had a shifty walk, slightly hunched over.

When we got to the bar, I asked him what kind of beer he liked. “Whatever’s the cheapest” he bumbled - this was not a good look. I found myself wanting to chat w/ the bartender instead since she was much more filled with light.

We got a table and he dove right into his sob story of poverty. He worked two jobs, one as a bar-back and one as a barista - averaging about 80 hours a week. He said he was saving up to travel, but he was also moving into a large house with 12 other roommates, because he couldn’t afford rent. He lived in Capitol Hill, where the average 1-bedroom is upwards of $1800/month - his rent was $1200. He worked 80 hour weeks, and could not afford $1200 in rent, which explains why he was waiting on his sister for a ride. There couldn’t be any more brighter red flags waving in front of a 36 year old woman, but that wasn’t what made me look at my watch. It was his attitude.

His entire mantra was “poor me, I’m poor” - what was he doing on Bumble? I was seriously thinking it was his way of getting a free beer. He should have put “Entrepreneur” under occupation. He was so miffed about his sister not giving him a ride and apologetic for his tardiness, but I didn’t know how to continue the conversation.

Finally I asked what time his next bus was. He looked at his phone and muttered, “half hour”. He appeared very displeased.

“Ok well since I feel guilty that I have to head home before your bus arrives, I’ll get the beers.” - not a thank you, or even a “you sure?” just stared at the table with an ever so slight nod.

I went to the bartender and gave her my card. “Together?” 

I pressed my lips together to a painful smile and ever so slightly nodded. 

I turned to wave goodbye and he was right behind me - not awkward at all. We walked out, I gave him a hug and want on my merry way.

Fuck, Marry, Kill: Dragon Breath, Quintessential Loser, or Farting Gene - GO!

Let’s be real, I’d probably kill them all.

-April 15, 2018

After a few months of "casual dating" I have concluded that casual dating is giving your time to people you normally wouldn't, but your options are so thin that you keep doing it anyway. All of the guys I have gone on second dates with I would never have gone on second dates with if I were in a bigger city with more date options. 

Am I doing this right?

I went on my third date with Escape Room Guy and decided to not try to fix silences by asking him questions about himself. I just started a new term at school and was kind of waiting for him to ask me what classes I’m taking... but he never did. 

Het is zo’n zinderende zomer waarover ik vorig jaar klaagde dat ik het nooit zou meemaken in Nederland. Weken achtereen zonnig zomers weer, dagen waarop je wakker wordt en niet hoeft na te denken of je vandaag de deur wel uit kan op je slippers. Af en toe een typische Nederlandse zomerdag (bewolkt en fris), waardoor je extra van de niet typische Nederlandse zomerdagen kunt genieten.

Bij een zinderende zomer hoort ook een zinderende zomerliefde. Eentje waarmee je tot diep in de nacht op dakterrassen wijn kunt drinken en waarmee je nooit uitgepraat lijkt te zijn. Eentje waarmee je ’s nachts hand in hand door de broeierige stad kunt rennen, af en toe stoppend om elkaar ongegeneerd op straat te zoenen. Iemand die van precies dezelfde zomervibes houdt en je liedjes toestuurt die al lang in je Spotify-lijstje staan of je liedjes toestuurt waarvan je niet snapt hoe je zonder dat liedje je leven hebt kunnen leven.

Een aantal weken geleden, op zo’n fijne zomeravond waarop je geen jas nodig hebt, had ik een date. Met iemand waar een van mijn vriendinnen heel hard om moest lachen, “Want dat is toch helemaal geen type voor jou?”. En misschien was het inderdaad niet helemaal mijn type, maar hij is een boogschutter en ik ook en ik was heel benieuwd hoe het zou zijn om met een mede-boogschutter te daten. Allemaal heel zweverig enzo, maar sinds de Elle Zomerhoroscoop van 2017 nogal on point bleek te zijn, ben ik er toch een beetje in gaan geloven.

Oke, terug naar die date-avond. Hij stelde voor om naar Baek te gaan en daar was ik nog nooit geweest (het is onmogelijk om alle chille eet- en drinktentjes in de stad bij te houden). Hulde aan mezelf, want ik kwam precies om de afgesproken klokslag half 9 aangelopen. Hij zat al buiten op het terras, dus ik tikte hem op zijn schouder en hij draaide zich om. En toen had ik één van die zeldzame momenten dat toen we elkaar aankeken er miljoen volt energie knetterde en mede-boogschutter Cupido al zijn pijlen in één keer afvuurde. Een van de weinige keren dat dat eerder gebeurde, was met mijn Franse vakantieliefde Hubert en dat was de ne jamais oublier.

Waar ik negen van de tien keer in één miliseconde al weet  “nope, not gonna happen” had ik nu in één miliseconde zoiets van “jup, this is better gonna happen”. Dus ik schoof aan, bestelde wijn en dat was het begin van een hele leuke, neverending avond, die nacht werd en doorging tot in de ochtend. Het was alsof ik iemand was tegen gekomen die op precies dezelfde frequentie als mij opereert en met dezelfde energie door het leven fladdert (jaja, nog meer zweverig gedoe, I know). En voor iemand die vaak het gevoel heeft op een andere golflengte te zitten dan de rest van de wereld, was dit een hele verademing.

En die eerste date werd een tweede. Want hij vond het ook heel leuk, en hij zei dat ook gewoon, zonder moeilijk te doen of hard to get te spelen enzo, tegen alle dating-anno-2018-regels in. We hadden eigenlijk afgesproken om elkaar na een week of twee weer te zien (drukke agenda’s enzo), maar hij besloot toch om een paar dagen later alweer voor de deur te staan, omdat het anders te lang zou duren. Hij kwam binnen, legde een stapel “Omdat ik anders morgenochtend honger moet lijden” boterhammen in de koelkast (ik heb bijna nooit brood in huis) en verloren onszelf weer in de tijd en urenlange gesprekken.

En die tweede date werd een derde, afgelopen vrijdag. En ook die was weer enorm fijn. Hij haalde mij thuis op, ontvoerde me naar zijn huis in Schiedam en kookte allerlei lekkere dingen die we op zijn zonovergoten dakterras (#winning) opaten. Hij werkte vroeger als kok, dus #skills #winningagain. Toen ik later die nacht enorm trek kreeg in koekjes en hem vertelde dat mijn favoriete koekjes donkerbruintjes zijn, toverde hij een pak donkerbruintjes tevoorschijn, want ja, dat waren ook zijn favoriete koekjes. Ja hallo, kan dit ooit nog misgaan???