John: You know I think Lemar would have loved you

Yelena: Yeah

John: Yeah

Yelena: Natasha would hate you

John laughs

Yelena: No, she would like you

John: Why

walker: what's updog?

yelena: nothing much how about you?

walker: wha- oh! oh that's funny

- bucky walks in -

walker: hey bucky, why does it smell like updog in here?

bucky: ...i don't know, why?

Yelena: shit...i broke my cookie, guess we lost!..

John whose cookie was almost done: what do you mean w-

Yelena, slapping the cookie out of John's hand: WE lost, john...😔

He’s her favorite sparring partner because she knows she doesn’t have to hold back. She knows she can’t hurt him, not really, so she gives it everything she’s got. He’s back up and ready the second she takes him down, usually grinning or egging her on, unwilling to let her win.

She’ll punch him in the arm after he makes a joke at her expense, knowing it won’t even leave a bruise, despite her using her full strength. She’ll poke at him or pinch him whenever the opportunity arises, only to be met with a quick hand brushing her away like a gnat.

When he asks her to pass him something, she’ll purposely hurl it has hard as she can in his direction. Most times he’ll catch it, rolling his eyes as he does so. Sometimes she’ll manage to catch him off guard and the item will hit him square in the chest, only knocking the breath out of him for a moment before he recovers. She always grins triumphantly when she manages to surprise him.

Her goal of course is never to hurt him, it’s just nice to not have to calculate her every little move in fear of injuring the other person. She’d never had that before. She was always the fastest, the strongest, so she’s never been able to just do without thinking. The couple times she’d really gotten a good hit in or thought she might’ve actually hurt him, she’d stop immediately to check and make sure he’s fine. Which he always assured her he was.

He of course doesn’t mind being the target of her shenanigans, she’d know it if he did. He honestly thinks it’s kind of funny/fun to watch her really put her full effort into something that’s not a life or death situation. He’s remembering what it’s like to be a big brother, and she’s learning how to be a little sister again.

Alexei: What does hydrophobic means

John: It means she's afraid of gay people

Valentina: no it doesn-

Yelena constantly bullying Walker without a single break all day but the second the team is told that they have to double up on beds she is practically leaping to be paired with John (dad snores, ava kicks, bob kicks, bucky stares at you while you are sleeping) because he sleeps like a dead body, military style. Someone asked if they are dating, Yelena said she would rather kill herself.

Ava does not seem to have a concept of privacy and will fully phase into the bathroom while another person is using it. No one seems to mind except Walker who just yelled at her "to announce when you come in jesus." Someone asked if they were together, she said she would rather kill herself.

Bob blatantly takes the other clothes, going one day with Bucky's old man shirt and trousers on to the next wearing one of Yelena's trendy cropped shirts and Alexei's big ass shorts. He also once took Ava's sweater off her, while she was wearing it mind you, and put it on and walked away without either of them saying a word.

They all say weirdly cryptic phrases like "ok but what about a remote controlled car with a camera and a bomb strapped to it?" or "pull a carrie but it's actually full of acid" when they are frustrated and trying to calm down (for example, they are all training together to deal with the next world ending threat and Ava is getting frustrated that her phasing is not lasting as long as it should and Alexei pats her arm and just says, "we get a giant hammer and play wack a mole". and nothing else and somehow that makes her feel better???). Eventually the other heroes realize they spitball ways to murder Val to calm down/as stress relief. Sam, who was very worried about Val controlling them, isn't sure if he should feel relieved or more concerned.

It get's revealed at one point that Bucky secretly put trackers in all of them (he snuck one in bob's cereal to get his inside him) and all of them kinda seem touched. Him and Walker share a bit of a moment when John realizes that he was involved in Bucky's stalkery caring too--when someone asks if they are an item Bucky's says even the thought of hypothetically being with John makes him want to kill himself.

Every time they win a battle someone yells "go bears!" for some reason. It was really awkward the one time they had to fight mutant bears.

They also play a game where they get points for using the funniest thing as a weapon (Yelena impressively used a labubu once, Joaquin is scarred for life). John is always winning because he gets a taco-shield boost in points every battle (winning at what cost).

70% of the time it means that they are ragebating each other, but the other 30% … when they have a common target … let me tell you that they suddenly become drift compatible out of nowhere. If they both want to piss off the same person, they suddenly become an improv comedy duo that has been touring together for fifty years.