StarClan's Fallen Chapter 3
Little Lion
Content Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Child Abuse, Psychological Manipulation, Implied Substance Use, Grief, Coercion, Death.
Dark Forest Lore here for context
The days since meeting Petalkit had certainly been interesting.
Thistleclaw had not known Silverhawk for very long, but it had taken him only a half moon to conclude his new mentor was inconveniently vigilant. Impressive, yes, a true warrior worthy of his admiration, but still inconvenient. The older tom was just as relentless as him in training, and even rivaled Bluefur’s watchful eyes back in his days as a living ThunderClan cat. While he was pleased to sharpen his skills and feel his power grow every day, it was often soured by Silverhawk’s patronizing attitude towards him. Constantly treating him like a bumbling kit who didn’t have a clue at what he was doing.
With Mapleshade, at the least the scowling looks and scalding words were coming from an ancient legend. The she-cat did have reign over the Dark Forest after all. He had hoped to gain her favor as she trained him in pursuit of securing his place as ThunderClan deputy—while he was alive that is. Not that it mattered now, as Bluefur had stolen his rightful place as deputy. And it was all because Sunstar had made a foolish, foolish mistake! Mapleshade had mocked him for this as his failure, and no longer deemed him worth the cost of dividing her attention. He was Silverhawk’s burden now. The Dark Forest queen, as many called her, had fixated on a RiverClan cat named Crookedjaw he had seen her train a pawful of times. He could not place his claw on it, but he had a sneaking suspicion this was somehow related to her hatred against her former mate.
Mapleshade offered no explanation, of course, just the expectation of obedience. And obedient Thistleclaw was, accepting Silverhawk to mentor him in Mapleshade’s place without much complaint. Not that he had a choice in the matter. It was a decent choice to begin with.
Was.
Thistleclaw quickly grew tired of Silverhawk as his superior. Useful as the older tom was, Thistleclaw needed to get him out of his fur to train his own apprentice, Petalkit, without any disturbance or threat of being discovered. Especially by Mapleshade. So far he had been successful in staying undetected, and he owed it to his discovery of a remarkably secluded area shrouded in fog that was guarded by tree-thick, winding thorns. It bore a sinister resemblance to ThunderClan’s gorse tunnel entrance.
That was where he began to train Mapleshade’s kit. She was a fierce kit indeed! Perfectly angry and burning with vengeful determination like her mother. It was almost endearing.
However, Thistleclaw had earned Silverhawk's suspicion. His mentor had taken notice of his inconsistent attendance. The confrontation was inevitable and adversarial, but Thistleclaw had persuaded Silverhawk to meet him in private, lured by the promise of a deal worth his time.
Now stationed at the agreed time and place, far away from Mapleshade’s eyes and ears, there was only one thing left to do.
Thistleclaw sat and waited.
*****
Silverhawk’s eyes were chips of ice blazing in the Dark Forest’s gloom. The cold fog whirled around his paws, weaving through the wilted ferns like a serpent made of smoke. The tall, bark-stripped trees creaked above him, sounding very similar to old, dry bones grinding together, and groaning at the chilling wind breathing too hard against it.The moon’s pale, dim light barely broke through the tangle of interlocking branches arching over the two quarreling toms.
"Fox-dung!” Silverhawk spat with a curled lip. “You expect me to believe that? You sound like a fuzz-brained kit spewing nursery tales!”
Thistleclaw’s fur lifted at the contempt in Silverhawk’s tone. His claws itched to slash at his mentor’s face into bloody shreds, but decided now was not the time. Not yet at least.Thistleclaw allowed a single claw to slide out, and tap idly at the slimy undergrowth beneath his paws. His own voice grew rigid with an equal bite to his words.
“Yes.” He growled through his teeth, forcing his fur flat. “I do, and you will believe me.”
"Oh yes?” Silverhawk scoffed, taking a step closer towards the other Dark Forest cat. His icy blue eyes pierced through the mist with promising menace. “And why is that? Apprentice." He challenged with a venomous sneer.
Thistleclaw simply stared. His extended claw twitched as he felt a swell of anger burn in his chest. His whiskers quivered, hackles spiking when he drew in a sharp intake of breath with flaring nostrils. Then slowly, the corner of his mouth tugged into a smile.
"Because I can prove it." He purred, amber eyes sparkling in silent triumph.
Silverhawk narrowed his eyes coolly. "You're lying."
"I'm not." Thistleclaw’s tail lashed sharply behind him, yet his smirk remained. "I can prove it, Silverhawk."
His mentor’s silvery gray tabby fur bristled out like an agitated crest of feathers. Silverhawk’s confronting stare sharpened, muzzle shoving forward to Thistleclaw’s face. “Then prove it.” He snarled, fangs bared like poised talons over prey.
“Prove it yourself.” Thistleclaw purred with a flourish of his tail. It curled free from his paws to reveal the bundle of leaves he held in his possession. It was wrapped around a small cluster of fungi with a peculiar glow.
Silverhawk had lowered his muzzle to sniff at it, tail giving a dubious flick. He pawed at it, rolling it back for closer inspection. Threaded his claws through the layers of dry leaves, he peeled them off the unfamiliar fungi. It seemed to be a different color and size than what Silverhawk was used to seeing. The small, scattering patches of fungi lining the mossy, gnarled roots of rotten trees he’s seen looked nothing like the ones Thistleclaw presented. They almost looked floral by comparison, with strange unfurling frills tinged with a haunting, rosy glow. It was beautiful but horribly misplaced. Nothing beautiful belonged in the Dark Forest.
The older tom tossed Thistleclaw a steely glare, frosty eyes glinting like black ice. “And what am I supposed to do with this?” Silverhawk demanded. “What’s so special about these?”
Thistleclaw stretched out a paw to press against the fungi, slowly crushing the bundle together. He ground them down until beads of bright, nectar-like fluid wept from the pores and pooled around his flexing claws. Silverhawk’s head bobbed with suspicious fascination, curiosity seemingly overriding wariness when a surprisingly sweet scent captured his nose. The older tom parted his jaws, pupils dilating when he tasted the air like syrup.
Thistleclaw met Silverhawk’s widened gaze. “Lick it.”
Silverhawk’s face hardened with measured scrutiny. “I’m no fool Thistleclaw, how does this grant me the sleep you promise?” He didn’t sound convinced or impressed.
“Just lick it!” Thistleclaw snapped impatiently. “It’s not like we can be poisoned—”
Silverhawk didn’t let him finish. His powerful forepaw whipped out and savagely cuffed his apprentice across the face. The blow knocked Thistleclaw off balance, legs tangling under him as he tried to stay upright, but Silverhawk rushed after him. Another blow slammed against Thistleclaw’s temple hard, making him topple over and hit the ground.
Silverhawk thrust his muzzle in Thistleclaw’s face with his lips pulled over his fangs, each word emphasized with a flash of teeth. “You don’t give me orders, apprentice!” His hackles spiked, ragged fur mimicking ruffled, jagged feathers. “Now enough games!”
“I stopped playing games when I was a kit!” Thistleclaw spat back, hind legs pushing against his mentor’s gut in protest. “I have no time for games, and neither do you. What reason would I have to waste both our time?” His brazen amber eyes ignited like a steady flame.
The older tom paused, hesitant, but the calculation in his eyes never left. His scarred muzzle twisting with the dawn of a frown. Neither cat spoke for a moment, the silence sharper than claws cutting through the ghostly mist feeding off the tension.
“This deal you offer for my silence…” Silverhawk began carefully, while still studying his apprentice’s face. “Is it true?” He glanced at the mysterious fungi like he was still trying to assess an unknown threat. He pointed at it with his nose, catching a whiff of its unnatural, honeyed scent. “I can sleep? Truly sleep?” He breathed in disbelief, something wistful creeping in his voice that he couldn't keep even. “I can actually…”
“Dream again?” Thistleclaw filled in, as if he could hear his mentor’s thoughts. “It’s the only way you can.” He added with a whispering purr towards Silverhawk’s ear. “Think about it. When was the last time you even remember what dreaming was like? Imagine, being able to relive the memories you had alive.”
Thistleclaw forepaws gave another push, unhurried this time. Silverhawk complied, stepping off his apprentice wordlessly with distant eyes but kept his gaze locked. Thistleclaw felt a surge of satisfaction at the sight of his mentor’s stormy expression battling with the emotions he unearthed. Perfect.
“When I was alive…” Silverhawk murmured more to himself than the cat rising to his paws in front of him. “If what you’re saying is true, does that mean I can dream of cats I used to know?”
“Yes.” Thistleclaw confirmed with a knowing nod, eyes glowing victoriously. “Even your mate.”
Silverhawk visibly stiffened with flattened ears, and Thistleclaw relished the sound of his mentor’s shuddering breath—a sound never heard before that only he, Thistleclaw earned. I have your attention now, don’t I Silverhawk?
“Emberdawn?” Silverhawk’s croaked, voice strained like he was being choked. But the sly look Thistleclaw was giving him made him growl and clear his throat. He tried again with reclaimed dignity. “I can see Emberdawn?”
Thistleclaw smiled too pleasantly for Silverhawk’s liking. All suspicion returned with a growl bubbling up his throat. He unsheathed his black claws, tail violently slicing through the swirling mist.
“How do I know if this isn’t a dirty trick?” He hissed, fur bristling and splitting like sharp quills.
Thistleclaw shrugged. “Then you’ll never know. Not my problem.”
Silverhawk’s claws made gouges into the dank soil. He didn’t even need to say anything, Thistleclaw could see his mentor was fuming and trying to contain his rage. No doubt, Silverhawk was probably imagining ripping him apart. But his eyes and gritting teeth told Thistleclaw he was still torn, thinking deeply with the curse of indecision. Thistleclaw smiled to himself. Perhaps he should help his dear mentor with a little persuasion.
Thistleclaw heaved a heavy sigh, trying to sound crestfallen.“Well, if you can’t trust me then I suppose I will be on my way. I’ll just take this back before it goes to waste.” Thistleclaw’s paw began to reach towards the glowing fungi.
“Wait.”
Silverhawk had firmly planted his paw down to block Thistleclaw’s path. “Not yet.” He growled, and this time he seemed reluctant to meet Thistleclaw’s eyes. What a lovely sight, Thistleclaw thought, feeling like the Dark Forest itself was giving him a little treat.
Thistleclaw cocked his head to the side, blinking with confused innocence.
Silverhawk clenched his jaw and obsidian claws sank into the ground where the fungi’s liquid pooled. “Let me try it first.” Silverhawk murmured at last. Then his eyes flashed dangerously at the other tom. “This better be worth it, apprentice.”
His growl lacked the same, vicious bite it had before. Now, Thistleclaw’s whiskers merely twitched with amusement at being called an apprentice. From this day forward,Thistleclaw decided with a pleased flick of his tail, he will never be anyone's apprentice ever again.
Thistleclaw felt unstoppable.
********
The first thing Petalkit felt was the sun’s warmth against her pelt. The morning hum of a waking forest greeted her next, slowly coaxing her to consciousness with distant chirps of song birds. The kit began to stir, ears pricking at the buzz of insects and the rustle of fern fronds above her. She was only dimly aware of the gentle pattering sound that followed.
Plip-plip
What was that noise?
Splat!
Something wet hit her nose.
Instantly, Petalkit sprang to life. Startled into alertness, she stood with fluffed out fur and unsheathed claws. Hissing with her light brown pelt puffed out like fuzzy dandelion tufts, she was fully expecting a fight. She was surprised to feel a tickle of disappointment when she was met with the morning’s welcoming thrum instead. Her new obsidian claws sank into damp soil, only then realizing she wasn’t in the Dark Forest anymore. In its place, she found herself inside a non-rotting, hollowed tree stump draped with dewy ferns rustling overhead.
Plip
Another pair of droplets spattered across her snout, and she shook her head growling in annoyance. A part of her had hoped for a confrontation and opportunity to practice her newly learned battle moves. She really wanted to try that paw strike Thistleclaw showed her! Slash the intruder across the nose just like this annoying twig she decided to rake her claws across. It snapped into a spin and Petalkit was pleased to see the marks she left on it.
Dead stick!
With a surge of triumph she pounced on it, paws scooping and tossing it into the air a couple of times. Die again! Die again! She imagined the scrawny neck of a vole—no rabbit, squirming between her at her mercy. Her sharp little teeth crunched down into the wood, her muzzle wrinkling with focused ferocity.
For a moment, Petalkit pictured a moss ball in the stick’s place. She thought about the nursery. Pressing against the curve of Mapleshade’s warm belly, soft and surrounded by the scent of sweet milk. Patchkit clinging and blending into their mother’s fur. Larchkit’s competitive eyes on her.
Watch this, Larchkit!
She shook the stick violently in front of him.
Then stilled.
Wait…
Petalkit dropped her battered stick.
The nursery was gone. She was alone again.
Suddenly feeling heavy, Petalkit’s hindquarters slumped down and her ears drooped. Perhaps that’s when she finally noticed the sharp pangs of hunger gnawing at her empty belly. Despite the wave of dizziness that followed, Petalkit's appetite was still absent. Her body whined with demands of its return, but the little she-cat gave it no attention. Later, she told herself as she laid down against the forest floor, chin forlornly resting on her paws. Now she just didn’t feel like doing anything. Even the skitter of a juicy-looking beetle crawling by couldn't entice her.
Why did you leave me behind, mama? You promised you would never leave me!
Petalkit’s gleaming claws hooked into the dirt, her small body tightening into a ball.
You promised!
The edges of her eyes began to burn, stinging deep in her nostrils. The tree hollow around her was fuzzy now, colors bleeding into each other and rippling like a disturbed puddle.
You promised…
Petalkit sniffed loudly with a tightened jaw. Her head kept swimming with fragments of Mapleshade’s smiling face and the laughter she shared with her brothers.
Mouse-brain! Thistleclaw’s scolding words echoed in her head. Crying won’t solve anything! Only the weak have time for that!
She sniffed again. Her golden eyes glistened and felt the weight of gathered tears threatening to spill out.
I’m not crying! Mama is gone forever anyways! Thistleclaw said she faded away long, long ago!
Petalkit trembled with uneven breaths.
I don’t cry anymore!
The traitorous tears that escaped her said otherwise.
******
“Now, try to endure my attacks without falling over.”
“B-but, you’re so much bigger than me!”
“Your enemies won’t care about that!”
“It doesn’t seem fair!”
“You should know by now nothing is fair. Only strength matters!” Thistleclaw raised a forepaw, shimmering black claws half-sheathed. “Prepare yourself!” He hissed.
Petalkit barely had the time. His paw crashed down hard across the little she-cat’s bunched shoulders. Her small frame didn’t have a chance. She was toppling over from the force of Thistleclaw’s blow, and paws no longer touching the rocky surface of the ledge she stood on. Crashing hard against the cliff’s steep slope, Petalkit was violently rolling down its path with her world spinning and paws churning. While Thistleclaw had deemed the height survivable, Petalkit shared no appreciation for his choice when she hit the bottom with a heavy thump. Winded and groaning against the crinkling leaves under her nose, Petalkit decided she never wanted to experience such a tumble ever again.The kit’s stubby legs shook as she tried to ease herself back to her paws.
Never again! She vowed to herself. Never, ever!
“Again!” Thistleclaw demanded, waiting above her and peering down. “Get back here!”
“Brace yourself.” Was the only warning she got.
Mouse-dung!
Growling, the little she-cat scrambled up the slope trying not to pay attention to the aches her body screamed with. Thistleclaw was staring down at her expectantly, watching her struggle and using her shiny, black claws to gain purchase whenever she almost slipped. His own obsidian-like claws flexed and tapped impatiently as Petalkit heaved herself over the ledge panting.
Petalkit’s golden eyes widened in alarm.“Wait-” but the Dark Forest cat’s swiping paw had already connected. Once again she tumbled down to the bottom of the slope with a sharp cry.
“Mousebrain!” Thistleclaw’s call sounded above her. “Do you think your opponent will wait around for you to get up? Hurry up!”
“At least they won’t be as ugly as you.” The kit grumbled.
“What was that?”
“Nothing!” Petalkit shouted back spitefully, hissing as her muscles protested but began her exhausting ascent again. She was going to smack his face! The terrain must have heard that because her paw slipped on a treacherous, loose rock. Wincing, she found herself roughly sliding back down the jagged slope with squeaks of pain. Her eyes burned with the sting of tears and she tried to muffle a sniffle. Don’t cry! She scolded herself. Only weaklings cry!
Tap-tap.
Petalkit could hear the echo of Thistleclaw’s claws above her. She grit her teeth, irritated that Thistleclaw was irritated. Well, she was more irritated than him! This time she was watching his paw carefully as she clambered over the edge. Thistleclaw’s paw swung towards her and she quickly managed to roll out of its path. Panting, she hastily rose to her paws and glared at Thistleclaw defiantly with her sprout of a tail held high.
“Not bad, kit.” The Dark Forest tom growled but it was barely a praise. “But I didn’t say you could dodge, did I?”
“Oh come on!” Petalkit huffed in frustration, stamping her little feet. “How am I supposed to-”
Once again, Thistleclaw didn't let her finish and found herself at the bottom of the slope.
Again!?
“I hate you!” She screeched up at him.
“Good.” Thistleclaw purred. “Then show me!”
A tiny, brittle snarl tore from Petalkit’s throat and it cracked with anger. She threw herself against the slope with relentless determination. She tried again.
And again.
And again.
Each time, she was sent flying off the cliff with vicious precision. Thistleclaw never held back and he had no intention in changing that any time soon—or ever, for that matter. He would be doing the kit a disservice if he softened his blows, an insult to her endless potential. She was Mapleshade’s kit after all. And it showed. Once, Petalkit had managed to withstand two blows before he swatted her off the stone ledge and let gravity do the rest for him. She fought even against that, paws flailing like she might be able to grab onto air.
But gravity always won and she would always lose.
Bruised, battered, but driven by pure stubbornness, Petalkit kept forcing her shaking body to stand. Her body sang with pain, but so did her burning defiance, refusing to stay down. Any normal kit would have lost consciousness by now, presuming they were still alive. Fortunately for her, she refused to be normal, and the Dark Forest’s Affliction greatly reinforced this with grim favoritism. The kit had been under the impression her survival was her own doing, and prided herself in this feat. The Dark Forest knew better of course. The curse granted Petalkit the small mercy of ignorance, and simply ensured the kit did not starve to death or die from exposure to the elements.
Tap-tap.
“Sure you can handle this kit?” Thistleclaw taunted above her.
“I’m going to smack you!” Petalkit shrieked back with all the savagery she could muster. This time she was going to do it!
“I’d like to see you try!” The Dark Forest cat jeered.“Try it, little lion!”
“I will!” The kit snarled back, hackles bursting into fluffy spikes that doubled her size.
Truly, for a moment, it looked as though LionClan had blessed her with their rage.Up she climbed with renewed strength, her fury driving forward on bleeding paws but she didn’t seem to notice anymore. Her black claws shined even in the pale light as they tenaciously scraped up the rocky incline.
“That’s it…” Thistleclaw urged, tail flicking in anticipation. His eyes glowed with sadistic approval, twin sparks of ember dancing in darkness.
Hissing furiously through her teeth, Petalkit’s claws raked and gripped at the edge of the cliff. Thistleclaw’s forepaw had risen in anticipation, aiming to give a swift, brutal strike with visible claws. His swipe came fast and heavy, but this time it did not connect. Instead, Petalkit had quickly let go of the ledge to let her body slip backwards and just out of reach.Thistleclaw slashed empty air and did not expect thorn-sharp claws to dig into his skin. Petalkit’s forelegs were tightly wrapped around his swinging paw, her entire body being carried off with the motion.
“What are you doing!?” Thisteclaw yowled in surprise.
He couldn’t shake her off. The little she-cat was aggressively scrambling up his foreleg in alarming speed like some crazed squirrel scaling up a tree.
“Trying to smack you!” Petalkit growled, lunged upwards with a swiping paw.
“You—!”
She hit him.
Right across the muzzle with a resounding whack!
Thistleclaw blinked, taken aback before snarling furiously.
“Cheating scrap of fur!” He twisted his head to snap at her, but Petalkit was latched behind his shoulder, his jaws catching a mouthful of his own fur instead. He spat it out. “You’re only supposed to take hits! You stupid mouse-brain!”
“You didn’t say I couldn't hit back!”
Thistleclaw froze with a sputtering breath of disbelief. It seemed the Dark Forest tom was unsure which words he was trying to spit out.
She was right.
Smack!
Petalkit was given an opening, and she didn’t waste the opportunity. “Take that!”
Smack!
Thorn-sharp claws had scraped across Thistleclaw's stunned face. He blinked once more, as if he was unsure what just happened, or even what emotion he should be feeling. Impressed? Furious? Both? But when those little claws snagged his ear, Thistleclaw growled and shook her off. Despite her efforts, Petalkit was flung off from Thistleclaw's thrashing and her back met a rotten tree. It crumbled around her as she groaned, now dazed.
Thistleclaw was fuming and stomped after her. He bared his teeth with a harsh growl, and tail whipping behind him. “I should claw your eyes out for that!” He snarled, anger rushing through his paws and nearly making him do just that. But caught himself, and simply cuffed her hard across the ears. His claws only partially sheathed.
“Ow!” Came Petalkit's shrill squeak, eyes stinging and watering. “No fair!”
Another cuff by her ears and she tumbled back.
“Survival does not care about fairness! Had I been a true enemy, you would have been in pieces by now!”
“I still hit you!” Petalk retorted, eyes fierce and bright despite feeling sore all over. Her chest even puffed out proudly, smugly lifting her chin.
Thistleclaw snorted. “Hardly! You got lucky once!”
“Nu-uh! I hit you twice!”
“Fine you little piece of dung! You got lucky twice.”
Petalkit beamed. “Yay! I win then!”
The kit bounced up and down, paws dancing in victory. Or rather she attempted to. The strength she borrowed from pure adrenaline suddenly left her. Her legs stopped pretending they could hold her up, and her swaying, little body collapsed onto the ground flat on her belly. Ow, ow, ow! was all her brain could say. Her body whined and complained about all her aches and bruises. Did it really have to remind her of her bleeding paws and scratches? Her hunger was uninvited, but it joined in anyways with a growling belly.
Stupid body! Stop bullying me!
“Looks like it’s time for you to wake up.” Thistleclaw meowed above her, not very concerned.
Petalkit weakly shook her head in disagreement. She could barely keep her eyes open.
“Yes, it is.” Growled sternly. “And get those wounds taken care of. Do you remember what to look for?”
“N-no…”
Thistleclaw sighed, exasperated. “Start with cobwebs and-”
“I already know that one!” Petalkit interrupted. She couldn’t lift her head, but she could hear Thistleclaw was frustrated. She watched his claw tapping in annoyance.
“Marigold.” Her mentor huffed gruffly. “The rest is your problem.”
“But I forgot where to find them!” Petalkit cried after him.
“Then try to remember.” Thistleclaw replied dryly, turning around to leave.
Petalkit could feel her consciousness fading fast. She could barely see Thisteclaw’s departing paws.
“H-hey!” Her tired, little mew was dragged down by exhaustion. She could feel her real, physical body shifting around in the living world.
“Be here tonight,” Thistleclaw called back flatly. Then his paws slowed, as if he were glancing over his shoulder. “Try not to die, little warrior.”
“I like lion a lot better.” Petalkit mumbled quietly, the Dark Forest and Thistleclaw dissolving around her. Her dream was coming to an end.
Thistleclaw actually chuckled, as if her words tickled him.
“Then don’t die on me, little lion.”
