#thisisstupid

told my therapist about the hallucinations / realized she can’t prescribe medication and i might have to find a psychiatrist/general doctor who can. i don’t need antipsychotics by any means but i almost certainly need antidepressants cause i guess i don’t wanna die more than i do. 

not having an amazing time in my relationship, mostly because i’m hyperemotional and defensive and my gf refuses to admit when she’s not communicating well and also being hyperemotional and defensive and our relationship is too young to pretend like we know how to communicate with each other in the best possible way / pretend like we know what to expect from the other person/how to read stupid fucking texts in each other’s tones

i love being w her but can’t help but feel like we rushed into things

i feel shitty and unable to contribute positive change to the people around me

also here to document that banjo is peeing on shit in the apt and so i need to figure out that shit stat

i hope future lexi can write something nicer, i just feel like garbage right now