something about the progression of jerejean sharing a bed together till they get to full on cuddling.
first it's just them sharing the space, not touching, only facing each other and getting used to the warmth and feel of another body beside you.
then slowly they'll gravitate closer. they still won't totally touch but it's close enough that jean will feel every twitch from jeremy and every puff of warm breath as he exhales.
then it's small touches. jean holding jeremy's wrist while he sleeps feeling jeremy's pulse under his thumb. then it will be a foot hooked over an ankle and heads pressed together.
then. jeremy will start as the little spoon in the sense that he'll roll over naturally and jean will gravitate towards him unknowingly until he wakes pressed up against his back. it's the heat that's a little overbearing for him until he comes to his senses and feels skin on skin. the backs of jeremy's thighs and calves stuck to the front of jean's. and he'll tense a little out of habit but he'll settle a lot faster than he used to because it's jeremy. his hand feels a little numb where it's curled over jeremy's hip and jean doesn't remember doing it but he's a little afraid to move it in case it wakes jeremy up but also if he does move he might just hold onto him tighter and he's afraid of what that might make him feel as well. but then jeremy wakes and shifts and stretches and he nudges jean by accident and freezes for a second because it's just as new for him too. jean will feel jeremy hesitate and then his hand really will tighten of its own accord to reassure jeremy to stay where he is. that it's okay. that he wants him there. and then jean will nudge his forehead against the ruffle of hair at the back of jeremy's skull and jeremy will relax into it and they'll stay like that for a while.
then they'll try it facing each other, legs tangled and foreheads pressed together until one day jean realises he wants more. there's too much distance so he pulls a sleepy jeremy closer and by this point they're so much better with it that jeremy doesn't stiffen or startle he just sinks into jean's chest like he's meant to be there. they barely move or shuffle around that night just content and deeply rested together that way.
then finally one night jean will get into bed and jeremy will already be laying down and jean will hesitate bc he's been thinking about it a lot. jeremy hugs him from behind so often these days and jean used to get skittish from it but now he's never felt safer than when jeremy's at his back. and he thinks and thinks and thinks and realises he wants to feel like that in bed too. he wants jeremy to hold him. so jean will lie down facing away from jeremy but he'll reach back and drag his arm over until it's settled over his chest and jeremy's will slowly inch closer but not too close. but then jean will whisper his name just a simple sleepy "jeremy" bc he's already feeling so content and relaxed. and jeremy will get it. he'll understand and he'll press close and kiss jean's shoulder blade and thumb over his chest where his heart is and hold him like he's the only thing that matters. and well once they get there, they don't ever go back.
