#theleftoversedit

Have you been noticing that I've been... kind of losing my mind?

Help me get the tape off.

Nobody's ready to feel better. They're ready to fucking explode.

THE LEFTOVERS Carrie Coon as Nora Durst

Dear Kevin,

I need to say goodbye to someone I care about, someone who's still here, so I'm saying it to you. You were good to me Kevin, and sometimes when we were together, I remembered who I used to be before everything changed, but I was pretending. Pretending as if I hadn't lost everything. I want to believe it can all go back to the way it was, I want to believe I'm not surrounded by the abandoned ruin of a dead civilization, I want to believe it's still possible to get close to someone. But it's easier not to. It's easier because I'm a coward and I couldn't take the pain, not again. I know that's not fair, Kevin. You've lost so much too, and you're strong. You're still here. But I can't be, not anymore. I tried to get better, Kevin. I didn't want to feel this way, so I took a shortcut. But it led me right back home. And do you know what I found when I got there? I found them, Kevin, right where I left them. Right where they left me. It took me three years to accept the truth, but now I know there's no going back, no fixing it. I'm beyond repair. Maybe we're all beyond repair. I can't go on the way I'm living, but I don't have the power to die. But I have to move towards something. Anything. I'm not sure where I'm going, just away. Away from all this. I think about a place where nobody will know what happened to me, but then I worry I'll forget them, but I don't want to ever forget them, I can't. They were my family. I think I loved you, Kevin, and maybe you loved me too. I wish I could say this to you instead of writing it, I wish I could see you one last time to thank you and wish you well, and tell you how much you mean to me, but I can't. Like I said, I'm a coward. So, wish me luck, I think I'm going to need it.

Love, Nora.