→ a/n: happy valentines week to everyone ♡ make sure to treat yourself to something delicious and stay hydrated! ♡
here's the masterlist to the event ^^
enjoy!♡
──── ⋆˚࿔ sangyeon
"let me know what you need,alright?" says sangyeon the minute he sees you breaking down in his arms. your cycle most of the time lines up with his workdays, thankfully (or not so) not having normally sangyeon with you to see how you can act when you have your period. but now, of all days, when you have the worst hormonal feelings he has a day off and naturally wants to spend it with you. sangyeon always makes sure you tell him what you need, either if you crave something or you want peace and alone time. he can give you all that, and he makes sure you know it.
──── ⋆˚࿔ jacob
holding hands in a stressful situation is something jacob needs. whether if it's happening to him, or you. you have some kind of a procedure by any chance? he's right there with you, caressing the skin on your hands to calm you and himself down. he has to perform somewhere new? he knows you'll be wainting for him at the waiting rooms just to be together with him before concerts and holding hands. hours later after holding your hands, he can often still feel your perfume which you put on your wrists that you know he loves, bombarding you with texts to let you know he's much calmer and relaxed because of you. "thank you love,you always know how to help me out."
──── ⋆˚࿔ younghoon
patching up the other while being sick is something younghoon never thought would do. until you came into the picture. you are his sweetheart, he would basically do anything for you, so when he sees you getting pale from day to day it's like a "maternal instinct" clicks inside him and rushes to help you. he cooks for you (or rather orders food) and makes you soup so he can see you get your color back, preparing you warm baths when he sees you shiver even though the tempeture in the room is perfect. "it's okay honey, I'll take care of you, whatever you need."
──── ⋆˚࿔ jaehyun
"this reminded me of you" sends the text jaehyun, and proceeds to attach a picture of a small shared memory you two made throughout your relationship. from time to time, when he's away on tour or on a concert where you couldn't go with, he always makes sure he texts you about every silly little things he sees around the city he is in. he often buys that for you of course, only asking you if he should buy it when he's not sure if you already have one. the next thing you know is that he sends you a bunch of different pictures with the mentioned treasure, some of them even has a member trolling into the picture, but he always makes sure to add a small - "i can't wait to give it to you already. i even sprayed it with my perfume!" which makes you chuckle as you continue your day until he arrives back home.
──── ⋆˚࿔ juyeon
people ofthen say they don't like bringing work home. it's different with juyeon, the main dancer he is he likes to grab any opportunity to dance around your shared appartment in a candle lit afternoon. the dates he arranges are normally go like this: he buys all the ingredients needed, and goes home to you so you can make dinner together. it makes your heart soar when juyeon suddenly softly grabs your small hands into his and pulls you closer to him, the music in the backround matching perfectly with his boyish smile as he looks down at you.
──── ⋆˚࿔ kevin
all you need from kevin is "tell me about your day" and you are starting a long and deep conversation about everything and anything. you don't mind, because when that happens kevin usually lays against the couch and has you in his arms, caressing your back and arms to let you know he's listening carefully. ocasionally hums between your rambling to say his opinion about things, or just simply swipes the hair out of your face that always makes you blushed and shy form his instensive love. "go on, i wanna hear all about it."
──── ⋆˚࿔ chanhee
chanhee often clings to his phone in a kind of way to escape the world around him. escpecially when he's away on tour, he feels like he needs to be on his screen 24/7 to distract his nervous mind. it always helped him before, but since you two started dating the only thing that helps him is if he can hear your voice. there are times when he only asks you to send a quick voice message and tell about your day, but it helpes him more when theres time for a quick call. the minute he hears your voice it hits him like a truck, all of his worries disappearing like magic at your soothing voice, focusing only on you until he hears his manager call out for him to go. "i have to go now, but i promise I'll call you the second 'Im down. i love you."
──── ⋆˚࿔ changmin
changmin is a very attentive boyfriend. he always watches out for you wherever you go, checks your makeup and hair if you ask him to. when he asks you to go on a day on his day off makes you so excited that you immediately sit down to your vanity and start doing your makeup. dolling yourself up prettily, grabbing a dress you have been keeping for a while for a small occasion like this. it all came together, except your jewerly. it's like changmin felt your distress, appeared in your shared room to give you a small gift before going. your breath catches in your throat when you see a beautiful necklace laying in the small box, finishing your look perfectly. withouth saying any word to changmin, you take the necklace and put it on to decorate your neck, smiling wildly as you turn around to him. "what do you think?" is all you say, expecting him to shower you with compliments but he only smiles and steps closer to you. "it suits you perfectly, angel." changmin says, his slender fingers fixing the chain on your skin as he presses a kiss on your nose.
──── ⋆˚࿔ juhaknyeon
haknyeon always does the chores you don't like doing. it's very simple to live together with him, and you are so happy that without mentioning anything, he does the part of the chores you hate. he just feels so grateful to you all the time, that he wants to help you out in different and many things. and when you two started dating, there were times when he watched you attentively to know what you like and don't. the first time you saw him doing the chores you thought you were so lucky to have a boyfriend like him who likes doing the chores which you doesn't. but after many times, you saw him doing it over and over again. and when you asked about it? he only pressed a kiss to your lips and patted your head, saying - "it's okay, i do it happily. i know you don't like it, so I'll do it for you."
──── ⋆˚࿔ sunwoo
one thing about sunwoo is that he's not lovey-dovey. even if you've been together for long, you don't catch him being head ver heels for you. at least not publicly. he is in love with you, so much that sometimes he just can't express it. that's why he does little things to let you know he cares about you and loves you. sending you good morning/night texts everyday even if he's at practice,making sure that you ate already or if not, he's ordering you food to your location. but when thing that cought your heart in a twist, is when you saw how your name is saved in his phone. "how can you be so cute, sunwoo?" he hears you shout out from the living room, his plan working out as he's smiling to himself at the thought of seeing your name in his phone. "my better half"
──── ⋆˚࿔ eric
telling something sad to eric is a tough call. it's either you being all sad about something and you cry,or a total chaos. he wants to calm you down, to be there for you, but the minute he hears your problems he breaks down too. you do love feeling his arms craddling you to makes sure you feel safe, but when you feel his shoulders shaking from his crying, you just can't help but sniff and look up at him. "I'm sorry baby, i just can't bare to see you being sad like this." says eric while wiping your tears, his eyes still desperately searching for yours to calm you down. but then after seeing you watching him so closely, he can't help but laugh at himself, you eventually joining him as you both laugh away the pain together.
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You’re Kevin’s mate. But you also happen to be his best friend.
Genre: werewolf au! friends to lovers! au, fluff
Part One - Part Three
—– PART TWO —–
“Can we talk?”
Enough is enough, surely. You will yourself to open the door to him, to breathe out and try to focus on the task at hand: which is to smooth things over so that you can go back to being exactly what you were all this time.
But as you slowly lift your hand to meet the door handle, you watch it trembling. You drop it to your side. A sigh escapes your lips.
“Y/N?”
It’s been a few days since your boldness had taken over to kiss Kevin smack on the mouth and until now, you have absolutely no idea why you had done such a thing. Honestly, you feel like bashing your head in with a saucepan until logic comes pouring out -- but you’d doubt there’s any logic left. Not when Kevin is concerned.
The thing is, you had acted out of sheer impulse. Not realized that you were still on the teetering edge of falling in love with the man you’d claimed to be your best friend all this time.
“And what’s so bad about it?” Marea had asked you when you’d gone for some girl advice. Though it had been due more because of her insistence than your will, “best friends make the best couples. Haven’t you heard that saying before?”
"We’re best friends, but that doesn’t mean we’ll be the best couple,” you’d sniffled out, wanting to kick yourself for how pathetic you sounded, “Kevin might know me, but he doesn’t know all of me.”
“So? That’s for him to enjoy and discover don’t you think? In his own time.” Her hand falls onto your shoulder then. Warm and supportive. Just like her. You wished you could be more like her too. Then maybe Kevin wouldn’t have had so much trouble, “hey Y/N, you don’t have to be perfect for him. You know that right?”
You’re not sure how you feel about that statement. Because Kevin is. He’s perfect in every single way and there is no way in hell that you’re what he needs.
Far from it.
Which is why you’re here, practically barricading yourself in your room with no contact from the outside world whatsoever. You thought it would’ve worked to give you some headspace, and it had.
Until now.
“Y/N,” his voice is muffled, yet so close on the other side of the room, “please. We don’t even have to talk about this, we can just go back to whatever we were--”
“I don’t want that.”
The words slip out of you before you can stop them. Shocked, your hands fly up to your mouth. Shit.
Silence. Then: “What do you mean?”
Squeezing your eyes shut and cursing under your breath, you try to think of how to backtrack on your statement. To no avail.
“I--” your teeth find purchase onto your lower lip, “I guess what I’m saying is that, it’s hard for me to see you...as just a--a friend. And--And I’m okay to see you as someone--someone I could love. Like a--a boyfriend yeah?”
Kevin says nothing, which means he’s listening.
You try to ignore the loud thunderous beats of your heart as you continue.
“But I also don’t want anything to change. And I’m sure it will, if we--if I...Anyway, I don’t know Kev. I need time. Alone. To Think.”
You shouldn’t have been surprised that there is even more silence -- as cold as ice -- suddenly sweeping in like frostbite. Impulsively, your fingers curl into your palms and you press them against the back of the door before closing your eyes.
This is a mess. A mess you shouldn’t have started in the first place.
But human beings are funny like that aren’t they? Wrecking havoc everywhere they went.
"Y/N.”
You wait, holding your breath.
He starts off slow, his voice gentle and soothing, “nothing will change. Not if you don’t want it to. And I know what you mean, about not seeing you as a friend. I feel the same way.”
He takes a deep breath and you can almost feel his restrained emotion. It causes a sob to choke up your throat, “I’ll give you as much time as you need...I’m probably the last person that you want to see right now,” he chuckles, but it’s empty and hollow. And when he mutters the next few words, you hear his words thicken with emotion, “like I said, Y/N. Your call. I’ll have you--I--I’ll have you any way you want me.”
You’re not sure how long you stay frozen up and glued to the door as you hear his footsteps recede down the corridor, down the stairs, until the soft rumbling of a car rolling out of your driveway slowly fades in the night air. It feels like something in your heart is missing, an ache that slowly numbs your chest and spreads through you like wildfire.
Collapsing onto the floor in a heap of confused chaotic emotion, you can’t help but sob into your hands at the amount of pain that your best friend must be going through. You’re the worst, hurting Kevin and still expecting him to understand and to be there. You hate it; the way his voice had croaked out the words as though you’d speared him with an arrow to the heart. You hate it. You hate everything about this.
Most of all, you hate yourself.
-----
“Kevin?”
“Any news?”
Kevin's eyes, dazed and unfocused, rest on the coffee cup atop the table.
How dark. He wonders what you’re doing. How you’re doing.
Are you sleeping well? Eating well? Can you feel his pain grow and his wolf get angrier with every passing second?
He hopes not.
“Kevin!”
The latter’s eyes snap up to Sangyeon’s, startled by his leader’s use of the mind link to call him out, “sorry,” he mumbles behind his coffee, taking a sip and not even realizing that he doesn’t usually drink it black.
Nothing really makes much sense to Kevin these days.
“You’re getting weaker,” Sangyeon takes note of his pack-mate’s eye-bags creating deep dark grooves on his face, the tired lines of his mouth, the pallor of his skin. The alpha nods at the plate of fruit Chanhee had cut up earlier that morning, “at least eat something.”
“I’m not hungry.”
"You need to. Force it down your throat if you have to.” Sangyeon pauses, “or else I’ll do it for you.”
Kevin listens, only after a small moment of hesitation. He starts picking at the grapes, plopping one absentmindedly in his mouth and chewing in slow-motion.
"You spoke to Y/N a few days ago,” Sangyeon ensures that his question is a gentle murmur, “how did it go?”
Still, it feels like a big major slap in the face.
“She--” there’s a huge lump in Kevin’s throat. Suddenly, it’s all too much of an effort to swallow, “she said she needed time. To process things.”
A small bout of silence.
“And how are you?”
Kevin wants to laugh. How is he? Sangyeon knows the answer to that question without any verbal confirmation of his part. It’s clear that he’s slowly but surely losing his mind, running in circles trying to figure out what exactly could he have done differently so that he wouldn’t be now standing at this great impasse with nowhere and no one to turn to.
“You know,” Sangyeon pipes up then, “I don’t think I told you this, because our pack hadn’t really been that established yet. But when I first marked on Marea, she wouldn’t-- couldn’t look at me in the eye.”
Kevin’s hands curled into fists atop the table, waiting for his leader to continue.
“It was so hard to even get her to talk to me. She was so embarrassed, so overwhelmed by everything that at some point all she wanted was for me to leave her alone,” Sangyeon lets out a small laugh, “thinking about it now, I see the similarities.”
“What...did you do?”
“I couldn’t do anything. It wasn’t up to me, It was her choice,” Sangyeon can’t help but smile down at the table, before looking back up at Kevin, “so I just had to wait. Be patient. And you know what? She came back for me. When it was time for her to.”
“But that’s just the mate bond talking isn’t it?” Kevin asks emptily. He doesn’t want that, not if it’s not out of your own personal desire to see him. He wants absolutely nothing to do with the marking, for he knows for certain that it will merely tick you off even more, disgust you to the moon and back.
“Just because you got marked onto her doesn’t mean you have to fight the feeling.”
"But then that means the feelings aren’t mine.”
“Of course they are!” Sangyeon’s hand comes to a rest upon his shoulder then, providing him with a comforting squeeze, “Kevin, there’s a reason why you chose to mark her. If you had had a better match -- if your heart had decided otherwise-- then you would’ve gone for someone else. It’s not just the mark talking. It’s your heart, it’s your wolf. Don’t you trust your wolf?”
Kevin’s shoulders slump, choking on a soft laugh, “I don’t even know what to think anymore.”
His leader’s words hold some truth, that much the dark-haired wolf is certain. Still, he’d rather wait it out and let you process the situation at your own pace. It would do no one any good for him to be in your face when all you want is to think.
And he understands your struggle, for how can you spend most of your life with a precious friend, only to find out that they are the one that your heart may be seeking for?
He’ll have to wait and see.
-----
"Am I interrupting?”
To say that Kevin is shocked at the sound of your familiar soprano flowing through the front door is an understatement. His wolf yaps in excitement and he’s quick to duck against the kitchen counter top, salad bowl still in his hands and heart pounding like he’d just ran ten miles.
“Y/N! I knew you’d come! I know someone is excited to see you,” Kevin hears the teasing in Soa’s voice, a frown scrunching up his eyebrows at the thought of her going behind his back to invite you to their Christmas Dinner. What would you think of him now? That he’s just a pathetic, lousy, petty idiot who hadn’t wanted to invite you merely because of some stupid feelings.
Great.
“I am!” Eric is quick to bound down the stairs. Kevin tilts his head just enough to see his pack member’s arms wrap around you, lifting you up in the air as you squeal. He tries not to growl, but the rumble is heard softly in his chest, like a distant thrum.
On the other side of the counter -- facing him -- stands a very entertained Changmin, who folds his arms and flashes him a wicked grin, “you might want to get your woman, Kevin hyung. She’s got quite a few eager fans.”
“Shut up,” Kevin mutters, glad that more wolves have come to greet you as the noise provides a great distraction. As if on impulse, his hold on the salad bowl tightens, knuckles turning white.
“Is Kevin here?” you ask all too innocently and Kevin almost yelps at how close you sound. After days of not smelling you, not feeling your presence radiate next to him -- it’s a struggle even out his breaths for fear he might just bounce if you stand a little too close.
“Kev hyung,” Changmin kicks at him playfully, “don’t you know it’s rude to make a girl wait?”
"Let me help out with that Y/N,” Eric says and before Kevin can make a bolt for the back door, he is yanked up from behind the counter, wide, horrified eyes gaping at you like a deer in the headlights.
Oh my god. Kill me now, he thinks.
He doesn’t meet your eye. He can’t, even when your smell permeates his nostrils -- you smell of flowers and freshness and something that resembles the aftertaste of rain -- even when he feels the warmth of your heart beating in sync with his, picking up pace. Whether in panic or in excitement, he doesn’t know.
"Fashionably late Y/N, I like it,” Hyunjae joins in by poking his head through the doorway with a grin, “can we eat? I’m starving.”
As the wolves blunder through the kitchen to the back of the house, Kevin quickly darts around them with an excuse that the salad needs a little more seasoning, lingering by the kitchen doorway until Soa had managed to pry your peace offering of wine and beer from your hands. Jacob’s mate doesn’t fail to send him a wink as she goes through the door, leaving him with no choice but to finally, finally look up at your face --in your eyes.
He swears he almost loses it.
Deep down in his belly, his wolf lets out an appreciating growl.
Shut it now, boy.
He looks at you. You look back. Unspoken words hang in the air.
“Hey,” you say to break the ice, no doubt.
Kevin swallows hard, “hey.”
“long time no see, huh?”
“...yeah.”
Another pause where Kevin’s thoughts reel. What should he say? What should he do?
Why did you come? Why are you here?
“I--” you must’ve read the expression on his face, hand going up to touch your ear. A habit of yours whenever you get nervous, “Soa invited me, so I thought...I thought it would be nice. To see you as well. And the boys. Haven’t seen them in a while.”
“Yeah,” his throat feels dry with all the questions dying along his tongue. But he knows that pressing you is not what you need. Not right now anyway. So he settles the salad bowl on the counter and tries to lighten the mood, “seems you made their day. Eric wouldn't stop yapping the entire day."
It’s a miracle that you laugh and bloody hell, his heart is about to burst. What a beautiful sound, “well, I hope I made more than just Eric's day."
Is this...is this what they call flirting? You're just grinning up at him and Kevin might have understood the slight intonation of your voice to say exactly what you'd meant. But again, jumping ships too soon would only result in heartbreak and misunderstandings.
So he grins softly, glad that you seem like yourself. It's like he has his friend back, "wouldn't you like to know."
As the evening wears on and the sun falls away into the horizon, Kevin finds himself relaxing, muscle by muscle, letting go of all the weight and the tension in his shoulders and allowing himself to be soothed by the excited broil of chatter around him. It fills his heart with warmth, the way you seem to get on with every single one of his packmates, and the more time goes by, the easier it is to slip back into the friendship that he's so used to with you.
"That one time he had to bunk, we got caught in the janitor's closet," you are recalling your highschool senior days. Kevin remembers admitting that he'd never bunked a class before, hence the reason for your story, "and Kev, Kev was practically wetting his pants when we got into the Principal's office."
"Kevin! Honor student material?" Gasps echo around the table and you can`t help but fall back with laughter at the boys` horrified faces.
"You never told us this!" Sangyeon's tone turns slightly accusatory.
"We didn't get detention, if that makes it better," Kevin grins bashfully, "and! We got off easy because of my honor student reputation, might I add."
"Oh please, the principal took one look at you and he knew he wouldn't be able to do much," you slap his back playfully and he scowls in response, "you were panicking too! How come you don't tell them about reciting prayers underneath your breath?"
"Oh my gosh," Marea is wiping tears off her face at this point, "this is hilarious."
"How come you guys never told us all of this before?" Eric says, leaning over the table with a wicked grin. It matches Sunwoo's, who is right opposite him, "Y/N, I would've befriended anyone who got Kevin to get on his wild side."
"Oh but he'd never do that with just anyone," you waggle a finger at him, "only me."
The entire table 'ooohs' and 'aaahs' before you realize the significance of your statement. Just like a bright peach, your face flushes with colour, heart picking up speed.
"You deserve it," Kevin mutters so softly you barely would'vw caught it if not for him leaning in close.
"Shut up. I didn't think they'd take it that way!" You snap back.
"They'll take everything you say that way, sweetheart."
"Don't call me that."
"Oh?" Kevin's brow quirks up in amusement, "what do you want me to call you then? Love? Baby?"
"Sh--Shut up."
He bursts out laughing and after some hesitation, you join in. And at this moment, nothing feels more right than the two of you, sharing inside jokes and bantering just like you've always been doing all this time.
Kevin wonders whether you feel it too, the slight squeeze of butterflies tickling his ribs. Wonders whether your eyes find his more often, as his does.
Probably not.
Unfortunately, that intimate moment breaks up the moment the girls start clamouring for the plates and making a fuss out of cleaning everything before they'll settle for a Christmas movie. That's enough to pop Kevin's bubble, who instantly finds an excuse to get away from you when memories of your last private conversation comes rushing back like salt in his wounds.
Hope is what he fears. Hope is dangerous, gives him all sorts of ideas.
But at the dinner table just then, you'd been comfortable. Enjoying yourself even. Happy.
He hasn't seen you this happy in so long. Not around him.
Kevin, focus!
He should've known he'd find himself squashed to your side on one of the gigantic pillows when the movie rolls around, considering there barely is any space to fit all of them. And no way is he entertaining the thought of you getting squished into someone else.
"Sorry," he mumbles, back to being his awkward self. Well, it doesn't help that you are barely a hair'a breath away and that your scent is overwhelming his every thought, "you okay?"
"Y--Yeah." Glancing at you to confirm your words, he takes note of the slight space -- limited space -- between you and him. His eyes sweep back to the screen.
"Hey."
Your hands tug onto his shirt sleeve and Kevin turns, "hm?"
"You--" your orbs are downcast, averted gaze zeroed in on the faded sofa material, "you can come closer...if you w--want."
Kevin's heart soars.
Gently, and with much more hesitance than needed, the said dark-haired wolf shifts until his shoulder presses against yours. You throw your blanket over his lap as a friendly gift and his lips twitches into a side smile. Old habits die hard, after all.
Now that he’s closer, he identifies your scent; comparable to a field of lilacs. It relaxes him, soothes his muscles, and it doesn’t help that you’re so close he can feel your skin pressed against his own with only the thin material of your clothing to separate you.
In the corner of his mind, his wolf lets out a pained whimper. It had admittedly been waiting for so long to have you around within physical distance. And now that you’re here, it’s as if every single moment with you is heightened.
Don’t be a creep, is what he keeps reminding himself as he tears his eyes away from you to focus on the tv screen, Don’t. Be. A. Creep.
Easier said than done.
The movie is barely ten minutes in and already Kevin feels lightheaded from such an extended amount of contact. So much so that he has to excuse himself -- he tries to avoid the confused look you throw him -- and stumbles into the backyard porch for some fresh air.
It’s crazy, now that he thinks about it. How important you are to him. Those few days without you had really amped up his senses, which makes sense, considering that the further away a mate is, the stronger the wolf seeks it out.
And god knows how deprived his wolf is at the moment.
Steadying his hands onto the wooden railing, Kevin breaths in a deep, shaky breath. Releases it soon after. Around him, the buzzing of cicadas help to distract his thoughts.
Not for long though. He hears the rhythm of your shoes against the floor, getting closer and closer to him and on instinct, his muscles tense up.
"You okay Kev?”
He forces down the groan upon hearing his name fall from your lips, focuses on breathing in steadily, as he replies, “Yeah yeah. Fine.”
“Are you...feeling sick or something?” you move a little closer, unknown to the way Kevin’s mind practically screams at you to get away. God knows what he could do in such a situation.
“N-No, nothing like that--”
“Tell me you didn’t eat the eggplant that was in the salad.”
“Wha--No.”
“Just checking. You have a bad habit of just shoving things into your mouth and last time you ate an eggplant your face blew up ten times its size,” you snicker and he feels you at his side then, closer. Too close, “not the greatest look on you.”
Too close. Too close. Too fucking close.
“Kevin,” he’s so caught up in his own head, battling his own demons, that he doesn’t realize he’s leaning away from you out of fear until he finds your frown alighted by the soft shine of the moon, “please tell me what’s wrong.”
“Nothing,” he looks away, forces his body to go still because damnit! For once you’re approaching him without restraint and all he does is screw it up!
“Kev--”
“I said it’s nothing, Y/N.”
He answers a little too quickly, a little too abruptly, that he feels like kicking himself when hurt flashes across your face. But just when he thinks you’re about to storm away, a hand reaches up to his jaw, tilting it to the side and down to face your stubborn gaze filled with concern.
“You were fine during dinner,” your murmur is laced with pain that causes Kevin’s own heart to swell, “why...why are you acting like this?”
Kevin says nothing, for fear of hurting your feelings even further. It doesn’t help when he notices the way your lower lip trembles, as if to keep all your emotions in check.
What you say next almost knocks him over with shock.
“Do you...not want me anymore?”
Kevin gapes at you. You gaze back. And then, as if ashamed, your brown orbs slide down to the ground.
Abruptly, your hand drops from his face, “nevermind,” you try to force out a laugh, though it does little now that Kevin’s brain is in havoc, “forget I said anything--”
“No no no,” Kevin’s hand reaches out to grab your forearm before you can fully turn away, probably due to the pool of tears gathering in your eyes and he swears he feels his chest constrict at the sight. It physically hurts to see you like this; So scared, vulnerable, as though you might fall apart under his grip.
“I’m sorry,” his eyes try to find yours, one hand going to cup your cheek when you're adamantly avoiding him, “Y/N. Look at me? Please?”
“Why?” your eyes are flickering right and left, an action that he would’ve found cute, if not for the situation he has to make right. Like, right now.
“Just because. Come on,” his other hand wounds around your waist to pull you closer, trying not to purr in satisfaction at the closeness of your two bodies in favour of wiping the hurt off your face, “hey, you did nothing wrong. That has nothing to do with you--”
“Then why are you acting like that?” you can’t help but blurt out.
He winces. You do have a point. He’s been acting like a douche, constantly pulling away when it strains against his heart’s desire.
In truth, Kevin has no idea where you two currently stand and to say that it’s driving him crazy is an understatement.
“Because,” he starts off, before pressing his lips together. Arms suddenly dropping from your frame as he steps back, Kevin continues in a stammer, “because I’m an idiot. That’s right--I-- I thought you needed space. And I didn’t want to hurt you,” your eyes are widening with every word spilling from his mouth and Kevin hurries on before he loses his confidence. The words come out in a rush, “and I--I struggle to keep myself in check whenever I’m with you because I don’t want to do something that’ll scare you off so I try not to think about holding you all the time and fuck, Y/N, it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done--”
“Wait, hold on,” you hold up your hand to him, eyes searching his own now and him trying to avoid yours, “you--you don’t want to scare me off...What? Why would you scare me off?”
“You said it yourself,” Kevin says wearily, “you needed time. To think.”
“Yes, and what good did that do,” you mutter. You step forward to grab his arms then, beautiful dark eyes looking up at him and reflecting the light of the moon and by god, Kevin wishes he can just kiss your next breath away.
Instead, his hands coil into fists at his sides.
“Look, If anything. I’m sorry,” you chuckle half-heartedly, “I pushed you away and then expected you to wait for me with open arms,” you pause, then whisper out once more, “I’m sorry, Kev--”
Your words die in a small yelp as the said wolf’s arms whip out to pull you inevitably close to his chest, eyes fluttering up to meet his as your noses bump softly. Kevin stares down at the details of your face, heart filling up with a colony of butterflies knowing that this-- this moment -- is his and his only. Goosebumps run up his spine and at the back of his mind, he can hear the excited yapping of his wolf.
Your words are replaying over and over in his head and for once, Kevin lets go of all self-restraint. He lets out a soft exhale and allows one of his hands to slip up your neck, cradling your cheek in his palm.
Your lips part in a silent breath and he can’t help but glance down at the pink peony that seems to be calling out to him, like a moth drawn to a flame.
Slow. Take it slow, boy.
So he dips his head down to your neck to nuzzle underneath your jaw, drunk upon the very essence that is you as he feels you start to tremble in his arms.
“You okay?” he whispers, still cocooned in the crook of your neck. Ever so gently, his lips brush against your skin, causing you to jolt in surprise.
“Y-Yeah,” he hears you gasp out, noticing how your hands have curled over the material of his sweater, like kitten paws on his chest.
Despite your affirmation, your stuttering heartbeats are what give you away, and that makes him smile. And maybe it’s out of pure impulse, maybe it’s because he just loves seeing you all red and flustered in his arms -- that he allows his lips to press the softest of kisses at your pulse point.
You take a sharp inhale and Kevin waits for you to pull away.
But you don’t. Instead, your head seems to fall to the side, your body releasing a soft sigh just like a flower opening herself up to him. Taking it as green light, the dark-haired wolf proceeds to pepper a rain of kisses along your neck up to your jawline, causing you to squeak in surprise.
“Sorry,” comes Kevin’s immediate response. He pulls away, only to have you hold on tighter, “no no! Uhm I--that’s--just took me by surprise. Is all.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
He can’t help it. He bursts into soft chuckles as you face him with a glare, “what’s so funny?”
“Nothing,” the grin on his face is permanent, hands sliding down to your waist before he presses another series of kisses in the crook of your neck, “Wasn’t expecting you to be the jumpy type.”
"What were you expecting?” you shiver, trying not to give him the reaction that he wants (though you have to admit his kisses are heavenly) “that I was a full-on bitch with a big-ass libido?”
“Maybe? With your boyfriend, probably--ow! Okay okay, clearly I was wrong,” Kevin ducks just in time to avoid another smack on the back of his head, though the grin on his face is threatening to become permanent at this rate, “definitely no big-ass libido, I get it.”
“You learn new things everyday,” you mutter before throwing him a pointed glance, “well I, for one, didn’t take you for a thinker. Thought you were more of a do-er.”
"I think a lot.”
“Yeah but I thought you were more of a ‘follow-your-heart type of guy.”
“Well,” Kevin's face flushes with embarrassment. He looks away from you, clearing his throat like he always does when he’s nervous, “it’s you...Of course I’d overthink.”
That does nothing to help your heart. It practically jumps through your chest and you feel like you can’t breathe as you stare up at this young man whom you hadn’t seen - really seen - all this time.
“Where have you been?” you don’t realize you’ve said those words out loud until Kevin lets out a soft laugh. Heat travels to the back of your neck, spreading to your cheeks when the dark-haired man pecks the underside of your jaw in affection, “I’ve always been right here.”
“No. I mean: why did I never see you before?” you murmur. That causes him to pull back, gazes locking with such intimacy that it makes you shiver with goosebumps.
Kevin merely smiles down at you, reaching his hand up to boop your nose gently, “like I said, I’ve always been right here.”
If only you can stay in his arms like this forever. You’d do anything for this moment to last and yet, when the wind starts picking up speed, Kevin gently prods you back into the house, murmuring that the last thing he wants is for you to get sick.
The movie is over by the time you make it back and your wolf urges you into the shower, handing you some of his smaller clothes while he jogs back down to fetch some hot chocolate from the kitchen. When you’re out and freshly washed, a towel around your neck, you’re more than surprised to find him already in his pj’s. He looks as warm as you do.
“You’re not gonna take a shower?” you ask as you settle beside him on the bed. Kevin shifts up into a sitting position, handing you your hot chocolate from his nightstand.
“Nah. I don’t get cold that easily,” he grins.
“Is this why you never wear scarves?” the realization is a slap in the face, “Oh my gosh! And you never wore hats either. I knew it was weird but I always thought it was just because you were prioritizing fashion over comfort.”
“What?” he lets out a small scoff, “god no. I get too hot when I put on a scarf. You’d be surprised how warm we are.”
“Lucky,” you mutter while taking a sip of your hot chocolate. The sweetness zaps right down to your toes and you hum in delight.
It surprises you, how easily you switch between that semblance of friendship to something a little more. Admittedly, you feel a little weirded out that your best friend since six grade makes your heart flutter and your hands go all sweaty with embarrassment. But it’s a good kind of weird, one that you’re ready to embrace even though you still feel like you’re a doe walking on thin ice with trembling limbs.
As you fall asleep that night -- Kevin has finally agreed to share the bed, albeit reluctantly -- you allow yourself to get wrapped up in your wolf’s arms despite him asking you a million times over if “this was okay.” So much so that you almost want to him him in the face for being too considerate.
But you only bark out snarkily, “you literally kissed your way down my neck and you’re asking me if you can hold me? Really?”
“Jeez, I was trying to be respectful, ” Kevin grumbles underneath his breath, arms circling your middle to pull you close until his nose buries itself in your hair.
You laugh upon hearing the pout in his voice. Kevin follows soon after and for the first time since you've got to know about the marking, you feel completely and utterly at peace in this little bubble of slow-growing happiness.
"You'll want to get some sleep," Kevin's voice ghosts along your temple, causing you to shiver slightly. He tightens is hold in response, one of his hands grazing the side of your hip, "Marea is an early bird, which means the whole house is up at seven."
"Why?"
"Oh I don't know. She lived on a farm all her life so sleeping in doesn't seem right to her," Kevin's lips brush along the side of your head and warmth pools inside your stomach when he leaves a lingering kiss there, "and we all usually do a lap around the perimeter just as a safety precaution."
"I never got to see your wolf."
He chuckles, thumb rubbing circles over your hipbone, " s'not that special. But I can show you. Heads up, but I'm a hot wolf."
"Sure you are," you can't help but roll your eyes as you turn to get more comfortable in his embrace, before your eyes slip shut. Your body relaxes almost instantly when Kevin's scent fills your nose, "night Kev."
"Goodnight, Y/N."
It's probably the first time you two sleep so soundly.
-----
"So let me get this straight. You two...haven't kissed?"
"Shh!" You're quick to whack Soa with one of the damp bedsheets that you're about to hang up on the clothing line, eyes darting back and forth to make sure no wolf is in close proximity, "I didn't tell you so that you could tell the entire neighbourhood!"
"Sorry sorry," she throws her hands up in apology, "but it threw me off! It's been...what? A week now? We're into the new year and he still hasn't made a move?"
"No," you can't help your shoulders from slumping as you pull the sheet over the line in hopes that it proves a mighty distraction. Admitting it hurts your chest a little, "I don't know. I can't read him. It's not like he doesn't do anything--"
"What does he do?"
"Well," you try hard not to let the heat gather at the back of your neck as you bend down for another bedsheet, "he...he holds my hand. And we hug...a lot."
"And?"
"...and he--he kisses me on the forehead...and on...on my neck, sometimes..." your words trail off in a mumble and you don't realize your hands are curling onto the sheets as if holding on for dear life until Soa's hands reach up to grip yours.
You look up at her then, at the determined look on her face, "then I think he's just waiting for you," Soa responds gently.
"W-Waiting?"
"Yup!" She pops her 'p', grabs the bedsheet from your hands and throws it over the clothing line as she continues, "I think he's just waiting for you to be comfortable with it. My guess, he's just scared you wouldn't want to after what happened last time."
Just the memory of your impromptu kiss has you groaning and burying your face into your hands, "don't remind me."
"You, my friend, need to step up your game," all finished, Soa sweeps the laundry basket in her arms as you follow her through the backdoor, "you need to let him know that you want to be kissed."
"How the hell do I do that?" You mutter.
Another familiar voice joins in, causing you to yelp out in shock, "who wants to be kissed?"
"Oh my gosh-- Hyunjae!" You screech out in panic and stumble back against the wall, "wha-- are you eavesdropping?"
“Oh please. I have better things to do,” he scoffs while joining you on your way to the kitchen, sweeping the empty basket out of Soa’s hands in the process, “so what’s all this about wanting to be kissed?”
“Maybe you can help give your perspective,” Soa chimes in before you have the chance to protest, “Y/N has a ...kind of a situation.”
Your cheeks are flaming and you turn away, eyes quickly scanning the area and sighing in relief in realization that the other wolves are out doing their morning runs. God knows what would happen if anyone else catches wind of this.
"If it helps, anything that is said here--” Hyunjae motions between the three of you, “will leave this place.”
Letting out a soft sigh as you reach the kitchen, you settle yourself on one of the bar stools and wait until Hyunjae and Soa do the same. Then, in a soft murmur, you recount the small incident and the predicament in which you’ve found yourself in at this point, hoping that you don’t burn a whole through the floor.
“Soa’s right,” Hyunjae says as you trail off, face flaming fire engine red, “Kevin is waiting for you. And knowing him, he’s all too considerate to even dare do anything until he gets a real green light. You know what I mean?”
“That’s what I said,” Soa adds.
“What does that even mean?” you mumble. Hell. How did they talk about this as if they’re merely talking about the weather? You’ve barely said anything and your heart is skipping beats like it’s skipping a rope.
“Communication is key,” Soa states.
"That you should make a move,” Hyunjae’s lips dance up into a playful smirk, "You should just tell him that you want to be kissed. Let him know what you want.”
“I--” your brain feels heavy from the idea of you having to tell Kevin that you want to be kissed. Just the thought of this situation and the million of ways in which it can go wrong overwhelms you, heart lurching up through your throat and burning you up with such intensity that your body crouches against the kitchen counter, your knuckles white as you grip the corner.
“Y/N, you okay?” Hyunjae's hand lands on your arm, though he sounds far away. Too far away, “Hey--”
A growl cuts him off and before you can register what’s happening, familiar warmth surrounds you as rough palms cup your cheeks so that you come face to face with none other than your said wolf. He’s speaking, saying words that sound distorted amidst the thundering beats of your heart, the rush of blood through your ears and it takes you every inch of your self-control to reign yourself back to attention.
“--alright, Y/N? Can you hear me?” Kevin’s voice is like a breathe of fresh air and you gasp out, only to have him redirect your eyes to his dark pupils, “hey, it’s okay. It’s okay. Breathe with me.”
It feels like eternity before your body finally slows down and out of relief, you can’t help but sag into Kevin’s chest. Naked chest. What the--
“What--” Kevin’s growl is filled with silent, seething rage, “--did you do?”
“Nothing. We were just talking and --” Hyunjae tries to stammer out despite Kevin’s hard glare, “I’m sorry, Y/N--”
“Not--” you breathe out against Kevin’s chest, “--your fault.”
The rest of the wolves have piled into the kitchen at this point in a crowd of confusion and concern, Jacob at the forefront as he quickly slides up to his mate to ask, “you alright love? What’s going on?”
“We were talking. Everything was fine before Y/N--”
“Well she’s not fine now, is she?” Kevin snaps before Soa can finish her sentence, chest rumbling with another growl as Jacob’s nostrils flare in turn, “what did you tell her?”
It’s extravagant. Overdramatic. But you don’t have enough energy to bring Kevin back to his place and you’re glad when Sangyeon finally steps in between the trip of wolves with his hands out in a surrendering gesture.
“Alright. That’s enough,” he looks at Kevin, “Kevin. Go cool off. Now.”
Kevin merely snarls in response. Sangyeon snarls right back, eyes flashing with the power only an alpha possesses, “Now, Kevin.”
He doesn’t need to be told twice. Scooping you up against his chest before he silently bounds up the stairs two at a time, you take this moment to bury yourself closer to him in an attempt to appear smaller, intimated by the show of anger that had jut occurred a few moments ago. In any other situation, you would’ve been flattered by how protective Kevin had been. But you’d never seen this side of him before, and there’s so much anger. Terror in that simple growl.
It makes your hands tremble just thinking about it.
Kevin surprises you by gently settling you down at the foot of his bed. He turns away swiftly then, but not before you catch his hand.
“Wait. Stay with me,” you manage to mumble out despite not being able to meet his gaze, “please?”
Kevin hesitates for a moment. Then, he sighs and turns back to you, dropping to the floor so that you have no choice but to look at him.
You try really hard not to let your eyes stray further down his neck, down to his defined chest, to his abs--
No no no. Shut up.
“I...” your mouth feels heavy with sand, “I’m sorry.”
Kevin’s eyebrows dip into a frown, “what for?”
Good god. Does he know how attractive he is without a shirt? Your inner mate sighs in bliss.
“For this,” you motion towards the kitchen before your eyes slip down to your now-entwined hands, “it was my fault. Hyunjae and Soa were only trying to help me.”
“Help you with what?"
“With...uhm...”
Say it. Come on. Out with it!
Kevin must’ve noticed your expression, for his face softens as he gives your hand a tender squeeze, “we can talk later--”
“No. No no, I--well, it’s kinda embarrassing to say this.”
Cocking his head to the side, he waits for you to elaborate.
You bite the inside of your cheek as your heart resumes its small gallop, replaying the worfs over and over and over again to make sure that's what you wish to say.
And when you do, your voice is barely above a tiny murmur of jumbled words that even Kevin's keen ears don't catch.
"Come again?" Kevin leans even closer and heat springs through your cheeks.
You mumble it a little louder this time, "they were helping me ask you...why you haven't kissed me yet..."
The stunned silence that prevails makes you wish you hadn't said anything at all and letting out a small meep, your head falls to your chest in an attempt to shy away from Kevin's deep brown eyes.
This is stupid, you think to yourself. You shouldn't even have asked him for such a thing in the first place! What if he thinks you're desperate?
To your surprise, Kevin chuckles.
"Stop laughing," you grumble underneath your breath.
That only makes him laugh even more, "Kevin!"
"Sorry," Kevin puts a hand over his mouth, though he can't hide his smile through the crinkle in his eyes.
Leaning close so that your legs part to allow his head to rest upon your middle, his arms rest on either side of your body, "I wasn't expecting that."
His murmur against your stomach fills you with liquid heat that shoots right to your core and you swear you almost stop breathing as he sighs against you like an appeased wolf.
"Next time, just ask me," Kevin continues as he looks up at you.
"I would've, but as you can see, it's already fucking embarrassing to be in my shoes right now."
He laughs some more, "nothing embarrassing about telling me what you want, Y/N."
"Why are you laughing then?"
"Because," his hand goes up to cup your cheek, "you're cute."
Heat spreads through your tummy. You try to pull out if his grasp, only for him to raise himself on his knees, face inches from yours.
A quick glance to his lips has you inhale a sharp breath. Kevin tilts his head, his nose brushing yours in an intimate, almost tender manner.
It's happening. Finally. After days of dreaming about his lips on yours. You blink in hopes that you're not dreaming, not realizing that Kevin is gazing at you with one of his soft smiles.
"Hey," he murmurs, prodding your nose to snap you back to attention, "I'm gonna kiss you now."
"I figured."
"What kind of response ie that?" He laughs, "How romantic."
"Trying to lighten the mood!"
"That's not the point of me trying to kiss you Y/N."
"Please tell me you can't hear my heart--"
His other arm wraps around your waist, pulls you close as he whispers, "I totally can."
And he kisses you.
Lips parting yours with a gentle sensuality has your toes curl in delight and the sound of surprise you make gets kissed away by Kevin's mouth. He kisses you deeply this time, totally unlike the small peck you'd exchanged earlier, and you all but melt against him with a sigh.
He feels -- and smells -- like heaven. A mixture of boy and nature that you can't quite place. It makes your heart stutter, limbs flushed with heat as Kevin parts your lips only to suckle upon your bottom one. He pulls you closer, instinctively, and your hands wind around his neck to trail up through his hair before you hear a small growl rumble up his chest in satisfaction.
It's only when your back hits the bed that you take note of your wolf leaning over you, parting momentarily to rest his forehead on yours and kissing a spot right at the corner of your mouth.
"You good?" He murmurs throatily. The sound makes you squirm in delight as you nod.
"Anything else you want to ask me?" He asks softly as his hand caresses your cheekbone. The other one starts tracing slow patterns against your hip.
It takes you a moment to pull out of your daze, "n-no, but..." trailing off to take in the firm ridges of muscles of his shoulders, his biceps, down to his abs, your hands take on a life of their own as you trace the light scar on the right side of his stomach.
Kevin shudders above you at the sensation, before catching your palm and leaning down to kiss you some more. You let out a sound between a mewl and a whimper when his tongue darts out, his kiss a little more rough, a little more urgent as you slowly fall apart beneath him.
It's euphoric. As if you're floating on cloud nine, and the more Kevin kisses you, the more you get lost in a delicious head-spinning daze that leaves you gasping against his mouth. Kevin groans back in response, causing warmth to pool into your stomach. Soon enough, you're a mess of limbs and bodies, his chest pressing down against yours as he makes love to your mouth with another throaty growl. You do nothing to discourage him, your nails finding purchase along his back and loving the way his body shivers at the contact.
Time loses meaning, though all you care about at the moment is the way his tongue dances along with yours like it's meant to be. A whine of protest falls from you when he pulls back only to gasp as he nibbles his way along your jaw, down your neck as his hips rock into you.
You gasp out his name and he smirks against your skin, chuckling as he slowly leans away to take in your dishevelled, breathless state. Beautiful.
Mine.
"Well then. That was nice," is the only thing you can manage.
Kevin laughs, "nice? Oh I think there are better words."
"Don't flatter yourself."
Kevin is grinning like a little boy when he leans down again, nose brushing yours and mouth a hair's breath away, "you want me to kiss you again to prove it?"
You flush instantly, "I--No. That's not what I meant."
He giggles, stealing a kiss from your lips and mumbling against your mouth, "cute."
------
Part 3 coming up after that! Thanks for the love and for reading ❤🥰🥺
Haknyeon and you were outside looking at the bright stars in the sky. You were so impressed by the beauty of the sky, and Haknyeon could see it by those admiration eyes that you had. He found it cute how much you adore every little thing in the world.
-"Hakie?" you asked him. He turned his head toward you -"Will you still love me when I'll be an old woman?" you asked him with a pout.
He laughed, then he cupped your face with his hands -"Of course I will love you, no matter what". He brought his head close to yours and came to rub his nose affectionately against yours making you giggled and feel loved.
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You ponder over your mixed feelings for Hyunjae during your shared quad ride.
Genre: fluff! Enemies to lovers au
----
"Faster."
"What?"
"I said faster!"
"I can't!"
"Ugh!" Hyunjae falls back, hands gripping tightly onto the metal bars lining the outer edges of your quad vehicle, "remind me why we're doing this together again?"
"Because you, my dear friend, are as single as a pringle," you shoot back amidst the wild grunts of the quad, "as am I."
It was supposed to be a fun day out with friends, enjoying nature and having fun riding quads, sightseeing and spending the day out in the sun. That quickly turned sour the moment you realized that all of your friends already had their other halves -- nobody had mentioned it was a group date! -- and that, since all single quads were taken up that day, you and Hyunjae were obliged to share a quad.
That regret keeps on piling on the more you ride, what with the said young man constantly berating you for not driving to his liking when you’re supposed to be the one driving.
"Have you never driven a quad before?” he shouts at you from behind, though it’s practically impossible to hear his words against the wind roaring through your ears.
The quads before you are speeding up, cheers and shouts echoing through the air as a gust of dust slaps right into your face and stings your eyes, “no, I haven’t!” You shout back, “so you better not piss me off or I’ll--”
“You’ll what? You won’t be able to do anything at the speed we’re going!”
“Oh shut up! Why did you come if you knew that we’d end up together?!” You snap back in growing irritation. Contrary to you, Hyunjae had known about the seating arrangements well before you did, and it astounds why he’s complaining so much when he had the choice not to show up. What a brat!
“Because you wouldn’t have been able to ride it alone!” he yells out.
Oh. That kind of made sense.
“Then stop complaining!” you yell.
Your quad gives a sudden jolt and you yelp out, thumb slipping on the accelerator in panic as you feel yourself losing control of the vehicle. With actions too quick to comprehend, Hyunjae’s arms circle your frame, gripping the quad handles to keep it steady as he pushes down onto the accelerator.
“This is all your fault!” you bellow, heart still running a hundred miles an hour from the sudden burst of adrenaline pumping through your veins.
“Oh shut up,” his voice is close, practically echoing against your ear. The warmth of his back envelopes you, chest pressing to your back in a way that makes you tense up, “if it weren’t for me, we’d end up in the sugar cane fields.”
He has a point there. Swallowing hard and deciding to stay quiet, you quickly spare a glance in his direction and almost gasp at how close his face is to yours.
He’s kinda cute.
You feel like slapping yourself at such scandalous statements. This is Hyunjae, the guy you’ve always bickered back and forth with ever since you ended up in the same dance class. It’s hard to forget that he’s well sought-out amongst the female population when he’s constantly poking fun at you every second of the day, but looking at him now, you can’t deny that you could spend all the ride marvelling at his features.
“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” comes his snicker. That instantly rips your gaze away with a scowl, “yeah and it might burn my camera in the process.”
He chuckles -- much to your surprise -- and that makes your lips quirk up in a half-smile.
“Look,” he nudges your hand with his and turning your head to follow his line of vision, another gasp falls from your lips as your eyes settle upon the glimmering landscape before you.
Sugarcane fields span out before you, freshly grown and green. Smoke swirls through the air, dust fanning out over your face as the ocean waves welcome you with a roar, its aquamarine waters glimmering in the midday sunshine.
You can taste the salt on your tongue, the coolness of the wind flapping against your face. And Hyunjae’s heat against your body.
This is what it feels like to be free. To be one with the wind and the sun and the sea.
You love it.
Further along the edge of the cliff is where the quads have stopped to admire the view and as your quad comes to a stop behind the last of them, your friends are quick to make fun of you.
“So you decided to stop fighting,” Juyeon smirks, clapping Hyunjae on the back as you trudge up to them, all dirtied and dusted in brown.
“See how well you two look when you’re actually not bickering like cats and dogs,” Chanhee adds with a wink.
“Haha, very funny,” Hyunjae replies with a roll of his eyes, but not before cutting you a glance, one that you don’t fail to miss. Heat creeps up along the back of your neck as you fall into step behind the group, deciding to walk with the girls instead as you try to assimilate the overwhelming tide of emotions suddenly present in your chest.
"Waa look at that!" One of your girlfriends cries out in delight at the tide of waves. She runs up to the cliff edge, arms spread as wide as an eagle as water splashes up the rocks. The rest of the girls busy themselves with taking pictures while you entertain yourself watching the foam build and retreat below.
"Hey Y/N, can you take a picture for me and Jacob?" His girlfriend asks and you're quick to oblige, stomach churning uncomfortably at how cozied up they look. Without embarrassment nor shame.
Heck. You're more uncomfortable than they are.
And thus comes the onset of couple photos, romance shots that get worse as the minutes slip by. By the time the guide asks you all the climb back onto your quad, you curse the heavens for feeling like the biggest third wheeler ever.
"Should make them pay you," Hyunjae's words are accompanied with a smirk as he turns on the engine.
"I'd rather not be witness to their displays of affection," you reply, gripping the quad handles behind you.
"Jealous?"
"Ha, as if!" Your cheeks -- despite your retort -- flood with colour and you're glad that the helmet is shadowing your features.
"Also, you might want to hold on to me."
You snort, "I think I'm good."
"Your loss."
You don't even have time to react as the quad jerks forward, a shriek tearing through your throat as your arms quickly find purchase onto Hyunjae's shirt. The latter cackles evilly as you shoot down the sugarcane field with the wind nipping at your skin and body jolting along the uneven path of rocks.
Bloody hell! Why in the world did he have to drive so fast?!
"I told you to hold on!" His voice is barely audible over the noise and dust.
"Asshole!"
"I'll take that as a compliment!"
You feel like kicking him in the face, for even though you can't see him you're pretty certain that he's grinning that annoyingly obnoxious smile of his.
At least you can enjoy the view, you think grudgingly to yourself as the sugarcane fields zoom by. The ocean is large and deep blue before you, a sea of marine depth sparkling under the heat of summer sunshine. The quads in front are gaining distance, dust rising from their heels and making you cough.
But you're not prepared for Hyunjae's hand suddenly jerking the quad forward to gain speed, "what the hell?!"
Hands instantly fisting into balls on the back of his shirt, you glare at the hearty laugh rumbling theough his chest.
A hand comes round to grab your wrist. You yelp, jump back only for Hyunjae to say, "hold on tight, Y/N!"
You're glad he can't see your face right now, flushed with heat and embarrassment as you hesitantly circle your arms around Hyunjae's waist. He speeds up in response and adrenaline runs up your spine as you zoom down the broken-up dirt trail.
Dear god, you can feel your heart pounding through your chest and you wonder if he can feel it too. Sweat dots your hairline as you pray for this moment to be over.
Except, your body is quite enjoying the sensation of having your chest pressed to Hyunjae's strong back. It might have escaped your notice, but he feels firm and warm and just so safe that you unconsciously shift closer, arms tightening ever so slightly.
It's a miracle you manage to stay alive when you finally stop at your next viewpoint; a huge expanse of beach overlooking beautiful aquamarine waves framed by rocks, one of the most visited alcoves in the neighbourhood.
"You can let go now."
As if struck by lightning, you whip your hands away and are rewarded by another of his chuckles as he turns to look at you, "why so shy all of a sudden? I swear you wanted to kill me just two minutes ago."
"Sh-shut up," you mumble while averting your gaze. He doesn't even seem fazed by what had just happened! After all, it's not every day you get to cuddle up to the man you hate the most.
Okay,...hate is a strong word. But still!
"Y/N, you okay?" Jacob asks as you descend from your quad, brows furrowed and concern painting his features, "you look pale."
"I'm fine. Just a little dizzy from the heat."
He doesn't probe any further, thankfully, allowing you to regain some of your composure while the rest of the group squabble over pictures and who looks best.
"Hey, we didn't get a picture of Hyunjae and Y/N yet," Juyeon's girlfriend points out and you swear you'll murder her.
"Oh yeah," Juyeon turns to you in realization, "come on then. Let me take a pic."
"Just for the memories," Chanhee quips.
You really don't want to. Not now, not when your insides are already messed up at the thought of Hyunjae himself. But Hyunjae -- as though he knows you're in a weak position -- nudges you forward, "alright, just for the memories."
Goddamnit, you curse inwardly aa Juyeon starts positioning himself, "you might want to get closer," he murmurs loud enough for you to hear.
Hyunjae shuffles on command, hand going into a peace sign. You try out a wobbly smile, unable to focus on anything but Hyunjae's scent.
"Y/N, you look like you're about to puke," One of the girls calls out with a giggle, "smile a little!"
So you try. You really do, though you probably look more constipated than ever. And that surprise evolves tenfold upon feeling Hyunjae’s hand circling your waist to pull you close enough for your shoulder to bump into his chest.
“Smile,” he mutters through parted lips, oblivious to the heat spreading like wildfire through your cheeks.
Click!
“All good! Let’s go,” you almost slump away at Juyeon’s words, until you’re met with resistance. Looking up at Hyunjae with a frown and an insult ready on the tip of your tongue, it dissolves the moment you’re met with tender golden brown eyes.
You can’t move. Why...is he looking at you like that?
“What?” you blurt out.
“Oh nothing, just...” his fingers come up to brush away something along your cheekbone, “you got dirt all over your face.”
He chuckles, but it doesn’t feel mischievous or annoying. It sounds...
affectionate?
“Come on,” you’re brought out of your daydream when he knocks upon your forehead. Is that normal Hyunjae behaviour? You’re not quite sure, even as you settle in the front this time, jumping when you’re wrapped up in his arms and pressed up to his chest.
You’re pretty sure it’s not the sweat that’s making you all uncomfortable and prickly.
------
“So...when are you and Hyunjae getting together?”
It’s almost dark when Jacob blurts out the question out of nowhere, the words lingering in the air like awkward bees as you turn to look at him in shock.
The group has decided on hanging out by the beach to watch the sun set in the horizon after your little ride, which you took to your advantage to stay as far away from the said young man as possible. It’s not that you’re uncomfortable from the quad ride -- you are, but that’s not the point -- it’s just that you’re trying to come to terms with the fluttery hummingbirds ravaging through your ribcage.
Maybe it is the summer heat making you fall prey to anything that can potentially become yours--
What are you even thinking?! You’re more than horrified by where your thoughts are leading you, so wrapped up in your own head that you forget to answer Jacob.
“Hello? Earth to Y/N? Did I shock you or something?”
“N-No!” You blurt out quickly, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Me and Hyunjae don’t get along that well. We only paired up because we had to. So no, and besides, we’re...we don’t like each other that way.”
“Could’ve fooled me,” Jacob winks, which doesn’t help lessen the flush overtaking the back of your neck, “well maybe you can ask the person in question.”
“Ask me what?” You want to curse aloud, turning to be faced with a dishevelled Hyunjae, topless and board shorts still damp from his earlier plunge, “what are you guys talking about so secretively?”
“Oh Y/N can tell you,” Jacob says before you can protest. He dusts himself off, ignores your glare, and waves at the both of you before trudging back to the sea where the rest of the group are chatting amongst themselves.
Hyunjae shoots you down with an amused look. You answer him with a glower that makes him laugh. Settling himself beside you on the sand dampening your shorts, he says, "what were you and Jacob whispering about?"
"None of your business," you shoot back. It's easier without having him so close. Your head is clearer, your thoughts less chaotic.
"Mean," Hyunjae pulls out his tongue. He glances down at your still-dust clad legs, "so that's why it smells around here. I was starting to think it was me."
Your foot doesn't hesitate to kick him in the shin and Hyunjae grunts in pain as you reply, "you disgust me sometimes."
"Me? What did I ever do to you?" He gasps mockingly.
"Don't worry it's just you."
"Rude!"
Glancing at the rest of your friends splashing about in the water, you then ask, "what do you want from me?"
"I need a reason to sit next to you now? You hurt me Y/N," he folds a leg against his chest, leaning his chin onto his knee to look at you through his rumpled bangs, "I thought we were comrades in crime now that we shared the same ride."
"It's partners in crime. And no, that doesn't automatically make us bffs."
"Don't deviate from the subject," his smirk is playful, annoyingly charming. Does he know how handsome he is? "What were you so invested in discussing with Jacob that your entire face turned red?"
Heat zaps through your cheeks on cue, "my face is not red!"
"Aaand we're back to the blushing," he chuckles, "was it about a boy? Maybe me?"
"Wh--Why would you care anyway?!”
“So it’s about me?”
“Wh--No! I never said such a thing!”
“Whoa there princess,” he’s quick to lift his hands in mock surrender, more and more amused by your exclamations which you realize all too soon just gave you away.
Quickly dropping your gaze to the sand and turning your head away, you try to mumble out that he’s got it all wrong, only for him to laugh softly and say, “and you think I’d believe that?”
Your heart jumps to your throat. His gaze is riveted on you now, focused and intense. Hands balling up into fists as you quickly hide them in your lap, you try to swallows and hold his eyes -- those beautiful doe eyes -- in an effort to show him that he’s not right. That you don’t have a crush on him.
You don’t!
“You know, if you wanted to keep this a secret that badly,” you jolt in surprise upon feeling the softest brush of his hand against your knuckles. You recoil, but he’s too quick, grabbing it fully and tugging it open in his hold, “you should learn how to lie a little.”
“I...” you can’t meet his eye, “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Y/N.”
His thumb prods your chin up, just the slightest. Your head tilts up to his in fear of what you might see there.
But instead of the disappointment, of the slight revulsion that might grace Hyunjae’s features, you’re faced with that same tender gaze he’d given you earlier. One that makes stars shine in his eyes.
You can’t help but gape.
“Do you like me?”
“No!”
Hyunjae bursts out laughing, “see? Your face is like an open book!”
He doesn’t have to elaborate. You feel so warm you might explode from the heat itself. Ripping your hand away as an overwhelming sense of unease settles over your shoulders, panic starts to churn in your stomach, crawl up your ribcage and stuff your throat raw with ideas you might not be so fond of.
“Y/N? Hey, you alright?” Hyunjae’s voice seems distant despite him sitting so close. You don’t realize he’s touching you until you feel his hand squeezing your shoulder.
You shudder then, not realizing that you’d been holding your breath all along. Hyunjae’s hand slips down your arm to your hand and he holds it in his own. He has big hands, you think absentmindedly, as his thumb starts tracing patterns over the back of your knuckles.
“Sorry, I don’t know how to do this,” your mutter is barely above a whisper but Hyunjae hears it, for he answers, “No, I’m sorry. It was my fault. I shouldn’t have teased you so much.”
“Well, at least you got something right. I do like you,” god, you can feel your ears burning, and it’s not just from the way he’s looking at you. It’s the way he cradles your hand in his, as though it’s so fragile that it might break, “and I...I don’t know what to do with all these stupid feelings when you obviously don’t feel the same.”
“Who said so?”
“Huh?” your eyes quickly flit up to his. Then back to his t-shirt.
“Who said I don’t feel the same?”
“Because you’re Hyunjae.”
“So? Does that mean I can’t like you back or something?”
“No but...well...I never thought it could be possible--” it’s when you look up at him that you gasp in realization that he’s blushing just as deeply as you are.
Confusion washes through you. Followed by realization.
Hyunjae likes you.
Hyunjae reciprocates your feelings.
Hyunjae, whom you always fight with, who never backs down from an argument and who’s always there i, one way or another.
“Well,” his huff breaks you out of your millionth trance, “I like you too, okay? Why do you think I tagged along? Definitely not for them,” he motions towards the boys with his arm, “I wasn’t about to third wheel all these couples for nothing.”
Warmth spreads across your chest, over your cheeks and this time you’re not ashamed to be glowing bright tomato red in front of the young man who has just laid out his heart for you to take. It feels like summer buzzing through your ribcage, endless butterflies fluttering about in a dizzy feeling of euphoria.
“So is this how you show your affection? By bullying me?” you ask teasingly.
“You do the same thing,” he retorts, turning fully so that he’s now facing you, “what did you want me to do? Buy you flowers or something? I feel like you might whack me in the face with them if I ever did that.”
“I would,” you laugh, “that would be so satisfying.”
“So,” he smirks despite the fact that he’s blushing as much as you are. Hand squeezing yours softly to bring your eyes back onto his, air gets stuck in the back of your throat at the tenderness swimming in the depths of his brown eyes, “wanna make it official?”
Your eyebrow quirks up, “you’re going to ask me out on a date?”
“No,” he leans closer as his other hand reaches up to cradle your cheek, “I’m gonna do better than that.”
You shouldn’t have been surprised by the warm pressure of his lips against yours but a small yelp escapes you nonetheless, causing him to chuckle into your mouth. He kisses you, over and over, his mouth caging yours and hand sliding up to trickle through your locks.
Wolf whistles are heard in the background, but Hyunjae is not having you pull away just yet. Instead, his tongue swipes over your bottom lip and cause you to gasp as he lifts his other hand to flip the boys off.
“Don’t mind them,” he mumbles through the kiss, as if you have the actual power to do anything else but let him have his way with you, “they’re just idiots.”
He’s so close, he smells so good -- like a mixture of boy’s shampoo and the aftertaste of the sea salt -- and you’re so wrapped up in the sensation of his tongue slipping into your mouth that you barely register your back pressing into the damp sand below you.
It is only when he pulls away that you are once more graced with the blush littering over his cheeks and out of sheer impulse, your hand reaches out to flutter over his cheekbone.
“You’re blushing so hard,” you can’t help but giggle.
“No I’m not,” Hyunjae mutters, head twisting to kiss your said hand. He leans down then to bury his face into the crook of your neck, successfully hiding from your vision and imprinting a kiss along your pulse point while doing so, “you’re the one who’s as red as a tomato.”
You’re Kevin’s mate. But you also happen to be his best friend.
Genre: werewolf au! friends to lovers! au, fluff
PART ONE | PART TWO
-----
Life has been pretty good.
Different. But good.
Ever since that day, there was no mistaking that the pair of you were attached at the hip. It’s as though the magical distant barrier that set in stone between your two bodies had vanished with nothing left in its wake. Kevin takes advantage of all the times you’re alone together now, and when you are in the presence of the other wolves, always keeps you safe and protected, heard. With a graze of his hand over your hip, a soft kiss to the back of your head as he passes by, the sweetest of smiles from across the room when your eyes meet.
It’s almost a little too much. And yet, you find yourself seeking him out more and more out of your own volition.
You announce to your parents a few weeks later that you are indeed, dating your best friend. They say they’d known ever since you’d asked them to sleepover at his house, and merely laugh at your face as it turns the colour of beetroot.
Kevin, being the jokester he is, merely wriggles his brows and pulls you into a playful hug when you finally reach the safety of your bedroom.
(But not without him receiving a certain pep talk from your father first.)
"Stop laughing!" He hisses, albeit playfully, as you try hard not to cackle.
"This is so funny. I should've made a video out of it," you grin, "to show Jake."
"Did I tell you that you talk too much?"
"On multiple occasions."
One sleepover at his house turns to two, then three, until it becomes normal for you to be around even when Kevin is not there. The more time you spend with the wolves, the more you find yourself enjoying their presence, their sense of humour, the comfort and familiarity that they bring to you.
The girls take you under their wing entirely, prompting you with bits and pieces of werewolf info that you wouldn't have known otherwise, and after dinner when the world seems to slow down, you spend it out on the porch with Kevin at your side, overlooking the darkening foliage beyond.
"You're still planning to get your degree?" You ask him once out of the blue. You can't help it; the multitude of questions burning along your tongue.
"Yeah. Why?" He tilts his head over to catch your eye, his own glistening in the ebbing darkness.
"I don't know. Thought maybe you had like a wolfy job. Specifically."
"Wolfy job?" He splutters, "what does that entail exactly?"
"I don't know. You tell me! You know how in Twilight they're like a cult? I thought it was the same you know, when you told me you guys were a pack and stuff."
Kevin bursts out in laughter, causing your entire face to flush the colour of a fire engine. You swat him in annoyance but he merely grabs at your arms to pull you flush against him.
"That's adorable," he keeps on chuckling, fighting your resistance by firmly holding your wrists down in his lap. His eyes twinkle with mischief and you burst in embarrassment of a different kind, "please tell that to the rest of the boys sometime."
"You're so annoying," you grumble, though ceasing to fight in favour of nestling against his shoulder. It has become more and more comfortable to rest against Kevin these days. It’s like the kiss has finally unleashed all the pent-up emotions, now only leaving you with that great rush of affection every time you catch a glimpse of Kevin’s face.
Lazy mornings are your favourite. When you get to wake up to Kevin's lips ghosting along the back of your shoulder as he murmurs out a, "good morning."
You hum, trying and failing to ignore the sparks of heat that his kisses leave behind, "mornin'. "
It's still early. Well, your eyes are definitely glued together and sleep sounds like absolute bliss. So when you turn and are met with your best friend's -- mate's -- chest, you waste no time burrowing deeper into the curve of his body as you let out a soft sigh. He smells so, so nice and honestly, you wish you could stay in his arms forever.
That gets harder when you feel Kevin's lips traveling up your jaw, leaving a trail of pecks in his wake, "wake up, Y/N," his voice is warm, brushing against your skin and causing goosebumps.
You shiver as you mumble, "hm, don't wanna."
Fingers brushing stray hairs away from your face, you can't help but smile softly as he proceeds to pepper kisses all over your face; your forehead, both eyelids, cheeks, nose, chin. And then, with a gentle, fleeting touch, the slightest pressure of his lips on yours.
"Hmm no," you turn your head away, but alas, he follows suit, catch the corner of your mouth as he chuckles, "morning breath, Kev--"
"I don't care," he leans up on his elbow in an attempt to follow as you roll away, hands shooting out to press him back, "I care, stop following me!"
"But Y/N!" He protests, giggling as he manages to pull away the pillow you've got smushed against his face in an attempt to block him, "just a peck, I promise."
"No, no no--Kev!" You cry out when he tosses the pillow away, cages you between his arms with barely a millimetre between your lips, "I'm serious Kev, I don't want--"
"Oh shush," he mumbles against your lips and without a second's hesitation, kisses your next breath away.
That day, you got out of bed mid-afternoon, cheeks flushed and heart giddy.
It's weird, you think, to feel Kevin's presence before you've even seen him. It's something that seems to become more and more familiar as the days go by, as though there is an itch underneath your skin that you cannot get rid of unless you're within physical distance of the said wolf.
Hyunjae tells you it's normal, it's all part of the mating process and somewhere down the line, you believe that there is magic in this world.
"Does he feel me too?" You ask once while accompanying Eric and Juyeon to the fish market to pick up something that Jacob had asked for. Apparently he's making a specialty salmon dinner that, according to Eric, is "absolutely bomb."
"You have to ask him that yourself, Y/N," Juyeon says cheekily.
"Why can't you?"
Eric bursts into laughter, "oh Y/N," he tries hard to stop, but the laughter continues on as you persisting on getting an answer "let's just say that he feels much more than just your presence."
Huh? You frown, "like what?"
"That's why you gotta ask him yourself."
So you do.
On one of those nights where you are left to your own devices. You'd both stumbled into the foyer later than usual --having spent the entire day at the library due to exam season being just around the corner -- and Younghoon had fussed over providing you with hot congee, still piping hot from the stove.
The rest of the pack are already downstairs by then, as per the shouts and the screams floating up the stairs. Not that you mind when you get the kitchen all to yourself.
"Can I ask you something?" You lift the spoon to your mouth, making sure to blow softly before eating.
"Let me guess, another wolfy question?" Kevin grins.
"You're never letting this go are you?"
His grin only widens, "as long as we're together, no." He then proceeds to nudge your shoulder with his, as if prompting you to spill the beans.
"Well, you know how I feel you even if you're not physically close to me?" You slurp another spoonful of congee in your mouth, and as he nods, continues, "do you feel me too? I asked the boys about it and no one wanted to answer me."
For a minute, only silence prevails. You want to steal a glance at the said young man, but you don't dare to. Instead glueing your gaze to your bowl.
Until Kevin clears his throat, "uhm, let's just say I sense a lot more than your presence."
That is exactly what Juyeon had said and you're not letting him get away with it this time, "like what?"
The way Kevin groans has you think that there's something completely wrong with the way he senses you, and that somehow makes you uncomfortable. You shift in your seat, the heat in your cheeks taking their place as you wonder what else he's been keeping from you.
"Do I..." you try to clear your throat, "do I smell bad or something?"
"Wha--No! No not at all! That's not-- That's not it," Kevin quickly splutters out, throwing his hands up to emphasize his point, "it's just...I feel you. All of you."
"You're not giving much to work on here Kev."
"Like, I mean, I feel your emotions, I feel the way you smell, the way you move, when you're angry or nervous. I feel all that," he takes a pause, "I feel it...when you're--uh..."
"What?"
He turns away from you and somehow, he's blushing even more than you are. Your curiosity perks up.
"What, Kev?"
"I smell you."
"Yeah well you're a wolf. I hope you smell me."
"Not--Not like that, Y/N. LIke when you're..." his hand goes up to scratch the back of his neck, the other grabs his spoon as he focuses on eating the rest of his porridge. And through it all comes his mumble, "when you're ovulating."
Your jaw almost drops open, "are you serious?" Your hand instinctively goes to your tummy, "I--oh god. That must be terrible--"
"Actually," Kevin cuts your sentence off, eyes catching yours despite the embarrassment permanently etched onto his face, "I don't smell the blood. I smell--You smell...different. Like... like good different."
You're not quite sure you understand and it takes a whole minute for you to process his words.
Until you do.
Oh.
Oh.
"Y--You mean, like...in a ...desirable way? Like... like mating season?" the words tumble out of your mouth in a mere whisper but Kevin nods,
Oh. Shit.
Maybe it hadn't been the wisest question to ask at the beginning of such a relationship. It's still a long way to go before you even think of giving your flower away to this man. Despite him having been your best friend for as long as you could remember, you are currently still trying to wrap your head around the fact that this is your boyfriend, your mate. Your significant other.
It makes you giddy. It makes you scared.
You're thankful when exams season does roll around. That gives you an excuse not to drop by the boys' house anymore and if Kevin had noticed anything off about you, he hadn't asked. So you plunge headfirst into studying, favouring sleepless nights at the library and texting Kevin that sorry, you won't make it to dinner because there's still so much to learn and that he should eat without you.
That works for about two days.
On the third, he magically appears right outside your last lecture with a look that tells you that no matter what argument you're considering, he's not letting you get away with it.
He waits until you're in the library and away from most of the noisy, boisterous students from the Business Department, waits until you plonk down your things on the table before shoving the warm tupperware in your arms.
"Eat," he says simply, dragging another chair to sit opposite you.
"D'you wanna share--"
"Nah, just eat."
"Classes ended early for you?" you ask while opening the tupperware and you swear you might have drooled right then and there. Jacob's food is always exquisite and no surprise there, considering that his day job is being the head chef of the kitchen.
Tonight he's prepared some warm chop suey and a chicken grilled to perfection. Topping that off with some japanese rice that literally melts in your mouth.
"Can I like...steal Jacob?" you groan in delight as the food hits your tastebuds, "this is so good."
Kevin doesn't laugh though, only looks at you from across the table with his arms crossed over his chest and an indescribable look on his face.
You know Kevin. But this is a face you've never seen before.
It makes your heart jump nervously.
"Kev," you swallow your mouthful, "what's up? You've been spacing out."
"Did I scare you?" he blurts out.
You blink, "scare me?"
"Don't play dumb Y/N, I know when you're avoiding me," he narrows his eyes at you from across the table, "I can feel you, remember?"
A sigh escapes your lips then, causing you to place your spoon back in your dish, "it scared me, the whole "I feel you" thing. I've only been coming to terms with us being...official. I--It's hard for me to wrap my head around it. It's...It's going a little fast, Kev."
"I didn't ask you for anything, Y/N," his eyes burn with untold emotion and for some reason it makes your chest tighten uncomfortable, "I didn't ask for you to give me anything. I don't want anything from you, I hope you know that."
Swallowing hard as the tears slowly ebb through the corner of your eyes, your gaze falls to the table as you try your best not to let his words hurt you. Because Kevin is right. He hadn't done anything to scare you off, had respected your boundaries and had treated you like a queen all this time.
And after all this time, you still doubt him.
"Look. I'm trying my best to make you happy," bringing his hands to his cheeks, he rubs his face with a tiredness that makes your heart clench, "but if you don't want me to, I won't."
And before you can say anything in return, before you can tell him that he's got it all wrong, Kevin slides out of the chair, turns his back on you, and walks out of the library door.
----
"I fucked up."
"From the crying that Kev's been doing the past few days, yes I'd say you fucked up pretty bad."
You shoot up from Soa's bed in alarm, "he's been crying?!"
"Uhm yes. I know I wasn't supposed to snitch," Soa bites down onto her lower lip as you quickly scramble around to look at her with wide eyes, practically horrified by her statement, "but yeah. He's been having it pretty rough. You guys are close. He feels a lot. Maybe too much."
"Shit," tears well up in your eyes as if on impulse, "shit. How did I not feel it? I'm--"
And you burst into full-fledged tears, with Soa bringing you into her arms with a 'there, there' that does nothing to help the sudden guilt washing over you.
It's been a few days after Kevin's sudden interlude into the library and though you've been practically drowning in remorse, you know your best friend -- your mate -- well enough that he'll probably wish to be alone until he manages to digest his sadness by himself. That's the way he works anyway.
So any temptation of you visiting him was thrown out of the window when you reel yourself back in. How selfish, you think to yourself in growing frustration, here he is, laying down his heart for you to do as you please, and you can barely keep up with treating him as he should be?
No. Instead, you decided to trample all over his patience and removed yourself from the situation entirely as though Kevin had been on prowl for your body when he's been anything but that.
You're not sure yourself how many times you've mumbled those words to your reflection, in hopes that somehow it would reach the said man in question.
I'm so sorry.
You wait almost a week, make sure that you've given him enough time to digest his emotions, before you go up to his house to find him.
But you're welcomed by Sunwoo and Changmin, busy playing video gamea while the rest of the pack is out doing their rounds.
"You can stay though Y/N," Sunwoo beckons you to the living room where a stack of snacks currently overflow the coffee table.
"Yeah, you're practically family now anyway," Changmin adds with a warm grin. That makes you feel slightly better, despite not having really spoken to them before this direct encounter.
"Thanks," you try not to let the emotion get to your voice as you settle next to Changmin, stuffing your face with the chips he offers you.
Thirty minutes later finds you practically engaged in the said game, shouting and jeering along with the two boys, laughing manically at the way Sunwoo fucks over and comes in last in the Mario Kart race. They let you play along with them and soon enough, you manage to forget all your worries in that particular moment.
Reality splashes in your face like icy water the moment you hear Kevin's alto at the door.
"Y/N?"
"Oh!" You jump in your seat, turning over your shoulder and taking notice of the grocery bags in Kevin's hold, Juyeon and Hyunjae in tow. They look like they came right out of grocery shopping and as the two younger boys jump up to help, you hang awkwardly by the doorway, not knowing whether you're allowed to help out in the kitchen, whether they'll even let you.
You don't miss the pointed look that Hyunjae sends your supposed mate, so after a few minutes of strained awkward small talk, Kevin bustles out and motions for you to follow him to his room.
You do so without so much as a protest.
Kevin makes sure to close the door firmly behind you, and you don't fail to notice the tension in his shoulders, the stony set of his lips. The way he avoids your eyes like you have the plague.
"What's up?" he settles against the door, still standing.
You don't know what to do. So you just stand in the middle of his room, arms hanging awkwardly at your side.
You bring them into a fold against your chest, as if making yourself smaller would help matters.
"I want to talk," you manage to murmur.
"Okay."
He just watches you, a silent signal for you to go on.
The look in his eyes, the stormy calm, it makes you uneasy.
But you know you'll have to push through. Because at the end of the day, it's Kevin that you want. And that will never change, no matter what.
So after a harsh swallow and a deep breath, you look up at his face.
"I was unfair to you. And for that, I'm sorry. It's true that I'm scared about us, and when I said that it was moving too fast, I realized that these were my own feelings. I'm scared...of moving too fast," you pause, "off loving you, so quickly."
He doesn't say anything. You blunder on blindly.
"I'm scared...of loving you. It hasn't even been a month and I'm a mess. You--you make me crazy, Kev. There's no other explanation. I'm scared I'm not enough for you. You're perfect. You give me everything and I give you absolutely nothing," tears well up in your eyes and you're quick to rub them away fiercely, hating how emotional you're getting. You continue in staggered breaths, "a-and the thing I'm most scared of is that I love you. Too much. So much. Too quickly--"
You can't help it. You break down into pieces as you feel yourself tear apart, overridden with emotion you cannot quite place. It almost seems like your entire body convulses as you crumble to your knees.
It's not fair on Kevin. You know it's not.
Especially when you feel his arms come around you in the most gentle of embraces. You hiccup, nose meeting his shoulder blade as he lets you cry into his chest.
Guilt tastes bitter on your tongue and you can't help but grab onto your best friend in an attempt to bring back some of your self control. But that all goes to the wind the moment Kevin opens his mouth to say:
"It's okay, Y/N."
You're not sure how long it takes for you to calm down until only hiccups are left. But Kevin's shirt is practically soaked through, your fingers bunched up his clothing like a child desperate for him not to let go. Shame colours your face red and you bury your nose into his chest.
"Hey," Kevin nudges you, tries pulling away. You hold on, "Y/N. Look at me, please? I just want to talk."
So you do. After a few minutes of tense hesitation, you look up into Kevin's brown orbs in fear of what you might find there.
But what makes you gasp is that his eyes are glistening with unshed tears.
He laughs softly at your horrified expression, "stop looking at me like that."
"Wh--Why are you crying?"
Lower lip trembling, Kevin releases a shaky breath and averts his eyes. His hand unconsciously finds yours in a gesture of affection, "I don't know. I guess...hearing you say that... makes me happy."
He's trying so hard not to look you in the eye but the emotion you see etched on his face is so obvious that no one could've missed it.
"I'm sorry," you murmur with another choked back sob, "I never wanted you to feel inadequate. It wasn't my intention. I didn't want to hurt you--"
"It's okay," Kevin's hand reaches up to cradle your face then, eyes slowly falling to yours and locking. And you swear you find all the answers to the questions hidden in the depths of your heart, "and you did nothing wrong, Y/N. I overreacted. I shouldn't have told you all that when I wasn't in my right mind. I guess that I--well, I didn't want to lose you."
You laugh amidst the fresh tears pooling out of your eyes, "you won't lose me, Kev. Never--"
He pulls you into him, cutting off your flow of words with one hand cradling the back of your neck and the other pressing into the side of your waist. Before you know it, you're kissing each other as though this is the last time you might get a chance to do so.
He kisses you with pent-up, fiery passion that makes your lungs ache, mouth pressing onto yours with a fervour that can only leave you gasping for more even when he parts for breath. Your hands go up to tangle into his hair, tugging down to kiss, and kiss, and kiss, until your lips turn numb and your tongues intertwine in such intimate manners you would've made anyone else blush.
At some point, you feel yourself tilting backwards to press against the floor. Kevin leans forward, mouth nibbling onto your bottom lip and causing a whimper to escape your throat. He growls low in response, hands warm as they slip underneath your shirt and mouth slipping to your jaw to leave a trail of fiery, chaste kisses along the skin there.
Your head tilts backwards on accord with a sigh of bliss and Kevin't can't help but smirk against your skin, "like that?" He hums, nipping at your neck.
"Shut up," squirming and pulling him even closer to your neck, your hands take a life of their own; slipping under your mate's shirt to trace over his spine. He shudders, hissing at the delicious contact before suckling along your collarbone and relishing in the soft moan rolling off your tongue.
"So pretty," his murmur is warm, nose nuzzling your jaw in affection. You're not done yet though, yanking him up by his shirt to crash your lips against his once more and making him groan.
You're all warm and soft and alive, vibrating with so much heat beneath him. He kisses you once more, tongue slipping past your lips with another moan of his and hips rolling into yours. You gasp out his name and he swears he's never felt so close to paradise. If only he can just tear everything away and just take you--
Stop.
He wrenches himself away, breathless and averting his gaze to the floor. Inside him, his wolf is quaking, forcing its way out to the surface and Kevin has to clutch his chest, hands finding purchase onto the floor in an attempt to restrain the heat curling in his belly.
He hears your voice like a dim echo at the back of hjs mind. Closing his eyes to concentrate, he hears it again.
"Kevin? You okay?"
Finally. Finally, he opens his eyes to the floor. Swallows hard.
The desire. The lust...is gone for now.
"Y-Yeah," he takes a shaky breath, brushes his hair back with his hand only to notice he is sweating bullets. Slowly, his gaze makes its way back to yours, "sorry... I'm okay."
He sees the questions in your eyes, but you decide to drop the situation and for that, he's grateful. Instead, your hand rests upon his elbow in a gesture of comfort, one that he seeks by allowing his head to lean on your shoulder with a heavy sigh.
"What was that about?" You ask as your hand goes to smooth over his locks.
Kevin hesitates, before murmuring out, "it's hard to--to control him...sometimes."
Your hand pauses. "You mean...your wolf?"
Kevin nods. Somewhere deep inside him, his wolf purrs at the attention. Shut up, boy.
To his surprise though, you let out a small laugh, "what a wild boy."
That's because I am! His wolf yips as Kevin rolls his eyes, "don't encourage him. He loves when you give him attention."
"Does he now?" You start ruffling his hair like you would a dog and it takes every single nerve in him not to croon at your feet, "what a good boy."
"Shut--Shut up Y/N," Kevin mutters, though he leans deeper into your touch with flaming red cheeks.
You think you can live this way. Everything feels so right, even as Kevin straightens to wrap you in his arms instead. It's like the missing hole in your heart finally makes sense, to be filled with nothing else but Kevin's love.
You can go on forever listening to Kevin's heartbeat.
-----
A/N: alrighttt so i originally planned that there would be only 3 parts but i wrote so much that I'll need a 4th part to wrap it up hehe. So yes! Part 4 is gonna come soon! Xx
You groan when you feel a hand shaking your shoulder, turning away from your boyfriend who seems to be a little too jovial for a Monday morning.
“What?” Your words get muffled by the pillow hiding your face against the glaring sun, as you feel his hands rest along your hips.
Slowly, he turns you around and another groan slips past your mouth when you do as you’re told, coming face to face with Eric’s grin. Usually it’s cute. But right now, you’re not sure whether you want to slap him for waking you up from your deep slumber.
It’s not like you have the best sleep cycle. So when you do, it’s quite annoying to be woken up without warning.
“I brought breakfast,” he whispers.
Breakfast? That catches your attention. You prop yourself up on your elbows with furrowed eyebrows, noticing that there is indeed, a platter of eggs and toast balanced precariously on the edge of your night table that Eric picks up. He sits himself on the edge, one of his hands beckoning you over to his side, which you do so without complaint, heart fluttering at the warmth basking on his face.
“What a nice surprise,” you say with a soft smile as he pulls you into his chest, cuddling you close. Then, after ensuring that the plate won’t fall off his lap, he stabs at a piece of egg with his fork before bringing it up to your mouth.
“Ah,” he says, and you eat it obediently, watching with a curious gaze as he plops another piece in his mouth.
“So? Did you break something? Or did you do something that would make me mad?” you narrow your eyes while analyzing his features, though he scoffs at you in mock offence, “I made you breakfast and that’s the response I get?”
You shoot him a look.
“Okay,” he chews the inside of his cheek, looks away bashfully, “maybe I did do something that would make you mad.”
“Like what?”
"Like...maybe mistaking your concealer for sunscreen?"
"What?!" You jolt up instantly and he screams as the plate almost topples, his hand shooting out just in time to avoid an accident.
"I'm joking," he laughs good-naturedly while pressing a kiss to your temple, "your concealer is still as good as new."
"You're so annoying."
"And you are so fun to tease," he tickles your side, making you squeal as you try to squirm away. Thank god for his strong hold on the breakfast plate, or it would’ve already splattered across the floor by now.
As you take a bite out of the buttered bread he offers you with a satisfied noise of agreement, your mind can’t help but ponder over the multitude of reasons why Eric is being so extra sweet today.
As if reading your train of thoughts, your boyfriend’s fingers flick your forehead lightly. You jolt with a yelp of pain, “what-- that hurt!”
“I know what you’re thinking,” he frowns at you while wagging a finger, “you think I did something. In fact, I did nothing but do you a favour this morning.”
“Because?” you drag the word out before playfully biting his finger.
He grimaces, jerking his limb away with a roll of his eyes, “because I quite love you and because I thought it’d be a sweet gesture. Now I’m not so sure. What happened to ‘oh my god Eric I love you so much, you’re such an amazing boyfriend.’ “ his voice gets higher as he imitates you, which makes you swat him in return.
“You’re not funny.”
“Never said I was babe,” he holds out a piece of sausage as he speaks and you take a bite, allowing the taste to coat your tongue. You gesture towards the plate, “you eat some.”
“Feed me then.”
Rolling your eyes before stabbing some sausage with your fork, you do as you’re told and he hums in satisfaction, “mhm, that’s good,” before proceeding to lean in and peck your mouth.
A noise of surprise erupts from your throat and Eric can’t help chuckling softly at how adorable you look, all shocked and with nothing to say. That is, until his eyes scan down to your mouth once more and without even thinking twice, he’s cupping your jaw to press another longer kiss.
One kiss becomes two. Then becomes three. And then they’re becoming longer, mouth keeping on brushing against yours until they’re practically molded together with no space left to spare. His free arm quickly discards the breakfast plate on your nightstand and before you know it, you’re down on your back with Eric’s shoulders bunching as he props himself atop your figure to kiss you some more, slower, longer caresses of mouth to mouth. And soon, his tongue joins in a soft cadence that has you gasping, and not just because you feel a particular hardness against your thigh.
