#theanswerisno

It amazes me how much I can get caught up in my own circumstances.

From time to time I find myself with so much wanting, cravings and an urge to make things more than what they really are. And it all makes me so tired, like I have been desperately running for a long time, escaping from forgotten nightmares, searching for made-up dreams.

January 8th, 2017

Would you take him back?

I often find myself struggling to answering this question 11 months of hoping he’d come back to me as a changed man Month of hoping he’d finally see himself threw my eyes Eyes that saw a strong loving family man A man that once did anything for me at anytime of the day A man that put me before himself, just to see me happy But days turned to months and months almost into a year And it’s came down to multiple second chances and millions of words never being put into action

I cried my eyes out for you that night.. The night you were suppose to show me you’ve changed The night you were going to change because I was your world again

Yet I found myself on the same roller coaster I swore I’d never go on again The feeling of your selfishness and desire to be accepted by your friends and this world that has done nothing but tear you down and has done nothing but bring me along for the ride

I swore I’d never do this again… I’d never put someone else’s happiness above mine But look at me now.. 11 months later, you come running back to me on Monday, and go running back to your same selfish ways four days later

So I ask myself When will enough be enough? When will I run outta tears for you? When will I realize, I deserve the unconditional love I give you so freely.

So when I ask myself the question I’ve always struggled to answer,

Would you take him back?