Jul 8
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It’s the river’s first official swim spot. So why is Thames Water threatening the 'Costa del Ham'? – The Londoner
This river does something to people. Regular folks come to the Thames just to swim or row, but before long they're fired up about sewage and now, an abstraction scheme that threatens to take over the bank. In my first story for The Londoner, I met the locals who started out campaigning for bathing water status, and who are now taking on Thames Water's plans which would bring the beach party to a sorry end. As Londoners are claiming back the river, we’re demanding a say in what happens to it.
With my apologies to The Platters:
They said that I would die
I said, "The Thames is fine.
OHHHHHHH
"It's 1785, modern medical science
"Will keep me alive."
They said, "What of all the trash,
"The sewage and the ash?
OHHHHH OHHH
"When you gulp and gasp, and you breathe your last,
"Smoke gets in your ass."
So I chaffed them and I gaily laughed
To think they could doubt my strokes
Yet today, my luck has flown away
I am struck by a boat
(Struck by a boat)
Now, as I start to pass,
Someone lights a match,
OHHGGHHHGGHHAGGHRGGH
My trousers now unclasped, bellows are pumped full blast,
Smoke gets in your ass
reflection
Photographer - shy-girl04 : London 2025
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London, the Thames. Photographer unknown.
Boats are stranded on the River Thames at Strand-on-the-Green near Kew, as drought-stricken Britain dries up in August 1976.
Photographer - shy-girl04 : Tower Bridge, London 2025