#tfatwsxreader

You were relaxing at home when you got the text from Sam. Joaquin got injured on a mission in Switzerland, investigating the Flag Smashers. He had tried to arrest one of their members, or who he thought was the leader of the heist, when he was knocked down and unconscious by the incredibly strong individual.

You thanked Sam for letting you know and grabbed your keys to rush to the Airbase. 

As soon as Joaquin’s plane arrived, you were there, walking up the airstrip to interrogate him.

“What happened to keeping me updated?”, you approached him with furrowed eyebrows.

“I was kinda preoccupied in the moment.”, gripping a bag over his shoulder.

You sighed, clicking your tongue and tilting your head.

“All you had to do was ask and I would have been there.”

He waved his hands, his bruised orbital causing him to squint slightly.

“It's just a broken orbital, Y/N. I’m fine, honestly.”

“You’re lucky all you got was a broken bone. I gave you my number so you could call me in for these types of missions.”, you shook your head. 

“Look, it was just supposed to be recon, it happened to turn sideways.”

You left out a huff as your hands travelled to your hips. Your lips pursed but you made eye contact with Joaquin’s slouched posture and tired eyes. A patch of blue and purple bloomed under his eye along with a scatter of scratches and cuts. 

You stepped closer, gripping his arm delicately,

“The last thing I-,we want is for you to get hurt when we could have stopped it. I’ve faced all sorts of threats in the past so nothing really fazes me anymore.”, you chuckled.

Joaquin let out a breathy laugh, nodding his head as you rubbed his arm.

“Also, Sam can be annoying sometimes so it’s refreshing to hear someone else’s voice.”, earning a slight chuckle from Joaquin as he gripped his injured side.

“What I’m saying is, you don’t have to do it alone.”

Joaquin relaxed his shoulders, feeling the work of the last couple days hit him.

“I know, it’s just - I’m still trying to get used to it, ya know? Having people there for me. It’s been quiet these five years.”

Here is where you had two differing experiences. Almost half the universe had been blipped out of existence. 

For those that remained behind, they had to move on without their friends and loved ones. 

For those that came back, they had to get on with what they lost - time and coming home to a place that was changed.

“I know that must’ve been really hard. I barely recognise half of the places I walk by. Everything is so different now…”, you trailed off.

Once you returned, your family was broken. Natasha and Tony had sacrificed themselves to bring everyone back, Steve had left them to return the stones in the past and Wanda…

Wanda left after Tony’s funeral. Vision was gone and so was Natasha - her grief was different from the rest. 

You had all drifted apart after the Blip, trying to find your way to who you are now. After Steve left the shield with Sam, you’d always wondered what would happen next. Bucky was trying to adjust to the times, still recovering from his trauma. The US Government had mandated therapy for him with a weekly therapist but he didn’t seem to like her much at all. Y/N knew the therapy was good for him, but the therapist’s methods were questionable in her mind. 

They were all changed by what happened, but they were trying to find normalcy. They came back into a world far different than before. They were different people from before it all happened.

“I didn’t call you because I thought it was nothing at the time. I’ve been tracking these guys online for months. They’re dangerous and I didn’t want to drag anyone else into it unless I was sure.”

Joaquin ducked his head down to play with your hand, 

“I wouldn’t be able to deal with myself if something happened to you.”

You paused for a moment at his revelation, gripping his hand tightly in response.

“That’s different-”, you shook your head

“How? How is it different?”

“I’ve got powers to protect myself, you don’t have to worry about me.”

“Doesn’t change the fact that I do.”, he shook his head.

You both paused, sighing in the silence before you decided to jump back in to break it...gently.

“I’ve had my fair share of broken bones but I gotta say, that looks painful.”, you pointed at his bruised cheek.

Joaquin rolled his eyes and chuckled, nudging your shoulder.

“Well some of us aren’t invulnerable. Also pretty sure the guy who knocked me out was enhanced.”

“No shit...and this is why we always?...listen to Y/N, yes!”

“Oh, c’mon! You’re gonna milk this for ages, aren’t you?”, Joaquin groaned.

“Yup.”

A smirk grew on your face at his grimace.

“Ok ok, how about we grab some food? My treat?”, he opened his arms in defeat.

You scoffed, slapping Joaquin’s bicep, 

“Are you kissing up to me, Flyboy?”

He swatted your hands, a grin playing across his face as he chuckled,

“No… but would it get me back in your good graces?”

You pondered on it for a few seconds, nodding furiously at the proposition to dinner.

“Hmmm, I’ll have to consider it. I’m craving Italian food. Pizza?”

Joaquin nodded his head along as you both walked towards the front entrance where you had parked your car.

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

You walked side by side, slowing to meet his pace. He had a slight limp as he favoured his left, being cautious about his sore side.

“You better not say you like pineapple.”, Joaquin jabbed.

You huffed, eyes widening in shock.

“And what is wrong with pineapple on pizza?!”

“Aside from the fact it’s disgusting! Fruit does not belong on a pizza.”, he scrunched his nose in disgust, laughing at your aghast expression.

“Tomatoes are a fruit!”, you pointed out.

“That doesn’t count!”

You nodded your head as you unlocked the car, 

“I think it does.”

Grabbing his bag off his shoulder, you placed it in the backseat, opening the passenger side. Nodding your head to the side, you gently nudged Joaquin to sit, pushing the door closed behind him. Jogging over to the driver’s side, you got in  and plugged in your seatbelt before reversing the car.

“Well since you’re paying, why don’t you decide this time, Flyboy?”, you glanced to the side as he relaxed in his seat.

“Alright but don’t come at me with those glowing hands if you don’t like it.”, he grinned.

You shook your head,

“Yes, because pizza toppings are the peak of my tolerance.”

Your eyes track back to the road in focus, the radio peaking through. Joaquin’s head leaned against the window on his hand as the rumble of the car lulled him to sleep. You got lost in your thoughts as you continued along the road.

“You should take better care of yourself, Flyboy. I don’t wanna come down here again and see you hurt.”

“I’m-I know that we haven’t known each other for that long. Heck, I only met you six months ago.”, you spoke softly.

“It’s been a tough adjustment since I got back. I haven’t really felt like myself at all - but then here you are and everything just…”, your rambling filling the quiet.

“It's better… I-”

You glance over at Joaquin but his eyes are closed shut, his head leaning against the window. He’s sound asleep, looking far more relaxed and peaceful than when you first saw him. 

Your chest tightened as you scanned over the bruising scattered over his smooth, tan skin. 

“Let someone take care of you for once.”

***

Thanks again for reading, lovelies xx 

Hope you enjoyed it and tag me in TFATWS fics!

Comment if you’d like to be tagged. I’ll make a Masterlist...when I figure out how to create one (lol).

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Joaquin stood by his word and incorporated Sam and Y/N in the investigation. They had been at the Airbase for a total of 3 hours and 49 minutes, reading through documents and following up leads using the database resources. 

You rest your hands on your stomach as you shut your eyes for a moment. The bags under your eyes had become more noticeable in the past couple days, what with sleepless nights and long hours. All of which led you to grow closer to the coffee machine in your small apartment.

The nightmares had grown worse in the past week, haunting more than the occasional dream. Sometimes it was just the darkness that irked you, which you’d usually resolve with a bit of light. More recently, they formed into horrific events where you couldn’t save Sam or Bucky. The worst instance was last night’s terror.

This time, Joaquin showed up instead. 

Instead of the usual guilt that strung you up, an aching sorrow and horror overwhelmed you as you lost control. 

The fire was everywhere.

It burned until nothing was left.

Until the last edge of life was gone.

Even as you grasped for the tip of control to stop it, the flames extended further and further.

You couldn’t stop them,

And that terrified you.

It had its grip on your throat, ever-so-slowly compressing your windpipe as you clawed for the surface.

“Y/N?”

You inhaled sharply, opening your eyes to Joaquin’s concerned gaze as he leaned across the desk.

“You alright? You dozed off there.”

You nodded your head, slacking your jaw to recognise your feet touching the ground, the cabinets along the walls and lastly, the man sitting behind the desk.

His concerned gaze is glued to your widened eyes which scan the room, almost as if you weren’t completely aware.

“Yeah...I haven’t been getting much sleep is all.”

Joaquin nodded, returning to the words on the document,

“I’ve noticed. You’ve been a bit jittery the past couple days.”

“And...that’ll be the caffeine.”, you trailed, as you stood and stretched your limbs out.

“Don’t say what I think you’re going to say.”

Joaquin glanced up from the desk, shaking his head as a smirk grew on his face. The bruise under his left eye had slowly been healing from the past mission, along with a large cut along his forehead.

“I wasn’t gonna say anything.”

“Oh really? Then what’s the face for?”

“What face?”, he laughed and stared at you incredulously.

You leaned your hands against the back of the chair as pointed at him,

“That face that says I’m judging you.”

“This is not a judgemental face. This is the face of someone who is concerned about you.”

You’re quiet, allowing Joaquin to continue as you grip the back of the chair. Averting your eyes to the floor, your stomach plummets. Thumps palpate in your chest as your blood seems to pump harder.

“Are you okay?”, he asked.

You gulped down your anxiety, making eye contact with Joaquin so as to convince him and yourself as you spoke.

“...Yeah. I’m fine.”, you nodded your head and smile with the lack of enthusiasm that brings his attention to it. Joaquin cocks his head to the side, trying to see deeper into your mind.

“Y/N-”

The door bursts open as another uniformed soldier leans in the doorway.

“Lieutenant, I’ve got an update waiting for you, Sir.”

Joaquin stood from his seat, nodding his head at the officer.

“Alright, thanks, you can hand it over.”

The soldier nods his head, leaving the folder on the desk before shutting the door. You huff out a sigh at the tension and silence filling the office. Joaquin gathered up the remaining papers on the desk into neat piles, tidying the space.

“Look, it’s nothing I can’t handle. I’m electing not to sleep and I’m getting more work done.”

“You can’t live like this, Y/N, you’re gonna run yourself into the ground.”

“Yeah well right now, I’d rather not face those fears. Got bigger fish to fry right now.”, you purse your lips and nodded towards the folder.

You exit the office, wandering the first level of the base offices. Your arms press against the railing as you drop your head and listen to the bustling of people and machinery echo across the base. Slumped over the railing, you concentrate on counting your breaths as you hear Joaquin’s feet stomp closer to you.

Joaquin leans next to you on the border as you refuse to move, knowing that your façade of calm will chip as soon as you look at him.

“Y/N, if somethings bothering you, you should tell me. I know you feel that keeping it to yourself is better than admitting it but trust me, it’s a lot worse.”, he leaned down to meet your gaze as a stoic blank expression overcame you.

Your throat tightens and clench your jaw to suppress the sob building in your chest. 

You’ve always been alone with your thoughts, threatening to crack under the constant pressure behind your skull. The Avengers had been an unconventional setting but you created close relationships with a few of them. Some you lost along the way because of uncontrollable things but you wonder. 

You wonder if maybe something was wrong with you.

If it was your fault why they always left.

Why no one stuck around for long.

Tears glimmer, threatening to fall but you exhale a long breath out, turning to him. You twiddle your fingers, jaw clenched as you choke out the words in a whisper.

“...okay.”

Joaquin’s posture straightened as you stepped away from the railing and nodded your head in agreement.

“I’ll try. For you, Flyboy.”

He hummed and a small smile grew on his face at the nickname. 

“That’s all I ask.”

Looking over his shoulder, you recognise a familiar face. 

“Hey, Wilson.” you called over Joaquin’s shoulder, causing Sam’s eyes to flicker between the two of you.

“Hey, Y/L/N. I see you guys are spending extra time together…”, Sam implied with a smirk.

Y/N rolled her eyes at Sam’s implications, nudging his arm.

“It’s about time he kept me in the loop.”

He recognises the dark circles under your eyes and how tired you look but elects to ignore it. 

“You alright?”, Sam asks.

You look up at Joaquin as his lips twitch upwards in a small encouraging smile. His hand slides across the railing, hovering next to yours as you reply.

“I’m right where I need to be.”

You trail off as you notice Sam’s stiff posture and tension as he glides his hands into his pockets.

“How are you?”

After the huge declaration of America’s new ‘Captain America’, you were infuriated with the SHAM. Walker had done nothing to deserve that shield. 

It was Sam that Steve chose. 

It was Sam that deserved the shield.

You can only imagine how upset he is feeling. 

Sam almost shrugs, tilting his head as he doesn’t know how to express all of his feelings about the situation.

You all glance towards a screen as a poster of John Walker holding up Steve’s shield is shown.

“Seems like a good guy. You met him?”, Joaquin asks.

“No.”, Sam replied.

“Thanks for doing this on such short notice.”

“Yeah. No sweat. I’m just finishing up the checklist. You’ll be all good to go once you land in Munich.”

“I’ll be in the air with Joaquin so you can keep us updated…”

You trail off because your attention phases to Bucky Barnes’ entrance. With the fury in his step, you can practically visualise the daggers Bucky is sending towards Sam as you descend the stairs.

“Shouldn’t have given up the shield.”

“Good to see you too, Buck.”

“This is wrong.”, Bucky interjects.

Bucky follows Sam, cutting him off to interrogate. 

“Hey, hey, look, I’m working, all right? So all this outrage is gonna have to wait.”

Bucky narrows his eyes,

“You didn’t know that was gonna happen?”

Sam is aghast, “No, of course I didn’t know that was gonna happen. You think it didn’t break my heart to see them march him out there and call him the new Captain America?”

“Steve didn’t want this.”

“Oh, my God. What do you want me to do? Call America and tell ’em I changed my mind? Huh?”

Joaquin rests a hand on your shoulder, bringing your attention back to him,

“I’m gonna go ahead and set up before we leave.”

You nod, acknowledging him, gripping his hand,

“I’ll be right there.”, sending him a reassuring smile.

You watch as Sam and Bucky tussle in an argument over the shield and then the mission.

You find yourself striding up to them as Sam stomps off alone towards the plane.

“Hey stranger.”

Bucky turns around and his eyes light up in recognition. He flicks over your tired eyes and sombre expression.

“Sam didn’t know this would happen.”

“Well, he shouldn’t have given it up in the first place. It doesn’t belong there.”

“Bucky… I know how much that shield means to you... But you have to understand that Sam did what he thought was the right thing. We have to accept that. It’s what Steve wanted.”

“This is not what Steve would have wanted, Y/N.”

Bucky is fuming at the thought of the man parading as Captain America.

“I know, I know, Bucky. But we gotta work together to solve this one.”

“Just like always.”

He hummed, looking at the plane.

“Fine, but it doesn’t change the fact I’m mad at him.”

You sigh but agree because you know your boys are stubborn.

*****

You sit up on a crate as the plane flies below the drop-off zone for Sam and Bucky. You were sitting this one out to surveil with Joaquin from above.

“One minute to drop off, Sam.”

You watch Joaquin as he assesses the distance below and the time on his watch. The cuts and scrapes on his face have mostly healed but the blue and purple bruising under his eye remains. 

“So what’s our plan?”, Bucky asks Sam who ignores him as he positions his com in his ear.

“Great. So no plan.”

Bucky shakes his head in annoyance, sitting back down in his seat.

“Thirty seconds!”, Joaquin yells, looking out into the open air.

“I’m reconsidering sending those two out there alone.”

You glance anxiously between Sam and Bucky as the tension in the plane stirs.

“But they’re not alone, because they’re going together.”, Joaquin points out.

“That’s the part I’m worried about.”

You smile unconvincingly at Joaquin as you listen to the men bicker.

“Enjoy your ride, Buck.”

Bucky rejects Sam’s use of the nickname,

“No, you can’t call me that.”

“Why not? That’s what Steve called you.”

You roll your eyes at the childish banter between the two. You were considering the amount of logic and coordination between the two of them but then again, you were too tired to get on board for this mission.

“Steve knew me longer, and Steve had a plan.”

“Why couldn’t Steve be here?”, you whisper sarcastically.

“Fifteen seconds to drop.”

“I have a plan.”, Sam defends.

“Really? What is it?”

Sam ignores Bucky, jumping from the plane. Joaquin peeks his head out in amusement as Sam ignites his suit and flies off. He still wears that look of amaze on his face since the first time he saw the suit.

“Great. Where’s the chute?”, Bucky asked, looking around.

“We’re at 200 feet. It’s too low for a chute.”

“I don’t need it anyway.”

Joaquin perked an eyebrow, glancing at Bucky from the side, 

“You sure about that?”

“No! I know that look Bucky and I swear-”

“Yeah.”, Bucky sighs, yelling as he drops from the plane.

You and Joaquin both stare out into the open air as Bucky plummets into a tree, slowing his descent.

“What. An. Idiot.”, you exclaim from beside Joaquin.

“That looks like it hurts too.”

Pulling your sleeves down, you shiver and pull back from the open door to return to your seat. 

“He’ll be fine. I think.”

Joaquin slides the door shut as its seals with a hiss. 

You retract back into yourself as your thoughts return in the quiet.

Luckily, Joaquin is there to push them back.

“Hey, join me upstairs? I’ve gotta track activities for Sam from up here.”, he waits for your answer.

“Sure.”

He steps aside to let you walk up the steps first, sliding behind you as you reach the second floor. His hand ghosts over you back, guiding you across to the computers.

You flirt around the screens, leaning your hands against the metal frame. Joaquin’s hand roams around different radars and dials as he reads them. You watch from your spot as he concentrates, although, his eyes float up to check on you, every so often. You’ll pretend not to notice the suppressed smirk that threatens to rise on his face at your stare. 

You push that brewing anxiety aside but not without strain. Not without a little help from that pure and inviting calm that Joaquin brings.

***

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