an innocent kid:

me:

((I’ve been listening to some Team RR boss themes out of nostalgia and I have never written anything about the Pokémon villains (specifically Generation 1-6 respectively) and I figured I would shower my thoughts on these dudes))

Giovanni

Gonna start off with the one and only Giovanni. He’s a bit tricky to pinpoint, but as a Mafia inspired character, Giovanni works in the shadows. He doesn’t operate out in the open (I mean, obviously) and handles the more business side of things such as negotiations and elaborate planning. He doesn’t care about getting his hands dirty but don’t mistake him for being lazy or incapable of fighting.

As a villain, he’s the most put together. He’s a rational thinker and analyzes situations thoroughly. Not much of an optimist, but very opportunistic however it’s coupled with a hypothetical mindset. Giovanni never settles for one backup plan. He never bites off more than he can chew. He bides his time and attacks when the moment comes.

Obviously views himself highly and expects absolute respect. Has no tolerance for failure, like most other villains (except Archie) and punishes Grunts severely for any indiscretion.

Giovanni is aware of Maxie and Archie as they used to be part of Team Rocket in their early years. He has a low opinion of them, Archie especially for his goofy immaturity and lack of asserting his authority. Still, it does impress Giovanni that these two have managed to make a name for themselves as bosses.

Extremely patient. Giovanni can play the waiting game and he prefers it that way. He hates sloppiness and would rather surveillance his opponents before striking. He’s got eyes everywhere to ensure that no stone is left unturned.

Actually a decent father to Silver, but very much so a deadbeat. Not a lot of contact between the two. However, there were a few instances where they crossed paths but it’s usually brief and contains less pleasantries.

Maxie

Stereotypical nerd alert. Maxie is the epitome of the phrase “well, actually” and comes across as SUPER condescending. He thinks he’s doing people a favor by showering them with his logic and reasoning but really, at times, he’s speaking nonsense. He’s petty whenever Archie is around and does things that irk him, but between the two, Maxie does seem more mature albeit condescendingly. Hell, I’ll just say he’s condescending.

Long standing rivalry with Archie. It’s an amalgamation of being petty, competitive, and all round, goofy. On the outside, the other villains don’t take these two seriously. However, by himself, Maxie is actually calm and low key, so to an extent, he’s favored a bit more than Archie. Still, it doesn’t discredit the fact that this nerd has beef with a wannabe pirate over the expansion of landmass vs water.

Motive wise, the rest of the villains see Maxie and Archie’s motivations as idiotic. Biggest facepalm in motion.

Secretly admires Cyrus but at the same time developed a jealousy towards him. Maxie admires Cyrus’ technical abilities, his masterwork tinkering with machinery, and the like, but harbors resentment that he himself struggles with reaching that level of success and skill.

Archie

Loud, proud, and all round ruthless, this pirate has no qualms in throwing down. Very loose and probably the least threatening boss, Archie embraces the pirate life and shows no real strictness in his methods. He gives everything he has in battle and doesn’t have a serious persona like the other RR members, hence why nobody takes him seriously.

Again, he has beef with Maxie as mentioned prior. Archie thinks Maxie is too uptight about everything and needs to loosen up. Highly competitive (especially with Maxie) so Archie is willing to take on his counterpart any time or day.

Probably the friendliest villain in the Pokémon main line series. He’s approachable and has that chill uncle vibe.

He does the most reckless things out of the group. It doesn’t matter what it is. Archie will do some random things, no matter if he ends up getting hurt. He’s sturdy, he can handle anything.

Cyrus

Cyrus is a shut in, a recluse so to speak. He hates engaging with others and doesn’t like to be bothered. He only comes out of his room when he’s has to, but only related to Team RR business.

A quiet man. Rarely speaks but isn’t shy in throwing in his two cents. Can easily clap back an argument with a couple of sentences effortlessly (he’s good with his words) and uses vocabulary that makes Archie scratch his head.

Doesn’t take much for Cyrus to kill the mood. Hell, just his presence alone dies whatever mood everyone’s feeling down by an inch.

Probably one of the few villains that contemplates their actions (Maxie and Archie being in the same camp). He doesn’t regret his actions, but finds himself wondering if something else had occurred how would the outcome change? It’s clear that he gets on fine with your Rotom-Dex, so there is some soft side to this ice cold, stone faced man.

Aside from Ghetsis, the other RR bosses kind of show some level of genuine concern for Cyrus. Like, man, are you okay? Cyrus doesn’t get hounded mainly for the fact that there’s quite literally nothing to bully him for. He’s silent most of the time and, to put it simply, nihilistic (or depressed in some cases). He’s hard to relate to, but that doesn’t mean that the other RR bosses (except Ghetsis) don’t check up on him. Look, they may be evil bastards, but they don’t mess around when it comes to mental health (except Ghetsis; he can go fuck himself).

Ghetsis

A complete madman in the flesh. Ghetsis is an unstable man and let me say that no one approaches Ghetsis unless they have a death wish. The man’s only best friend is manipulation and that’s all he does. Fortunately, Giovanni is aware of this and uses simple yet effective intimidation tactics to unnerve Ghetsis.

Every Team RR Grunt fears Ghetsis. Enough said.

I completely support the theory about Ghetsis and his Hydreigon attacking him. It fits given that his Hydreigon knows the move Frustration (an attack that increases the more the Pokémon dislikes its Trainer) and has used said move on Ghetsis, causing near fatal injuries.

Linking with the prior point, Ghetsis’ right arm was torn off (by Hydreigon) and replaced with a prosthetic, same with his right eye. There are scars all over his torso and legs. He has some mobility issues but can get by okay without any assistance. He wears cloaks to cover every inch of his body to appear bigger, but in actuality, he’s quite scrawny.

Ghetsis tried, at one point, to manipulate each of the RR bosses. Almost worked on Archie (bc Archie is somewhat gullible) whereas Lysandre and Cyrus knew immediately what cyclops was putting down. Maxie kind of just didn’t care.

Inserts himself way. too. much. Ghetsis cannot stand being pushed aside and prefers to be the center of attention. Dramatic, yes, but I can only imagine that if the conversation doesn’t involve Ghetsis, he’ll make damn sure that it makes it back to him, revenant or not. He’s a narcissist trying to dominant, but Giovanni isn’t having it.

No one knows why Ghetsis appears and acts so cruelly. Some say he was just born to be evil while others pin a complex backstory. It’s been theorized that Ghetsis has an ancient linage; his ancestors ruling over Unova, the Abyssal Ruins being a towering fortress that, for the longest time, ruled with power and swath of knowledge and wisdom. Over time, the ruins sank to the bottom of the ocean, taking the last remnants of the Harmonia name with it, leaving behind Ghetsis to carry on that legacy many years later. Of course, Ghetsis perverts the family name by asserting his own sinister misdeeds, pushing his warped philosophy onto others, like N, with manipulation. The God complex he forms has consumed him to the point where he can barely distinguish reality apart from his own twisted fantasy.

Says some batshit insane things that no one can comprehend. Don’t bother arguing with him; he cannot be reasoned.

Lysandre

This man hides his insanity very well. He carries himself with confidence and pride, so you would never suspect this man having committed regional (or global) genocide.

Has a way with words, similar to Cyrus. He can talk his way out of situations with little to no effort as he’s both eloquent and charming.

Quite favorable with Giovanni and possibly with Cyrus.

Can never tell what he’s thinking. You don’t know if he’s joking or if he’s being serious. It’s a constant coin toss and he’ll keep you on your toes. He finds this trait about himself amusing while others, like Ghetsis and Archie, find it annoying.

Despite how insane and deeply twisted his actions are, Lysandre actually used to be a genuine human being. At some point in his early life, he tried to be giving and helping towards his community and all of Kalos, which did help improve the quality of life in the region. But, over time, the constant pressure of trying to solve every problem has left Lysandre empty and exhausted. He has kept trying to find an excuse to continue his good efforts, but every time it yielded the same results, the same cycle. People take advantage of kindness, people fight and bicker over generosity, and people demand more. Lysandre just… burnt out. He got tired and grew to resent humanity’s unwillingness to accept and appreciate what was being given to them, ruining the beauty of the world by perverting the generosity to match their own needs and desires. It disgusted Lysandre, hence why he chose the destructive path that he did. What other choice he did have?

ok uhhh lets see. now this is partially based on what ive absorbed from you and partially based on what ive absorbed from my friend leo who is also really into sonic

so like sonic is a hedgehog except not really because he is blue and doesn't look anything like a hedgehog and is actually an alien from space. specifically a planet called morbius or something. he goes really fast. i'm not even going to try and recap the plot of it because theres like. an entire video games and a movie and several comic runs so i think trying to recap the plot would be a fools mission. instead i will discuss the characters.

sonic: the hedgehog. blue. very fast. the protagonist so he has to be just some guy so that he will be easily relatable. kind of like spiderman i think.

tails: sonic's little buddy. fox. actually named miles prower (per hour). has several tails. can be a helicopter. deserves the world. your favorite <3

amy: also a fox?? the world's PRETTYEST PINK PRINCESS and she's going to KILL YOU with her HUGE FUCKING HAMMER

rouge: or rogue??? bat. known for not being drawn sexily by doctors. on tumblr dot com. rarity energy i think

shadow: the hedgehog. emo before there was emo. created in a lab by a mad scientest and his best friend maria died. dave strider/zuko avatar for little kids who are going to be furries eventually

silver: shadow's friend i think? gnc swag honestly. they and shadow and rogue/rouge are sort of like team rocket maybe

knuckles: the echidna. no idea what he's doing here

dr. robtonik/eggman: may or may not be the same person?? villains. very weird looking. hate this fucking hedgehog soooo much for some reason

chaos emeralds: important for unclear reasons. maybe whoever gets all of them can do a magical girl powerup? part of why sonic and the egg robot men fight so much.

"There were numerous times when Misty and Brock would self-righteously claim that Ash only got his first two badges out of pity. However, they're exaggerating at best, and lying at worst. Misty's sisters gave Ash the Cascade Badge because he saved their gym from Team Rocket, who attacked in the middle of Ash and Misty's match- which, by the way, Misty technically cheated in. She coddled Pikachu so that it wouldn't want to battle against her, in other words- tampering with her opponent's Pokemon, which is both unsporting and frankly unprofessional. As for Brock, Ash had him and his Onix on the ropes, when Pikachu accidentality set off the gym's fire sprinklers and only relented because Brock's siblings threw a fit and guilt-tripped him into forfeiting. It was Ash who felt sorry for Brock, so he chose not to win when he could have. It's unfair to label Ash as a charity case, when all he did was be the better sportsman, which comes off as Unintentionally Unsympathetic for his two companions, since repeatedly saying that Ash only got their badges out of pity, when he simply showed better sportsmanship than them, can come across as sour grapes for Misty and outright hypocritical for Brock."

Quite frankly, this stinks more of someone who outright hates Misty than an objective analysis. For one thing, Misty never coddled Pikachu. I watched the episode as a kid, repeatedly in fact since it was frequently reruns, and can play it in my head thanks to near-eidetic memory and Misty NEVER coddled Pikachu at all (actually, Pikachu chose of his own volition to not fight Misty. The most Misty did was thank Pikachu for "being a Pika-Pal". Sure, might not have been one of her best moments in one sense, but she didn't convince him not to fight as an easy win. And even IF Misty had somehow coddled Pikachu, THAT'S not cheating, either, since it wasn't against League rules unlike two-on-one battles. And if that's cheating, so is Ash hooking Pikachu up to a run-down water mill plant to effectively give him electric steroids, which is EXACTLY what he did to nearly defeat Brock.). I might as well ALSO point out that Ash saving the gym, while commendable, is hardly a good qualification for actually earning the badge since the entire POINT behind fighting a Gym Leader for the badge, not to mention actually beating them, is specifically to prove your strength and ability to train Pokemon for the Pokemon Leagues, which is first and foremost a fighting tournament. To give a good comparison, in Pokemon Gold and Silver, the player character at one point has to convince Jasmine to resume gym duties, but she refused largely because she needed to care for an ill Ampharos who acted as the lighthouse's power source. The player obviously needs to get secret medicine to fix up Ampharos, and does so. Using the guy's argument, since the player obviously saved the Ampharos, not to mention prevented a full-scale disaster to Olivine City regarding constant shipwrecks as a result of the lighthouse potentially being permanently out of commission due to it possibly dying, Jasmine ought to just give the player the badge then and there. But no, instead, you're STILL required to go to the gym to face her in battle, and win, to earn the badge regardless. Using his argument, Jasmine was also sour grapes. In fact, Blaine made similar arguments later on in the same series, and even after Ash similarly saved at least Cinnabar Gym if not the ENTIRETY of Cinnabar Island under similar circumstances, Blaine made absolutely sure to state that while Ash definitely did a very heroic deed, he nevertheless was NOT going to give him the badge for that reason, and instead was willing to permit him with a rematch, which DID ultimately have Ash actually EARNING the badge in the proper manner. If anything, Misty was being professional regarding that bit, or at least attempting to be. Either way, at least her gripe was somewhat justified since her sisters did just hand Ash the badge and overruled her, and at least she was actually consistent whether sour grapes or not. I will agree in regards to Brock, however, mostly because that unfortunately DOES match up precisely as described, and also is ultimately consistent with my rationale with Misty being justified ultimately. I mean, yeah, sure, I might not agree with the term "pity badge" per-se (since they definitely weren't awarded regarding pity as a motivator. Ironically, Misty actually DID narrowly prevent an ACTUAL instance of pity badges being issued, hence their battle), but Misty's overall point was still very much valid overall since he still never actually earned it by beating the Gym Leader, Misty in this case (and speaking as someone who HATED the concept of "everyone getting a trophy" as a kid, even didn't feel at all good about it if I got a trophy despite literally quitting soccer beforehand, I actually am inclined to agree with Misty and to a lesser extent Brock regarding that bit. Of course, I will admit that if a trainer DID repeatedly abuse his pokemon in a match I don't think they're obligated to get a badge just because they won against a Gym Leader either, but I think that's the only REAL exception regarding winning badges).

MY DAY HAS COME. FINALLY. Thank you for asking the question I've been waiting so long to be asked. I hope you are ready for the can of worms you have just opened because it's going to be a LONG ride. Let's start with Pikachu because his issues are more technical, where as Ash is just a dumbass.

Pikachu should be level like 60 at this point(Thank you Matt Patt for actually doing all the work to figure this out.) and he still can't fight his way out of a paper bag. But Nora, it's a Pokemon show, there are no levels. WRONG. Season 1 Episode 9 "The School of Hard Knocks" The whole episode is basically pokemon school, TLDR they mention levels, weaknesses, ect. So now we know that pikachu is MILES ahead of his competition, but gets bodied at least 40% of the time(Chart of win rates).

But it isn't just Pikachu being reset to the point where he's useless again that's frustrating, but he's also a little prick. There is a whole scene where Pikachu is talking MAD SHIT and Jessie and James are like "Oh he's so cute" and Meowth is curled up in a ball going like "I can't bring myself to tell them what Pikachu is saying"

Also can we talk about how Pikachu should have killed Ash by now? Dude would send 100,000 volts into Ash like every Tuesday.

OK AND NOW THE MAIN EVENT. ASH. GOD HE MAKES ME SO ANGRY. Boi want's to be a pokemon master. IT TOOK HIM 22 YEARS. But we need to back up because that's getting ahead of myself.

Let's start at the very beginning. This man got a Pikachu because he was late, dudebro lives in the pokemon world. Could have had a real starter, but no. He slept in. Get's a Pikachu. Best of luck with the first gym OH WAIT LET ME JUST CHEAT the first gym. Uses an Electric pokemon against a ground type. Yea man, sure. The sprinklers. Regardless of him straight up breaking the laws of pokemon, Brock is even like "Dude we gotta stop this battle. I don't want to hurt your pokemon" and ash IMMEDIATELY disregards this and puts him back into the battle. Ash has proven time and time again he really doesn't actually care about his pokemon(basically replacing his team every single time he goes to a new region and then never uses them ever again).

On the topic of learning nothing from previous events, He falls for Jessie and James costumes. Every. Time. Jessie and James are the Parry the platypus of this universe and it makes me so angry because not ONCE can he see the blue and red hair duo and think. Hmmm. Maybe is Jessie and James. NOT ONCE. Which btw Jessie and James are canonically the worst team rocket members. He removes them, but like a baby has no objects permanence and forgets they exist and the process repeats.

He has 42 pokemon after two decades. I have more pokemon in my copy of silver that I played for like 6 hours. Which then we can bring up the fact that he has 29 TAUROS because he has the awareness of a blind chimp(actually that's not fair, I bet if you gave me 10 minutes I could teach a Mankey to throw a pokeball without hitting a Tauros). To compound this the man doesn't evolve pokemon if they don't want to, which while is actually a really nice thing for him to do(Yay first positive thing he's done) it still makes him a weaker trainer in battles ultimately making his goal of becoming pokemon master SO much harder.

Hey you guys ever remember when Ash absolutely trashed Misty's bike and then never paid her back for it. That was cool.

Moving along we have the fact that not only is he dumb, but he's TURBO DUMB. First episode "Is all you can say is Pikachu?" AS IF HE HASN'T SEEN A POKEMON ONCE IN HIS LIVE. DUDE LIVES WITH A MR. MIME. Have a comp of just the first season of him being a fucking moron. And it's not just like general knowledge like that, he also struggles with typing match ups. WELL INTO future seasons. But even when he has the typing match up he still somehow loses. The only example I need to make is this one. Dudebro CHEATED and got a "Mega" evolution that doesn't even exist because of love(I GUESS?), like this is next level protaganist bullshit. AND HE STILL LOSES WHEN HE'S GOT THE TYPE ADVANTAGE. on a side note, while looking up more things he did wrong, Man apparently almost never uses Items or abilities. How he's made it to finally become a pokemon master is BEYOND me.

1. giovanni was outed as a criminal so naturally whatever house he lived in was probably seized by the police for investigation. given that looker didn't track silver down until three years later, it's pretty safe to say that silver has NOT been living in whatever home he used to have because they didn't find him

2. the entirety of the story takes place in johto and silver is from kanto (probably viridian city because that's where giovanni's gym was but who knows). he doesn't have a pokémon at the beginning of the story that would allow him to fly back and forth from kanto to johto. the magnet train requires a pass to go back and forth between kanto and johto and you have to beat the league before you can ride the s.s. aqua. silver also had no idea where giovanni was, which means he didn't get to johto through tohjo falls. so he either a) snuck past the league reception gate and found a way around tohjo falls when going down routes 26 & 27, or b) snuck past the league reception gate and went over/around mount silver. EITHER WAY, unless he wanted to repeat that every single day, he's pretty much stranded in johto until he gets a flying-type pokémon. without a house.

3. a child can't...run a house and pay the bills by themselves. like even if he COULD via battling for money or whatever, silver doesn't have a pokémon and doesn't get one until he steals a starter from professor elm. how would he pay the bills lmao and how would someone do it for him when the house is probably being investigated

I think this will be the last individual spoiler post. After Red, the entirety of the plot would’ve been given away. Individual experiences would vary of course, so the remaining Dex Holders would just be grouped up so that the few Dex Holders who don’t do jack sh*t and/or die early don’t take a whole post.