We need Tamaris in some human AUs now. The longtime cook for the wealthy Endless family, the one who stealthily slipped forbidden cookies and hot cocoa to a tiny Dream, who let him hide in her kitchen from his neglectful parents and bickering siblings throughout his tumultuous childhood, curling up under her table or in her pantry with a blanket and a book and a steady stream of snacks.
She's the only one in the entire damn house that Dream is excited to introduce Hob to when he inevitably brings him home to meet the family. Maybe he even steals her away when he sets up his own home.
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Wonderful news, gang! I finished the new Fulgrim book!
Gonna put the review I put on audible under the cut, plus some assorted notes I was taking while listening
Spoilers ahead
Assorted notes (plus commentary):
bitter bitch fighting is what Iâm here for lmao
oh I see what yâall meant with Fulgrimâs ex LMAO
take a shot every time they say perfection. Youâll die by the end
I know Iâm on, like, chapter 2, but I missssssss Juliuuuuuuus whereâs my (second) favorite 1st captain pspspspsps (I complain about this again later and I get these characters are probably just off doing other things/Lucius and Eidolon have their own books BUT COME ON, at least MENTION THEM)
oh I canât believe this
no sorry but âthis is not perfection this is excessâ is such a cheesy fucking line
FROM A TRIED AND TRUE EC??? WHAT???
okay but âMy father has his champion after all. Why should I deny myself the same?â IS SUCH A LINE
oh to be Fulgrimâs cup bearer
CHRIST BUT FULGRIM IS GAY WITH HIS ASTARTES JESUS
well wow you guys really werenât joking, they ARE exes
terms of endearment? Such close intimacy? ARE YOU KIDDING ME MS. REID? (Mauvais and Fulgrim were so. Just so)
why arenât Lucius, Eidolon, Julius etc. here. You know. Slaneeshâs/Fulgrimâs ACTUAL CHAMPIONS (again, see my earlier notes on this. Also I donât know if Julius is even still around. Nobody tell me, Iâll live in ignorant bliss)
âA sharp breath forced itself into [his] lungsâ is a killer line
âAs if they were lovers falling into each otherâs arms instead of sworn enemiesâ HELLO???? (Johannes and Tamaris shouldâve made out)
Johannes could tell Tamaris his fucking name
rude as fuck (I didnât like Johannes all that much, can you tell?)
also if Tamaris dies Iâm killing someone
[insert Iâve only had him for a day and a half but if anything happens to him I will kill everyone in this room and then myself]
this might change, he does annoy me sometimes (it doesnât. Heâs my boy)
OH TO BE LIFTED OFF THE GROUND BY AN ASTARTES TO BE EYE TO EYE WITH THEM
KISS ME WHILE YOUâRE AT IT SIR WHY DONT YOU (they make the Astartes hot on purpose I swear to you)
I like Tamaris, I do. He has something human about him that not many Astartes do, methinks (this bites me in the ass later, iykyk)
âYou understand nothing of what was once between usâ COME ON MAAM ARE YOU KIDDING ME
will this be my reaction every time it is insinuated that theyâre exes? Yes
âand then his love for me fadedâ HELLO????
I love The Three. Literally not they/them (gender neutral) but they/them (multiple). Hilarious
Tamaris could stand to be,,, more eccentric? And obviously. Not enough Fulgrim. Not NEARLY enough Fulgrim. What is it lately with Primarch books with too little of their Primarchs in them? (I read Sanguiniusâ Primarch novel before this, where heâs also sorely lacking in appearances)
But other than that. Iâm really enjoying her writing
but I might also be biased because the narrator is FIRE (he is, itâs the first time Iâm hearing him, but Andrew James Spooner is killer, I can provide some examples)
oh Venakhar will betray the Perfecti, wonât he (spoilers: he will. I called that)
oh to be a naked serf sitting by Fulgrimâs side
yknow, while Fulgrim isnât in it a lot, but when he is, is presence overshadows everything else
âWhen was the last time you saw someone draw? Sing? Make something?â Oh,,,, no,,,, I get it,,,,,,, (I didnât care for the human POV but this line had something to it)
For the next bit, Iâd just like to:
(Wasnât a good time)
oh to be a cultist taking care of a heavily injured Chaos AstartesâŠ..
The Black Templar as Fulgrimâs champion would go kinda hard ngl (wouldnât it? I know itâs never gonna happen but man, that would make for one hell of a book or short story)
YO TAMARIS LETS GOOO!!!
Tamaris makes me feel some sort of way I swear (I love him)
GET HIM TAMARIS BABE
Tamaris kissing Venakharâs decapitated head,, thatâs,,, oh boy,,, I had to stop the audiobook, Jesus Christ
MORE OF THAT
why couldnât this entire book have been this insane
is heretic the only insult Johannes knows istg
GET HIM BABY LETS GOOOOO TAMARIS
YES TAMARIS BABY
MY BELOVED
a rare win for chaos lets GO (I donât actually know if a win for chaos is rare but)
I donât know how happy I am with this ending
hm. Well. At least Fulgrimâs back (which really, sums up really well how I feel about this book)
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