#system management

[ * CUSTOM FIELD IDEAS... ]

...that prioritize learning about a alter's functioning as well as internal communication. This can also be used as a list of things to write down about your headmates/parts/alters/whatever! ^-^

Some fields will contain screenshots of ways I've used these specific fields in the past, and templates. Screenshots will be of Simply Plural, but nothing here will be SP specific. This is a long ass post so beware of that.

In our last post I discussed the pressure we felt to present our system a certain way, something I'm sure is prevalent in online spaces as well. So as part of undoing this belief system we've been redoing our simply plural.

In very few posts have we seen advice on sorting simply plural and custom fronts or profile layouts to prioritise communication and functioning. So here's the changes we've made, if anyone wants well share an example of a whole alter profilem

Main Things We've Added To Custom Fields:

More private sections, to detail roles and take related to it, triggers, fusion, dormancy and etc updates

A system to categorise general amnesia barriers between individual alters and everyone else (taken from the BASK structure of memories as seen in a post by @granulesofsand)

A section for wants and needs, to highlight anything that people need externally (mainly physical items)

A section for goals. These are three questions people answer as they want. We also added a "clearance" section to specify who can view this part

1. What are your goals for yourself?

2. What goals do you think the system should work towards?

3. What is something you think needs improvement?

Of course, you can do whatever kind of questions you need, but we found it a really helpful section

A section for coping skills, and any safety plans in place for the alter

Disorder Info, all of us have the same mental health issues but in this section it gives an opportunity to specify which aspect may affect someone the most/least to help specify what someone may need

Limiting what people can pick as an avatar. We had problems with people purposely changing them, or being uncomfortable with them as they tried to make them attractive to others especially our irls. To prevent this we've limited the picrews they can choose and are encouraging picking it like a pfp, with a section for alternative face claims (which can be anything they want) in cf

Example screenshots are below the cut!

WOW. 17 people at once is... a lot. That must've been (and probably continues to be) very overwhelming for you guys. Are you doing ok after all that?

System management/managers typically refers to a headmate (or headmates) that handles things such as:

facilitating switches

controlling memory access

keeping track of who's fronted/split/fused/gone dormant

delegating tasks to the corresponding headmates

etc.

They're frequently gatekeepers, caretakers, internal self helpers, and similar roles in addition to being managers, but those terms tend to overlap depending on the circumstances.

Like anything else, it comes down to personal identity and preference. Also, some systems have these members, while others are perfectly functional without them.

They're pretty common in large systems, but we personally have had our manager, Vivian, from the time we were very little (bodily around age 4 to 6). She takes care of a lot of stuff behind the scenes for us. I think she may have written a post or two on this blog, and she's helping me write this one as well.

Hope this cleared up some stuff! You're perfectly welcome to follow up whenever you feel like it. :)

It makes us scared that like some people who love fronting won't get a chance to anymore because like there's almost 20 of us at this point and we can't just constantly switch out or nobody will have more than like 5 mins of fronting time. Not to mention it's just generally kinda stressful like "will the brain make another headmate of this character in media we really like even though some of us haven't been able to front in weeks resulting in even less of a chance for them to front? Dunno i kinda hope not"

So I guess the question is how do I slow down the making of headmates and how do we manage to make a chance for more of us to front without constantly switching?

Oh dear, I’m afraid we don’t have an easy answer for how to slow down the making of headmates. If you are not consciously choosing to create headmates (through say, willogenic means, thoughtforms, or something else), and if your brain is splitting alters unconsciously, either as a form of neurodiversity or a result of a complex dissociative disorder, we genuinely can’t provide advice on halting this process. Alters can split for a variety of reasons, and it really can’t be controlled by any individual in the system - it’s something that happens unconsciously as a coping mechanism.

Here’s some things you can do that may help:

- seek therapy. A therapist might be able to help you pinpoint areas of stress and develop healthier coping mechanisms. In many systems, splitting may result from being overwhelmed/facing trauma, so learning how to cope with these events may help prevent new headmates from forming.

- you can also learn coping skills on your own, without therapy. Practice grounding/reorienting, figure out what helps you feel safe, and avoid what makes you overwhelmed. If you notice you’re splitting new headmates in particular situations, try to avoid those or think of better ways to cope in the moment.

- have an inner-meeting to see who is most capable of handling stress, and see if they can front during difficult times. If stronger headmates front in overwhelming moments, it may help keep the brain from deeming a split necessary.

Our host also struggles with the fact that there are so many of us inside; he has moments when he worries he’ll never be able to front again. The plight for individual agency and autonomy is not lost on us - every headmate likely wants and deserves to front in order to make their own decisions in the real world.

(We haven’t tried it) but some systems create a fronting schedule, which allows other headmates to rotate in and out throughout the week. Maybe something like this would be beneficial for your system? Additionally, divvying up tasks between headmates may ensure that others can front in order to take care of the body and have some quality fronting time.

Our system has a gatekeeper (or system manager) who has the final say on who fronts. She is able to facilitate switches, and has been a great help in ensuring no one headmate fronts longer than the rest, and allowing those who don’t front often to front when they like. Does your system have a member who fits this role? If so, could you ask them to help in facilitating switches so other members can be afforded time to front?

We hope something here proves to be beneficial for you and your system. Our apologies for not having better advice! Regardless, we wish you and your system peace, harmony, and cooperation in the future.

hi,

we're a system. kee (xe/xem/xyr) is the host, and the rest of us won't disclose our roles. i'm phoenix (he/him/his and agender), and y'all might also see alexander (he/him/his or it/its) and axel (he/him/his or xe/xem/xyr) around.