#superman headcanons

clark kent never took his glasses off around you. he couldn't.

because what would you think of him after finding out he's been hiding his true nature from you this entire time? you have been dating for months! you'd see him as a monster, a devil!

and, to be fair, you've never even bothered to ask him to remove his glasses—he's a dork with bad vision? cute. the glasses fit him anyway, why complain?

and you like them even more when they fog up as he eats you out, your eyelids spasming when his tongue slides out of your sticky hole and glide towards your sensitive clit, glasses crooking with the sudden buck of your hips.

Clark finds out about Robin's existence when a ten year old Dick Grayson in full Robin gear breaks into his apartment at two in the morning and shakes him awake because Batman's missing and Alfred's away and Bruce taught him that, in the case of emergency, Superman was one of the only people he could trust. Bruce just didn't think to tell Clark that he was, by all means, his son's emergency contact.

Clark: -wakes up to a small boy that he's never seen or heard of before in a cape and a mask with lenses that reflect light like a cat's perched on the edge of his bed in a pitch black room-

Random thoughts. idk i'm bored. the ending might be cringeeeee. someone send me asks my inbox is so quiet...jk there's loads of requests...but still...?

Mentions of smut, mdni! <33

Clark Kent who was a stuttering mess trying to ask you out, too oblivious to see your heart eyes around him.

Clark Kent who took you on four dates before kissing you, and another three before asking to be your boyfriend. He later admits he’s wanted to kiss you since the day you dropped all your paperwork in front of him, your first day, 16 months ago.

Clark Kent who sleeps with you on the night of your two month anniversary. He wanted it to be romantic, and he wanted it to be fully your idea, no pressure!

Clark Kent who is soo vocal in bed. You feel so so so good and he’s been waiting so long he just has to tell you how good he feels.

Clark Kent who wholeheartedly believes in aftercare, which honestly lasts longer than the sex. He runs baths, gets you a drink, a snack, changes the sheets, gets you some comfy pjs (his boxers and an old college shirt)

Clark Kent who starts getting very bold once you have sex, because once you’ve started, he can’t get enough.

Clark Kent who loves pinching your ass as you walk by, only to look completely innocent when you whip your head towards him.

Clark Kent who gets you flowers every Sunday without fail.

Clark Kent who loves picking you up whenever he can, over the shoulder, up against his chest, in his arms, he just loves holding you!

Clark Kent who never lets you plan a single date, ever! It’s either dinner at the restaurant you like, the museum, the movie theatre, a picnic, dinner at his place, a weekend away.

Clark Kent who tells you he’s Superman almost immediately because he can’t keep a secret from you. He’s riddled with guilt and loves you too much to lie to you.

Loves you?…Wait what!?

Oh yeah!

Clark Kent who tells you he loves you two nights after becoming your boyfriend. He just can’t keep it in! And bonus, he’s lucky you love him too.

Warnings: Smut, fluff, fem!reader, | WC: 1000+

✦ Chronically Offline!Clark when... you walk into a room, and he’s looking over his phone, eyes squinted as if he doesn’t have telescopic vision. His fingers tap at the too-small phone screen, his tongue caught between his teeth as uncertainty furrowed his brow, missing the buttons by accident and resetting his progress on his Instagram post. “Sweetheart?” He looks up and gives you a guilty grin. “Hi, honey… can you help me make a post? I forgot how.” You shake your head, sitting down as he hands his phone over with no protest. The photo was a picture of you from your date the other night. You cock an eyebrow at him. “Why are you posting me?” you asked with a smile. “Why don’t you post both of us?” He shrugged, “Because this is my favorite picture. Look at your smile!’ Your heart melted a little. You leaned over, sneaking a kiss to his arm before hitting post. Curious, you tapped on his profile. Last post: 100 weeks ago. A blurry photo of his family at Christmas. Three likes on it, and one of them was himself.

✦ Chronically Offline!Clark when... he’s always in charge of selfies because his arms are longer. When you look back at his camera roll, he has duplicates of every selfie you’ve ever taken together. Half of them are blurry, cutting you out of the photos, facing the wrong way, or blocked entirely by his thumb. Once you had found a video that was over a minute long of him trying to take a selfie, the reflection of himself in his glasses, his brows pinched in focus, your voice echoing in the background, patiently talking him through it.

“Clark! You make sure you press the little white button, and don’t put your thumb over it!” You could hear your laughter in the back as he grinned, his dimples dipping into his cheeks. “What? You don’t like looking at my thumbs?” he had teased, laughter bubbling up from his chest. 

✦ Chronically Offline!Clark when... you ask him to do a TikTok trend, lip-syncing to a sound, and he looks at you, confused. “Okay… So, I’m gonna pick you up, put you on my shoulder, while you sing?” he asked, looking down at you as you set up the camera. “Oh yeah, it’ll be a hit, just trust me!” you insisted, setting up a timer and looking back at him. “I always trust you, honey. Start it,” Clark said, voice calm as he stood exactly where you told him to. You pressed play, listening to the timer tick down until the sound started. “A boy who’s jacked and kind,” fills the room, and you back into him, his big hands splaying over your stomach as he lifts you with ease up onto his shoulder. His hand stayed to secure you, his eyes looking up at you with admiration that Hollywood could never recreate. You giggle, your lips moving to the sound, hand in his hair. When the sound is over, he sets you down, watching you rush to post it, making him smile.

The video went viral, getting almost a million likes! In bed, you scrolled through the comments with him. His favorite comment was, “Oh, he’s in LOVE!” and another, “He looks like a puppy.” Clark smiled to himself because he was shamelessly both those things for you.

✦ Chronically Offline!Clark when... he comes home from work setting his briefcase down on the floor and toeing off his shoes before lining them up neatly. He steps into your apartment, the summer sun shining through the windows and warming up the intimate space. You came from the bedroom, sports bra and workout shorts, fresh from the gym. “Hi!” you exclaim, moving to plant a kiss on his face. “Sorry, all sweaty.” Clark shrugged it off, looking you up and down, an appreciative glint in his eyes “Wow, you look… Um—how do you say it? You cooked?” he asked, his head tilted and embarrassment started creeping up his neck. You laughed, burying your face in his chest. “Where’d you learn that, Clark?” He kissed the top of your head—it was obviously Cat, she knew that lingo better than anyone and used it to confuse poor Clark. “Cat,” he grumbles, looking into your eyes, confusion there. “Well thats not quite how you use that one.” Your hand went up to his hair, smoothing a hand through his curls. “Body Tea?” Clark tried again, and your threw your head back in laughter. “Sure, that one works,” you rubbed his arm watching his brain work overtime. 

✦ Chronically Offline!Clark when... he voice types, too busy to type out a well thought out text. When he’s typing up an article, or walking through the crowded streets, Clark talks into his phone. “Do you need anything from the store? I’m passing by on the way home…” and at the end of every text it’d say, ‘Stop’ or ‘Please stop’. A glimpse into how Clark talked to his phone, but you hardly seemed to notice after around a month of texting him.

✦ Chronically Offline!Clark when... he can’t read tones over text. No punctuation makes him think your upset. His texts are always perfectly punctuated, spelled, and with little emojis that remind you he’s a millennial. Whenever you used the crying emoji instead of the laughing emoji? He sprung into action. “Are you okay?” or “What happened?” Texting him was difficult all around; he answered quicker on phone call most of the time. 

✦ Chronically Offline!Clark when... you sneakily set up a camera when he comes home, aimed at the front door. ‘Seeing how long it takes him to melt’ trend, knowing not in a million years that he would have seen it. So, you waited and waited; the minute he stepped into the door, you had him hold his arms out, leaving him confused as you kissed him, deep kisses that made his heart flutter. His hands dropped down to your sides, folding in three seconds; his lips moved over yours with a gentle devotion, still firm and almost commanding, completely oblivious to the camera looking at him and the sweet intent behind the kissing. Clark scooped you up under the thighs, one hand moving to start pulling up your shirt and letting his hand roam. It felt too good to stop him.

he lets you win arm wrestling matches all the time. he fakes strain so convincingly you actually think you’ve got him—until one day, mid-match, you catch the tiniest smirk twitch at his lips.

“wait a damn minute—”

“what?” he laughs, acting innocent.

you slap his shoulder. “you’re faking?”

“wouldn’t dream of it,” he teases, letting you pin his hand again. “you’re just… strong.”

you’re always checking on him after missions, especially after he saves a city, lands a plane, or tanks an explosion. you’ll cup his face and search his eyes, even when there’s no scratch on him.

“i’m okay,” he’ll whisper every time. “you don’t have to worry.”

“i do worry, clark. you live a dangerous life.”

and he’ll just smile softly, brushing a hand over your cheek. “i’ll always make it back home to you.”

he thinks about proposing constantly. every time you fall asleep on his chest, every time you wake him up with a kiss, every time you run your hands through his curls and call him “baby” like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

but he’s scared—terrified—that bringing you deeper into his life could put you in danger.

he keeps little mementos of you everywhere—a photo of you at the planet, in his wallet, a pair of your earrings in the glove compartment of his truck, your favorite lotion tucked into his overnight bag. and he always smells like you after a night together—warm, soft, familiar.

and in the bedroom, he holds back—until you tell him not to.

there’s a night where you’re straddling him, mouth at his neck, and you say, “you don’t have to be gentle with me, you know.”

and something in him snaps—in the best way.

his hands clamp tight on your thighs, his voice gets low, and he flips you under him so fast the headboard groans.

Bruce: *sitting at the bat computer* 🤨

Clark: *In a National Geographic voice* He spends his day protecting his cubs, and watching over his territory.

Bruce: *turns to look at Clark* 🤨

Clark: *In a National Geographic voice* Don’t get to close to quick, he is easily spooked and will disappear into the shadows for days.

Bruce: 😑

Clark: *In a National Geographic voice* But don’t let his scary exterior fool you. He may be a scary lion on the outside, but on the inside he’s just a little kitten.

Bruce: What are you doing?

Clark: Me and Damien just came back from the zoo 😁

Bruce: And you’re narrating me because..?

Clark: Because you’re just a kitten wanting to be loved and I shall be the one to protect your heart!

Bruce: …

Clark: ..and because we were planning to watch National Geographic and Dami wanted you to watch it with us ☺️

Bruce: …

Bruce: ok

Clark: *In a National Geographic voice* The mighty lion is on the move to spend time with his youngest cub and his lover

Bruce: Stop

Someone's tractor gets stuck and nothing can get it out? "Be a dear and run down to the Kents, would you? Ask for Clark?"

"Why Clark, we need a machine--"

"Run along now."

note: he's in his mid-thirties, and you're in your early twenties (or anything you want). can be read as an unofficial sequel to he's touch starved. just a little something for today since my next fic might take some time. kind of nervous posting this omg but i hope you guys enjoy! tags: size difference, soft dom clark (non sexual), age gap, ditzy+scatterbrained f! reader, clark & reader are coworkers, no plot, just pure fluff

୨ৎ even before dating, clark acted like the best boyfriend — to you only. he would walk you home after work, walking the side of the road, and he wouldn't touch you, not yet, but his hand would hover on your back, gently guiding you without even having to touch you, even if he so desperately wanted to.