Summary: Everyone acts like Brendon Park has no heart and most days, he agrees. Until one neonatologist looks right through him with no idea who he is. Then he finds out just how fragile bones and hearts can be. Or how Brendon Park falls in love with you. (5.5k)
Pairing: Brendon "the Shark" Park x neonatologist!fem!reader
TW: Sunshine x grumpy trope; patient loss; angst; fluff; Park is down bad; Reader had ADHD; medical inaccuracies; smut; reader's nickname is Candy; mentions of wearing a backpack for a getaway if someone grabs it (I recommend you do this); 18+ because of a short sex scene although it's not descriptive really; Park is a dick and down bad; reader makes him work for it.
Credit: GIF made by @siratonin
Requested: Yes. Osteomyelitis article used for research in this fic, here
Bones break, thatâs reality. Bones are strong but even they have a breaking point, something you canât push past, fragile in a way. Hearts are the same wayâstrong up to a point but after that, then theyâre fragile, so fragile. And theyâre a lot harder to piece back together.
            The babies are small, smaller than Brendon thought, nearly impossibly small, their fingers like specs of dust, their faces smushed and tiny, bodies not even as long as his forearm. He knew logically that babies are small, neonates even more so, but there is a difference between logic and reality. Even the strongest of logic can falter in the face of reality, especially a reality like this. Where whatâs real seems like it shouldnât be.Â
            The one heâs looking at right now, has tiny eyes closed, fists raising upwards at the concealed glass bassinet that holds it, tubes and wires and medical gear all around it, a monitor beeping out a steady, fast rhythm of a heartbeat.Â
            He knows that its bones are even smaller, soft and malleable, that ossification wonât have started yet, the bones mere cartilage really, hard enough but soft enough too. He remembers learning about paradoxes in his high school English class, but he didnât understand it until now, looking at the baby here. These babies are paradoxes, fragile and yet not, strong yet not, malleable yet not.Â
            Heâs never been here on this floor, the one reserved for the NICU, the place most doctors avoid if they can help it, the sight of babies, the most innocent and delicate things fighting for their life too much for most. It takes a special kind of person, he believes, to handle losing these kids, knowing that sometimes you just canât save them. It takes a special kind of person to keep coming back here.Â
            âCan I help you?â he hears a voice behind him, one that rings strong and true and yet bright and light at the same time. He turns around, gaze trailing as he does so, taking in the matching bassinets and the babies all hooked up to machines that keep them living, his heart breaking in particular when he sees a baby on dialysis. He lifts his gaze to you, a woman with arms crossed over bright pink scrubs decorated with lollipops.Â
            âIâmââ he begins, but your face brightens as you take him in, the scowl shifting to a smile as you interrupt him.Â
            âOh, uh, youâre ortho, right?â you say and he nods, swallowing hard, his mouth going dry as you step towards him, your hand outstretched. He takes it, your skin soft against his hand, shocks spearing through his nerves at your touch, listening as you say your name, the sound pretty and perfect and suited to you. ââŚbut everyone calls me Dr. Candy,â you finish.Â
            âIâmâŚâ he pauses, glancing off at the delicate children all around, the ones you deal with as an attending neonatologist and he realizes he doesnât want you to know him as the rest of the hospital knows him, as Park the Shark. It doesnât fit here in this quiet, special place full of life. âYou can call me Dr. Brendon,â he tells you and you nod, turning and walking away while he remains rooted to the floor, watching as you go.Â
            âCome on, Dr. Brendon,â you call out, glancing over your shoulder, âthe patientâs this way.â He follows after you, smoothing his suddenly damp palms on his scrub pants, his steps just slightly hurried as he catches up to you as you stop before a bassinet, your palm pressing against the glass as if youâre touching the small child within.Â
            âThe call said something about advanced osteomyelitis,â he says, his words drawing your attention back to him, your expression turning solemn as you nod, taking the iPad from the side of the table, swiping and clicking on a chart, passing it over to him.Â
            âThis is Brandy Michaels,â you tell him, âweâve been treating her osteomyelitis with antibiotics and antimicrobials. She presented with the second form of presentation, that of sepsis-like symptoms accompanied by temperature instability, feeding intolerance, irritability and reduced movement. It progressed to fever and local swelling at which point we tested her CRP and erythrocyte sedimentation rates and found that they were elevated. We treated, as stated, with antibiotics and antimicrobials as decreed in the protocol. We also performed bone scintigraphy and MRI, finding high evidence for osteomyelitis. Unfortunately, this little one hasnât improved on her regimen over the past two weeks.â
            Brendon could listen to you speak forever, your voice high and light and pretty, your hand resting against the glass of BrandyâsâŚhome as if itâs her, as if itâs giving her comfort. He scans the charts, taking in the notice of the five affected bones, the sites of manifestation and looks up at you, his lips pressing together.Â
            âIâll book the OR for her,â he whispers, handing the iPad back to you, watching as your expression falls, your bottom lip trembling just slightly as you nod, your chest moving just a bit as you draw in breath, trying to make it seem like youâre not. âThe abscesses need to be drained,â he tells you, his tone softer than itâs ever been, soft for only you.Â
            âI know, Dr. Brendon,â you tell him, lips pressing into a thin-lipped smile. âIt just never gets easier this job. Thank you, now, if youâll excuse me, I have to go inform this little oneâs parents.â You nod once more at him, spinning on your heel, the soles of your bright pink shoes squeaking on the polished floor as you do so.Â
            Brendon is surprised by hard it is to watch you walk away, the first doctor to see him without seeing him.Â
            He resolves to see you again. Somehow, someway. It just doesnât feel like the storyâs done yet.
            âDo you know what that was?!â you hear Ava cry, her voice loud, too loud for your quiet space, the one place that focus is easy, that everything seems to align. The place you belong.Â
            âThe ortho consult I called for?â you ask, glancing over your shoulder at your hectic, chaotic friend, her dyed red hair loose around her shoulders, frizzing from the heat outside.Â
            âThat was Park the Shark!â she hisses, reaching you, her acrylic nailed fingers digging into the skin of your forearm as she walks with you, your steps in sync like always.Â
            âWho?â you ask, attention snagging on one of the monitors for your patients, the sight of the hiccup in the line enough to derail you, the destination you had in mind fading for the moment as you stop, checking on the small, precious baby.Â
            âPark the Shark,â Ava repeats as you slide your hands into the gloved areas attached to the sealed bassinet, reaching in, gloved thumb stroking the babyâs cheekbone as you reattach the sliding wire causing the change on the monitor. âThe super-hot, sexy ortho surgeon who scares everyone in the hospital cause heâs all mean and nasty only increasing his rom-com lead charm?â she continues, the end of her sentence lilting into a question as if she expects you to understand right away despite the phrasing.Â
            âBut heâŚwasnât mean,â you tell her, sliding your hands from the gloves and turning back to her, your brows knitting together, the image of the man with his awed expression for the babies superimposing over reality for a moment before you blink it away, focusing back on your best friend and her darkening cheeks.Â
            âThatâs cause that man wants you,â she says, her tone clear and heavy with innuendo. âThat man wants your cookie bad, my friend.â
            âShut up!â you tell her, stepping away from the bassinet, feeling that familiar confusion, the one that comes with not knowing what you were doing before distraction.Â
            âYou were going to tell the Michaels babyâs parents about the surgery,â Ava prompts and you can feel that familiar relief that comes from her picking up on your silent cues and returning to you to the real world.Â
            âThank you,â you tell her, taking her hand and giving it a squeeze before running off down the hall towards the parentâs room where Riley and Jesse will be waiting for updates on their daughter.Â
            But as you go, as you approach them and tell them whatâs happening, what needs to happen and they cry, folding in on each other, holding each other up as they thank you, you wonder.Â
            You wonder what Dr. Brendonâs arms would feel like holding you up when the tears made it impossible to stay up on your own.Â
            Brendon doesnât know why heâs here, doesnât entirely know why he came back only that he liked the fact that you saw him and not the idea that has been built up in the hospital to the point heâs practically an urban legend. He doesnât entirely know why he bribed the red-headed nurse for your coffee order, promising to bring her one as well, hers already dropped off, only that he did.Â
            And now he waits with sweaty palms, two cups of coffee from the shop down the street from the hospital in his hands as he waits for you to arrive. Heâs curious too, to what scrubs youâll be wearing today.Â
            âWhat are you doing on my floor again, Dr. Brendon?â he hears you call out and he turns around, swallowing hard again as he takes in your appearance, your lips glossed and shimmering in the light, light blue scrubs decorated with rainbows on, your badge on your pants rather than your chest like everyone else and your arms crossed, hip cocked out.Â
            âCoffee,â he says, the words said far too fast and far too loudly as he holds out the clear plastic cup holding an iced crackle (whatever that is) coffee. The condensation on the cheap plastic beads and slides from the cup, dripping onto the floor so, maybe his palms arenât all that sweaty after all or even if they are, at least he has an excuse.Â
            âFor me?â you ask him, stepping closer, crossing the room to him and taking the proffered cup from him as he nods, swallowing again at your proximity, at the way you smell like citrus candy. Maybe thatâs why they call you Dr. Candy. You lift the cup to your lips, pursing around the lime green straw and drawing liquid up as you hollow your cheeks in a way that has Brendon feeling like heâs burning up. âHowâd you know my coffee order?â
            âWould you believe a lucky guess?â he asks, adjusting his stance, shifting weight from the left to the right. All you do in response is raise your eyebrows until he nods, just once, understanding. âYeah,â he says, âI didnât think you would. I bribed a nurse to tell me your order.â
            âOut of curiosity,â you begin, your eyes flicking from him to a sight in the NICU, in the glass behind him, âdid this nurse have bright red hair, dark eyes, glittery skin and really annoying acrylic nails?â
            âI donât know if the nails were annoying, but yes,â he says. âAll it took was getting her a coffee too, why?â But youâre already walking away, expression in a faux kind of scowl as you lift a hand in a wave, glancing over at him, the scowl changing briefly to a smile as you call out, âsee you around!â before disappearing behind the tall glass doors.Â
            âYeah,â he whispers, âsee you around.â
            âYouâre back!â you call out, crossing the room, heart beating faster with excitement when you see Brendon standing before the door to the NICU, two cups in his hands again. Heâs been coming every day for the past three weeks, offering small bits of conversation before you each disappear to the jobs that consume you.Â
            âI am,â he replies, the corner of his lip tugging up in a smile as he holds out your cup, the one that holds the dark chocolate crackle coffee, the cup decorated with frozen chocolate that you crack into the coffee. âI have to ask,â he says, his eyes trailing over your body, everywhere his eyes linger heating up beneath your lime green and neon pink scrubs, the ones decorated with watermelons, âwhatâs with the scrubs?â
            âOh!â you exclaim, your voice rising as your eyebrows lift, excitement rising in you making your heart rate fast and your breaths choppier. âNeoâs pretty lax because, I mean, if youâre down here, youâre here for one reason, right? Thereâre no real codes, itâs kind of just the NICU so weâre given free reign unlike the rest of the departments. You know surgery is purple and EM is blackâŚneoâŚweâre the wild child of the hospital.â
            âWhat about peds?â he asks, lifting his cup to his mouth, taking a sip of what must still be a scalding flat white, your eyes following the trail it takes down his throat, momentarily distracted, his question slipping away.Â
            âSorry,â you say, âwhat was the question?â
            âI asked, what about peds?â he says and you nod again, smiling at him, the kind of smile you have that apologizes while also doesnât. It says Iâm me and sorry if you donât like it.
            âPeds is allowed patterns but theyâre told the base colours they have to wear,â you tell him. âSee peds surgery has to have a base of light pink, peds general is light blue, peds oncology is lime green and peds EM is, unfortunately, just black. No patterns, no nothing. It doesnât matter how much I argue with management, it doesnât change. But these kids! Theyâre meeting their doctor who wears black like the fucking grim reaper!â Your rant cuts off when you hear the deep chuckle of Brendon, blinking back into focus as you take in the sight of him and his unfairly hot, Greek god body, shoulders shaking as he tries to suppress his laughter.Â
            âSomething funny, Park?â you ask him, crossing your arms, the condensation from the coffee cup, slick on your hand.Â
            âNo, nope,â he says, his face still split into a smile, the kind that sets your heart aflutter. âI just like listening to you.â
            And you can feel your entire body burn at his words, no one having ever said that to you before.
            âAre you free tonight?â Park asks you, the feeling of his heart in his throat and trembles in his hands all new to him. You bring out nerves in him like no one ever has before.Â
            âDepends,â you tell him, shouldering your bag on your back, one strap on your shoulder, the other loose. You say itâs safety, if someone grabs it, you can just slip out of it, the thought of you getting hurt causing his chest to constrict and blood to pulse in his head every time.Â
            âOn what?â he asks, his hand reaching for yours, the habit something built up over the past two weeks where bringing coffee migrated to walking with you out to the parking lot, seeing you safely to your car. It helps him sleep at night, knowing that youâre safe.Â
            âIf youâre finally asking me out or not,â you tell him and he pauses, his reflection distorted as it stares back at him from the shiny metal doors of the elevator, the distorted expression of shock and disbelief and happiness almost comical.Â
            âI was planning on it,â he says, his tone stilted, slightly nervous as you turn to him, your face split in the most beautiful smile heâs ever seen as you bounce on your toes, excited, hands clapping once as you nod, teeth sinking into your glossed bottom lip.Â
            âThen yes,â you tell him, your voice high with excitement. âIâm free.â
            âPick you up at seven?â he asks as the elevator doors ding open, the two of you slipping on, hands still joined.Â
            âYeah,â you tell him, leaning forwards and pressing a soft kiss against his cheek. âSee you at seven.â
            âYou have not lived,â you tell him, dragging him over with you across the grass towards the taco truck, set up for the movie night, âuntil youâve had a taco from here.â
            âOkay,â he says, his hand, warm and large and firm, calloused in a way that has your heart jumping in your throat at the way it feels against you, âthen let me live.â You canât help but laugh a little, a breathy kind of chuckle, a nervous kind of giggle as you drag him up to the order window.Â
            âCan I order for you?â you ask him quickly, glancing back at him as he nods, lips curving up in that pleased smirk he has, the one that always makes you want to kiss him even when you never have before.Â
            âOf course, Candy,â he says and you swallow hard on instinct, never having been called just candy. Youâve been Dr. Candy since you were a med student, known for your sweet attitude, but also an attitude that is never the same, like each piece of candy is unique from any other. But no oneâs ever just called you candy; youâve never had a real nickname before.Â
            And you really like it.Â
            âTwo number threes, please,â you say, your free hand pulling your wallet from the pocket of your skirt, the one that you and Ava spent hours adding to the vintage find, the one that seems like vintage Stevie Nicks.Â
            âNuh-uh, Candy,â Brendon says, pulling you back by your joined hands. âWhat kind of man would I be if I let you pay on the date? I feel bad enough that weâre not going to a restaurant.â
            âI didnât want a restaurant!â you cry, slapping his chest with indignation. âIâve been excited for this movie in the park for months!â
            âThen Iâm paying,â he says, his eyes darkening in a way that makes you understand why heâs called the Shark, the look in his eye predatory in a way that has your breath hitching, your body burning in a way that is new and strange and delicious. Like that look.Â
            He taps his card against the card reader, accepting the taco bag with his free hand and guiding you back to the green of the park, to the blanket you spread out on the grass. He sinks down beside you, pulling you against him, your back to his chest, arm anchoring you against him, heavy and protective in a way that is heady.Â
            And it stays like that for the entire movie, even when he whispers that you were right about the tacos or when you start to cry at the ending of The Notebook. He stays holding you just like that for the entire time, his touch safe and gentle in a way that no oneâs touch has ever been before.Â
            And something changes when you get in his car and he drives back to your house, Ethel Cain playing on low volume over his Mercedes sound system. Something changes because every moment is charged.Â
            âCome inside?â you ask him when heâs stopped before your house, âNettlesâ softly playing in the background.Â
            âCandy,â he whispers, his hand reaching out to cup your face, touch gentle and igniting in its own way. Your skin feverish beneath his touch. âIf I go insideâŚI donât know if Iâll be able to control myself.â
            âMaybe I donât want you too,â you whisper and he nods, pupils expanding across ocean blue eyes as he follows into your house, helping you out of your coat, his hand torturously slow as he eases the zipper down. You kick off your shoes as he hangs the coats up and you turn to him, reaching for his shirt and pulling him too, wanting to feel.Â
            You press your lips against his, feeling a spark move through you, his hands resting on your hips, fitting to you as if they were meant to be there all along, his lips moving against yours in a way that feels too good, in a way that should be illegal.Â
            You move as one, backing up to your bedroom, clothes worked free from bodies, his tongue sliding along yours before you break away, breathless, chest heaving, stomach coiling and body wanting. You want his touch.Â
            âYou ready?â he asks you, his eyes entirely black and you nod, his hands freeing you of the rest of your clothes, freeing him of his. He pushes you back onto the bed, his touch gentle as he spreads your legs, kneeling before you, pressing kisses against your inner thighs, his eyes on yours as he inches closer to your cunt.Â
            You shudder at the feeling, at the rightness of it, when he drags his tongue from your entrance to your clit, swirling twice, whispering, âjust as sweet as I imagined.â The rest of the night is a haze of sex, sex and more sex, his touch perfect in a way youâve never had before.Â
            And when itâs over, when youâre falling asleep you hear him whisper, âI think I might love you, Candy.â
            And you think you might love him too.
            Brendon watches as you push through the glass doors, every inch of your body drawn tight like a high wire, anger writ all over you. He heard the codes called, watched as you tried to save that infant, pumped air into their lungs, watched as it wasnât enough.Â
            Itâs why he crosses to you now, guiding you from the hallway, into your office, shutting the door behind him. He knows you need to explode, but he also knows that no one else can see it. You need to explode where no one will judge.Â
            âCome on, Candy,â he whispers, your attention not on him, but on some distant point, a storm raging in those perfect eyes. âYou need to hit something, so hit me.â
            You listen, your hands moving, slamming into his chest over and over and over, but it doesnât hurt, not the way the sounds of your sobs do as you hit him. And he just lets you hit him until you stop, until the anger gives way and sadness reigns completely, your voice broken as you whisper, âit hurts, Bren.â
            âThen why do you do it, sweet girl?â he asks, his hands taking yours as you collapse onto the couch, looking up at him with haunted eyes.Â
            âI do it for the ones that survive,â you whisper, your expression still sad but shifting to a happier look. âYou know,â you pause, swallowing hard, âfor every patient I lose, there is one that survives.â
            âIs it worth the pain?â he asks you, his own voice breaking. He doesnât understand, but he wants too desperately.
            âSo much,â you tell him, smiling a watery kind of smile. âI know that every patient that survives will go on to do great things. I know theyâll save the world even when weâve given them a fucked up one.â
            âBecause of you,â Brendon whispers, surprised when your face shifts, twisting into anger, into annoyance, the sadness wearing away for a bit.Â
            âNo, I donât a surgeonâs god complex,â you tell him and if he didnât know you, he would be insulted, but he does know you and he knows you just speak. âTheyâll do great things because thatâs them. I just will be the one who never gave up on them because of one bad day.â
            âBabe?â you hear Bren call out and you turn from the sink, your hands wet, peaches slipping between your hands, the water from the tap rushing out and over your hands.Â
            âWhatâs up?â you ask, watching as he steps in, shirtless, pajama pants hung low on the V of his hips.Â
            âWhat are these?â he asks you, holding up an orange prescription bottle, the one you take every day, the Adderall for twice a day.Â
            âMy meds,â you tell him, your tone slow and not understanding. You feel like thereâs some bigger picture here that youâre not seeing, something youâre missing as you turn the sink off, setting the peach into the drainer, turning and wiping your hands on a dish cloth.Â
            âWhy do you have Adderall?â he says, his expression knitting together into one that you canât quite read as your eyebrows rise and you cross your arms, your body prickling, muscles tensing with defensiveness.Â
            âI have ADHD, why? Whatâs your problem?â
            âShould you really be a doctor?â he asks you, his expression looking concerned, but you donât give a fuck. You thought he was different! You thought he was better!
            But heâs just like all those fuckers who told you that youâd never be a doctor. That the dream youâve had since you were a kid was impossible for someone who couldnât fucking focus! But youâve shown them! Youâve become an attending! You run a department! You save more lives than most NICUs across the country!
            How the fuck can he question you?!
            âGET THE FUCK OUT!â you scream, your voice guttural and raw and aching. You back up when he moves to step towards you, his expression falling. But he did this to himself! He has no place in your life if thatâs how heâll be.
            âCandy,â he whispers, but all you do is reach beside you, grabbing the peach youâd just washed and throwing it at him with all your strength. He dodges it and it smashes against the wall, the pulp crushed on impact, juice and skin and guts splattered on the wall as it sinks down to the floor, slow, slow, slow.Â
            âDid I stutter, Park?â you ask him, tone cold and cruel and nothing like the one youâve used around him before. He blanches, setting the pill bottle on the kitchen table and walking from the room, the front door slamming.Â
            When it slams, you give yourself permission to fall apart, sinking down to your knees, back sliding against the kitchen cabinets, your head falling against your knees as you cry, giant hiccupping sobs, your body shaking.Â
            You thought he was different but you were wrong again. You thought he was the one but you were wrong again.Â
            When will you ever be right?
            Park stands outside your house, his hand hovering, wanting to knock, to have you open the door so he can take back what he said, but he canât. You wonât.Â
            Itâs that thoughtâthat you wouldnât open the door for himâthat has him moving, turning and leaving.Â
            But heâs not giving up on you, on the two of you.Â
            He just has to figure out how to remove his foot from his mouth.
            You see the coffee on your desk, a sorry, Brendon on the plastic. You wonder if heâs watching, but you donât really care either way, simply knocking it off your desk, into the trash can, the lid coming off, the coffee gushing and filling every crevice in the black bag.Â
            Some things just can never go back in once theyâre out.
            âHey, Ava?â you call out, holding out the lip gloss, the Rhode one that was sitting on your desk, another gift from Brendon. âYou want this?â
            Another coffee.Â
            Into the trash it goes.
            âWhere do you keep getting these gifts?â Ava asks as she takes the bracelet from your hand, a silver chain lined with small sapphires. âI mean, I love that you keep giving them to me, but donât you think you should keep them?â
            âTheyâre from Brendon,â you tell her and she hisses, her lip curling at his name. âIâd trash most of them, but some of them,â you nod at the bracelet sheâs clasping on her wrist, âare too expensive.â
            âWhile,â she says, pulling you into a hug. âAt least one of us gets usage out of âem.â The two of you laugh even as your heart twists painfully at the idea of him.
            A clock. What the fuck do you want with a Bulova clock?
            âHey Marge?â
            The note has his handwriting on it. You donât even bother reading it, simply sweeping it into the trash can and dumping out the rest of your coffee on it, the letter disintegrating underneath the liquid.Â
            You only feel bad for the janitors.
            âWhat the fuck are you doing at my house?!â you cry, stepping out of your car, your keys on one finger, the metal clicking against the bright pink key chain which reads kicking ass and taking names in glittery gold writing. A gift from Ava.Â
            âI want to talk.â Brendon looks horrible, bags under his eyes and dry, chapped lips, but you canât find it in you to be sorry because heâs the one who did this. Heâs the one who said something you canât take back.Â
            âPretty sure you said all you needed to,â you tell him, your tone sardonic, voice just slightly husky from the tears building in your throat as you push past him, sliding your house key into your deadbolt.Â
            âI didnât mean it,â he says, his hand pressing against your arm. You shrug away from his grip, the movement aggressive as you turn to him, your face burning with anger and your eyes narrowed in a glare.Â
            âDonât fucking touch me, you asshole!â you hiss and he takes a step back, but he doesnât leave.Â
            âI want to apologize and youâve been getting rid of all my gifts!â he cries, his own anger getting the better of him and you step forwards, hauling your hand back and slapping him, the sound ringing through the still air of your neighbourhood. You can see, even in the dim lights, the red welt from your hand on his cheek.Â
            âFUCK OFF!â you scream. âTake a fucking hint! I DONâT WANT TO SEE YOU! I DONâT WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! I. DONâT. WANT. YOU. IN MY LIFE!â
            âYou canât just decide that!â he yells, his own voice arcing through the air as he reaches forwards, his hand wrapping around yours. âI made a mistakeââ
            âNo!â you yell, your voice guttural. âYou were a fucking ableist prick! Thatâs not a mistake, thatâs just you!â
            âI LOVE YOU!â he cries and you wrench your hand from his, turning from him and unlocking your door, stepping in and closing the door, leaving only a little bit open as you look out at him.
            âFucking prove it.â And then you close the door, falling apart all over again, great heaving sobs as you run through your house to your bedroom, collapsing into sheets that still smell like his skin, still carry the imprint of his body.Â
            He hurt you in a way that no one ever has before. Heâs hurt you in a way that is not so easily forgiven even as your heart wants him here to hold you against the pain he caused.
            Heâs your paradox.Â
            You can see Brendon standing against the door to the NICU, two coffees held in his hand, just like those early days, months ago.Â
            âHi,â he says, stepping up towards you, âmy nameâs Brendon.â He holds your coffee out to you, worry and hope warring in his eyes.Â
            âCute trick,â you whisper, shoving past him, your shoulder digging into his chest. âKeep trying.â
            And he does. Every day, waiting for six months. Six months in which he never complained about your cold shoulder, about your ignoring him. Six months of him never pushing for more.Â
            Thatâs why you decide that a second chance might be in order.
            âHowâd you know my coffee order?â you say to him today from across the hall, running up to him and taking the proffered cup from his hands.Â
            âWould you believe a lucky guess?â And itâs that easy to fall back into it, to fall back into friendship, then something more.Â
            Itâs not always easy and itâs not always perfect, but second chances do exist. Can happen. Sometimes, damaged people can worm their way back into a damaged heart.Â
            Park looks at the tightly bundled baby in your arms, thinking heâs never seen anything so tiny in his life, never seen anything so fragile and yet strong, so paradoxical before. Heâs never seen anything as precious as you, the love of his life, holding his child before though, for sure.Â
            âSmaller than you think, huh?â you whisper and he nods, tearing his eyes away from the baby girl in your arms, the one with your hair and eyes and frown.Â
            âThank you,â he whispers, the words thick in his throat as he reaches for your hand, holding it as he sinks down beside you on the bed, his other hand smoothing non-existent hair back from yourâhisâdaughterâs head.Â
            âFor what?â you ask, your words elongated with the yawn.Â
            âFor giving me a second chance.â
            Hearts are, definitely, the most fragile organ in the human body. They break and bleed and stop and start and do a million things that destroy you completely.Â
            But theyâre also the most essential. They give you life and love and second chances. They can be fixed when they break with time and a skilled hand and sometimes, a persistent, fucking asshole.
            Bones and hearts break but thatâs just being human. Thatâs just the paradox of living.Â
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Sukuna had always been into tattoos. He got his first ones on his wrists, two thick lines on each hand, while he was only in his junior year. Now he's got more than double the amount on his biceps, shoulders, back, etc. All of them were thick and black; he refused to get anything with colour or even a different type of design.
âDo you ever get bored with your tattoos?â you questioned him once, your fingers tracing the lines as you both sat on the couch. He only gave a blunt no before turning back to his phone. This did not stop you from commenting on them â this led to the colouring idea.
You had seen different videos of girls drawing or colouring in their boyfriends' tattoos, and while Sukuna was not your boyfriend, he had a great amount of utterly depressing tattoos that could use your creative taste.
Sukuna sat at the small island in your apartment â markers and pens scattered across the glossy surface. A cap in between your teeth and a purple marker between your fingers. You mumbled âWould you stop movingâŚâ drawing the outline of roses between the tattoos on his bicep.
You could feel him glaring at you, a permanent scowl on his face. âI am not a schoolgirl.â Sukuna gritted out, âI donât want roses on my fucking arm.â You simply continued your line work â poking his side when he tried to move away,
It wasn't long before you got his right arm cluttered with purple and blue. Butterflies on his forearm and flowers going up his bicep. âIsn't it perfect!?â Your fingers were tight around his wrist, pulling his arm up to show the swirl of lines, thick and thin. You waited eagerly for a positive reaction but he just stared at you.
He stood from his seat, easily towering over you. You lifted a brow, taking a small step back in confusion. While turning, he pulled off his band shirt â revealing the tattoos and muscles. You simply stood there in confusion as to why this man was stripping for no reason. âDo I have to spell it out for you, woman?â he grunted, turning to grab a handful of markers, shoving them towards you. âYou know what, draw or donât, I don't care.â
He was telling you to continue. He spent the last hour throwing out complaints and small insults only to literally shove the materials in your hands. How could you refuse?
a/n - I am unfortunately sick so that is why there was no posts last weekend but I think I finally have enough energy to start writing again!!
Hope you enjoyed!!
@k4rinaviiz please do not repost, translate or copy my work. all my work is originally mine.
Summary: Youâre an aspiring actress waiting to be discoveredâthe embodiment of sunshine itself: radiant, stubborn, and perhaps a little too kind for your own good. Then you step into Harryâs world, one painted in shades of grey, and nothing for either of you is ever the same
A/n: Hello my lovessss! I donât even know where all this inspo came from, but Iâm so happy with how it turned out! Iâm always looking to grow and write better, so Iâd love any feedback you have. Thanks for reading, love you all!
Word count: 20k
Warnings: Slow burn, angst, a bit of a mean Harry not too much, smut, virgin reader, oral sex m to f, unprotected but then protected sex lol.
You stared at the number in front of youâ301âetched in gold serif font, elegant and a little old-fashioned. Pretty numbers, you thought. Your gaze dropped, scanning the ground for a welcome mat, but your brows knit together when you found nothing. No cheerful âhello,â no quirky quote. Just bare floor.
Balancing two large suitcases and a tote bag slung over your shoulder, you adjusted the strap of your pink, flower-patterned sundress, took a deep breath, and knocked on the door with the biggest smile you could muster.
It was supposed to be one of those clichĂŠsâyou knock, and someone warm and welcoming swings the door open, shows you around, tells you about the neighbors. A sitcom moment. But insteadâ
âOh. Youâre here.â
The voice was flat, the expression even flatter. He didnât step aside or offer a hand with your bags, didnât even invite you in. He just turned around, leaving the door wide open, and walked away.
You blinked, confusion tugging at your smile, but dragged your suitcases inside anyway. Grey walls greeted you, minimalistic dĂŠcor in every shade of beige, black, and dull gray. Cold. Quiet. Not exactly welcoming.
And thenâhim again. Standing in the middle of the living room, holding out a piece of paper. At the top, in bold capital letters:
HOUSE RULES
No loud music.
No guests without permission.
Donât touch my stuff.
Quiet hours: 10 p.m. â 7 a.m.
Do NOT go into my bedroom.
Respect my food in the fridge.
Always carry your keys.
You skimmed through them, lips twitching. Some rules seemed normal enough, but others practically screamed: Hi, Iâm grumpy as hell.
âRules,â he said matter-of-factly. âTheyâre easy to follow. Your roomâs down the hallway. Mineâs across from it. If my door is closed, donât knock unless the apartmentâs on fire.â
You blinked, swallowing hard like a stray kitten caught in the rain. âYes, understood.â
âGreat.â He didnât even look at you as he disappeared into his room, door clicking shut.
He didnât even ask my name, you thought with a sigh.
Dragging your bags down the hall, you found the room heâd pointed out. Grey walls again, a slightly crooked bed, but a large window and a big closet. Simple, but enough. It surprised you how quiet everything wasâthe neighborhood, the apartment, him.
You werenât used to quiet. Back home, silence didnât exist. A big country house full of noise: two brothers, three sisters, mom, dad, grandma, an aunt and her twins. Someone was always crying, laughing, or arguing over a lost jacket. Pots clattered in the kitchen, dadâs lawnmower roared at dawn, and voices spilled through every corner.
Nowâjust silence.
You exhaled slowly, glancing at your suitcases. âItâs fine,â you whispered, more to yourself than anyone else.
You unpacked piece by piece, filling the room with tiny comforts: lavender bedding that smelled faintly of home, your worn bunny plushie, two pink mugs with cat ears, and a colorful French press. The quiet pressed in around you, but little by little, the room began to feel like yours. You wandered into the kitchen, opening cabinets until you found one with a strip of masking tape labeled with your name. SoâŚhe had remembered it from your application. That counted for something, right?
You carefully placed both of your pink cat-ear mugs inside and set your colorful French press on the counter beside his sleek, black Nespresso machine. The contrast made you smileâsunshine versus storm cloud, side by side.
When you turned around to head back to your room, you startled, letting out a tiny squeak as you jumped. He was standing right there, silent as a shadow.
âWhatâs that?â he asked, brows furrowing.
âThis?â You pointed at the French press, forcing a smile. âItâs my Bodum French press. You like coffee?â
âYeah,â he said simply.
You waited, hoping he might add something moreâa follow-up question, a joke, anything. But instead, he moved past you, sat down on the sofa, opened his laptop, and that was the end of the conversation.
You exhaled softly. Moving away from home, youâd expected challenges. You braced yourself for missing family, for the hunt to find a job. But this? Living with him? That already felt like a new, impossible level of hard.
Later that day, you finally finished unpacking the last of your things in your new room. The space looked warmer now, a little more you. Still, your stomach reminded you that your side of the fridge was empty, and maybeâjust maybeâyou could even bake something later.
You tucked your wallet into a tote bag, slipped on your shoes, and slid the final cardboard box into the back of the closet. With a deep breath and a smile, you headed for the front door. A new start. You werenât going to let a strangerâor his rulesâdim your light andâŚ
âForgetting something?â
The voice made you pause, one foot already out the door. You turned back to see him leaning lazily against the wall, keys dangling from his finger. He wasnât even looking at you, just spinning the key ring like it was second nature.
âOhâŚrightâŚâ You crossed the room, plucking the keys from his hand with a sheepish smile.
âRule number seven,â he said flatly. âAlways carry your keys.â
đ
When you came back from the grocery store, tote bags digging into your hands, the faint sound of sizzling reached you before you even stepped into the kitchen. Peeking in, you spotted him at the stove, working a pan with calm precisionâstir-fry, by the smell of it.
âHi,â you said softly, almost careful, already knowing not to expect much of a reply.
He didnât look up, didnât say the word back, but you caught the tiniest twitch in his jaw. Taking the silence as permission, you slipped past him and began stocking your side of the fridge, then the pantry.
Even with that stern, unreadable face, you noticed itâhis eyes flicking, quick and subtle, toward what you were unpacking. Maybe he was silently judging your colorful cereal boxes, or maybe he was just curious. Either way, the thought made you bite back a smile.
You placed the last box of cereal into the pantry, then hesitated, glancing at the sizzling pan in front of him.
âSmells good,â you said softly. âDo you, um, want me to help with anything? Iâm a pretty decent vegetable chopper.â
He didnât even look up, just shook his head once. âIâve got it.â
That was the end of the conversation. You lingered for a moment, then nodded, more to yourself than him. âAlright⌠Iâll just wait until youâre done to make mine.â
He gave no reply, so you slipped away to your room, scrolling idly through your phone to pass the time. The house was quiet except for the faint clatter of pans and the hiss of steam drifting through the walls.
Peeking out, you padded softly into the hallway. The kitchen lights were still on, the air fragrant with soy and garlic. He was there, already at the small dining table with his laptop open beside him, eating from a bowl like nothing in the world could disturb him.
On the counter, set neatly near the edge, was a second plate.
Your eyes flicked from the food to him, but he didnât look at youâdidnât acknowledge you at all. He just kept eating, focused and unbothered. But something about the way that second plate sat waiting in plain view left no room for doubt.
With a small, grateful smile, you pulled the plate toward you, whispering under your breath, âMaybe not all grump.â Before you could even finish, he pushed back his chair, scooped up his laptop, and disappeared down the hall. A second later, the sound of his bedroom door closing clicked through the silence.
You stood there for a moment, half amused, half frustrated. No words, no nothing, just action.
Still, you felt like you needed to say something back. When you finished and cleaned your plate you went straight to your room, grabbed a sticky note from your desk, you scribbled quickly:
âThanks for dinner âĄâ
With a grin, you tiptoed to his door and slid the note under the crack. It felt silly, like sneaking around in a game, but it was the best you could do.
đ
The next morning, you woke to sunlight spilling through the big window and the faint hum of the city outside. The apartment, though, was silent. Too silent.
You stretched, rubbed the sleep from your eyes, and padded into the hallway barefoot. His bedroom door was wide open now, bed neatly made, no trace of him anywhere.
With the apartment empty, curiosity itched at you. You wandered slowly through the living room, eyes scanning the plain gray walls and beige furniture. Nothing personal. Not a single photo frame on the shelves. The counter was bare, save for the black Nespresso machine and the French press youâd left beside it. You even peeked toward the side table by the couch, but there were only chargers and a coaster.
No pictures. No postcards. No magnets from trips. Not even a forgotten grocery receipt.
You stood in the middle of the room, tote bag from yesterday still by the door, feeling both amused and unsettled. âWho lives like this?â you murmured.You circled back towards your room, ready to give up, when something caught your eye. A slip of paper sticking out from under his laptop charger on the coffee table.
Curiosity won over hesitation. You tugged it freeâa folded bill, crumpled at the edges, like it had been stuffed in a pocket and forgotten.
It wasnât just a bill, though. Your eyes flicked to the bold letters at the top: The Rusty Note â Live Music Fridays.
Beneath it, smaller print listed the lineup. And there it was: Midnight Avenue. The band name had a scribbled circle around it in black pen, and at the bottom of the receipt was a drink orderâtwo beers, one soda.
Your brows lifted. So heâs in a band.
Suddenly, the quiet, guarded guy in the next room didnât feel so one-dimensional. You pictured him under stage lights, guitar in hand, the opposite of the silent shadow youâd met at the door.
You set the bill back exactly where it had been, heart racing a little. A secret. A clue.Â
âMidnight Avenue,â you whispered, trying the words on your tongue like they were part of a puzzle youâd just begun to solve.Â
And also, just like that you broke rule #3
Back in your room, you sat cross-legged on the bed with your laptop balanced on your knees. The name still echoed in your mindâMidnight Avenue.
With a guilty grin, you opened a new tab and typed it in. The search results popped up quickly: a modest Instagram page, a couple of tagged posts, a handful of grainy bar photos.
You clicked on one video. The sound was tinny, recorded from someoneâs phone, but it was enough. There he was, on stage under dim neon lights, guitar slung across his chest. His face was the same unreadable mask, but the way he played wasnât. Confident. Alive. Like the music pulled out a side of him you couldnât imagine in the quiet gray apartment.
You scrolled further, finding flyers for past gigs, a few comments about the bandâs âmoody soundâ and âlate-night energy.â In one picture, he even looked like he was smilingânot big, not obvious, but enough to make you blink.
You leaned back against your lavender pillows, heart thudding faster than it should. So he wasnât just the silent, rule-obsessed roommate. He was someone people went out of their way to see. Someone who belonged to a world you hadnât known about until now.
The thought of asking him about it crossed your mindâthen you pictured his face, that flat tone of voice, the shut door. No. BAD IDEA.
đ
The first few days in the city slipped by in a blur. You woke early, sometimes to find the apartment already empty, other times catching the faint sound of the shower running through the walls before his door closed again. He came and went like clockwork, never volunteering where he was headed, never asking where you were going.
You tried. Cheerful good mornings, small comments about the weather, even casual questions about the best grocery store nearby. Heâd answer, but never more than the bare minimum. Words from him felt rationed. So you filled the silence with your own noise.
There were auditions. One ended before youâd even spoken a line, the casting director waving you off with a polite, âWeâll be in touch.â Another felt promising until the girl before you walked out clutching the script with the confidence of someone already chosen. You told yourself it was fine. There would be more.
In the evenings, you propped your phone against a mug and FaceTimed your family. Your sisters talked over each other, your dad asked if you were eating enough, your mom wanted a tour of the apartment. You tilted the screen carefully, avoiding the gray walls and keeping your lavender bedding in view instead.
When your friends called, you laughed and exaggerated the quirks of city lifeâthe subway, the pigeons, the endless honking. But you didnât mention him. Not really. How could you describe someone so silent, so carefully walled off?
Still, curiosity lingered. You caught yourself listening for the sound of his guitar through the walls, sometimes you peeked into the kitchen just to see what he cooked, hoping for a clue about who he really was. But if he noticed your curiosity, he never showed it.
It was 10:30 p.m. when you stumbled back into the apartment, makeup smudged and your tote bag heavier than usual though you carried nothing new. You had spent all day chasing a role that had slipped right through your fingers the moment you walked into the audition room. The casting directorâs blank stare, the clipped thank you, the way no one looked up when you leftâit all replayed in your head like a cruel loop.
By the time you reached your bedroom, you could feel the tight ache in your chest breaking into sobs. You didnât even bother turning on the main light, just dropped onto the bed and fumbled for your phone. One ring, two rings, and then your best friendâs familiar voice filled the silence.
You let it outâhow you felt humiliated, how maybe you werenât cut out for this city, how every step seemed to prove you didnât belong. Your words cracked, spilling into tears, your friendâs voice on the other side a lifeline of soft encouragement. âYouâre not a failure,â they repeated. âYouâre brave for even being there.â
Your knees were curled into your chest, the phone wedged against your ear as you tried to steady your breathing.
âIâm just⌠I donât know what Iâm even doing here,â you sobbed into the speaker, your best friendâs voice a soft murmur on the other end. âI thought I could handle rejection, but they didnât even look at me, like I wasnât worth the two seconds it would take to listen. And maybe theyâre rightâmaybe Iâm not worth it.â
Your words tumbled out, jagged and breathless, not realizing how loud youâd gotten in the quiet apartment.
The knock on your door startled you so badly you almost dropped your phone.
âHold on,â you whispered to your friend, wiping at your face with the heel of your palm.
The door creaked open just enough for Harry to appear, his hand still on the knob. His hair was mussed, his expression sharp and impatient.
âItâs past ten,â he said flatly, voice low and firm. âWalls are thin, soââ
He stopped.
The second his eyes met yours, glassy and rimmed red, his words faltered. He didnât move for a beat, like heâd been caught in something he hadnât meant to step into.
You pressed your lips together, mortified. Your friendâs voice was still faintly audible through the speaker, asking if you were okay.
Harryâs jaw flexed. âSorry,â then, without another word, he stepped back and shut the door gently.
You stared at the closed door, your breath still shaky.
Swallowing, you lifted the phone back to your ear. âSorry, IâuhâIâll call you back,â you whispered, hanging up before your friend could protest.
For a long while, you just sat there in silence, the air heavy with what had just happened. After that you just went to brush your teeth and slumped in the bed praying to fall asleep quickly to forget about the audition and about your very grumpy very unknown roommate seeing you cry and making him uncomfortable.
You had broken almost three rules by nowâit was silly how you were more worried about the rule breaking and making him uncomfortable than your actual feelings. The thought made you want to laugh and cry at the same time. Instead, you pulled the blanket over your head and tried to will your brain into silence.
But of course, it didnât work. Every time you closed your eyes, you saw the way heâd stopped mid-sentence, the flicker of something softer in his expression before he shut the door.
Somehow, Harry being witness to your tears felt worse than the casting director telling you âthank you, next.â And the worst part? You couldnât figure out why.
The next morning, sunlight bled through the curtains, nudging you awake far earlier than you wanted. Your head throbbed faintly, your throat raw from crying. With a groan, you rolled over, half-expecting to hear faint kitchen noises or footsteps.
But the apartment was silent.
Dragging yourself out of bed, you padded into the hallway, hair messy, socks slipping on the wood floor. When you stepped into the kitchen, you stopped short.
On the counter sat a plateâscrambled eggs, two pieces of toast, and a small bowl of cut fruit, still fresh enough to glisten. A mug of black coffee steamed beside it, the smell curling warmly through the air.
Your chest tightened.
There was no note, no sticky reminder, nothing dramaticâjust breakfast, plated neatly, waiting for you.
You glanced around as if he might appear from behind the fridge or step out from the hallway, but the apartment was empty. His keys were gone from the hook near the door.
Still, you sat down at the small table, staring at the food for a long moment before taking the first bite. It was simple, but somehow it tasted better than anything youâd eaten since moving in.
And you couldnât help the small, ridiculous smile tugging at your lips.
You spent most of the day in your room, alternating between scrolling job boards and rereading the audition notes that made you feel worse the longer you looked at them. But the thought of the breakfast kept sneaking back in, softening the edges of your mood.
By late afternoon, you heard the sound of the lock turning.
Harry stepped in, hair a little messy from the wind, guitar case slung over his shoulder. He kicked his boots off near the door and set his case down without noticing you at first.
Your heart thudded. You wantedâneededâto say something.
âHey,â you started, voice tentative. âAbout⌠last night.â
That caught his attention. He looked over, unreadable as ever, one hand still resting on the strap of his bag.
You twisted your fingers together. âIâIâm sorry if I was too loud. I didnât mean to break your rules. I just⌠had a rough day.â
For a moment, you thought he was going to brush you off with a shrug and retreat to his room. Instead, he leaned against the wall, arms crossing over his chest.
âYou donât have to apologize for crying,â he said simply, his tone even.Â
Relief washed over you, but also a little courage. âRight. Okay. Um⌠thank you. For breakfast.â
His jaw worked for a second, like he wanted to deflect, but then his gaze flicked to yours. âFigured you probably didnât eat last night. Donât make it a big deal.â
You smiled despite yourself. âI wonât. Promise.â
For the first time, something like the shadow of a grin tugged at his mouthâsmall, fleeting, but realâbefore he pushed off the wall and grabbed his guitar case.
âGood,â he said, and disappeared into his room.
Still, the moment lingered. And for the first time since moving in, you felt like maybeâjust maybeâhe wasnât entirely untouchable.
That evening, you were in the kitchen again, determined to bake something. The cupboards were still half-bare, but you had managed to grab flour, sugar, and a carton of eggs earlier. Cupcakes werenât home, exactly, but they felt close enough.
You were whisking the batter when you felt that prickle at the back of your neckâthe same one you always felt when he suddenly appeared without a sound.
âDo you always hum when you cook?â Harry asked.
You jumped, nearly spilling the bowl. âGodâyouâre like a ghost,â you muttered, clutching your chest before setting the whisk down.
His lips curvedâjust slightly. âDidnât mean to sneak up.â He moved to the fridge, pulling out a bottle of water.
You eyed him as he twisted the cap. âI didnât know you noticed things like that.â
âI notice a lot of things,â he replied evenly, though his eyes lingered on the bowl, the bright silicone spatula, the messy bit of flour on your shirt. âCupcakes?â
You nodded, suddenly self-conscious. âYeah. Thought it might make the place feel less⌠gray.â
Something flickered across his face, quick as lightning. âNot a bad idea,â he said, softer than you expected.
You blinked. âDo you⌠want one? When theyâre done, I mean.â
He didnât answer right away. Just took a sip of his water, watching you over the bottleâs rim. Then, after a beat:
âMaybe.â
And with that, he retreated back to the sofa, laptop in handâbut the word stuck with you. Maybe. It wasnât much, but from him, it felt like a door cracking open just enough to let a sliver of light through.
The smell of vanilla and sugar soon filled the apartment, warm and inviting in a way the gray walls never managed to be. You pulled the tray from the oven, setting it on the counter, and carefully spread pale pink frosting across the tops.
You hesitated before carrying one over to the living room, your heart thumping faster than it should for a simple cupcake.
Harry was exactly where youâd left him, laptop balanced on his knees, fingers tapping lightly at the keys. His hair fell into his face until he pushed it back absently.
âHey,â you said softly, holding out the plate. âTheyâre ready. You said maybe.â
His eyes flicked up, then down to the cupcake, then back to you. He didnât move for a second, as though testing whether this was some kind of trick. Finally, he closed the laptop with a quiet click and set it aside.
You placed the plate in front of him, feeling a ridiculous rush of nerves as he picked it up. He turned it in his hand once, studying the frosting swirl, before taking a bite.
For the briefest moment, his expression shiftedâjust a flickerâbut you caught it. His jaw relaxed, the corner of his mouth twitched, almost a smile.
âItâs good,â he said, voice low.
Relief bubbled out of you in a laugh. âThanks. I was afraid you were going to say you donât eat sugar after nine p.m. or something.â
That earned you a lookâsharp at first, then unexpectedly amused. He shook his head, taking another bite. âNot one of the rules.â
His eyes met yours then, and for the first time, he didnât look away right after. The silence stretched, softer this time, before he returned to his cupcake like it was a shield.
Still, that sliver of light through the door grew just a little wider.
You lingered nearby as he finished the last bite, trying not to stare too openly but unable to help it.Â
âSoâŚâ you started, voice casual. Too casual. âDo you play often? The guitar?â
Harryâs eyes lifted to yours, unreadable. âYeah.â
âAre you, umâlike, in a band or something?â you pressed, tilting your head innocently.
For a second, you swore you saw his mouth twitch, not in amusement but in recognition. His gaze narrowed, sharp but quiet, like he could see straight through you.
âFunny question,â he said slowly, leaning back against the cushions. âMakes me wonder how youâd even think to ask it.â
Your stomach dipped. You tried for a shrug, feigning nonchalance. âJust⌠curious. Most people donât have a guitar case lying around unless they use it.â
He studied you for a long moment, as though weighing the truth in your words. Then he leaned forward, setting the empty plate on the coffee table.
âCuriosityâs fine,â he murmured, his voice even but edged, âas long as it doesnât cross into rule three or five.â
Your breath caught. You plastered on a smile, forcing your tone light. âNoted.â
But the way his eyes lingered, sharp and knowing, made your pulse thrum faster. For the first time, you wondered if he already suspected how much you wanted to know.
đ
The days blurred into a quiet rhythm. You tiptoed around his rules, careful not to push too hard, and heâwell, he started giving you more than one-word answers. Not a lot more, but enough to feel like cracks in his armor.
A muttered âMorningâ when you crossed paths in the kitchen. A dry âThat smells edibleâ when you burned your first attempt at pasta. Even the occasional question tossed your way, quick and casual, as if he regretted asking it immediately after.
Still, the apartment was missing something. It wasnât just the silenceâit was the sterility of it all, beige and gray swallowing every corner. So, one afternoon, you came home balancing a small terracotta pot in your hands, a tiny green plant with wide leaves that practically radiated cheer.
You set it on the coffee table in the living room and stepped back, smiling. âThere,â you said to no one, brushing the dirt from your hands. âInstant upgrade.â
You didnât hear him until his voice came from the hallway. âWhatâs that?â
You turned, caught in the act, but didnât back down. âA plant. His name is Finn.â
Harryâs brow furrowed as he walked closer, hands in his pockets. He looked at the plant for a long moment, and you braced yourself for the inevitable rules lecture.
Instead, he crouched slightly, tilting his head as if assessing it. âItâs not fake?â
You blinked. âNo. Real.â
His lips pressed together, and for the first time, you saw something like approval flicker across his face. âLooks⌠good.â
The words were quiet, almost reluctant, but they warmed you more than you wanted to admit.
You grinned. âSo Finn can stay?â
He straightened up, glancing at you briefly before turning toward his room. âAs long as you water him.â
It was a small thing, but to you, it felt monumental. Like heâd just admittedâwithout saying itâthat maybe he didnât mind sharing the space with you after all.
đ
Friday night, the city buzzed with life around you, but you didnât feel like part of it. You were just tiredâbone-deep tiredâfrom the week. When you reached the apartment building, though, your stomach sank.
Your tote was lighter than it should have been.
Keys.
You dug through the bag twice, then three times, even checked your pockets though you knew better. Nothing.
Your phone was in your hand, thumb hovering over his number. Rule seven screamed in your headâAlways carry your keys. You could practically hear his voice reminding you. Calling him felt like confessing a crime.
So instead, you sat down against the door. I can wait a while. At first, it was just to think, to stall for a minute. But the hallway was quiet, and the cool wall behind you made your eyelids heavy. Hours blurred, and before long, exhaustion pulled you under.
The sound of steps jolted you awake. Your head shot up.
âJesus ChristâY/Nâ Harryâs voice cut sharp before it faltered. He crouched down, frowning as he took in the sight of you curled against the doorframe, your dress wrinkled, your face marked from leaning on your arm.
âWhat happened?â His voice was low, urgent in a way you hadnât heard before.
âIâuhââ You rubbed your eyes, embarrassed heat rushing to your cheeks. âI forgot my keys. Didnât want to bother you. With the⌠rule.â
For a second, he just stared at you, something tightening in his jaw. Then he shook his head, running a hand through his hair.
âIn this scenario,â he said firmly, almost like he was scolding himself more than you, âitâs obviously okay to call me. You donât sit out here all night.â
The guilt in his eyes was clear, even if his voice stayed even. He stood, reaching down to help you up. âYou couldâve been freezing. Or worse.â
You took his hand, letting him pull you inside. âI didnât want to break the rules,â you murmured
He exhaled, something like frustration threading through it. âForget the rules right now, alright? I donâtâŚâ He trailed off, jaw tight, shutting the door behind you. âI donât want you waiting out there again.â
The words lingered between you, heavier than any rule taped to the fridge.
You hovered in the entryway, clutching your bag. He set his guitar case down with more force than necessary, then disappeared briefly into the kitchen. When he came back, he was holding a glass of water, which he pressed into your hands.
âDrink,â he said, softer this time.
You obeyed, the cool water easing the dryness in your throat. When you set the glass down, you caught him watching you, something unguarded flickering across his face before he looked away.
âYou were out late,â you said, trying for lightness. âGig?â
He gave a short nod, toeing off his boots. âYeah.â He paused, glancing at you again. âWent alright.â
It wasnât much, but it was the first piece of his life heâd willingly offered. And after the night youâd hadâsitting on the floor outside your own home, waiting, doubtingâyou clung to it.
âGood,â you whispered, the corner of your mouth tugging up.
For once, he didnât retreat straight to his room. He lingered a moment longer, then jerked his chin toward the hallway. âGet some sleep. You look wrecked.â
And though the words were blunt, there was no edge to them this timeâonly a strange, quiet concern that followed you all the way to your bedroom door.
The next morning, the smell of something warm and toasty pulled you out of sleep. Blinking at the clock, you realized it was barely eight. That alone was unusualâHarry was never up this early unless he had somewhere to be.
Padding into the kitchen, you found him again at the counter, sleeves pushed up, hair a little messy, sliding scrambled eggs onto two plates. A small stack of toast leaned precariously beside them, and the coffee machine gurgled as it finished its last cycle.
Your throat went tight, remembering last nightâthe door, the guilt in his eyes, how small you must have looked curled up outside.
âMorning,â you whispered.
He glanced over, jaw flexing like always, then nodded once. âSit.â
You did, suppressing the smile tugging at your lips as he placed a plate in front of you. He didnât linger, didnât hover. Just poured himself coffee and sat across from you, silent but present. It was more than enough.
And then you noticed itâtucked under your plate, almost like a placemat. A sheet of lined paper. The familiar scrawl made your stomach flip.
The Rules (modified):
Donât go into my room.
Donât touch my stuff.
No loud calls after ten. (exception: emergencies, yes crying is an emergency.)
If you forget your keys, call me.
Your eyes flicked up, and he was already watching you. Not glaring, not scoldingâjust watching, a little stiff, like he wasnât sure how youâd react.
You traced the paper with your fingertip, lips curving despite yourself. âSo⌠exceptions exist.â
He grunted, stabbing at his eggs with his fork. âYes.â
You bit back the flood of gratitude rising in your chest, choosing instead to take another bite of toast like it was the most casual thing in the world. But your heart was racing.
Because for the first time since moving in, the rules werenât just walls. They were⌠bending.
And that, you decided, was your biggest victory yet.
đ
You smoothed the hem of your new dress in front of the hallway mirror, it was a pale yellow dress that looked like it had been plucked straight from a fairytale. The fabric was light and airy, layers of sheer tulle falling gracefully into a full, mid-calf skirt that swayed with every step. Tiny dotted patterns scattered across the material caught the light, adding a subtle shimmer. The bodice was fitted like a corset with sweetheart cups that framed your neckline and delicate ribbon ties rested on your shoulders.
Exactly what you needed for todayâs audition.
Behind you, you heard footsteps. Harryâs, slow and even, padding down the hall toward the kitchen.
You turned, smile blooming nervously. âHeyâum. Do I look okay?â
He stopped dead a few feet away. For a beat, he didnât say anything, just let his eyes flick over you onceâquick, but not quick enough. His jaw flexed, like he had to physically lock something back down.
Then, before he could stop himself, the words slipped out. âYou look like the sunshine.â
The heat that rushed to your cheeks was instant, impossible to hide. âSunshine?â you repeated, the smile tugging at your lips betraying how flattered you were.
He blinked, as though realizing what heâd said. His mouth tightened, and he cleared his throat. âI meant⌠bright. Loud, even. Hard to miss.â
But his ears were pink, and you could tell he was scrambling for cover.
You tilted your head, biting your lip to stop your grin from growing. âIâll take sunshine,â you said softly, brushing past him toward the door.
And though he didnât answer, you caught the faintest curve at the corner of his mouth before he ducked his head.
Later the door swung open with a dramatic push, and you all but burst into the apartment. Your tote bag nearly slipped off your shoulder as you stumbled in, laughing breathlessly.
âI got it!â you squealed, tossing the bag on the couch. âI actually got the part!â
Your whole body seemed to glow, the yellow dress still fluttering around your knees as you spun once in the middle of the living room, too thrilled to care if you looked silly.
Harry had been stretched across the sofa with his laptop, but at the sound of your voice he froze, watching as you beamed at nothing and everything all at once.
Heâd seen you smile plenty of times, but not like this. This was blinding, unrestrained, pure joy radiating out of you until it filled the room. It made something sharp twist in his chest.
Because, if he was honest with himself, he couldnât remember the last time heâd felt anything like that.
Still, he found himself staring, jaw slack, as the corners of his own mouth tugged upward without permission. It was⌠contagious. Your happiness. And for the first time in a long while, he didnât just want to observe it from the safety of his own silence.
He wantedâjust for onceâto share it with you.
âYou got the part?â he asked
You stopped twirling, eyes wide with delight, and nodded so hard your hair bounced. âI got it, Harry! They actually picked me!â
He set the laptop aside, shifting forward on the couch. A strange, cautious warmth pressed against his ribs, a feeling that made him nervous to name. But still, he let himself smile, small but real. âThen I guess⌠congratulations.â
Your laughter bubbled again, brighter than before, and he thought maybeâjust maybeâhe could get used to this sound filling the apartment.
You spent the next hour pacing around your room, phone pressed to your ear as you called everyone you loved. Your mom. Your dad. Each one of your siblings. Your best friend. The words I got it! echoed again and again, your voice bright, bubbling, unstoppable.
Through the thin apartment walls, Harry could hear it allâyour laughter, your excited footsteps, the rise and fall of your joy spilling into every call. And even though he tried to keep his focus his lips betrayed him, tugging upward into a quiet smile.
It stirred something he hadnât felt in a long time. Not jealousyâno, he didnât begrudge you your happiness. It was more like a tug, an ache he couldnât name. The way you trusted so openly, the way you shared so freely, like happiness was meant to be scattered around without fear it might run out.
He set the laptop down, running a hand over his jaw. Maybe⌠maybe he should do something.
His mind immediately began spinning. Should I buy a bottle of champagne? Noâtoo posh, too over the top. Dinner, maybe? Invite her somewhere nice? What? No, that would feel like a date, and he wasnâtâthis wasnâtâ
He groaned, scrubbing his hand through his hair. Maybe I should just cook? Something simple? But then he pictured himself fumbling around the kitchen and her bright eyes watching him, and his pulse spiked. No, no.
Beers? he thought desperately. That was safer. Neutral. But even that felt too forced.
Then it hit him. Of course. The gig.
She could come, watch the band, have a fun night, soak up the music, the atmosphere. It wasnât a date, not reallyâit was casual, public, easy. And maybe, just maybe, it would let him share a piece of himself without having to strip down all his walls.
The idea settled into him and he sat there, rehearsing the words in his head like he was preparing for battle: You should come tonight. Itâs just a small set. No big deal.
Casual. Harmless. Nothing more.
So why did his heart pound as if it meant everything?
You ended the last call with your best friend, still smiling so wide your cheeks ached. Your phone slipped onto the bed beside you as you leaned back against the pillows, staring at the ceiling, replaying every little detail of the day in your head.
A soft knock on your door startled you. Not much of a knock, reallyâmore like the back of a knuckle brushing against wood.
âYeah?â you called, sitting up.
The door cracked open, and Harry leaned against the frame, arms crossed like he hadnât been pacing in the hallway for the past three minutes working up the nerve. His voice was calm, casualâat least, thatâs what he was aiming for.
âBig day, huh?â he said.
You grinned at him, still unable to contain yourself. âHuge. I canât believe it, Harry. I thought they hated me, and thenââ You stopped yourself before launching into another retelling. âSorry. Iâve been talking everyoneâs ears off.â
His lips twitched. âCould hear that.â
Heat rushed to your cheeks, but he didnât sound annoyedâjust⌠aware. Observing.
Then, after a pause, he shifted his weight and spoke quickly, like ripping off a bandage. âListen, uh. Iâve got a gig tonight. Just a small set, nothing major. Thought you might wanna come.â
Your brows shot up. Of all the things you thought he might say, that wasnât on the list. âA gig?â
âYeah.â He shrugged, gaze darting past you to the corner of the room, like he couldnât quite hold eye contact. âBar downtown. We start around ten. You donât have toâitâs justâŚâ He trailed off, clearing his throat. âFigured itâs a way to celebrate?â
The way he said itâso offhand, like it didnât matter either wayâdidnât quite cover the faint pink climbing his ears.
You bit your lip to keep from smiling too much. âYouâre inviting me.â
âIâm⌠mentioning an option,â he corrected, deadpan, though his jaw worked a little like he regretted opening his mouth at all.
Still, you could feel the smallest crack in his armor, and it warmed you all over. âWell,â you said lightly, âthen I guess Iâll take the option.â
His shoulders relaxed just the faintest bit. âCool. Iâll⌠we leave at 8.â
And with that, he nodded once, retreating back down the hall before you could see the tiny, nervous smirk tugging at his lips.
đ
The bar was dim, alive with the low hum of chatter and the clink of glasses. A string of colored lights zigzagged above the small stage, casting everything in a warm, intimate glow.
Harry walked in beside you, his hands shoved into the pockets of his black jacket, shoulders tight like he already regretted bringing you. You, on the other hand, practically bounced on your heels, your yellow dress a burst of light in the low-lit room.
As soon as you reached the stage area, a couple of guys looked up from tuning their instruments.
âHarry!â one of them called, grin spreading wide. He had curly hair pulled back into a bun and sticks tucked under one armâclearly the drummer.
Harry gave a nod. âThis isââ He hesitated for half a second before gesturing toward you. âMy⌠roommate.â
You stepped forward with your brightest smile, offering a hand. âHi! Itâs so nice to meet you.â
The bassist, tall and lanky with glasses slipping down his nose, chuckled as he shook your hand. âRoommate, huh? You donât look like the type Harry would put up with.â
âHey,â Harry muttered, shooting him a look.
But you just laughed, the sound light and unbothered. âGuess Iâm lucky then.â
After a round of quick introductions, Harry mumbled something about needing to check the set list and drifted toward the back of the stage, leaving you to find a spot. You chose a small table off to the side where you could see clearly, resting your chin in your hand, still smiling like the whole night was already magic.
Back on stage, as they plugged in cables and adjusted mics, the bandmates couldnât resist.
âSo,â the drummer said under his breath, nudging Harry with his stick. âWhoâs the sunshine?â
Harryâs brows drew together. âWhat?â
âThe girl,â the bassist chimed in, jerking his chin toward you. âSheâs, like⌠a flower come to life. All bright and smiley. Total opposite of you.â
Harryâs jaw tightened. âSheâs just my roommate.â
âUh-huh.â The drummer smirked. âFunny how your roommate shows up looking like she wandered out of a fairy tale.â
Harry busied himself with tuning his guitar, but his ears burned.
âSheâs sweet,â the bassist added, lowering his voice conspiratorially. âSmiled at me like Iâd just handed her a winning lottery ticket. Canât remember the last time someone looked that happy to be here.â He shot Harry a teasing grin. âNo wonder you brought her.â
Harryâs head snapped up. âI didnât bringââ He stopped himself, shaking his head. âShe wanted to come.â
âSure,â the drummer said, smirking. âJust a coincidence the grumpiest guy we know suddenly has sunshine tagging along.â
The bassist chuckled. âHonestly, I like it. Itâs like yin and yang. You, all broody and dark, her, all light and joy. Balance, man. It works.â
Harryâs blush deepened as he muttered, âYou two sound ridiculous,â but his fingers fumbled on the strings, betraying him.
Meanwhile, you sat at your little table, completely unaware, still smiling as you waved when you caught Harry glancing your way. He quickly looked back down, but not before the drummer elbowed him again with a knowing grin.
When the lights dimmed, a ripple of excitement spread through the bar. The casual chatter quieted, replaced by the anticipation of music about to begin. You leaned forward in your chair, elbows braced on the table, eyes fixed on the stage.
Harry stood near the mic, guitar slung low across his chest, head bent as he adjusted the strap. Even under the glow of red and amber stage lights, he seemed the same as alwaysâclosed off, unreadable.
But then he strummed the first chord.
The sound filled the bar instantlyâconfident, rough around the edges, alive. His bandmates joined in, the rhythm locking tight, and suddenly Harry wasnât your grumpy, rule-obsessed roommate anymore. He was something else entirely.
The lines of his face sharpened in the lights, his jaw tight with focus, his eyes half-closed as if he was lost somewhere only the music could take him. He leaned into the mic, voice spilling out low and raw, pulling every head in the bar toward him.
You sat frozen, goosebumps prickling up your arms.
He didnât just play the guitarâhe commanded it, every strum a piece of him let loose into the room. It was loud and unapologetic and yet so clearly his truth. For the first time, you understood why the rules, the silence, the wallsâmaybe he needed them just to contain this.
Your lips parted as you watched, unable to stop the slow smile spreading across your face.
And when his eyes flicked up for the briefest second, scanning the room, they landed on you. Just for a heartbeat.
Your smile widened, a little breath catching in your throat.
Harryâs fingers faltered for the tiniest moment, a split-second stutter in the strings, before he caught himself and pushed harder into the chorus, jaw flexing like nothing had happened.
But you saw it. And he knew you saw it.
By the time the song ended, the bar erupted in applause, whistles and cheers bouncing off the walls. You clapped so hard your palms stung, still beaming up at him like heâd just revealed a secret side of himself meant only for you.
And maybe, deep down, thatâs exactly what it felt like.
The walk back to the apartment is quiet at first, though not uncomfortably so. The night air is cool against your skin, humming with the distant buzz of traffic and the echo of laughter spilling from nearby bars. You walk beside Harry with your usual bounce, coat wrapped tightly around your shoulders, a smile that hasnât dimmed since the very first song he played.
Harry keeps his hands shoved deep in his jacket pockets, head ducked, curls clinging damply to his forehead. He looks tired in that flushed, post-gig way, but thereâs something warm in the corner of his mouth, like even if he doesnât admit it, heâs still buzzing too.
âYou were amazing,â you blurt suddenly, unable to keep it in any longer.
He glances at you sideways, caught off guard. âMm?â
âLikeâHarry, seriously. Amazing. I donât even know how you didnât tell me you play like that! You justââ you wave your hands, as though words arenât enough to capture what you feel. âYour voice! And the guitar, oh my God. And the way everyone just⌠followed you, like you were the center of everything. You donât even realize, do you?â
His steps falter, just barely. Compliments usually skim off him, deflected with a shrug or a joke, but you arenât teasing. Youâre looking at him like he hung the stars, and it makes him visibly uncomfortable. He shrugs, tugging at his sleeve.
âIt was fine.â
âFine?â you gasp, scandalized. âHarry, it was so much more than fine! You were brilliant. I wish you couldâve seen yourselfâactually, no, I wish you couldâve seen yourself through my eyes. The way your face changed when you sang? And when you did that solo? Everyone was staring at you.â
Harryâs chest tightens. Too much. Your happiness, your belief in himâitâs warm and suffocating all at once. By the time you both climb the stairs and step into the apartment, he looks like heâs carrying a weight only he can feel.
You kick your shoes off by the door, still glowing. âHarry, I swear, youâre gonna be huge one day. Not just local gigs, not just little bars. Bigger. People need to hear you. They have to.â
âStop,â he mutters, moving toward his room.
You blink, mid-sentence. âStop what?â
âJustâstop.â He doesnât look at you, his hand already on the door. His voice comes out harsher than he means, rough with nerves. âYou donât need to say all that.â
The silence after that cuts deeper than anything.
You stand there, frozen in the middle of the living room, arms still lifted in a gesture that now feels awkward. The smile slips right off your face. âOh,â you whisper, small and stung.
He disappears into his room, the door shutting firmly behind him. Not a slam, but solid enough that it feels like a line.
You stay rooted where you are, heat rising in your cheeks. Embarrassment washes over you in waves. Maybe youâd overdone it, maybe all that excitement spilling out of you was too much. Youâve been careful, trying not to overwhelm him, trying to respect the way he pulls back. And here you went, dumping everything on him in one breath.
You sit on the couch, hugging your knees. The silence presses heavy, but after a moment you remind yourselfâthis isnât cruelty. He wasnât trying to hurt you. This is Harry, retreating into himself, unsteady under the weight of kindness. Itâs not about you being wrong. Itâs about him not knowing how to hold it.
Through the wall, you think you can hear the faint creak of his mattress as he sits.
Inside his room, Harry is dragging his hands down his face, cursing himself. Every word youâd said replays in his headâbrilliant, amazing, bigger than this. And he canât believe any of it. Canât let himself. But the way youâd said it, like it was the truest thing in the world, burrowed under his skin. He shuts his eyes, listening.
Your voice carries faintly through the wall, muffled but clear. Youâve picked up your phone, calling someoneâmaybe your sister again, maybe a friend. He doesnât mean to eavesdrop, but your laugh filters through, bright and unguarded.
âIâm just⌠so proud of him,â youâre saying. âYou shouldâve seen him tonight. He was everything. Iâve never seen someone glow like that before. And he doesnât even realize. He doesnât see it at all. But I do.â
Harryâs chest aches. He presses a hand against it, as though that will keep the feeling at bay, but it doesnât.
Because even after he pushed you away, even after he shut the door, youâre still out there believing in himâlouder than he can ever believe in himself.
And for the first time in a long, long time, he finds himself smiling in the dark. Not a smirk, not a mask. A real smile. Small, fragile, but real.
Maybe, he thinks, it wouldnât be so terrible to share in some of that happiness you carry so easily.
đ
The morning light filters into the kitchen when you shuffle in, still in socks, hair messy from sleep. The apartment feels unusually still, like itâs holding its breath after what happened last night. You hesitate for a second before stepping farther in, half-expecting to find Harry already gone like most mornings.
But heâs there.
Sitting at the table, one hand wrapped around a mug, the other tapping lightly against the wood. His guitar leans against the wall nearby, and thereâs a plate of toast and eggs on the counterâyour plate, you realize.
His head lifts when he hears you. His eyes meet yours, green and sharp in the early light, but softer than usual. Almost uncertain.
âMorning,â you say carefully, testing the air.
âMorning,â he echoes, voice rough from sleep or nervesâyou canât tell which.
You walk over, fingers brushing the edge of the counter as you pick up the plate. For a moment, you wonder if you should just sit in silence, let it all fade. But then you notice the way heâs watching you, like heâs waiting for somethingâlike heâs the one holding his breath now.
So you smile. âThanks for breakfast.â
He clears his throat, gaze dropping to his mug. ââS nothing.â
You sit across from him, plate between you, and the silence stretches again. Only this time itâs not awkwardâitâs heavy, expectant. You can feel him wrestling with words.
Finally, he exhales and leans back, one hand rubbing the back of his neck. âAbout last nightâŚâ
You look up. His jaw flexes, like heâs bracing himself.
âI didnât mean toâshut you down like that,â he says slowly, carefully. âIâm⌠not used to it. People saying things like that about me. About the band. I donât⌠I donât know how to take it.â
Your chest softens instantly. The words arenât smooth, not polished, but theyâre honest. Maybe the first honest thing heâs given you since you moved in.
âI know,â you say gently, setting your fork down. âI figured it wasnât about me. I didnât take it that way.â
His eyes flick up at that, sharp and searching, like heâs checking if youâre telling the truth.
You nod, holding his gaze. âYou donât have to explain or make excuses, Harry. I meant what I said, but you donât have to believe me yet. You will, someday. For now, justâdonât worry about it.â
Something flickers across his face thenârelief, disbelief, something warmer underneath. His lips twitch, almost like a smile, though he presses them together quickly, hiding it.
âYouâre not mad?â
You laugh softly, shaking your head. âMad? No. Embarrassed maybe, for rambling so much, but never mad. Not at you.â
His shoulders drop a fraction, like a weight has eased off. He looks at you differently nowânot just the noisy, sunny roommate he canât keep up with, but someone patient enough to see through the walls heâs built.
For a moment, neither of you speak. The sunlight spills across the table, catching in his hair, warming the quiet between you. And then, almost too quietly to catch, he says:
âYouâre⌠easier to be around than I thought.â
Your heart skips, but you donât let your smile falter. You just reach for your toast, keeping your tone light. âThatâs the nicest thing youâve said to me so far.â
He huffs through his nose, shaking his head, but then it happensâan actual laugh. Low, short, almost like he didnât mean for it to escape.
You freeze mid-bite, eyes widening. âWait.â You set the toast down carefully, pointing at him with exaggerated seriousness. âWas that a laugh? Did I just make you laugh?â
Harry smirks, trying to bury it behind his mug, but you catch the way his shoulders shake slightly.
âOh my god, it was a laugh!â you say, grinning so wide it hurts. âI should write this down. Mark the date and time.â
He groans, rubbing a hand over his face, but you swear thereâs still the ghost of a smile tugging at his lips.
âYouâre ridiculous,â he mutters, but itâs softer than usualâlighter, almost fond.
And you canât stop staring at him, at how different he looks in that moment, not weighed down by walls or silence. For the first time since moving in, you feel like youâve just caught a glimpse of the Harry that lives underneath the rules, the stern looks, the quiet.
And it makes you want to see it again.
That night, the apartment was unusually calm. You sat curled up on the couch, legs tucked beneath you, scrolling half-distractedly through your phone while the glow of the TV played in the background. Harry walked in from his room, hair still damp from a shower, and for a moment he just stood there, hovering like he wasnât sure whether to stay or retreat.
Then, quietly, he asked, âSo⌠the audition?â
Your head snapped up, eyes wide. You hadnât expected him to bring it up. Not him.
âItââ your voice cracked on the first word, and you laughed nervously, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. âIt actually went really well.â
Harry tilted his head, watching you closely, waiting for you to go on.
âThey said I had something different, that I wasnât like the others. I swear I thought Iâd bombed it, but thenâthen they called me back in and said they wanted me for the part. I couldnât believe it!â
You were grinning so hard your cheeks ached, your words spilling out like water bursting through a dam. You told him every detailâthe waiting room, the nerves, the moment they said your name.
And Harry⌠he listened.
Not with that half-distracted air he usually carried, not with the distant coolness youâd grown used to. He leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, eyes fixed on you as though your joy was something rare, something worth holding on to.
When you finally stopped for breath, cheeks flushed, he gave the smallest nod. âKnew theyâd see it.â
Your smile faltered just a little. âYou⌠what?â
Harry shrugged, but his lips tugged in a tiny almost-smile. âKnew theyâd pick you. You light up when you talk about itâitâs hard not to notice.â
Your chest tightened at his words, unexpected warmth rising in your throat.
And then, as if he realized heâd said too much, he cleared his throat and straightened. âIf you need help practicing⌠lines or whateverâyou can⌠ask me.â
You blinked at him, stunned. âYouâd actually do that?â
His eyes flicked away, a faint pink brushing his cheeks. âDonât expect me to be good at it. But yeah. Iâd help.â
For a long moment, you just stared at him, smiling so wide it was almost ridiculous. âHarry Styles, volunteering to rehearse lines with me. I should definitely mark the date and time for this too.â
He let out another one of those quick, reluctant laughs, shaking his head as he muttered, âYouâre impossible.â
But you noticed the way his eyes lingered on you, softer now, like he was secretly glad you were.
đ
The first time, it was the rain.
You hadnât realized the sky had cracked open until you were already halfway back from the store, juggling two bags of groceries and drenched head to toe. By the time you stumbled into the apartment, your hair was plastered to your cheeks, sundress clinging uncomfortably to your skin.
Harry appeared from the hallway almost instantly, eyes widening. âBloody hellââ He grabbed a towel from the closet and pressed it into your hands before you could even drip onto the rug.
âTake a shower. Now,â he said firmly, another towel already tossed over your shoulders. âYouâll catch a cold if you stay like that.â
You blinked up at him, water dripping from your lashes, lips curving into a small, surprised smile. âYou sound like my grandma.â
âDonât argue,â he muttered, turning toward the kitchen. âGo. Iâll make you tea.â
And you didâheart thudding at the thought of him in there, waiting with a steaming mug when you came back warm and dry.
The second time, it was the couch
Youâd meant to just rest your eyes for a second, the script still open on your lap as you curled up on the couch. But when Harry came back into the living room, he found you fast asleep, cheek smushed against the cushion, soft breaths evening out.
For a long moment, he just stood there, frozen.
Then, carefully, quietly, he slipped into your room and returned with your blanket. He shook it out once, then draped it gently over you, making sure it tucked around your shoulders.
You stirred, shifting slightly under the sudden warmth, but didnât wake.
Harry lingered only a second longer, watching the way your lips parted in sleep, the faint crease between your brows softening as you relaxed deeper. Then he turned off the lamp, leaving just the glow of the hallway light behind, and disappeared back to his room.
You didnât know why you woke up the next morning with your blanket around you. But you smiled when you did.
đ
The door rattles open and you glance up from the couch just in time to see Harry come in, shoulders hunched from the late evening chill, arms weighed down with two grocery bags. His curls are damp at the edges, a sure sign he walked the last blocks in a fine drizzle, and thereâs something about the way he kicks the door shut behind him, exhaling like the weight of the day is still clinging to him, that makes you smile.
âLet me helpâ you say, standing and automatically moving toward him.
He shrugs, setting one of the bags on the counter with a heavy thud. âItâs fineâ he says.
You reach for the other bag before he can protest, pulling out a carton of milk, a loaf of bread, a pack of pasta. âStill,â you say, lining them neatly on the counter. You shake your head at the way he always fusses with the smallest things, then reach deeper into the bag â and freeze.
Because tucked between his usual oat milk and black coffee beans, you find it. Your cereal. The one brand you always keep on the top shelf, half-hidden because it feels a little childish. And right after that, your favorite kind of chips. The exact flavor youâd torn through last week.
You turn, eyes widening, the box in your hand like evidence. âHarry,â you say, your voice pitched higher than you intend, âyou bought my cereal.â
He glances over, expression unreadable, like maybe he hadnât expected you to notice so soon. Then, with a casual roll of his shoulders, he says, âSaw you were running low.â
Thatâs it. No grin, no joke, no acknowledgment of what it means. Just a quiet, almost dismissive explanation, like heâd picked up a spare roll of paper towels.
But your chest tightens, because you know him well enough now to read between the lines. You know this man who insists he doesnât care much about details but somehow notices when youâre down to your last coffee pod, who pretends he doesnât listen yet recalls every small thing you mention. You know, and your heart beats faster because of it.
âYou noticed?â you ask softly, unable to keep the excitement from lacing your words.
Harry exhales a laugh through his nose, reaching for the bread as if that might save him from answering. âHard not to. You have a whole ritual with it every morning. Box was nearly empty yesterday.â
Thereâs a warmth in his tone he doesnât seem aware of, a fondness tucked into the edges. You canât stop staring at him, at the way his profile looks in the golden kitchen light, jaw tight like heâs holding something back.
You want to tease him â you want to say, Since when do you pay that much attention to me? â but the words stick in your throat, too fragile to risk. Instead you smile, wide and giddy, and tuck the cereal against your chest like a prize.
Harry finally looks at you then, eyes flicking to your grin, and for a fleeting second his calm mask falters. His lips twitch as though he might smile too, then he clears his throat, busying himself with lining cans in the cupboard.
But the air has shifted. You can feel it humming in the space between you, charged and bright.
âThank you,â you say at last, voice softer than before.
He shrugs again, but slower this time, like the gesture costs him something. âDonât mention it.â
And in that silence, something clicks in you.
This isnât about groceries. Itâs not about cereal or chips or keeping track of whatâs running low. Itâs about him seeing you. About the way he canât help but take care of you, even if he doesnât have the words for why.
And maybe itâs about you too â the way your pulse races, the way youâre suddenly warm all over at the thought that Harry notices, that Harry cares.
You bite your lip to keep from laughing, because the happiness bubbling inside feels too much, too obvious. But he hears it anyway, the little sound that escapes, and he glances back with raised brows.
âWhatâs funny?â he asks.
You shake your head quickly, grinning like you canât stop. âNothing.âÂ
Harry studies you, long enough that you almost squirm under his gaze. Then, to your shock, his mouth curves into the smallest, softest smile. The kind you havenât seen from him before. And itâs enough to make your breath catch, because you realize he isnât annoyed, he isnât brushing you off. Heâs letting you see it â the quiet, hidden piece of him that wants to make you happy.
And standing there in your shared kitchen, surrounded by groceries and rain-damp air, you know: this is how it begins.
đ
Harry stood frozen at the edge of the sidewalk, staring at the flower shop window like it had personally offended him. Bouquets of bright pink peonies and sunbursts of yellow tulips smiled back through the glass, an explosion of color against the gray street. He adjusted his leather jacket, jaw tight.
âThis is ridiculous. Iâm going.â He muttered it more to himself than anyone, already shifting his weight as if he could walk away from the whole idea.
Before he could move, Sam caught his arm, grip firm. âNope. Not a chance.â
Harry turned, glaring at his best friend. Sam only raised a brow, smug. The two of them â tall, dressed in black, boots scuffed from late nights in dingy bars â looked wildly out of place lingering outside a flower shop. Like predators afraid of bouquets.
âYou heard me,â Sam went on, nodding toward the cheerful window display. âShe just finished her first big project. You need a way to say you care. To show her youâre proud. That you want to celebrate her.â His grin widened as Harryâs scowl deepened. âThat you liiike he-e-er.â The last words came in a sing-song tone that made Harry want to sink into the pavement.
âShut up,â Harry snapped, heat creeping up the back of his neck. âI donât like her.â
Samâs gaze flicked to Harryâs cheeks, now faintly pink. âMm-hm,â he said, drawing the sound out like it was a verdict. âSure you donât.â
Harry jerked his arm free, but he didnât move away. He looked back at the flower shop, heart thudding. Inside, a florist was rearranging a bucket of roses, humming to herself. It should have been simple: walk in, pick something, leave. But every single bunch looked like it might scream too much or not enough.
He rubbed a hand across his jaw. âWhat flowers do you even buy for⌠a literal flower?â The words slipped out, low and almost pained.
Sam burst out laughing, earning a glare sharp enough to cut glass. âOh, thatâs rich. Manâs out here buying her favorite snacks one week and canât figure out if daisies are too obvious.â
Harry shoved his hands into his pockets, muttering, âForget it. She doesnât even like this kind of thing.â
âOh, she does,â Sam countered immediately. âSheâs the type to light up over something thoughtful, doesnât matter if itâs a fifty-dollar bouquet or one daisy wrapped in paper.â
Harry exhaled slowly, eyes flicking back to the flowers. He could already imagine your smile if he got it right â that warm, unstoppable kind that made his chest ache. And that was the problem.
Sam gave him a push toward the door. âGo on. Worst case, you leave with nothing but pollen on your jacket. Best case⌠she keeps smiling at you.â
Harry hesitated, but his hand found the shopâs door handle anyway.
The little bell over the door chimed as Harry stepped inside, shoulders tense like heâd walked into enemy territory instead of a flower shop. The air was thick with perfume â roses, lilies, carnations, all blending into something both sweet and overwhelming. He shoved his hands deeper into his pockets, scanning the room like he might find a sign that said For Sunshine, Buy These. Because of course he started to call her sunshine in his mind.
The florist, a woman in her fifties with kind eyes and pruning shears tucked in her apron, glanced up. âLooking for something special?â
Harry cleared his throat. âUh⌠yeah. Something like that.â His voice came out rougher than intended.
Sam was already poking around the displays behind him, whistling, enjoying every second of Harryâs discomfort.
The florist tilted her head. âAnniversary? Birthday?â
Harryâs jaw flexed. He hated this. Hated how easily the question made his pulse spike. âNo. Just⌠congratulations.â
âOn what?â she asked pleasantly.
He hesitated. Saying her first big film went well out loud felt like exposing too much. Like admitting that he listened to you when you talked about your dreams, that he stored the details away. He shifted his weight. âWork thing.â
âGot it.â She smiled knowingly. âSomething cheerful, then. Something that says Iâm proud of you.â
She guided him toward a bucket of sunflowers, tall and golden, their faces practically glowing. Harry stopped dead, staring at them. Sunflowers. Too on the nose. Too obvious.
Sam sidled up beside him, grin wide. âPerfect. Literal sunshine for your sunshine.â
Harry gave him a look that could kill. âNo.â
He turned away, landing on a bunch of white daisies. Simple. Fresh. Not too heavy with meaning. But then his eyes caught on a cluster of yellow tulips, soft and elegant, like bottled warmth. Then there were the roses â classic, romantic, dangerous.
âThis is a nightmare,â he muttered under his breath.
The florist chuckled, watching him circle like a trapped animal. âWhatâs she like?â
Harry blinked. âWhat?â
âThe person youâre buying for. Whatâs she like? That usually helps.â
For a moment, his throat went dry. What were you like? He could list a thousand things, all of them lodged in his chest. You were bright. Brave. You filled a room without even trying. You had this way of making silence feel less heavy. You made him laugh when he thought he couldnât anymore.
âSheâsâŚâ He swallowed hard. âSheâs a lot. In a good way.â
The floristâs smile deepened. âThen you need something that wonât be swallowed by her light. Something that will stand beside it.â
Her hand landed on a bunch of mixed wildflowers â yellows, whites, soft pinks, all tangled together like summer in a bouquet. Not too polished, not too formal. Just⌠alive.
Harry stared at them. They werenât overwhelming. They werenât clichĂŠ. They looked like something youâd actually put in a jar on the kitchen counter and smile at every morning.
Sam leaned close, whispering, âIf you donât get those, I will.â
Harry sighed, shoving a hand through his hair. âFine.â
When the florist wrapped the bouquet in brown paper, tying it off with twine, Harryâs stomach twisted. It felt like too much and not enough all at once. He paid quickly, muttering a thanks, and bolted out into the street before he could change his mind.
Sam followed, smirking. âYouâre so gone for her, man.â
âShut up,â Harry said again, but this time the words lacked bite. He held the flowers carefully in one hand, staring at them like they might reveal whether this was a mistake.
đ
By the time Harry reached the apartment building, his palms were damp against the brown paper wrapping. The bouquet crinkled softly every time he adjusted his grip, and it drove him mad how fragile it felt in his hand â how fragile he felt, standing there with something so bright meant for you.
He stopped outside the door to 301, heart thudding in his ears. The hallway was quiet, save for the hum of the overhead lights. He shifted his weight from one boot to the other, jaw tight, the words he thought heâd say looping in his head and tangling every time.
Congrats. That sounds stupid. You deserve these. Too much. Saw these and thought of you. Christ, no. Sheâll know. Sheâll know.
Harry scrubbed a hand over his face, muttering under his breath. âItâs flowers, not a bloody marriage proposal.â
Still, his chest tightened every time he pictured your reaction. Would you laugh? Tease him? Smile that blinding smile and make him feel like he was standing in the sun without a way to shield himself?
He tried to rehearse it again.
Hey, you did good. Proud of you. The words burned his tongue even in thought. Pride wasnât something he knew how to hand out. Not even to himself.
He took a deep breath, staring at the door handle like it might bite him. He could still turn back. Leave the flowers on the kitchen counter, no note, no explanation. Youâd find them and never know it took him ten minutes of pacing in the hallway to gather the courage.
But something in him â the same reckless thread that had pushed him onto stages, that had kept him from walking away the first time he saw your smile â held him there.
Harry tightened his grip on the bouquet, exhaled slowly, and muttered, âAlright. Just⌠donât be a dick about it.â
Then, finally, he turned the key and stepped inside.
You were sitting cross-legged on the couch, laptop balanced on your knees, still buzzing from the last few texts your best friend had sent congratulating you. The front door clicked open, and you glanced up. Harry stepped in, shoulders hunched, leather jacket half-unzipped, a bouquet of wildflowers in his hand like it was a weapon he didnât know how to wield.
Your eyes widened instantly. âOh my god⌠are thoseâ?â
He cleared his throat, eyes flicking everywhere but at you. âHeard the short film closed well and, uh, wanted to⌠congratulate you. To likeââ He winced, adjusting his grip on the flowers. âBe proud. I meanâI am proud. Like⌠yeah.â His voice trailed off into a mumble.
Your heart soared so hard it nearly hurt. Harry. Harry, who never said more than a few clipped words if he could help it, was standing there in your living room, cheeks faintly pink, tripping over sentences just to tell you he was proud.
You practically flew off the couch, grabbing the flowers before he could change his mind. The brown paper crinkled under your fingers, and the colors of the wildflowers were so bright they looked stolen from a dream. âHarry! These are gorgeous!â
He scratched the back of his neck, lips twitching like he was fighting a smile. âTheyâre just⌠flowers.â
âNo, no, theyâre not just flowers,â you insisted, spinning once with the bouquet clutched to your chest. âTheyâre beautiful, and theyâre thoughtful, andââ you stopped mid-sentence, breathless with excitement. âCan I hug you? Please let me!â
Harry froze. You saw the hesitation flicker across his face, like his brain was trying to process the request through a hundred filters of rules and walls and distance. But then his shoulders dropped just slightly, the fight leaving him.
âYeah,â he said quietly, almost like he was giving permission to himself more than to you.
You didnât wait a second longer. You wrapped your arms around him, burying your face against his chest, the flowers squished between you both. He smelled like rain and coffee and something distinctly him. For a moment, his arms hovered awkwardly at his sides, and thenâslowly, cautiouslyâthey came up to hold you back.
The hug lingered longer than you thought it would. You could feel his heartbeat against your cheek, steady but a little fast, and it made you smile even wider. When you finally pulled back, you kept bouncing on your toes, clutching the bouquet like it was the most precious thing anyone had ever given you.
âHarry, I love them so much. You donât understand. No oneâs ever given me flowers before, not like this. And you remembered about the short film! And you said youâre proud, oh my godâdo you know how much that means? I swear my heart is going to explode right now. And we have to see the short film together!â
You were rambling, words spilling out faster than you could control, but you didnât care. The happiness was too much to hold in, and you wanted him to feel all of it.
Harryâs ears were pink, his lips pressed into a thin line like he was trying desperately to keep them from twitching into a smile. âYouâre⌠youâre making a big deal out of it,â he muttered, gaze darting to the floor.
âIt is a big deal!â you insisted, hugging the bouquet tighter. âItâs huge. Itâsâyouâre huge, in like, the nicest way possible. Do you realize how sweet this is?â
He gave a tiny huff of breath, almost a laugh, and dragged a hand down his face. âChrist, youâre loud when youâre happy.â
But you caught itâthe way his voice was softer, lighter than usual, like he wasnât actually annoyed. His hand lingered on the back of his neck, nervous, but his eyes flicked to yours and didnât look away as quickly as they usually did.
âSorry,â you said through a grin you couldnât tame. âI just canât stop smiling. Youâve basically ruined me for the rest of the night. Iâll probably go to sleep smiling, thanks to you.â
That earned you another almost-laugh, the sound breaking past his defenses before he could stop it. It was small, quick, but it was there, and your chest lit up like fireworks.
You gasped dramatically. âOh my god, was that a laugh? Did I just make Harry laugh AGAIN?â
âDonât push it,â he warned, but there was no edge in his voice this time.
You held the bouquet up between you both, wiggling it slightly. âNew rule,â you teased, your eyes bright. âYouâre not allowed to say youâre not sweet. Evidence: right here.â
Harry rolled his eyes, but you didnât miss the way his lips curled at the edges, traitorous and soft. And you thought, maybe, just maybe, you were starting to find the cracks in his walls.
You darted off to the kitchen to rummage for a vase, humming happily under your breath, the bouquet cradled like treasure. Harry stayed rooted where he stood, watching you move around with that unstoppable glow in your smile, and something inside him shifted so sharply he almost stumbled.
The walls he had spent years stacking brick by brickârules, silence, distanceâfelt flimsy now, like paper left out in the rain. All because you had looked at him with that much joy over something as simple as a bunch of flowers.
He let out a low chuckle, surprising even himself. It wasnât the short, bitter sound he usually made. It was lighter, easier. And in that moment, he realized there wasnât a better feeling in the world than putting that smile on your face.
Harry leaned against the doorway, arms crossed loosely but no tension in his shoulders, watching you arrange the wildflowers into a vase far too small, your tongue sticking out a little in concentration. His lips twitched upward again, the warmth curling in his chest so foreign it almost scared him.
Bloody hell, he thought, shaking his head at himself, but he couldnât look away.
And for the first time in years, Harry didnât feel like hiding.
The flowers were still on the counter days later, their petals unfurling lazily toward the sun that spilled through the apartment windows. You made a habit of topping up the water every morning before rushing out to run errands, humming like you always did. Harry noticed. He noticed more than he cared to admit.
Because every time he passed the vase, he felt the faintest tug in his chestâlike a reminder of how your eyes had lit up when heâd handed them over. He hadnât meant it to mean anything, hadnât thought through the weight of the gesture. But the memory of your grin lodged itself inside him, stubborn as ever.
Harry had never been good at lingering feelings. He was used to shutting doors before they creaked open, keeping people at armâs length with clipped words and that hardened look that usually made strangers back away. But now, somehow, his sharp edges felt dulled around you. And worseâhe didnât hate it.
Then one day he found himself outside your audition building. He hadnât planned it, not really. He had errands to run downtown, but when his phone buzzed with your quick textâHeading in now, wish me luck!âhis feet had moved on their own.
He leaned against the brick wall across the street, cap tugged low, trying to look casual even though his stomach felt oddly tight. He wasnât even sure what he was waiting for. Maybe to make sure you didnât walk out looking defeated. Maybe just to⌠see.
And sure enough, twenty minutes later you appeared, clutching your bag, your shoulders slumped just slightly. Not devastated, just tired. He almost turned backâalmost let you walk home without knowing he was there. But then you spotted him.
âHarry?â you asked, surprise lifting your voice.
He shrugged, forcing a lazy smirk. âDonât look so shocked. I was nearby.â
Your eyes softened instantly, the tiredness draining as quickly as it had come. âYou came.â
âDonât make a big deal of it.â But it was a big deal, and you knew it. The smile you gave him in returnâit was softer than the one you wore when you were excited, but just as powerful. Something in him unclenched again.
It started happening in small ways after that.
He brewed an extra cup of tea in the mornings, leaving it on the counter beside your travel mug without a word. You always noticed. He began timing his grocery runs around yours, carrying the heavier bags without you asking. When you protested, he muttered something about how your arms were too scrawny for the weight, but his grin betrayed him.
Even his silences changed. Before, they had been sharp, pointed, a barrier between him and the world. Now they were softer. Sometimes he lingered in the kitchen while you cooked, leaning against the counter, just listening to you ramble about your day. He didnât always answer, but his eyes stayed fixed on you in a way that made your cheeks burn.
And you noticed. Of course you did.
By the end of the week, the flowers on the counter had begun to wilt. Their petals curled, drooping against the glass. You went to toss them, but Harry stopped you.
âLeave âem,â he said quietly.
You tilted your head. âTheyâre dying, Harry.â
His jaw flexed, like he was fighting with himself, then he let out a sigh. âStill pretty, though. Donât need to get rid of âem just yet.â
You blinked at him, caught off guard by the softness in his tone. Something unspoken passed between you, thick in the air.
The apartment felt quiet when you came home that night, the city noises muted behind the closed door. Your shoulders sagged with the weight of the dayâanother audition that hadnât gone as planned, another reminder that the road ahead was harder than youâd imagined. You just wanted to collapse onto your bed and disappear under the covers.
But before you could even cross the threshold to your room, Harry appeared from the kitchen, eyes soft but sharp, like he could read every ounce of your fatigue and disappointment the moment you stepped inside.
âYouâre home early,â he said, voice calm, but there was an edge of⌠concern? Anticipation? You couldnât quite place it.
You barely managed a shrug. âYeah⌠rough day.â
He tilted his head, that familiar furrow in his brow settling, and the corners of his lips twitched ever so slightly. âSit down,â he said, almost a command. âIâm making dinner.â
You froze for a moment, unsure if you should protest, but the look in his eyesâsomething protective, insistentâmade you sink into a chair at the counter. He moved around the kitchen with surprising ease, chopping vegetables, stirring sauces, setting the table. And all the while, your chest warmed at the way he seemed to⌠notice you, notice everything.
It wasnât just dinner. It was the effort, the timing, the small attention to detail that made you feel like he wanted to take the dayâs weight off your shoulders, even if he didnât say it outright.
Finally, he plated the food with care, sliding a dish in front of you. âFor sunshine,â he said, almost shyly, but with enough confidence that you felt it in your chest before your mind even processed it.
You blinked, a laugh escaping your lips before you could stop it. âDid you just?...â
He shifted, cheeks coloring faintly, but he didnât address the nickname. Instead, he placed a plate in front of himself, muttering under his breath, âFor me,â though his eyes kept flicking to yours, trying not to betray the fluster creeping across his face.
Your fingers itched to reach across the table and touch his hand, just to confirm he was real, and that he had called you that. You smiled so wide it felt like your cheeks would hurt later.
He rolled his eyes, pretending to check the pasta on his plate, though the corner of his mouth betrayed a tiny, victorious grin. âDonât make it weird,â he murmured, voice low, but there was no sharpness in it this time.
Your heart thudded. Weird? Thatâs exactly what it wasâbut the best kind of weird. The kind that made your chest feel light, like you could laugh and cry and grin all at once.
You reached for your fork, but couldnât resist sneaking a glance at him every few seconds, catching the subtle tension in his shoulders, the way his jaw flexed as if holding back words or feelings. You didnât have to say anythingâheâd made himself clear in the softest way possible.
And as you ate, you realized something: Weeks of slow, careful pacing had allowed this moment to exist, allowed him to start showing his feelings in the smallest, most intimate ways. You hadnât pushed, hadnât demanded, and in return, he was giving pieces of himself that no one else had ever gotten.
The two of you ate in quiet companionship, the kind that didnât need constant chatter, the kind where glances and half-smiles said more than words could. You felt warmth in your chest, a smile tugging at your lips, because thisâthis effort, this subtle affectionâwas far more meaningful than any grand gesture.
When the last bite was gone, he finally looked up at you, eyes soft but alive. âYou like it?â he asked quietly, almost as if asking for permission to care this much.
You nodded, heart swelling. âI love it. Thank you⌠for everything,â you said, voice catching slightly.
Harryâs lips twitched, and for the first time, you heard the sound of him laughingâa low, easy chuckle that felt like it belonged only to you. You blinked, surprised and elated, and that laughter wrapped around you, lifting away the tension of the day.
đ
The nickname had started to settle into your days, quiet and teasing, but every time you saw it, your chest did that little flutter.
One afternoon, your phone buzzed while you were curled up on the couch reading. You picked it up and grinned.
Harry: âSunshine, Iâm at the Chinese place. Do you want spicy or not spicy?â
You rolled your eyes, but the smile didnât leave your face.
âSpicy please!â
.
A few days later, you were doing laundry together in the cramped laundry room of the apartment building. You were folding your clothes into neat piles when Harry appeared behind you, holding a shirt in his hands.
âSunshine,â he said, voice calm but eyes narrowing in mock suspicion. âIs this shirt yours?â
You froze for a second, caught off guard. âOh yes! unless you want to wear a pink shirt i can lend it to youâ
.
Over the next week, it became harder to keep track of how often he used it.
âSunshine, can you grab some coffee with me later or do I need to bribe you?â
âSunshine, your favorite yogurt is on the counter. Donât eat it all in one sitting.â
.
You werenât in the room, but Harryâs thoughts were tangled with you so tightly that even the familiar clatter of his bandmates backstage couldnât shake it. He leaned against the counter, guitar case propped nearby, as Sam pulled up a stool beside him, arms crossed.
âYouâre an idiot,â Sam said bluntly, shaking his head. âSeriously, Harry. Sunshine? Really? Youâre calling her Sunshine and doing⌠what? Nothing?â
Harry snorted, but it came out tight, defensive. âItâs⌠not that simple.â
âOh, come on,â Sam continued, leaning closer, voice dropping. âYouâve been staring at her like sheâs the only person in the world since day one. You call her Sunshine, you text her like sheâs the most important person in your life, and then you⌠donât move. Donât ask her out, donât kiss her, donâtââ
Harry rubbed the back of his neck, jaw tight. âI donât know if she⌠I mean⌠Iâm not sure sheââ
Sam barked a short laugh, cutting him off. âSheâs not going to push. Sheâs too smart for that. Youâve got a girl whoâs clearly fallen for you without you even asking, and youâre just⌠sitting there, letting her wait. For what? For you to figure out how to be brave?â
âIâshe doesnât even knowâŚâ Harry muttered, then trailed off, shaking his head.
Sam slammed a hand on the counter. âShe doesnât know because youâre not acting like someone who wants to be with her! Sheâs giving you space, Harry, because she can read you. Sheâs not stupidâshe knows youâre figuring yourself out. But that doesnât mean sheâs going to wait forever. And you? Youâre losing your chance because you canât admit you want her as much as she clearly wants you.â
Harry stared down at the counter, chest tight. âItâs not that I donât want her. I⌠I justââ
âJust what?â Sam pressed, eyebrow raised. âYouâre in love with her, arenât you?â
Harry let out a breath, the sound almost inaudible over the low hum of the bar. âI⌠maybe I am,â he admitted, voice low, almost a whisper. âBut what if she⌠what if she deserves more than⌠me? What if Iâm not ready?â
Sam laughedâharsh, incredulous, but full of exasperation. âHarry, sheâs giving you everything sheâs got without asking for anything in return. And youâre going to let your stupid fears get in the way of that? Sheâs already letting you in, Harry. Sheâs already letting you see her, trust her. And youâre over here pretending youâre not just as messed up as she is.â
Harry closed his eyes, jaw flexing. âItâs not just fear. I⌠I donât want to screw it up. Iâve neverânever let anyone in like this.â
Sam leaned back, hands on his hips, voice softer now but still firm. âThen stop overthinking. Be honest. Stop hiding behind your grumpy wall. Sheâs waiting, yeah, but sheâs also not going to wait forever. You need to act. And right now, while sheâs still smiling at your stupid little jokes and calling her âSunshineâ without a clue that youâre a mess for herâyou need to do something. Or youâll regret it.â
Harry let out a long breath, leaning back against the counter. His mind was spinning, a mix of panic and longing. Do something. That simple phrase echoed, hitting him harder than he expected.
đ
The bar was buzzing that night, louder than usual, packed with bodies swaying to the music and laughter spilling into every corner. You slipped inside, excitement practically vibrating through your chest. Even in the crowd, you found your usual spot in the first row, close enough to see the faint sheen of sweat on Harryâs forehead as he tuned his guitar.
Your heart was racing for more than just the music. Youâd told yourself to keep it casual, just congratulating him, letting him know you were proud. But now, standing here in the thrumming energy of the crowd, you felt every nerve in your body tingle.
The lights dimmed, the chatter quieted, and Harry and his band launched into their first song. The sound hit you like a wave, the guitar warm and alive under his fingers, the drums steady and grounding. You sang along quietly under your breath, a little off-key, a little breathless, but entirely immersed.
Harryâs eyes caught yours during the second chorus. That flicker, that subtle acknowledgment, made your chest tighten. His lips quirked up in a small, almost shy smileâsweat glistening on his forehead, his hair sticking slightly to the side of his faceâand it made your heart thump faster.
The songs flew by, each one tighter, sharper, more electric than the last. You cheered, clapped, and swayed with the crowd, but your focus never wavered. You were there for him, for the music, but also for the man behind itâthe one who had somehow worked his way into the corners of your thoughts, the one who called you Sunshine in a way that made your stomach flip.
Finally, the set ended. The crowd roared, hands clapping, whistles and cheers echoing through the small bar. Harryâs chest heaved slightly as he nodded to the band, brushing his hair back and taking in the applause. And youâwell, you couldnât wait for him to come to you. Waiting felt unbearable.
So, without thinking too much, you ducked through the side door that led backstage, weaving between cables, guitar cases, and scattered sheets of music. The air smelled of sweat and wood polish, still warm from the energy of the show. And then you saw him.
He was leaning against a table, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, guitar strap slipping slightly off one shoulder, chest still rising and falling rapidly from adrenaline. You couldnât help but grin, practically bouncing in place.
âHarry! That wasâoh my goshâyou guys were amazing! Seriously, Iâve never seen anything like itâyour energy, the sound, theââ You babbled, words tumbling over each other, cheeks flushed from excitement and heat.
He lifted his hand, gently but firmly holding it against your shoulder, stopping you mid-rant. âWhoa, hey,â he said, voice low but warm, eyes searching yours. âIâI heard you from the crowd⌠what are you doing here?â
You nodded vigorously, cheeks still burning. âI had to! I justâI had to tell you⌠You were incredible! The whole band, the new songs, everything! I canât evenââ
And then, almost before you could catch the breath in your chest, his hands found your face, quick but steady.
Your words froze in your throat as his lips clashed against yours, soft but urgent, shutting down everything you were about to say. You felt his heartbeat thump against your own, a rapid, uncontainable rhythm that made your chest ache in the best way possible.
It was over in seconds, but those seconds were infinite. When he finally pulled back slightly, forehead resting against yours, eyes dark and luminous, you could barely breathe. His hands lingered, fingers lightly tracing your jaw, and he exhaled, almost a sigh of relief.
âI couldnât⌠I couldnât wait anymore,â he muttered, voice hoarse but steady, eyes locked on yours. âYou⌠you make meâeverything else doesnât matter when youâre here.â
You blinked, still catching your breath, and then the grin spread across your face, unstoppable. âYou really mean that?â you whispered, voice trembling with joy and disbelief.
He nodded, leaning in again for a soft brush of lips, more tentative this time, like he was testing the water before diving in. âEvery word,â he said, and you could feel the sincerity wrapping around you like a warm blanket.
You laughed softly, a sound of pure delight, and your fingers curled around his wrists, grounding yourself to him, to the moment. âI think⌠I think Iâve wanted this for forever,â you admitted, heart pounding in your chest. âSeeing you up there, doing what you love, and⌠and knowing Iâm here with youâitâs too much happiness for one person.â
Harryâs grin was slow and deliberate, the kind that crumbled walls and set everything on fire at once. âWell⌠guess Iâm selfish then,â he murmured, pressing another quick kiss to your forehead, âbecause I want all of it. You. Me. Right here. Right now.â
You felt yourself melt into him, laughing softly at his words, at his seriousness, at the way this moment, this utterly chaotic, perfect, heart-thumping moment, felt like it had always been meant to happen.
He pulled back just slightly, forehead resting against yours again, hands still cradling your face. âI donât know how I kept quiet for so long,â he admitted, voice almost a whisper. âSeeing you⌠being here, cheering me on⌠it justâit made it impossible. Youâre everything, Sunshine.â
You shivered, caught between disbelief and pure happiness, heart racing so fast it was almost painful. âIâm so glad⌠you didnât,â you said softly, brushing your fingers against his jaw.
His laugh, that soft, almost nervous chuckle youâd come to adore, broke through. âYeah,â he said, voice still trembling slightly, âbecause I⌠I think Iâm in trouble now.â
You laughed too, breathless and giddy, pressing your lips to his once more, slower this time, savoring the sweetness and heat of it, letting yourself sink fully into the moment. The music from the stage faded behind you, the world outside blurred into insignificance.
Here, in this warm, sticky backstage room, amidst sweat and cables, the two of you existed entirely for each other. And for the first time, you both let go of every hesitation, every wall, every unspoken fear, surrendering to what had been building quietly between you for weeks.
When you finally pulled back, both of you breathing heavily, Harry rested his forehead against yours again, eyes soft but sparkling. âYouâre really⌠something else, Sunshine,â he murmured, voice rough with emotion and amusement.
You grinned, heart soaring. âI could say the same about you,â you whispered. âBut I think⌠I think I already know.â
And as he leaned in for one more kiss, just soft and lingering this time, you realized that nothingâno awkwardness, no grumpy walls, no slow-burn tensionâhad ever felt so perfectly, completely right.
The ride home was quiet, both of you lost in the aftermath of what had just happened, the city lights streaking past the windows like sparks against the dark. Your fingers brushed once, then again, and neither of you pulled away.Â
Once inside the apartment, the silence felt differentâwarmer, charged with something that wasnât there before. You set your bag down by the door, glancing at him. He looked⌠vulnerable. A little unsure. That rough, grumpy facade softened into something else entirely, something open, something that made your chest flutter.
âUhâŚâ he started, scratching the back of his neck, gaze darting around like he was trying to find the words in the air. âSo⌠uh⌠youâwant something to drink? Or⌠or do you wantââ
You tilted your head, noticing the hesitation. âI⌠uh⌠Iâm okay,â you said softly, voice tentative, but there was a small smile on your lips. âYou?â
He exhaled slowly, like heâd been holding his breath. âYeah. Iâm⌠good,â he said, trying to sound casual, but the slight hitch in his tone betrayed him. His hands fidgeted with the hem of his shirt.
You could see it in the way he shifted from foot to foot, in the way his eyes kept flicking to your face. He wantedâneededâyou to be close, but didnât know how to bridge that gap between the living room and the sanctuary of his bedroom.
âIâuhâŚâ He took a step forward, then stopped. âYou⌠you can⌠um⌠if you want, you can sleep in my room tonight. Or⌠I meanâŚâ His voice trailed off âIf thatâs okay. I⌠I justâŚâ
You blinked, heart leaping at his words. âIâd like that,â you said softly, the excitement and warmth pooling in your chest making your words sound breathless.
His eyes widened just slightly, a mixture of relief and surprise. âRight. Okay. Yeah. Sure. Uh⌠come on then,â he said, stepping aside to gesture toward the hallway, hands still slightly trembling at his sides.
You walked beside him, careful not to step too fast, letting the quiet tension settle around you. The apartment felt different nowânot just a space where you coexisted, but somewhere charged with new possibilities, charged with this strange, electric intimacy neither of you had dared to explore fully until now.
Once inside his room, you paused at the doorway, taking it all in. The soft lighting, the scattered music sheets, the guitar resting against the wallâit all felt like a glimpse into him, into the parts of Harry he rarely showed anyone. And now, here you were, allowed to be in it.
He cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. âUh⌠bedâs, uh⌠big enough. I⌠I mean, you canââ
You grinned, stepping in closer. âI know.â chuckling
He gave a short, almost nervous laugh, cheeks coloring faintly. âYeah.â he muttered. âYou⌠you make yourself comfortable. I⌠Iâll⌠uh⌠get ready.â
You watched as he shuffled toward his dresser, awkwardly fumbling with the sheets, avoiding your gaze, and you felt this strange, sweet tension settle between you. Neither of you wanted to make the first move too obvious, yet every small glance, every slight smile, every hesitant word carried meaning.
You slipped under the covers, hugging your knees, trying not to fidget too much, heart racing from both the adrenaline of the evening and the warmth of being this close to him. You could hear him moving, quietly, deliberately, preparing his side. Each creak of the floorboard, each soft shuffle made your chest flutter.
Finally, he settled beside you, a careful distance away, but close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from him. The silence stretched, comfortable yet charged, until he finally whispered, voice low and careful, âYou⌠okay?â
You nodded, smiling softly in the dim light. âYeah. Iâm⌠perfect,â you said. âWith you.â
His lips curved into the tiniest grin, almost imperceptible, but it made your heart leap. He let out a small, almost relieved chuckle. âGood,â he murmured. âBecause⌠I⌠yeah. Me too.â
You let out a quiet sigh, staring at the ceiling for a moment, then, before you could stop yourself, you burst out laughing. A full, uninhibited laugh that made Harry blink at you in surprise.
âYou know,â you said between giggles, turning slightly to face him, âweâre acting completely ridiculous. Both of us. Here, lying like a couple of teenagers, and weâre⌠I donât knowâŚâ You shrugged, still laughing, the tension in your chest finally breaking.
Harryâs jaw loosened, and a small, relieved chuckle escaped him. âYeahâŚâ he said softly, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
You couldnât help yourselfâyou scooted closer, brushing against him in a casual, playful way. âRidiculous together,â you added, grinning.
For a second, he froze, as if weighing the consequences of what to do next. And then, with a quiet determination that surprised even you, he shifted closer, letting his arm snake around your waist, pulling you gently into his chest. His head tucked just under your chin, careful but firm, as if anchoring himself to you while still testing the waters.
âI⌠uhâŚâ he mumbled against your hair, voice low and flustered, âI think Iâm good hereâ
You laughed again, letting your fingers trace lazy patterns over his arm. âLooks like youâre just finally admitting you want to cuddle.â
His cheeks colored faintly, and he gave a small, sheepish laugh. âMaybe. Just⌠maybe,â he admitted.
You snuggled against him, letting the warmth of his body seep into yours. âGood,â you whispered, smiling against the curve of his shoulder. âBecause I think this is exactly where weâre supposed to be.â
He chuckled, quiet but full of contentment, pulling you closer without a second thought. âYeah⌠yeah, youâre right,â he echoed, the words soft but loaded with everything he hadnât said yetâeverything he was feeling but still figuring out how to name.
Now, neither of you felt the need to overthink, to hesitate, to pretend to be brave. You were simply here, together, letting the closeness, the warmth, and the quiet joy of being with each other speak louder than any words ever could.
Over the next few weeks, a rhythm began to settle between you. It started smallâan arm brushing your waist as he settled in, a leg draping over yours almost absentmindedly. There was something comforting about letting him be needy, letting him rest his head against you like he had nowhere else in the world to be.
âSunshineâŚâ heâd murmur in the half-light, voice hoarse from just waking or from some unspoken longing. âStay⌠just five more minutes.â And youâd laugh, letting him curl tighter against you, heart thudding in a way that left you dizzy with affection.
One night youâd had a long day, auditions that went nowhere, and youâd come home frustrated and exhausted. Harry was still at the bar, and you found yourself curling up under his blankets
When he came back, he paused in the doorway, watching you curled against his pillow, and a slow, genuine smile spread across his face. âYouâre⌠making yourself at home, huh?â he teased softly, but the heat in his eyes told you he didnât mean it as a joke.
You grinned sleepily. âItâs your fault for having such comfy sheets.â
He walked over, climbing onto the bed carefully, like he didnât want to crush the tiny bubble of space youâd claimed. And thenâwithout thinking, without hesitationâhe curled up behind you, chest pressing lightly against your back, one arm thrown over your waist. âYou⌠you smell like happiness,â he whispered, voice low and husky. âAnd⌠I like it.â
You giggled, squeezing his hand, heart fluttering at how unguarded he suddenly was. âYouâre ridiculous,â you murmured.
He hummed, pressing his nose to the nape of your neck. âYeah⌠but Iâm yours,â he said softly, and you could feel the honesty in the words, the vulnerability that had been buried under weeks of grumpy, sarcastic walls. That night, he didnât just take up space in your bedâhe let you take up space in his heart, too.
Over time, these small habits became a flow. One night in your bed, one night in his. Sometimes he was clingy and needy; sometimes you were the one clinging, wrapping your arms around him while he hummed softly against your hair. The nickname âSunshineâ slipped into conversation naturally now, soft, teasing, and intimate.
One evening, after a long day where auditions had worn you thin, you found yourself on the sofa, sprawled out with a mug of tea, Harry settling beside you. You were laughing about some absurdity from the day, and his fingers found yours, entwining lazily. The warmth of his hand sent a shiver up your spine.
âI canât believe you actually said that,â he murmured, brushing a stray strand of hair from your face.
You leaned in closer, and without warning, he kissed you. Soft at first, testing, like he was still measuring the line between comfort and desire. You responded instinctively, lips parting, fingers tangling in his hair.
The kiss deepened, growing more urgent, more insistent. Your body pressed against his, heat pooling in your chest, in your stomach, in ways that made your breath hitch. And then, as his hands moved, you hesitatedâpulling back just slightly, heart thudding, eyes wide.
âHeyâŚâ he murmured, still close, his forehead resting against yours. âWhat is it?â
You swallowed hard, cheeks flushing bright pink. âI⌠Iâve never⌠with anyone,â you admitted, voice trembling, embarrassed. âI⌠I donât knowâŚâ
Harryâs eyes softened instantly, full of care and warmth, his hand cupping your cheek. âHey, hey,â he said gently, brushing his thumb across your jaw. âItâs okay. I⌠Iâm not here to rush you. Never.â
You breathed out, relief washing over you in a warm wave. âReally?â
âReally,â he said, voice steady but husky. â⌠Iâll want to make you feel good. In all ways. From now on.â
Your heart soared, and a shy, happy smile spread across your face. You nodded, pressing your lips to his in a gentle, lingering kiss, letting yourself trust him fully. He responded with a mixture of tenderness and desire, careful yet confident, guiding, attentive, letting you take the lead when you wanted, and holding you close when you needed it.
The heat built slowly, tenderly, as you explored the intimacy between you. His hands were gentle but purposeful, tracing lines along your body with a reverence that made you feel both safe and wanted. Every movement, every sigh, every whispered word from him was measured to comfort, to excite, to reassure.
By the time you finally pulled back, hearts racing and foreheads pressed together, the air around you felt electric. You laughed softly, breathless, and he mirrored you, chuckling low and warm.
âSunshineâŚâ he murmured, his voice thick with both amusement and desire. You smiled, curling against him, letting the weight of his arms hold you close.
âWe can try,â you whispered, heart pounding.
âOnly if you want,â he said softly, brushing his lips against yours.
âI want,â you replied, certainty in your voice.
That was all he needed. Slowly, deliberately, his hand slid up your shirt, moving with care and patience, waiting for your signal to go further. His lips never left yours, the kiss open, intimate, tongues beginning to meet in a gentle dance. When he felt your shoulders relax, he cupped your bra, squeezing just slightly, getting a small, breathy moan from you.
He smiled into the kiss, reading every reaction, every little sound, knowing you were not only enjoying this but trusting him completely.
âHave you⌠touched yourself before?â he murmured between breathy kisses, his other hand sliding your shirt upwards with deliberate gentleness.
âYes,â you admitted, a little embarrassed, but you knew it was natural.
âGood,â he whispered, voice low and warm. âTell me what you like, okay, Sunshine?â His lips trailed to your neck, pressing soft, teasing kisses, gently sucking without leaving marks⌠not yet.
âMâkay,â you breathed, your heart racing, your body tingling at the careful attention he gave you, the slow, patient way he explored, always making sure you felt safe and desired.
Your shirt slid up easily, and he paused for a moment, taking in the sight of you in that delicate beige tulle bra. He could already see your nipples through the sheer fabric, perked and inviting, silently begging for attention.
He lifted his gaze to your face, just for a momentâcheeks flushed, strands of hair sticking to your foreheadâevery detail of you was breathtaking, a true work of art. His fingers twitched lightly, wanting to trace every curve, every line, but he held back, savoring the view, letting the tension build, knowing how much you were trusting him.
He leaned in again, lips brushing the sensitive skin just above your bra, breathing warm against you. His fingers hovered for a moment at the edge of the tulle, teasingly light, waiting for you to shift, to give him permission to go further. Every little sigh, every subtle arch of your body told him exactly what you wanted, and he followed, patient, attentive.
âRelax, Sunshine,â he whispered, voice low and husky, pressing a gentle kiss to your collarbone. âJust⌠let me take care of you.â
You shivered, leaning into him instinctively, trusting him completely. His hands moved carefully, tracing the curve of your waist, sliding beneath the sheer fabric of your bra. He cupped you lightly, fingers pressing just enough to make you gasp softly, and he smiled against your skin, savoring your reaction.
âYou feel⌠amazing,â he murmured, thumbs brushing over your nipples. âSo soft⌠so perfect.â
Your hands found his shoulders, fingers gripping lightly as you closed your eyes, letting yourself melt under his touch. There was no rush, no pressureâjust him, you, and the quiet rhythm of your shared breaths.
He pulled back slightly, tilting your chin with a gentle finger, his eyes searching yours. âTell me if itâs too much⌠or if you want more.â
âI⌠I like it,â you breathed, cheeks still flushed, voice soft but full of trust. âI like⌠this. You.â
His smile was slow, a mixture of pride, desire, and pure awe. "Good," he whispered, pressing another feather-light kiss to your lips. His fingers drifted to the hem of your biker shorts, his touch both a question and a promise as his hands slid slowly to the curve of your ass. "Can I take these off?"
"Yeah, but... can you take something off too?" you asked, the words feeling like a shy favor.
"Of course," he said, a soft apology in his tone. He pulled his shirt over his head with a smooth, easy motion. You had seen his naked torso before, his tattoos like a map across his skin, but in this moment, it felt so differentâso vulnerable and real. With your eyes closed, your hands shyly found his abs, tracing the lines as if you were trying to memorize them.
When he tugged at your shorts, you pushed your hips up to give him easy access. The sight of you had him in a state of awe; a pair of beige tulle thongs were all that remained, their sheer fabric making his brain feel like mush. He could see the faint outline of your pussy lips and the darkening wet patch blooming against the material. He felt his own dick twitch inside his briefs, now fully hard, and unzipped his jeans to get them off and get comfortable.
You snuck a peek at him too, the hard shape of his cock so clearly defined in his briefs. A mix of nerves and desire swirled inside you, even as your own muscles clenched in anticipation.
"Has anyone tried to eat you out, sunshine?" he asked, his voice low.
"No," you whispered.
"Would you let me?" he asked, his voice breathy with need as he looked at that wet patch like a starving man.
"Yes," you whispered, the word barely audible. A flicker of self-consciousness crossed your mind; you had shaved a few days ago, but a light stubble had already returned. He didn't seem to notice, and if he did, he didn't care. He simply knelt before you. You parted your legs on the sofa, and he began to press open-mouthed kisses against the thin fabric of your thong. His tongue found you, tasting your sweet juices through the sheer material. Your hands, seemingly on their own, found their way into his hair, gripping it softly. Your hips instinctively bucked just the slightest. The scene was gloriously messy, your slick wetness and his eager kisses, while his hand moved in a soft, steady caress along your thighs and waist.
"Harry..." you moaned, the sound catching in your throat. "Uh..."
A wave of sensation washed over you as he moved the thin, damp fabric to the side, his tongue making direct, intoxicating contact. You let out a soft cry, a sound that was half gasp, half moan. Your hips pushed downward, a small, involuntary push that he met with a low groan against your skin. The sound was so deep, so full of his own pleasure, that it made you feel powerful.
His hand left your thigh, sliding between your folds as a single finger circled your clitoris. You tangled your fingers deeper into his hair, holding on tight as the world began to shrink to just the feel of his mouth, his touch, and the consuming heat building deep within you.
He slurped, kissed, and lapped with his tongue, a low, satisfied sound rumbling in his throat. "Sunshine... your taste... is addictive," he managed to say, his voice thick and low. Hearing your next moan, he went faster with his tongue against your clit, your own moans growing louder in response.
"Harry," you cried, your eyes squeezed shut, feeling how incredibly close you were.
"It's okay... just do what you want," he breathed between his deep kisses. "You look so pretty from here, sunshine. A perfect pussy, all for me."
"Uh... fuck," you said, the raw word escaping you. Hearing you swear for the first time in that state stirred something new in him. And without warning, you felt itâthat intense heat consuming your body. You came with a loud moan, a wave of pleasure washing through you. It was a dizzying surprise to look down and realize, in your blissful haze, that he had slipped two fingers inside you. His tongue was still on your clit, his fingers deep inside, and your body was clenching around him, a perfect, unspoken agreement.
He pushed himself up and leaned in, capturing your mouth in a soft kiss. You could taste yourself on him, a sweet and carnal flavor that only sent another jolt of desire through you. You were still coming down from the high, your body humming, your breath coming in deep, uneven gasps.
"You're perfect, sunshine," he murmured against your lips. "You look so good like this." He groaned the words into the kiss, pulling you closer. His right hand slid from your thigh to your hip, his thumb tracing the curve of your bone. The look in his eyes held a new promiseâthat this was just the beginning.
He kissed you, and with a hand still inside his briefs, he began to pump his dick. You noticed immediately, your gaze dropping to the visible movement.
"Teach me," you breathed, the words escaping you as you looked at the glistening tip peeking out. He pulled his head back, his eyes searching yours for a moment.
"You sure? We don't have to go all the way today," he said, his voice gentle but thick with desire.
"But I want to try," you insisted, the words a mix of curiosity and need.
"Fuck, sunshine," he moaned softly, a blend of surrender and excitement. Without another thought, he took your hand and placed it on his. His briefs were discarded, and now it was both of you, your hand guided by his, pumping his hard cock. The heat of him was a shock against your skin, a warm, pulsing weight that felt both foreign and thrillingly right.
He leaned in, his forehead pressed against yours. "Keep going," he groaned. "Just... like that. Your hands feel so fucking good."
The praise made you bolder. Your movements became more deliberate, your grip just a little tighter. He kissed you, messy and urgent, his free hand tangled in your hair. Your heart raced, the feeling of his skin on yours, the raw, unspoken want was overwhelming.
He pulled back with a small groan, his eyes dark and unfocused. He slowly brushed his cock through your slick folds, the sensation making you gasp. "Do you want to feel it raw first?" he said, his breath ragged. "Just the tip, and then I'll put a condom on."
"Yeah," you said, your insides clenching again.
"Fuck," he swore, his dick twitching. "You're gonna feel so good."
He pushed the head slowly inside of you and groaned low, feeling your walls tighten around him. A flicker of pain crossed your face, and he immediately kissed your jawline. "Talk to me. Does it hurt? I won't push further."
"No, it's good." He pushed in a little more, then stopped, waiting. "Okay," you said, and he pushed again, his own groan leaving his mouth.
"You're so fucking tight." Once he was halfway inside, you both stayed, getting used to each other.
"Harry," you breathed, your body adjusting to the new fullness.
"Does it hurt? Do you want me to stop?" he asked, a frown of concern on his face.
"No, I want to feel you inside, all the way," you said. His cock twitched at your words.
"I'll go for a condom. Don't move," he said. You moaned, a low, yearning sound as he slid out, the sudden emptiness making you ache. Your eyes dropped to his cock, glistening with both of your fluids.
"The sensation will be a bit dull," he warned. He came back, put the condom on, and pushed back inside you, a bit quicker this time, groaning as he felt the new sensation.
"Slow," you said, flinching slightly.
He did as told, and once he was all the way in, you were both panting, his breath hot against your ear. "Are you okay sunshine?" he asked.
"Yeah."
He began to move, the friction a delicious mix of pain and pleasure. Your hands gripped his back, scratching him lightly. "Shit, that feels good," he groaned.
"More," you pleaded, wanting him deeper.
"Fuck, sunshine," he moaned, moving faster. The sounds he made were the hottest thing you'd ever heard, and you let out your own soft "uhs" and "ahs" in his ear. The thought of being inside you was all he needed, and your small sounds pushed him to the edge.
"Harry..." you said, gripping his hair. "Fuck... I'm close again, I'm sorry."
"Don't you even dare... uh!... say sorry," he said, not hiding his own imminent climax. "Come whenever you need to."
"Ah... Harry," you moaned, and then he circled your clit with his thumb. Your legs began to shiver, and a loud moan of release escaped you.
Seeing your face, feeling your walls clench around him, he buckled his hips in sync with your spasms and came into the condom, hot cum filling it as he squeezed his eyes shut and held your waist tight.
You both breathed, your bodies still connected in a shared haze of heat and satisfaction. He pulled out slowly, taking a moment to compose himself. The raw passion was fading, replaced by a deep tenderness. He looked at you, his eyes still dark but now soft and gentle, and he reached out to gently push a stray hair from your forehead.
"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice low and a little rough, a stark contrast to the rough moans from moments before.
"Yeah," you said, a small, genuine smile gracing your lips. You were still humming with the aftereffects of the climax, a quiet thrumming of pleasure under your skin. "More than okay."
He looked down, his gaze traveling over your body before meeting your eyes again. "Did anything hurt? At all?" The concern in his face was so real, so disarming. It wasnât a perfunctory question; he genuinely needed to know.
"A little at first," you admitted, the honesty feeling easy between you now, "but it was fine. You went slow, just like you said." You reached for his hand, giving it a soft squeeze. "You were so good, Harry. You took such good care of me. Thank you"
His expression softened completely, a hint of a smile touching his lips. He leaned in and kissed you, this time a slow, lingering kiss that tasted of you and of the profound intimacy you'd just shared. There was no urgency, just a deep, abiding affection in the touch of his lips, then he suddenly scooped you up into his arms, bridal style.
"Hey!" you said, a surprised laugh escaping you as your arms went around his neck.
He just looked at you, a soft, loving smile on his face. "You're coming with me"
He carried you through the apartment, your head resting against his shoulder, your body still weak with pleasure and now cradled in his strength. You could feel the warmth of him, the steady beat of his heart against your chest. He gently set you down on the edge of his bed, the plush comforter feeling soft beneath you. You watched him disappear into the bathroom, and the sound of water running soon filled the quiet space, and then came back with a damp towel, and softly wiped you, making sure it was gentle.
âComeâ he said placing the towel on the bedside table and offered you a hand, now in the bathroom the bath all filled and smelling a bit like peaches, he helped you inside and crouched on the side making sure you were comfortable in the warm water, looking, no, admiring your body. âfeels good?â he said softly
âMmm yesâ you said closing your eyes but then turned to look at him âArenât you getting in?â she asked
âIâll go take a shower in yours and then iâll fix you up some dinnerâ he said kissing your forehead âThank you Sunshineâ
You blinked and looked again at him âfor what?âÂ
âFor coming into my life and changing itâŚthanks for making it better, thanks for bringing sunshine into meâ he said softly and kissed your hand.
summary - for a professional figure skater, youâre awfully clumsy.
a/n - hehehehehehe. trinity. just some fluffy fluff, figure skater!reader, girly girl reader. kinda wanna continue the story between these two, i love sunshine x grumpy!!! and trinity was MADE for it. also, iâm sure itâs obvious, but i am pretty much the furthest thing from a figure skater. enjoy!
---
You knew how Trinity could be. True, in your nearly five months of dating sheâd been nothing short of doting towards you, bringing your breakfast in the mornings, picking you up from classes, running you warm baths after long practices. Still, you knew her reputation. The second she turned away from you, her smile would drop into a practiced look of disdain.
You were quite the opposite, in many ways. You were pink, frilly, and polished. You knew how to get a crowd to root for you, how to impress judges, how to be the brightest star in the room.
Where Trinityâs instinct was to scowl, yours was to beam. You liked keeping fresh flowers around your apartment, while Trinity didnât see the point of keeping something that would die in less than two weeks. Still, she brought them to your dates. And she always laughed at the signs people waved in the stands at hockey games (âas if the players pay attention to thoseâ) but she still covered a posterboard in glitter and is the loudest supporter at any of your competitions.
So, no, Trinity wasnât always a fuzzy teddy bear. But you had each adapted to your environments.
Her focus and drive made her a great doctor. You hadnât had a chance to see her in her element, in her preferred environment surrounded by beeping machines and constant traumas, but sheâd had plenty of opportunity to demonstrate her know-how at home. This was due mostly to the fact that you were the world's biggest klutz.
On the ice? You were an angel. At least according to your girlfriend, and the forty or so medals and trophies you accrued over your career. You could glide around a rink like you were floating on air, executing the most precise of jumps, spins, and poses. Your balance was unmatched, timing impeccable. You had to have complete control over every muscle in your body to hold your leg above your head while teetering on a fraction of an inchâs worth of metal.
So how was it that the second you set foot outside the slipper, slidey surface, gravity turned from a mastered tool to a greatest enemy?
You often attracted odd looks in the warmer months when you let your skin breathe, what with all the bruises in varying states of healing littered about, accompanied frequently with scratches on your knees, elbows, and hands, mostly. Trinity always said you looked like a walking punching bag. All jokes aside, you had been questioned privately with social workers in ERs.
But you always assured concerned parties that you were completely safe. In fact, with the muscles your sport gave you, you might have been in a better position than most to defend yourself.
Besides, Trinity would never let anything happen to you. Her deep mistrust of people, specifically men, had her acting like a guard dog from time to time. If a man dared take a second glance in your direction, sheâd be placing her body between you, wrapping a protective arm around you and enacting the trademarked Trinity Glare until left alone.
You were always on the inside of the sidewalk. She insisted on walking close behind you in a stairwell, both to block view of your ass from pervy perversons, and to be at the optimal position to catch you should you slip. Which you frequently did.
Maybe it was her increased presence for the past half year that explained how youâd managed to go so long without an ER visit, but really it was inevitable. That didnât mean you were excited to pull up in front of the entrance labeled emergency in big red letters. Even worse knowing that Trinity was working.
âThanks, Liv,â you said tiredly to your chauffeur, a young, prospective olympian youâd been coaching.
âWhy donât I help you in?â she asked anxiously as you gathered your things and opened the door.
âOh, no, no, Iâm fine,â you waved away. âIâve had plenty of time to rest on the drive, thisâll be a piece of cake.â
If you hoped you could trick your ankle into agreeing with you by being delusional, you were wrong. The second you shifted your weight to the edge of the seat, a searing pain shot right up your leg and you gasped.
âRight,â said Liv, opening her own door. âIâm coming to help you.â
She ignored your protests as she rounded the car, wrestling your bags from your hands and taking your arm.
âDonât get a ticket just for this,â you sighed, though accepted her assistance. âI can hop!â
âIâm not letting you hop into the ER,â said Liv. âNow lean.â
Still grumbling, you hobbled along at her side, trying to be as light as possible and subsequently yanking poor Livâs neck as you crumbled. Very slowly, you made your way to the door. As you reached for the handle, a yell came from behind you.
âHey, you canât park here!â
You groaned.
âGo,â you said, then when Liv still hesitated, in your coach voice, âget outta here! Iâm fine.â
Liv made sure you had a good grip on the doorframe before carefully hanging your bags over your shoulders.
It was certainly harder without the two extra legs. You bumped into several disgruntled people and had said sorry more times than you could count before a nurse spotted you. She was a little older, short and wearing a hijab. She was just handing a man a sandwich when you caught her eye.
âOh, here you go, hun,â she said, moving like lightning to provide you with a wheelchair. âHave a seat.â
Feeling slightly embarrassed at the looks you were attracting, you plopped down without one iota of grace, heaving your duffel onto your lap. Peaking around your mountain of gear, you tried to reach the wheels, but the nurse got there first, pushing you to the end of a long line.
âThank you,â you said, and she smiled.
âOf course,â she said kindly. âHad a little accident?â
âGuilty,â you chuckled. âIâm a figure skater.â
âWow,â said the nurse, Perlah, her nametag read when you craned your head around. âIâm sure stuff like this happens all the time. I canât even walk down my driveway in wintertime.â
What really happened was this.
You were just finishing up Livâs practice, demonstrating a perfect triple axel. As you slipped on your skate guards and stepped onto the rubber matting, the tip of your shoe got caught in the strap of Livâs backpack. You hadnât made it two steps off the rink before taking a spectacular tumble into the bleachers, ending with your affected ankle tangled in nylon and velcro at an unnatural angle.
However, it was always easier to let people assume you fell doing some elaborate trick on the ice. For someone who could land three triple axels in a row, walking shouldnât be a major feat. Yet here you were, probably about to be served an outrageous bill for a completely avoidable fall.
You didnât like how big and clunky the wheelchair was, but at least it was a chair.
After you checked yourself in, and the waiting began, the stress of injury finally started taking its toll on your body. Perlah brought you a bag of ice to prop in the crook of your foot. You spent the next several hours jerking yourself awake every two minutes, arms tightening over your bags in a panic. The chances of getting robbed in a crowded ER waiting room full of sick and injured people were low, but skating gear was expensive enough to keep you on edge.Â
On hour three, after watching an older guy with a bad comb over disappear and return from behind the double doors three separate times with no update, and only one ice change, you considered texting Trinity. You were sure she would be able to push your case along, and would be mad you had waited the time you already did, but you shook the idea off. You had to remind yourself how insignificant a little sprain was compared to some of the things going on in the ward. There was a reason certain people went back before others. You had to wait your turn like everyone else.
By hour five, the windows were growing dark, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep your eyes open. In fact, if it werenât for the nagging rumbling of your empty stomach, you probably would have been passed out.
Finally, as the clock struck six, your name was called. You snapped upright, looking around until you spotted a tough looking blonde woman, reading off of a tablet with readers perched on her nose.
âThatâs me!â you said gratefully, making to stand.
âYou stay put,â she said in such a stern voice you promptly planted your butt firmly on the plastic seat.
She wheeled you expertly around the maze of people, bags, and IVs and through the heavy double doors. Your head was on a swivel as you entered the department, eyes searching for the familiar head of dark hair, unsure if you were hoping you did or didnât see it. You didnât, though, and Dana deposited you onto a bed in a small curtained area.
Compared to the borderline stifling air of the busy waiting room, this one was chilly. Perhaps it felt even colder than it was because of the stark white tile covering every surface, or the strong stench of antiseptic tickling your nose.
âAlright, maâam,â said the nurse, rubbing in a dollop of hand sanitizer and clicking into a computer. âMy name is Dana, Iâm the charge nurse on staff, and Iâm gonna be taking a look at you today, is that okay?â
âGreat,â you said.
âOkay, good,â she said typing away already. âSo, whatâs the story.â
You cleared your throat. You wondered what she could possibly be writing about before youâve even spoken a word. It made you nervous, but you recounted the tale as best you could, trying and failing to minimize the parts that made you sound like just as much of an idiot as you were sure you were.
âSo when you fell, did you hit your head?â You shook your head no. âNo loss of consciousness? Any dizziness? Okay, good.â
She sat down on a stool and rolled over to your bedside.
âMind if I take a look?â
âGo ahead.â
She tossed the now lukewarm back of melted ice in the bin behind her. You rushed to remove your sock, embarrassed about how sweaty it still was.
âSorry,â you said. âItâs â I just came from the rink, so Iâm not the freshest.â
âKid, Iâm an ER nurse,â Dana chuckled. âYour sweaty foot wouldnât even make the top one hundred list of worst smells. Besides, you just spent hours sitting in the damn waiting room, that couldnât have helped anything.â
You laughed along, and tried to relax. Dana put on gloves and slid your leggings up to your knee. She inspected the skin there.
âYouâve got some old bruises here,â she noted.
âYeah, not an uncommon occurrence,â you said. âIâm always a little banged up.â
Dana was just moving her attention to your purple ankle when you spotted the thick locks you were looking for between the narrow gap in the curtains. Your heart leapt, in relief, and uncertainty. You werenât sure how Trinity would react to seeing you here, especially knowing you hadnât texted her to let her know, but before you could help yourself you were calling her name.
âTrinity!â
Both Trinityâs and Danaâs heads turned at your cry. You could see your girlfriendâs swiveling around desperately, unable to spot you. Dana pulled the curtain open to reveal the source of the noise, and the second Trinityâs eyes locked onto you, you could see the panic behind them. They hardened slightly as she marched toward you, completely abandoning a conversation with a blonde, bespectacled doctor.
âYou two know each other?â asked Dana, looking slightly amused.
âWeâre, um,â you hesitated as Trinity drew closer. âDating.â
When she reached you, she yanked the curtain back closed, didnât even glance at Dana, and began questioning you.
âWhat happened? How long have you been waiting? Can you walk? Howâs your pain?â
You smiled fondly at her antics as she quickly pulled on a pair of gloves.Â
âIâm fine, just tripped over a backpack,â you said soothingly. âNo big deal.â
She snorted as if to say Iâll be the judge of that and continued firing questions, this time at Dana. Dana didnât need to be told, just stood from the stool so that Trinity could take her place.
âHave you conducted an anterior drawer test?â
âNo, I ââ
âWhat about a talar tilt test? Ottawa assessment?â
âNo, kid, none of that,â said Dana. âI barely got a visual assessment before you came barreling in.â
You glanced between the two.
âWhat are all those things?â you asked.
Trinity didnât answer, just bent over your foot, poking and prodding it. Dana sighed, and started untying your other shoe, waving away your attempts to help.
âRange of motion, essentially,â said the nurse. âTo assess the extent of damage to the ligaments in your foot.â
You nodded.
âAnd if it â ah, fucking hell, that hurt!â
Trinity had pressed above your ankle knob and sent pain spiking up your foot. She finally looked up at you.
âHere?â she pressed again.
âYes, there,â you hissed.
âHow about here?â she asked, pressing hard on the bony bump. You shook your head. âHere?â
She moved her nimble fingers from the ankle, to the top of the foot, to the pinky toe. You just kept shaking your head. She slowly tilted your foot inward, and you yelped.
âStop!â
âIâm thinking ATFL,â she said directly to Dana, who seemed to concur. âAlright, upsy daisy. I need to see you walk.â
âReally?â you sighed. âNeed to?â
âNeed to,â she said, and for the first time there was a hint of the familiar, soft Trin you were used to. âJust a couple steps. To the curtain and back, okay?â
You nodded, gritting your teeth, and she and Dana helped you rise gingerly to your feet. You were reluctant to put any weight on your injured ankle, but an encouraging nod from Trinity, and the squeeze of her hand as she held you up, had you take a deep breath.
It was excruciating, even more so than before. It was as though something large and spiky, like an enlarged version of a jack, was stuck in between your bones. You limped forward, spun on your good heel, and came right back to the bed. You kind of cheated, doing a sort of half jump onto the mattress in lieu of your last step, but Trinity didnât call you on it.
The next few minutes were uncomfortable, but nothing compared to walking, so you pursed your lips and didnât complain as Trinity, or Dr. Santos, here, pulled and twisted your sore joint every which way. Her frown deepened slightly as she worked, and despite the implications of that, and the pain, you couldnât help but smile at how cute her concentration face was.
âWhatâs the damage, doc,â you said when she seemed done. She shot you a less than amused look.
âOttawa negative, no x-ray indicated,â she said, and Dana immediately started clacking away at the keyboard again. âADT showed moderate mechanical laxity, approximately seven centimeters. Significant ecchymosis and swelling, tenderness and excessive gapping above the anterior talofibular ligament, most likely grade two. Could require up to six weeks of healing.â
âWoah, woah,â you said, holding up your hands. âHoney. English, please.â
She sighed deeply, ripping off her gloves with more force than strictly necessary, you felt.
âIt means no skating!â she said, tugging at her ponytail. âNo running. No tots classes. A lot of rest, ice, and gentle range of motion exercises!â
You blinked. She was very worked up over a little sprain. It wasnât like you hadnât had one before, actually, you had had much worse than a grade two sprain before. You looked at Dana, and the two of you smiled.
âI hope you donât talk to all your patients this way,â you said, voice alive with mirth.
Her eyebrows fell into a straight, rigid line, and her arms crossed. At that point, unable to hide the smile on her face, Dana left the makeshift room mumbling something about fresh ice.
âThis is serious,â said Trinity, and you tried to school your face.
âTrin,â you said, pulling one of her hands free and cradling it in your own. âBaby. Iâm sorry. But itâs really, really not.â
She wrenched her hand back and began pacing. It was hard with the limited space, and she made tight little circles around the vacated stool.
âHow can you say that?â she said. âYou could have been seriously hurt! You could have needed surgery! You could have ââ she paled ââ you could have been operated on by my ex-situationship.â
At that, you let out a loud laugh. You tried to stifle it, but when you saw the corner of Trinityâs mouth turn just the slightest bit up, you just let it out. As you laughed yourself silly, she sat down on the edge of your cot, trying not to smile too much. Eventually, though, she let out a chuckle or two.
âOh, wow,â you gasped when the giggles finally died down, wiping your eyes. âYeah, no, youâre right, Trin. That would have been a real emergency.â
She shook her head, but couldnât regain the stony disposition sheâd had before. She laced her fingers with yours.
âNext time this happens, âcause we both know thereâll be a next time,â she said, and you nodded. âCall me. Okay?â
Your smile turned tender as she let some of her worry through.
âIâll let you know, but I donât want you â pulling rank, and giving me someone elseâs spot, I know that goes against the⌠doctor code of⌠rules, or whatever.â
âI donât care about any of that,â she said, and you raised a brow. âI mean, I care. But I care about you, too. And, baby, when I saw you all laid up over here, and I just got out of a trauma, and as far as I knew you were safe at home, it ââ
Careful of your ankle, you scootched towards her on the bed. You cupped her tense face in your hands.
âI know,â you said, rubbing her cheek where she leaned into you. âIâm sorry. I didnât want to make you worry by telling you, but I guess I just made you worry more?â
She huffed.
âI think Iâm just gonna worry no matter what,â she said, gently gripping your wrists. âBut less, if I have details.â
âNoted,â you said.
Sneaking a quick glance around, and listening for footsteps that werenât coming, you pressed a quick peck to her lips.
âI need to wrap you in bubble wrap,â said Trinity, smirking a little. âOnly way to protect you from yourself, apparently.â
âIâd manage somehow,â you said.
Her hands slid down to your waist.
âAny chance I could convince you to use the employee entrance next time?â
âNot a chance,â you said seriously. âDonât go giving short cuts, Dr. Santos.â
She rolled her eyes.
âGod, youâre so honest, it makes me sick,â she jested. âIâm gonna go find out where Dana is with that ice. Be right back.â
With one last kiss to your forehead, she stood and reached for the curtain. But the second she pulled it back, she snapped it shut again, shoulders tensing. You shot her a confused look as she turned back around, a hand creating a canopy over her reddening face.
âOkay,â she said, so quietly you had to strain to make out the words. âAbout half of the Emergency Department staff are gathered just outside, watching our curtain.â
Your eyebrows furrowed, but your lip quirked at how anxious she seemed to be all of a sudden.
âWhy do you think that is?â you asked.
âIâm guessing Dana told them all who you were,â she said. âTo me.â
âAh ha,â you said, mockingly tapping your chin. âAlright, well. I think thereâs only one way to solve this.â
Much to Trinityâs horror, you swung your legs over the side of the bed and began hopping towards the curtain, she stepped in front of you, trying to steer you back.
âWhat do you think youâre doing?â she hissed. âYou donât even have a pair of crutches!â
âUm, Iâm pretty sure you should start ambulating as soon as possible after injury,â you said. âTo avoid complications. There was a poster about it in the hallway.â
Utilizing some of your speed and agility usually exclusive to the ice, you reached around her and pulled back the curtain. Indeed, an impressive group of people stood leaning against a cluster of desks, eyes trained in your direction. They quickly flitted away, trying to pretend they hadnât been, but you didnât mind. You thrived in the spotlight.
âHi! You must be Trinityâs coworkers!â
At your direct address, some shoulders relaxed, and some smiles reciprocated yours. Dana rushed out, holding a baggy of ice and a large boot.
âOh, here, doll,â she said, pulling a chair. âIf youâre gonna mingle, you need to be sitting down.â
Ignoring Trinityâs protests in the background, you hopped right into the chair, grinning around at everyone. They examined you, almost clinically, like it was habit. Their gazes lingered on your pink athletic wear, pink headband, and done up nails. Despite the harsh lighting of the hospital, your appearance seemed to brighten the place.
âSo, youâre TrinityâsâŚâ said a young looking girl, Victoria, once names had been exchanged.
âGirlfriend,â you chirped, enjoying the general air of bemusement over the doctors. âAlmost five months.â
âItâs lovely to meet you,â said the tall one, Robby.
âAnd you,â you said sweetly, pressing a hand to your heart. âTrinâs told me so much about you guys. You do amazing work here.â
Everyone seemed to preen, but Trinity had had enough.
âOkay,â she said, cutting in. âI know you like talking, but if we donât get that boot on you soon, youâre gonna, I donât know, sprain your other ankle. I know youâre the ice queen, but weâre on solid earth, right now.â
She wheeled you away while you waved, rather like royalty on a float.
âThatâs funny,â snorted Javadi.
âWhat?â
âCalling her âice queenâ,â she said. âThatâs usually a nickname for Santos.â
Summary -Â She met him by accidentâtripping over fate in a crowded market and into the arms of a male with wings, shadows, and a gaze that lingered too long. She called him creepy. He felt the bond snap like a blade to the heart.
She didn't know she'd been watched. He didn't know he'd finally been found.
What starts as coincidence turns into destiny tangled in laughter, bruises and shadows that adore her far too much.Â
She doesn't fall for the legend whispered about in courtsâshe falls for the male who catches her every time she stumbles.
And Azriel, who has lived centuries in silence, learns that some bonds don't bind. They bring you home.
Tags -Â fated mates, fluff, banter and teasing, opposites attract, sunshine x grumpy, healing love
Contents -
âŁď¸ One | The First Pull | 2.4k words
âŁď¸ Two | A Spark in the Dark | 2.4k words
âŁď¸ Three | Choosing Forever | 3.5k words
âŁď¸ Four | Safe in the Shadows | 2.3k words
âŁď¸ Five | Tender Hands | 2.4k words
âŁď¸ Six | Where Love Lands | 2k words
ACOTAR Masterlist
A/n -Â As always content warnings will be at the start of each chapter, so please be sure to read them before continuing.
Another requested fic that I whipped up fairly quickly, and I had so much fun writing!! It's a little reminiscent of "Afterglow" and "Fated" but quickly took on a life of its own :)
Expect lots of fluff, banter, and flirty chaos. She's all sunshine and clumsy energy, and he's... well, the perfect solid base to catch her every stumble x
Please don't hesitate to vote or comment along the way, it truly means the world to me <3
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letting their chatty partner ramble about their day, listening with a small smile
sunshine toppling over them with the biggest hug they could muster and grump just giving them tiny little pats to reciprocate
grumpy going out of their comfort zone to cheer up their sunshine who's having a bad day
^ "look, i made pancakes! i even made a smiley face out of the whipped cream, see?" "oh, that's what it's supposed to be? you're so cute.."
grumpy calling sunshine names (dummy, idiot, chatterbox) knowing they take no offense to them, but the moment someone else does, they snap
"are you always this happy?" "i try to be, but especially when i'm with you."
sunshine knowing when it's okay to push but never crosses a line when it comes to grumpy's boundaries
sunshine comforting the grump when they're a little more quiet and snappy than usual, leaving grump a flustered mess because they're used to people actually listening when they tell them to leave them alone
"i'm not leaving you like this, i care about you."
sunshine taking grumpy on more active dates than they're used to (like ice skating for example)
[while cloudgazing] "i see a duckling!" "literally how."
sunshine making lunch for grumpy in the cutest way possible (little notes, heart-shaped sandwiches, always adding their fave snack)
getting into arguments about how nice sunshine can be and where it gets out of hand
^ "i was just trying to be nice!" "they were clearly taking advantage of that!" "since when do you care so much?" "i'm trying to look out for you!"
grumpy letting sunshine play with/do their hair
when laundry piles up and grumpy has no choice but to borrow one of sunshine's colorful little sweaters
^ and of course, sunshine coos and smothers them all day over it
angst to fluff, sunshine x grumpy, soft/ reassuring max
Max was in a mood. It wasnât unusual by any means. After a long week of media, simulator sessions, back-to-back sponsor calls- well, wouldnât you be grumpy too? Tonight was different, however. The weight seemed to settle on his shoulders heavier than usual. He had practically dragged himself into the apartment, toed off his shoes and thrown himself onto the couch with his limbs sprawled and head tilted back. Â
(Y/n), the human embodiment of sunshine Max called his girlfriend, sat across from him and started animatedly recounting the events of her day. Normally he loved to listen to her stories, as long winded as they may be. Said that it helped distract him from the pressures of the track, that it made him feel normal. He would shut his brain off and look at her with those loving puppy eyes he always had when he listened intently. Today, though, as she waved her hands around in the air, he rubbed his hand over his face and sighed. Â
â...and then! The barista was all confused because she thought I ordered two drinks, and really, I had only wanted the one-â Â
He finally looked up at her. âCan you just get to the point?â Â
The words werenât sharp, not exactly- but they landed like glass shattering in her heart. (Y/n)âs throat went dry and her hands froze mid-air. Max knew better. He knew how her love language was quality time and words of affirmation. Knew that she struggled with being called âtoo loudâ and âtoo muchâ her whole childhood and adolescence. Knew that her parents would ask her âHow was your day?â and would quickly tell her she had three minutes because they didnât âhave time to listen to her all night.â He knew how hard sheâd worked to stop shrinking herself, to stop rethinking every word before it left her mouth. Â
With a quick swallow and look away, she forced herself to finish. âRight. Uh- they gave me both drinks. That was it.â Her tone was clipped, nothing like her usual bubbling excitement. As she wrapped her arms around herself and sat still for a moment, Max didnât notice the shift in her demeanor as he was too wrapped up in his exhaustion. The rest of the night passed quietly. Too quietly. Â
The next morning, Max woke up to an unfamiliar silence. There was no soft humming from the kitchen, no rambling commentary about the news she read before she got up this morning. More so, the spot next to him in bed wasnât even warm. She had been up for a while. Â
When he finally ventured out of the bedroom, (Y/n) was making coffee, her back to him. She handed him a mug, just the way he liked it, without saying a word. âThanks.â He murmured, watching her. She only nodded. Â
The thing is, (Y/n) wasnât even trying to prove a point. She didnât want to be mean, didnât want to hurt him. She genuinely thought that he would prefer the quiet, that he needed the break. She didnât realize how much he genuinely looked forward to hearing her, how much he missed her voice when he was away at races. How he would call her no matter the time zone just to hear her speak.Â
It wasnât until later, after another day of training and a night not filled with her usual chatter- that he realized something was off. She was off. There, but just out of reach. Guarded. He sat down at the kitchen table, staring at her as she scrolled on her phone. â(Y/n),â he called out, voice more gentle than the night before. She looked up. âWhy are you so quiet today?âÂ
She hesitated, looking away before answering. Eventually she shrugged. âI just- I didnât want to be a bother.â The words hit him like a punch and his stomach dropped. He knew exactly what she meant and exactly where it came from. He set his glass down, stood, and crossed the room to get to her. Â
â(Y/n).â He took her phone from her hands, set it aside, and crouched down so he was eye level with her. âHey. Look at me. Last night- that was mean of me. Okay? I was tired and I wasnât thinking but thatâs not an excuse and I know that. But I need you to know, I love your stories. Every single one. The ones that take three minutes or the ones that take three hours.â Â
Her eyes flickered with doubt, finally looking at him, and she caught her lip in between her teeth. âYou sounded like them. Like my parents.â Her voice was barely a whisper. âLike I was too much.â Â
Maxâs chest ached. He shook his head firmly. âNo. Youâre never too much. Youâre... youâre the best part of my day. Even when Iâm grumpy. Especially then.â He reached up now, cupping her cheek. âDonât stop talking to me, (Y/n). Please.â His voice changed, going from soft to pleading. For a moment, she looked at him, unsure. But then the tension in her shoulders softened, and she let out the smallest laugh. âYou really were being grumpy.â Â
He grinned sheepishly, relief washing over him. âI know. It wonât happen again. Or if it does, you have full permission to throw something at me.â Â
(Y/n)âs smile finally reached her eyes, and Max felt something settle in his chest. As he wrapped his arms around her, she let out a breath that sounded suspiciously like surrender. Â
âThree minutes or three hours, huh? Pick one and prove it.â He laughed, the sound easy and ridiculous, and kissed the tip of her nose. Â
âThree hours. Starting with when the barista accidentally thought you had a twin and made two lattes.â Â
Outside, the world carried on with its noise and pressure and stress. But in here? In the little corner they had made together? They were comfortable and unhurried as (Y/n) resumed her story and this time, he listened like it was the only thing he needed to do. Â
đŚš× âËâšâ grumpy!bruce wayne x sunshine!fem reader
CONSISTS OF ⏠fluff. grumpy bruce. you're his partner for a mission. bruce falls first and hard. bruce in denial. cheeky lil reader. silly little cheesy trope. sfw.
ââ .⌠On a high-stakes mission, Bruce Wayne canât stand working with the endlessly bright and fearless operative â yet every sharp word he throws your way only seems to draw you closer. You threaten his control, your tension igniting in ways heâs not prepared for, and suddenly the shadows feel a little too small for both of you.
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The first time Bruce Wayne actually looked at you during a mission, it was like someone had thrown a flare into the middle of his carefully controlled night. He had been perched on the edge of a rooftop, scanning a cluster of shipping containers for signs of their target, all precise and methodical, like he always was. And then youâd climbed up behind him â effortless, smiling like the world was a playground rather than a potential war zone.
âYouâre late,â he said, voice low and a little dangerous. He didnât even bother turning to face you. The words were clipped, precise, but the tension in them made the air between you feel almost solid.
âTraffic was killer,â you chirped, like the worldâs gravest threat was nothing more than a detour. You set down your pack with a soft thud, brushing hair behind your ear, all sunshine and easy warmth that somehow made him want to snap, and not in a good way.
âYou mean you got caught up in a cab.â His tone was flat, almost cutting, like he could slice through optimism with a single syllable.
âI got caught up in life,â you corrected, still smiling, your voice gentle, but underneath it all there was a steadiness that somehow made him want to grind his teeth and smile at the same time. It was infuriating.
He didnât answer, just swung his grappling hook with mechanical precision and disappeared into the shadows, like he always did, leaving you to follow on your own terms. Except tonight, he had to follow yours too, because you were his partner for this. Because of that, he had to remind himself at least five times that night that this was something he was doing reluctantly.
Once you landed at his side, the walk through the containers was tense in a way that vibrated under his skin. He was all sharp edges, eyes scanning, every movement efficient, every comment a warning.
âYou really donât do stealth well,â he muttered when you stepped over a loose plank, making a little creak.
âOh, I do,â you teasedlightly, like you werenât even aware of it. âI just like to announce myself so people know how charming I am before I take them down.â
That made him pause mid-step, one eyebrow lifting. âCharming?â His voice was a growl, though whether it was from disbelief, or the fact that he hadnât expected a response that didnât involve embarrassment or fear... he wasnât sure.
âYes, charming,â you nodded, stepping around him as if he werenât the storm cloud of a man in the room. âYou might want to try it sometime. Itâs refreshing! And disarming, which is a plus side when this is your job.â
Bruce tensed his jaw, but he didnât argue, which was rare. That quiet pause of his was loud enough to almost make you feel guilty, except you didnât. Instead, you pressed on, moving like light threading through the darkness, your confidence a quiet hum in the space between his clipped motions.
At one point, he had to crawl through a narrow air vent to follow the target, and of course, you fit right in behind him without a single complaint, smiling up at him like it was the most natural thing in the world.
âYou always do this, donât you?â he muttered. His voice was tight, and there was an edge that made your chest squeeze in that same way it did every time he looked at you with something between irritation and fascination.
âThis?â you asked. âSmiling when everyone else is panicking?â
âYes,â he deadpanned. âThis. Talking. Moving. Somehow making every bad situation slightly less bad. I canât-.. I canât think when you do that.â
You laughed softly, a sound that was light and warm, and somehow he wanted to reach out and stop you just to see if it would change anything.
âYouâre not supposed to think,â you said, as if reading his mind, which was probably true. âYouâre supposed to act. And honestly, I think youâre brilliant at it. Just⌠donât let the little annoyances-... â your eyes twinkled, â...like me, apparently, get in the way.â
âAnnoyances,â he repeated under his breath while crawling to the next vent hatch, but there was a tightness in his chest that betrayed the frustrated tone he took on. You were definitely in his way, and yet, impossibly, he felt like he couldnât get rid of you even if he wanted to.
The mission itself went with a brutal precision, the kind of calculated movements and silent take downs Bruce excelled at. And every time you had to improvise, every time you flashed that damn smile at a guard, every time your voice threaded through the comms with calm cheer, he had to bite back a growl, swallow it down, and just... function. He couldnât argue with the results, even if your presence made his chest tighten in ways he didnât want to name.
By the time the last target was secured, and you were crouched together in the shadows watching the authorities cart away the bad guys, Bruce finally let himself exhale.
âYouâre impossible,â he muttered, almost to himself.
âAm I?â you asked softly, leaning just a fraction closer. Your hand brushed against his as you passed him the comms unit, and he didnât move his. Didnât pull away. Didnât even comment.
âYouâre⌠too much,â he said finally, eyes flicking to you in that precise, calculating way that made your stomach twist deliciously.
âI prefer the term âmore than manageable,ââ you joked lightly, a grin tugging at your lips.
Bruceâs jaw tightened, but there was something there â something he didnât admit aloud, something he would never admit aloud. He liked it. Hated that he liked it. Loved that he hated it.
And as you finally climbed down the last ladder together, stepping into the night air of the city, you laughed softly, bright, warm, and entirely infuriating.
âYou know,â you said, bumping his shoulder gently as you walked, âif you ever decide to be less grumpy, Iâm really very approachable.â Your words were punctuated with a wink that made him groan.
âDonât,â he cut into your sentence sharply, voice low and sharp, but you caught the faintest curve of something almost⌠reluctant in it.
You smiled anyway, because you always did, because that was your true power. And somehow, he knew that he would be following that smile into the shadows again the next night, whether he wanted to or not.