its ok cuz im gonna die soon
seen from Finland
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its ok cuz im gonna die soon

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I plant roots so deeply in the people I love that I always lose a piece of myself when they go.
- Beau Taplin
Dally is interesting
like he died by assistant suicide with police
he died because he lost the person he loved
on a reread I realized that Pony’s parents knew Dally. Pony said his mom was the only person who had a handle on Dally.
which I think is what makes him so interesting
the only real motherly figure has had is dead
+ three of his group is grieving that mother
+
the boy he cares about because he sees himself in and everything like that regularly experiences abuse on a daily basis
he can’t help him
it is out of his control
+
he seen people die in New York
he killed people in New York
so add possibly PTSD
+
everyone thinks he’s trash
+
he actively seeks fights
+
then his boy gets jumped bad
the boy who didn’t give a reaction when being beat by his own father is sobbing
the boy looked dead
+
then he has to help the boy he cares about and the son of the only motherly figure he had become fugitives
+
the house sets on fire that was the safe house that he chose
+
His boy died
“Johnny was the only thing Dally loved and now Johnny was gone. I knew he would be dead cause Dally Winston wanted to be dead and he always got what he wanted.”
“Dally was there, too, swearing under his breath, and turning away with a sick expression on his face. I wondered about it vaguely. Dally had seen people killed on the streets of New York’s West Side. Why did he look sick now?”
Throwback to when I was gonna kill myself and my dad walked in on me doing it #embrassed
I told you

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World Suicide Prevention Day
To someone who is suicidal, let them know you care and they are not alone: Saying something as simple as, “I'm here for you, and I care about you. You don't have to go through this alone,” can be incredibly powerful. It reassures the person that they are not facing their pain in isolation.
FUCK IT
IM GONNA KILL MYSELF I SWEAR. IM GONNA FUCKING DO IT THIS TIME.
I try to make shit better and I can't stop this fuck it FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK IT IM GONNA DO IT I SWEAR.
Stupid ass life stupid ass shit Im fucking done. IM DONE.
ALL BECAUSE THEY DON'T. FUCKING. LISTEN.
FUCK THIS.
IM DONE TRYING!
suicidal people give off enough signs before they actually do it, but the people around them never care enough to save them—and then they fucking regret it, like the audacity